Tied with Derek
Chapter 1
Wednesday 5 p.m.
Casey and Derek were sitting on an ugly, uncomfortable green couch in the last place either of them wanted to be together.
"So can you tell why you're here?," asked Doctor Payne.
"Our parents forced us to come here," answered Casey.
"And why is that?"
"They're sick of us fighting," said Casey. She turned her head and glared at Derek.
"And how do you feel about being here?"
"I think it's a complete waste of time. I mean, we'll never get along no matter how many shrinks they send us to," Derek said.
"And why is that?"
"Because we hate each other?" said Casey.
"And why do you hate each other?"
"Derek basically makes my life a living hell," said Casey.
"Is that true Derek?"
"She is such a drama queen. She's the one that ruined my life," said Derek.
"And how did she do that?"
She moved into my house and is trying to take over my life. Five seconds after she moves in she trys to take my bedroom," said Derek.
"Are there any other reasons you don't like each other?"
Casey and Derek fell silent. They couldn't think of any other reason to hate each other.
"Well, good news. All your conflicts can be resolved just by talking openly and honestly about how you feel."
I don't like the sound of that, thought Derek.
I don't want to know what Derek thinks, thought Casey.
After another thirty minutes of Derek and Casey answering the doctor's questions sarcastically, he finally said,
"I'm afraid we're out of time, we will continue this on Friday. I would like to talk about how your parents met and your first meeting."
Derek and Casey felt relieved it was finally over, but they knew the tough part was yet to come. Doctor Payne shook their hands and walked them to the hallway where Nora and George were waiting.
"How did it go in there?," asked George.
"I think we can really make some progress as long as they come twice a week," said Doctor Payne.
"Thank you so much Doc," said George as he shook the doctor's hand.
"It will be such a relief when they finally get along," said Nora.
Derek just rolled his eyes while Casey flashed a fake smile.
"Let's go home," said George. They all left the office. Derek thought of a plan on the way home so he wouldn't have to go again.
Casey was sitting on her bed reading Catcher in the Rye when Derek barged in.
"Dont you ever knock?," asked Casey.
"I don't knock on doors in my own house. He sat down at the foot of Casey's bed.
We have to figure out a way to get out of this," said Derek.
"For once, I agree with you," said Casey.
"In case you haven't heard, I'm not that big on talking about my feelings," said Derek. Derek couldn't let Casey know how he really felt about her.
"And you think I want to hear you personal thoughts?," said Casey. The truth was Casey did really want to know what Derek thought of her.
"I have an idea," said Derek. Casey didn't like the sound of that. She wasn't quite ready to trust him.
Dinner later that night
The entire family was sitting around the dining room table eating the latest disaster George had cooked up when Casey and Derek executed their lame plan.
"Casey may you pass me the peas, please" asked Derek.
"I would be delighted to," said Casey.
Nora and George looked at each other unconvinced of Derek and Casey's politeness.
Would you like more potatoes?," asked Casey.
"That would be delightful, thank you," said Derek.
Casey picked up the big bowl of mashed potatoes and smiled at her mom. Even Marti could see through their plan.
"It's not working," said George.
"Why whatever do you mean father?," asked Derek.
"Knock it off. You think me and Nora are gonna fall for this when we didn't even fall for it last time," said George.
"Fall for what? Me and Derek really did work out our differences," said Casey.
"After one session?," asked Nors as she smiled at George.
"He's that good," said Derek.
"You two are going on Friday, no excuses," said George.
Friday 6 p.m.
The day before basically consisted of Casey and Derek ignoring each other while Casey prayed for a Derek to get an illness, nothing too serious, but just serious enough to get out of their session on Friday.
Casey and Derek were waiting in the therapist's office. Derek was flirting with the young blonde secretary in the waiting room.
"So how long have you been working here?," asked Derek.
"How old are you," she replied.
"Age aint nothing but a number," said Derek.
"Actually its a felony. I'm 23 and you clearly are not," she said.
Derek just walked back to his seat next to Casey. "Not a word," he said as he sat down and pointed his finger at her.
"I can't believe you, that was so lame," said Casey.
"It was worth a shot," said Derek. "And talk about lame, you went out in the cold in a T-shirt yesterday."
"I thought if I got sick, I wouldn't have to come today," said Casey.
"You heard what my dad said, no excuses."
The doctor is ready to see you," said the secretary.
Casey walked in first with Derek behind her. Derek winked at the secretary and she just rolled her eyes. After he went in she smiled.
"Good to see you, Casey and Derek," said Doctor Payne.
"Wish I could say the same doc," said Derek.
"Please sit."
They each sat on opposite ends of the couch with their arms crossed across their chests. Casey put a pillow between them and crossed her legs while Derek's legs were wide open.
"So have you two given any thought to what we were talking about on Wednesday?"
"Refresh my mind," said Derek.
"What mind? He means how our parents got together, Derek. Do you see what I have to deal with?," said Casey as her foot moved up and down.
"Casey, how did they meet?"
"Well my mom told me they were set up on a blind date," said Casey.
"Really? Cuz I heard she consulted my dad about a lawsuit against you. Apparently you were supposed to be back at the zoo by six," said Derek.
"And how long were they dating before you were introduced?"
"I'd say about a month," said Casey.
"It was more like six weeks," said Derek.
"You see what I mean, doctor? If I said the sky was blue, he'd say it was green," said Casey.
"Let's say it was five weeks." The doctor was becoming noticeably impatient. He patted his forehead with a small folded white handkerchief. Casey and Derek both realized that he sweat a lot for a such a skinny guy.
"Anyway, what was your first impression of Derek?"
"I thought he was a little, insufferable, sexist, jerk, but I was wrong," said Casey.
"Wrong about what?"
"He's not little," said Casey.
"She would know. She saw me naked once when I was getting out of the shower," said Derek. Casey was too busy remembering that moment to respond.
"I'm not sure that's relevant here, but Derek what did you think of Casey?"
"I thought she was a stuck up ice queen," said Derek.
"And has your opinion changed since then?"
"Are you serious, my opinion's gotten worse," said Derek.
"Mine too." Casey picked up the pillow and threw it at him. It hit Derek's face and Casey laughed. Derek put the pillow back down between them.
"She's so hostile," Derek said as he pointed his finger at her.
"This obviously isn't working. I think we should do a little role playing."
Derek and Casey looked at the doctor like he had two heads.
"Okay Derek pretend your Casey and Casey you pretend to be Derek. Start by talking about school."
"I am so perfect. I get A's in everything, and if I don't, I hound the teacher till I do," said Derek twirling his hair.
"School? The only subjects I care about are sports and cleavage, where's my remote?," said Casey.
"All I do is study study study, thats what a person does when they have no life and no friends," said Derek.
"I sure hope I'll like my job at the gas station, since I have no skills or determination."
"I hope I like the house my rich, drunk husband pays for and my resentful children who live in it."
It was like watching a tennis match where the ball is replaced by insults.
"Stop, both of you. I suggest you get to know each other before you make such judgements. You'll find that you have a lot more in common than you think."
"And how do you suggest we do that doc," asked Derek.
"I'm going to need to talk to your parents, are they in the waiting room?"
"They should be, to pick us up," said Casey.
The doctor left and came back in the office with Nora and George.
They looked nervous as they sat down between Casey and Derek.
"Do you want to give them shock therapy, or something?," asked George.
"No, nothing that drastic." The doctor obviously couldn't recoginize humor.
"I want Derek and Casey to spend the weekend tied together."
"What?!," yelled Casey.
"What kind of loon did you get us mixed us up with?," said Derek.
"Derek," George said embarrased.
"What about when we go to the bathroom or take a shower, not like Derek ever takes showers on the weekends," said Casey.
"No. Of course you can untie each other then."
"Wait, I have a hockey game this weekend." said Derek.
"You can untie Casey from you right before and after the game, but with everything else, you're going to have to compromise. Derek you're going to have to do some things Casey wants to do, and Casey you're going to have to do some things Derek does."
Casey was mortified. This is going to be the weekend from hell, she thought.
This could be fun, thought Derek.
A/N: I hope you laughed while reading this chapter, that was why I wrote it. Please review and remember if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. j/k. More laughs to come, suggestions for where you want the story to go are greatly appreciated.
Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek
