Hi everyone! Here is a short one-shot from Catherine's point of view before she died. As we don't know much of the character, I have to admit I used some of my own headcanons. I am sorry if she looks too much OOC.

The series and characters do not belong to me (otherwise the Freelancers would still be alive and Gardiner too...)

Enjoy :)


The clock is running

Three times he stabbed me.

Three times I've heard him whispering his hatred to me.

I can feel my body slowly collapsing on the floor. It is refusing to obey to me. I do not want to collapse, not now, not here. Well, I suppose my plea does not matter anymore, I've done my time here.

It does not matter, indeed. I do not care for that. Death is death, and I know what it means. I am not afraid, no, I shall never be afraid of dying. This won't last forever.

Now I can only think about one thing.

His face and his last words are still haunting my mind. Did I do something wrong? Is this why he let me die? I can barely feel my body hitting this beautiful floor, but it still does not matter.

Why isn't he here to tell me what to do? I need him, I need to see him, I need to talk to him. My Savior, he gave me a purpose to serve, the one I would give my life for.

Why is he abandoning me? Why does he let it happen?

What did I do wrong, my Savior? Was I not ready enough to see the world as you wanted me to see it? Was I not good enough to serve you anymore? Was I not a good and an obedient disciple?

Life is leaving me for good. The hardest is not even the physical pain. I don't feel my own blood covering my clothes. I could even forget about my wounds, because the hardest pain is in my heart. What am I leaving to this world? I was no one for this timeline. No one will ever remember me and my actions. No one except the survivors. But is there at least one survivor?

Dead, they are all dead. My colleagues, my team, my friends. My family, too. Why, why? Did it happen because I was a bad leader? Am I responsible for this carnage? Probably yes. They all warned me, first Curtis then Kiera.

Curtis and Kiera, the ones who betrayed me. The ones who betrayed us all. I should have been called Naivety. It would have been the perfect name for me. Too naïve to see the truth. All is my fault, right?

I know it is all my fault. I am the guilty one here. No one deserved to die because of my silly decisions. This is my punishment, right? I am only dying because I was useless and unworthy of his trust. I was so sure of doing the right things.

Please, forgive me. Everyone, forgive my mistakes. I helped them killing you. I am sorry, I am so sorry. I failed you all. I failed him. I am sorry, my Savior. My Traveler. I disappointed you, I know it. I disappointed every of them. Death is my punishment.

Try to forgive me, please.

Baby girl, almost an adult but still my little one, forgive me too. I was a bad leader. I was also a bad mother. I'll die and you'll be free of me, finally.

Death is taking me, I can feel it now. What does breathing mean? What are these sounds? Is someone walking away from me? Is someone whispering his hatred to me a last time? I don't know. I just don't know.

Forgive me, please. Please…


Very short as you just saw it. English not being my native language, I am pretty sure I did many mistakes. Feel free to report them to me and I'll exterminate them. Thanks for reading :)

One last word: Catherine, could you just come back to life please?