The Ultimate Crossover of Randomness

A Harry Potter, Twilight, and Maximum Ride crossover production

Directed and produced by Bagoosa and Schatten-chan

Disclaimer: We do not own any of these series. All we own is THE SHOELACE.

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of Number 4, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. Maximum Ride and her merry band of mutants were proud to say they were perfectly unnormal, thank you very much. The Cullens were a bunch of weirdos only pretending to be normal. What will happen when their two- I mean three- worlds collide? *bum bum bum THE SHOELACE*

So it was just another normal morning in Max's flock. Max the Grouch, Fang the Emo, Angel the Evil, Nudge the Abnormal, Gassy the Farter, and don't forget, Iggy the Really-Cool-Blind-Dude.

Max and the rest of the Flock were in England. No one knows why. The Cullens were there, too. Carlisle and Esme and Emmett and Rosalie and Alice and Jasper and Edward and Bella. (They left Renesmee at home with Jacob and were regretting their decision every moment.) They were visiting Carlisle's grave. Just as Alice said, "Isn't it cool that we're visiting Carlisle's grave with Carlisle?" Fang, way up in the sky, looked down and saw Edward. Happy to find another emo freak, he did a dive and crashed into the unsuspecting vampire. It probably hurt, but he didn't even say ow.

"Yo. You're emo. That flies," said the untalkative birdboy. Then Albus Dumbledore appeared and started telling Edward (in mermish, of course, as everyone thought Edward was an emo mermaid) that they needed him to hold some kids hostage underwater for some other kids to save.

Gassy, the curious little bugger he was, dove and fell onto Rosalie. He farted because he felt threatened by her beautiful fierceness. "Aaaw, you're so cute." Rosalie said, using up the breath she had left. (She was wisely holding her breath.) Rosalie had always had a soft spot for children, even if they did fart in her face.

Max thought Fang was going to flirt with Bella (even though her hair was brown) and flew down before he had the chance. She pulled him into a giant kiss, and they began a make-out session that wasn't even interrupted by Emmett's wolf-whistles.

Nudge and Angel (Iggy wasn't with them because he decided to go to culinary school) flew down because they felt alone and love. Then the Flock became friends with the Cullens (because the Cullens are just so nice and welcoming). Dumbledore was fascinated by all of them and decided to invoke some of his wisdom on who he decided were his new best friends. "When sinking- no, that's not right. As we survive through the- that's bad, too. When sinking down we learn loneliness- who comes up with this stuff? Let's all go back to Hogwarts and eat a feast (the Cullens can dine apon Voldemort) and live happily ever after.

THE END