Found this floating around on my harddrive and decided to finish it rather than do my final essay that's due tomorrow. This also counts as Day 22 of the Major Crimes Season 3.5 Countdown challenge (I missed 23, but I promise I'll make it up to you!)
Some Mumma!Sharon and Ricky love.
The Judgement of Solomon
She walks him to the end of the check-in line, happy to have a free afternoon to see him off. So many times she has had to bid him farewell in the morning and hope he catches his flight okay. But today she drove him to the airport, and now stands next to him waiting for his flight to list as 'open'.
Ricky turns to her with a smile, and she grins back, but they both turn serious when Ricky shuffles on his feet.
"I, ah… I left a message for Dad. Told him I was leaving town today"
"Oh?"
She is pleased that Ricky is taking charge of his relationship with his father, but a part of her is still seething from their confrontation earlier in the week. She has forgiven Ricky – of course she has – but it still stings to think he was so easily persuaded by a simple word from his father. Did she not raise him? Was she not the sole provider his entire life? What, does he not trust her judgement after all this time?
But no matter. This is what she wanted, and if Ricky wants to see his father more often, then that's his choice to make.
"I haven't heard back"
And her heart breaks for him, because she is not the least bit surprised, but she can see that Ricky is hurt; hurt and disappointed that the brief reconnection was apparently only so Jack could influence him once again. She can only give him a sympathetic look and rub his arm in comfort. It wounds her to watch her children now learning the same lessons she did all those years ago.
Unexpectedly he pulls her into a firm embrace, and she is surprised but does not resist. He was always so affectionate, her boy, and she misses his hugs.
"I'm sorry, Mom" he whispers into her hair, his arms tight around her. She is still sometimes overwhelmed that he has to lean down to meet her, but there's something sweet about it too; something very grown up. But her eldest son is also such a child sometimes and so easily persuaded. Still looking for his father's love where he will never find it.
"Oh, my boy" she hums, pulling away. She places a tender hand on his cheek, her expression kind yet mirthful. All-knowing, like only a mother can be. "You are so smart" she says with immense pride. "So clever"
He looks pleased under her look, but knows what to expect. She has that look, like she's about to be brutally honest with him, and he knows he deserves it, so he doesn't interrupt her when she continues. "But you can also be proud" she warns. "And sometimes blind to people's true meaning"
She looks at him solidly and he nods slowly, his smile melting away as he takes on her meaning. He thinks back over this last visit, and the conversations he had with his father prior to arriving in L.A. They had been pleasant enough, but tainted in hindsight; all about Jack's own motives and agenda, and nothing at all about truly building a relationship with his son. It's that which hurts the most.
"You mean with Rusty" he states, knowing full well that Rusty is just the tip of the iceberg where Jack's manipulation is concerned. Sharon only nods with a serious look.
Because of the small size of her place they hadn't had much of an opportunity to discuss this, too afraid Rusty might overhear. It's not that Ricky dislikes the boy, he just knows so little about him, and she was not going to be put in a situation where Rusty walked in while she was spilling his secrets. So the rest of the week had been calm enough, and the boys got on well, but the initial fight went mostly unacknowledged. She doesn't want him to leave on a bad note, but if she doesn't say this now she never will.
"You were judging Rusty based on bad information…" she says. "And I think a bit of personal jealousy"
Ricky goes to object, but under The Look he relents; it is no secret he loves being her baby boy. Even he can admit that Rusty threatens that a little.
"But what I am really talking about here is your father" she adds, getting to the heart of the matter. And though he was prepared for it, Ricky still tries to jump in to defend himself, just as he always does when it comes to Jack.
"Now now, don't deny it to me. I'm your mother, I know you" she continues. They both grin just a little. She is right, of course. "I understand how important it is for you kids to have some form of relationship with him, regardless of how our marriage has turned out"
She pauses, eyes him critically. Takes in his height and his terrible haircut. Looks at her boy that is now a man, and decides that yes, he is most certainly old enough to hear this from her. It's about time she stopped wrapping her children in cotton wool and deluding herself.
"But you are not a child anymore, Ricky, and I think it's important you start to recognise the true person that he is"
He looks startled at her honesty. He also looks relieved. Perhaps this line of fire was long overdue.
"Like you did" he says, more statement than question. There is no accusation in his tone, only resigned understanding.
"Yes, like I did"
"You're telling me not to listen to Dad?" he asks, and this time sounds exasperated. All these years of forced phone calls and unbearable dinners and she wants to pull a 180-spin now? Because of some street rat with an attitude? But no, she's not so rash, and he stops himself from getting angry and forces himself to listen. Children lash out; adults face the facts. Maybe she's not the only one who has been seeing him through the lens of youth.
"I'm telling you" she says, a warning in her tone to watch his. "That… your father has a bad habit of manipulating… things… to best suit himself. And in this case, he manipulated you"
Ricky nods. He knows this, now. He is beginning to understand. But it doesn't make his father's fall from the pedestal any easier to watch. So many swords below.
Sharon sighs, and runs her hand up and down his arm again, softening. "Honey, mostly what I'm saying is… take everything he says with a grain of salt. He has broken many promises to a lot of different people"
She won't tell him today about the many lies Jack told behind Ricky's own back; that he didn't work late very often; that he wasn't traveling to close a big deal; that he was going to be there at Christmas. That was a conversation for another day. Or perhaps it went without saying, she wasn't sure.
"Don't let any petty sibling rivalry blind you to the real truth here"
Ricky looks thoughtful, and uncertain all of a sudden. He hugs her again, just to let her know that he's okay, that they are okay, and that he won't leave in a bad mood. He feels her sigh against him – whether from relief or just emotional exhaustion he can't tell, but his mind runs over the many years he watched his mother do this all on her own, and an uncomfortable truth settles over him, something he's known for some time and never had the courage to face. He pulls back but keeps his hands cupping her shoulders.
"Dad's not a very nice person… is he?"
She looks sad for him. "You father is flawed. As are we all. I just don't want you to get hurt by his mistakes"
Ricky nods, and hugs her again. She rubs his back in comfort. They at least will be okay.
"I love you" he says, pulling back.
"I love you too" she replies. She almost gets teary on him, but laughs at herself instead, which immediately breaks the tension. "And I am so proud of you"
Above them the board flicks his flight from red to green and he steels his shoulders, picking up his duffel. They step into the line proper, and she time to stay with him all the way to the first check-point today.
"So tell me" she says, her voice light and airy again, their conversation seemingly over. "What do you want for Christmas?"
And he laughs. Christmas seems so far away, but she always does this. So he launches into the specifications of a computer system on his dream list, and they make fun of each other over the complete lack of comprehension. She tells him to stop being a smart-arse, and he counters that she loves that about him.
It will be a different Christmas this year. They all plan on being in town together – even Jack, if he hasn't taken off again before then – and this adoption business looks set to go ahead, so who knows what their family will look like by the end of the year. It feels like both an end and a beginning. But he's learning that it's all part of growing up, this change of the seasons. And he realises, as he waves at his mother from behind the first checkpoint, that whether he likes it or not he has to keep up with the times or risk following his father down a path of self-denial.
He thinks he just might be able to adapt. After all, he has his mother at his back and now a sibling on each side; they won't let him down.
