What Hurts the Most
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house Its hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go What hurts the most What hurts the most was being I'm saying that loving you
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok
But that's not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying' to do
But I'm doing' It
Its hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, living' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
That's what I was trying' to do
I looked at the pregnancy test in my hand with tears dripping down my face. It had a small little pink plus sign. I smiled brilliantly. Edward and I had been trying to conceive for a while now, and we finally got our wishes.
I couldn't tell him now; we were getting ready to go to the family Fourth of July barbeque cookout. I will tell him tomorrow night, I decided. Over a candle light dinner with all his favorite foods. I quickly threw away the test and got ready, throwing on a softball outfit Alice, my best friend and sister in law, had gotten for me.
Edward and I had been married three years now. We were so in love then, and we are even more passionately in love now.
Edward stepped in the room just as I had picked up the suit. His eyes raked over my half naked body. I giggled. He was as lustful as he was a teenager. He came up to me and wrapped his arms around me.
"They can wait another half hour," he whispered seductively and I couldn't help but moan as he fondled my breast. His other hand trailed down my waist slowly, teasingly, until he reached my nether regions. I gasped as he touched and played with my clit.
"No foreplay, Edward, please!" I pleaded. He growled and threw me on the bed roughly. He discarded of my under garments and took off his clothes before I could attempt to. He aligned himself at my entrance and slowly pushed in. We groaned at the sensation.
"Bella," he groaned. My body thrilled at the sound. "You're so tight," he thrust slowly into me, in and out, in and out. I cried out as he reached that sweet spot.
"Harder, faster!" I cried. He groaned and sped up. He hit my G-spot harder and faster, making me cry out in pleasure. My walls clenched around him as I came hard, wave after wave after wave of pleasure pounding out of me and onto him. He came right after me screaming my name as I screamed his. He collapsed on top of me.
"That was… amazing," I panted. He chuckled.
"It's always amazing with you, Bella," he said sweetly. I smiled and pecked him on the lips. Then we got ready to go.
At the barbeque
My stomach was hurting so much. God, what is wrong with me? I talked to Alice, Rose, Jasper, Emmett, Esme and Carlisle, had a hamburger with a few fries and some water. I walked up to Edward.
"Edward, I'm not feeling too good, can we please leave?" I pleaded. My stomach was getting worse. Edward groaned in frustration.
"Not now, Bella. We're about to play softball, then watch the fireworks. Just a few more hours and we can go home," he said, brushing me off. I sighed. I guess I could live with the pain for a while. About an hour later, we all started playing softball. I was the pitcher first, then the outfield.
My body was covered in a light sheen of sweat. I felt so light headed and dizzy. I didn't know which way was which. Everything was spinning around me. I didn't even notice when my eyes rolled into the back of my head and I fell to the ground, my knees collapsing underneath me.
EPOV
Bella wanted to go home, but I was having too much fun. Having a beer with the guys again after months of rarely seeing them, watching a football game, playing sports together. She isn't having fun, so she wants to drag me down too. At least, that's what I thought.
We were playing softball. I was taking Bella's place as pitcher and she went to the outfield. I didn't notice how she looked so sick. I pitched to Jasper and he hit the ball with a resounding crack and it went into the outfield. He ran to first base. I turned to Bella to see her fall to the ground. I sighed, shaking my head. So clumsy, that girl. I waited for her to get up, thinking she was okay. She didn't.
I walked over to her annoyed. I was about to tell her to stop playing games when I saw her face. Her eyes were closed, her eyebrows scrunched in pain, her arms were wrapped around her stomach, and her face was covered in sweat. Tears poured down her face. She was unconscious though. I ran to her side, throwing off my baseball cap, putting her head in my lap.
"Breathe slowly, Bella," I instructed into her ear. "It's okay." Suddenly, after a few minutes, I heard an ambulance. They came and took us away. I rode with her on the way to the hospital. She was so out of it, her eyes were frantically shooting around the ambulance. I waited in the waiting room nervously with my family. Then, a doctor came in and called my name.
"Is she alright?" I asked frantically. He smiled gently. He was old, in his late 60's mid 70's.
"She will be just fine. She had an ectopic pregnancy, but she will be just fine now," he said. I froze. Did he just say…? Yes he did. My Bella and I are pregnant. "I can take you to her if you like?" He said and I nodded.
I sat down by her side and she smiled at me tiredly.
"Hey, baby," I whispered. The doctor looked at Bella's charts.
"Well, everything seems in order, the baby is just fine now," he said and Bella looked at him.
"What happened?" She asked. He smiled warmly.
"You had an ectopic pregnancy. Don't worry, we fixed it, the baby will be just fine," he said then left the room. Bella fell asleep quickly. She's okay, I thought. She's okay. I decided to go home and take a quick shower and changed my clothes.
When I got out of the shower, the phone rang. I wrapped the towel around my waist and answered the phone.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Hello, is this Edward Cullen?" A female voice asked.
"This is him, how can I help you?"
"Your wife, Isabella Cullen is hurt badly. Her heart has stopped twice and the doctor said you should come down here," she said and I hung up, threw some clothes on and ran out to my car, driving to the hospital.
I saw the nurses face outside my Bella's bedroom. And I knew, she was gone. The doctor came up to me.
"I'm so sorry, we did everything we could. We don't know what went wrong, I'm so sorry," he said regretfully. I fell to my knees with my head in my hands. She's gone… she's gone…
