A/N: Hello readers who happened to be scrolling down the list of fan fiction tales and happened to stumble upon this one and though '… whatever' and clicked the title. This is my second fic on this site so far, and so I want HARD criticism and FLAMES! *maybe not the flames*Don't be afraid to tell me if there is something I need to fix and, all positive remarks are very, very welcome! I just want you all to grab some popcorn eat some ice-cream, kick back and relax and totally choke on it with laughter with my attempt at comedy!

Thank you and enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto if I did team 7 would be Naruto, Sasuke, and Hinata and Sakura would have died in the fight against Sasori and, Deidara would still be blowing up stuff! Oh and NEJI WOULD STILL BE KICKING!

Summary: Sasuke and Naruto two problematic teens struggling with their advanced math. It's either get a tutor or repeat 12th grade! Can they learn to corporate or will they flunk? With the help of a quirky introvert and her friends help they might just get the help they need. 'Hinata's Tutoring Service' is coming to the rescue! Or… her service might totally stink and no progress will be made… but, that's like a 95 percent chance! So don't worry Sasuke and Naruto you're probably in kind of probably not capably hands! Rated T cuz someone won't shut their potty mouth!

When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice and leave the whole world wondering how you did it ~Anonyms

Crap!

Swiping yet another layer of eraser shavings of his paper. Naruto Uzamaki cursed and re-wrote the problem once again. If anything he was going to get this problem right you can believe that he thought.

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Sighing the blond erased his paper one more time. Maybe that stereo type blonds are dumb was true? Griping the worksheet he slid out of his chair. Screeching the floor loudly.

Eyes directed themselves towards him once again like the past few days silently laughing and ridiculing him. Narrowing his eyes he faced the class.

"What are you retards looking at?!" The classes stifled their laughter quickly and went back to their monotone scribbling on paper. Gritting his teeth the said blond walked towards the teacher's desk. Slamming his paper on the desk he looked anywhere but the silver haired teacher's one lecherous eye. "I need help."

Letting out and exaggerated breath the teacher spoke. "Oh really Naruto? This is the 7th time today and you still can't understand the first question? I'm sorry but, if you don't start hitting the books you'll have to repeat 12th grade."

Frowning the blond shook his head. "But, don't worry you're not in this boat alone." Raising his bronze eye brows he scratched his head. Suddenly another chair screeched and an ominous silence covered the room.

Sasuke Uchiha walked his way towards the teacher's desk stopping next to the blond. Sasuke slid his paper towards the perverted sensei. Kakashi then crossed his arms. "I still don't get it." Sasuke seethed turning to the side trying to avoid the smug smirk etched across the blonds face.

"Which one Sasuke?" Glaring out of the corner of his eye he balled his hands in a fist, a silent warning to Naruto. "Number 2." Sighing Kakashi stood up from his seat and reluctantly placed his 'Icha Icha Paradise 4 limited edition' down and ushered the two dolts out of the classroom into the hallway.

Closing the door behind him Kakashi faced the two.

Complete opposites but, the one thing they had in common? Failing Math. "Alright you two- Stopping mid-sentence to gain there attention from there glaring contest, he stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out two cards.

"As you know you're both failing advanced calculus, Naruto I don't even know how you got in this class, and Sasuke this is just straight up weird. Aren't Uchiha's supposed to be smart?"

Sasuke scoffed and shoved his hands in his pockets leaning on the wall while Naruto averted his eyes and scratched the back of his head.

"So I'll be giving you the number of my distant cousin Hinata. She has a small tutoring business to help her pay rent so it's a win-win." Instantly the two boys imagined a girl version of Kakashi making them shudder.

Handing them the cards Kakashi smirked under the mask. "Oh and if you don't call her by the end of today I'll drop your grade 40%!" Sasuke flew off the wall almost ready to stab the pervert Naruto right next to him. He really wished he was a super sayain so he could do a kamayhamayha on his ass.

The bell rang and Kakashi didn't miss a beat running back into the classroom. The two really looked like they wanted to rip his balls out or something.

"Kakashi really is a dick." Naruto growled shuffling his way towards his locker Advanced math was the last mod and he was ready to get out of school.

"I know." Sasuke was on FIRE slamming his locker open which happened to be next to the blonds. Grabbing his phone out of his black hoodie Sasuke threw his blue and white backpack over his shoulder. Naruto grabbed his navy blue bag and threw on his orange pullover hoodie over his green uniform shirt.

'"What does the card say." Sasuke asked more of commanded.

"Ummm…. Oh Hinata's tutoring service…. Blah blah blah…. Oh the number is 777-777-7778."(fake number do not call and expect to hear Hinata on the other line!)

Sasuke punched in the numbers and descended down the hallways Naruto to his right. Today was too hectic and he really just wanted to go home but, no their ass of a teacher decided to put them in unwanted tutoring then threaten to drop their grade if they didn't "accept" the offer. "Kakashi sucks."

Some where the said teacher sneezed and dropped his paper work everywhere.

"I know right!"

Another sneeze and Kakashi dropped his book losing the page.

"He's so annoying and nosey! I swear to god if I see his ass at night in an alleyway I would beat h- Sasuke whipped a hand over Naruto's mouth cutting his rant short.

"Shut up dobe she answered."


Hinata Hyuuga silently trudged her way to her car. She was tired. Practically dead.

Not only had she had a terrific day with being harassed by the u-g-l-y bitchKarin and her even bitcher group ofbitches that followed the bitch everywhere at school but, she also had to work after school at the café downtown during rush hour when her dumbass boss decide 'hey ima just let Hinata and some other bitch named Karin work those hours alone even though its rush hour and its obviously going to be packed.'

Yeah she'd defiantly quitting tomorrow.

And now, oh yes, now she had try to maneuver through traffic! Plus she wasn't even supposed to be driving!

Yes, poor sweet old Hinata surprisingly gets some serious road rage suddenly when she gets in any car.

Getting pulled over was not an option.

So she crossed her fingers and toes that no retarded ass motha fucker would not try to maneuver their way through or in front of her. Please. Cuz she is so willing to throw her coffee or French fries or salad or hamburger or whatever out her window at unsuspecting victims in a heartbeat, probably would throw the car two.

And after a good long hour and a half ride gripping her MacDonald's bag like a life line and counting to 1,738 just to calm herself down from cursing half the population out she made it to her apartment which she happened to share with her cousin who was currently at work. And, with relief Hinata Hyuuga turned back into the kind person we all know and love.

But fear in cars.

The young ex-heiress of Hyuuga ECCL (eye care contacts and lenses) sat down on her plush black sofa and slept.

For about three seconds.

Before some jackass decided to call her of all fine moments.

Reaching outward she read the number in the screen, not recognizing it she growled and flipped it open. "Hello Hinata Hyuuga s-speaking." She drawled out.

"Yeah umm your cousin Kakashi" Hinata sort of drone out for a sec. That little perverted pansy ass bitch. He basically ruined her nap.

"He must of given you my number for t-tutoring, U-um just give me a second to g-get a pen and paper.

"Ok."

Hinata indifferently rolled herself out of her warm and cozy sofa and slide her way on her stomach to her purse on the kitchen counter. She snatched the needed supplies and slinked her way back over not getting of her stomach the whole time.

The world wonders how she reached the counter while on the floor.

"Alright so since I'm fairly new in this b-business you can take me on any day you want after s-school weekends included." (A/N: eyebrow wiggle!)

Light chuckling was heard in the background and she raised a questioning brow.

" haha ehem… how about um… Naruto what do you think?" These guys were weird.

Suddenly there was shuffling and a few muffled curses made their way through the receiver. A now louder and brashier… if that's even a word? Voice entered the young Hyuuga's ears. Da faqu was wrong with them?

She really needed to stop hanging out with Hidan, his foul language was rubbing of on her… in her head.

"Ok we'll be there um… Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays!" She quickly scribbled down the days.

"Um… so your n-names are?" More muffled sounds came on the other end a high pitched squeal on the other end erupted through the phone. The voice from before came back on.

"Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzamaki" …. U-Z-A-M-A-K-I… isn't that the bitch's Karin's last name? "Alright well meet me tomorrow Saturday in K-Konoha's public library and we'll g-get started, I also i-introduce you to t-the rest of th-the crew. Have a nice day!"

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Hey… isn't Sasuke like …. Itatchi's younger brother. A blooming smirk crossed her face slightly scaring the crow on her window sill due to the fact such a sweet looking face shouldn't contort into such…. Creepy looking positions.

Flipping her phone open once again Hinata searched through her contacts till it landed on a certain name. She quickly called and waited patiently on the other end, all of her tiredness vanished.

"Hey what's up Hina yeah?"

"Hey Dei dei, the celling I gu-guess? A-anyway guess w-who just called me for the tutoring?"

"… I don't know yeah. Oh is it that guy un? Ya know the one with the bushy eyebrows hn?" She chuckled on the other end laughing slightly at the way he say's things.

"N-no but, I'll give you a hint yeah!" Hinata slightly mocked "He's an Uchiha!"

"Chibi Itachi yeah? Man I thought they were smart or something yeah! Wait till I tell Itachi hn!"

"But, just tell everyone to c-come to the library around the time school lets out tomorrow, Saturday ok oh, did I mention there's and Uzamaki coming t-too?"

"Eww… isn't that like the banshee Karin's last name yeah?

"My thought's t-to! I wonder what Hidan wo-would say?" She removed herself from her seat and paced her way over to the kitchen and pulled out a glass cup and milk carton.

"He'd probably say 'oh no not that ugly ass bitch I swear to Jashin I'll sacrifice her yeah!" Instantly milk spewed all over my fridge, toppling over the young Hyuuga gripped her stomach and laughed which of course led to her coughing up milk everywhere.

"Hey Hina un? You ok yeah?"

She stood up attempting to control her dorky giggles. "Yeah I-I'm ok… just that impersonation was spot o-on but, I'll have to call you later ok."

"Alright bye Hina yeah!"

Whipping her phone shut, standing up, and grabbing a rag she went over to her counter. Silently with thoughts on the morning the young Hyuuga wiped up the milk then went over to the couch once again.

"Tomorrow ought to be f-fun…"

Hinata plopped down on her now lukewarm couch, curling into herself.

For about 2 seconds before…

"HINATA! WHAT HAPPENED IN THE KITCHEN!?"

Yep she just was not the one today.

"NEJI SHUT THE HELL UP IM TRYING TO FLIPPIN SLEEP! NOW GO TAKE ONE OF YOUR FLIPPIN LONG AS SHOWERS WASH YOUR GIRLY ASS HAIR AND DON'T FORGET TO TAKE A PISS BECAUSE YOU REALLY NEED TO GET THAT STICK YOU GOT UP YOUR DICK A FUCKING BREATHER!"

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"Well then."

~Fin~

Alright YEAH! First chap done! Was it short? It sorta felt a little short to me… oh well. Anyway I'll probably update this every Friday so….ok. On a lighter note I think this was actually pretty fun to write! If anyone can guess what happened to Sasuke and Naruto on the other line review and tell! Come back Friday and find out who are these other people our sweet Hinata hangs out with 'I really hope you have all figured it out' oh an to clear up some possible questions on what grades everyone is in, Naruto and Sasuke are seniors and Hinata and a few of her 'buddies' are in collage 1st year, and then the rest of her 'buddies' are in collage 2nd year. Ok? ok! Oh and leave me a funny quote in the reviews and I'll put it at the begging of every chap… but you know if you guys don't then… yeah.

PLEASE REVIEW! :)