Strange Bits of Happiness

Title- Panties

Pairing- Natsu x Lucy

Summary- Natsu takes tips from Happy. It does not work out.

A/N- I've decided to write a series of drabbles/oneshots because the stories that I'm writing are too short to be one shots, but too long to be drabbles, so I don't know what to do with them. The stories will mostly centre around Natsu x Lucy but later on they may also include other pairings and characters. And I have given the title 'Strange Bits of Happiness' to this set of drabbles/oneshots because I hope that, after reading these stories, you will have a big s-m-i-l-e on your face :)
Anyways, here's the first drabble/oneshot.

Enjoy!

-X-

Two figures emerged from the deepening twilight. One had a scarf billowing in the wind while the other, oddly, was floating in the air. The two silhouettes appeared to be engaged in a deep, philosophical conversation, judging from tones of their voices.

"Hey Natsu, what are you giving Lucy? It's her birthday tomorrow, you know."

"I know…..but I don't know what to give her. Something safe. I don't wanna wake up one fine morning without any arms or legs!"

"Yeah, Lucy can beat Erza when it comes to scariness if she wants to."

"Yeaahh….she's a weirdo alright…What do you think I should give her?"

"You should give her a pair of new panties- since you burned her old ones."

"P-panties?"

"Yeah. What if she notices the charred bits of cloth in her drawer? What if she's mourning her old and beloved panties, which you so conveniently burned a few days ago?"

"It was an accident! I didn't mean to!"

"And you know how weird Lucy is when it comes to her clothing, Natsu."

"Sshhhhh!"

They both looked around fearfully, expecting something- or someone- to jump out of the bushes and ambush them. They surveyed the area with wary eyes.

Nothing happened.

They both sighed, relieved that the danger of imminent death had passed. Then the taller figure began to reprimand the odd flying one:

"You idiot! What if Lucy- or worse, Erza- had heard us? They would have eaten us for breakfast!"

"I don't think that I taste really good, Natsu."

There was a grunt. "So you think I should give Lucy some…panties?"

"Aye! We can make up for the fact that we didn't even hold a funeral for her poor burnt panties."

"Panties have funerals too?"

"Aye! How else do you think they go to heaven?"

There was a short silence, while the figure receiving counsel pondered upon this piece of advice. Then:

"That's a great idea Happy! I'm all fired up now!"

"Aye!"

-X-

The saleswoman who had a morning shift in the lingerie section of the clothes department of the supermarket had a very peculiar morning indeed. She was a very experienced saleswoman- having been in this field for about six years- but never in her life had she ever encountered a costumer like him before.

He bounded into the clothes department- and promptly began to yell about some panties. It took her a while to understand that he wanted to go to the lingerie section.

He said that he wanted to buy some panties for his girlfriend. Pray, what kind of a guy buys underwear for his girlfriend? she thought, but her job was to help costumers- even unusual ones like him- and she did exactly that.

It turned out to be more challenging than expected.

He examined the various shelves in that section- while the surrounding women gave him all sorts of looks, ranging from awkward looks to embarrassed looks to angry looks, but the majority of them were giving him uncomfortable looks. She couldn't blame them. She was feeling quite uncomfortable herself.

The strange thing was that the man himself was utterly oblivious to the awkwardness of the women around him.

After spending a l-o-n-g time studying different underwear and contemplating with his blue cat whether to buy purple panties or pink ones- which made her cringe- he finally chose a pair.

The panties were the same colour as his hair- she noted with some amusement- as she went to the cashier and told her to gift-pack the flimsy set of clothing.

She silently wished the man good luck as he walked out of the automatic doors, looking insanely pleased with himself.

-X-

"Happy Birthday Luce!"

"Natsu! You remembered!"

"Well, of course, weirdo. Anyways, here's your present."

Happy hung onto every word as he floated outside Lucy's apartment. He had, after all, given Natsu the utterly brilliant idea of gifting the blonde a pair of panties- and he wanted to witness Lucy's reaction. Then he could go and brag to everyone in the guild about the depth of his ingenious plan.

He heard Lucy squeal. "Wow, you got me a gift! What is it?"

"You'll have to open it and see for yourself."

Happy inched closer to the window so that he could see what was going on.

There was a tearing sound as Lucy ripped off the wrapping paper, and then looked into the box eagerly.

"NATSU! WHAT THE HECK IS THIS!?"

"I-It's a pair of panties."

Happy winced as Lucy shrieked, "A PAIR OF PANTIES! WHAT KIND OF A DOOFUS GIVES A GIRL PANTIES!?"

"But you needed some, didn't you?"

"Well, yes- NO! WHAT AM I SAYING! I DID NOT NEED THEM!"

Natsu smirked, which Happy thought wasn't exactly the safest gesture to make, and said, "See, you needed some- OUCH!"

There was a loud thud as Lucy's fist made contact with the side of Natsu's head.

Happy winced again- and then spun around and flew off, whistling as if he hadn't got a care in the world.

-X-

Well?

For the people who have alerted Tact- I'm really glad that you liked my story and alerted it so that you could read more, but sadly Tact is a one shot… :(

Oh, and before I forget, reviews please! Your reviews inspire me to write more :D