There's a lot of things that can be said, done and thought. And there are a lot of things that can be forbidden, forgotten and hidden away. There are also things that not everyone can get. Especially the rituals. Sabaku no Daichi had been to every village in his whole life. He saw how people prayed to images, how they worshipped animals and how they feared of different. He saw girls wearing special color to their weddings and special jewelry to their divorces just to bring luck or get away from the bad demons. He saw many of them and he hadn't believed in any. It's not because he was a heretic. He just had his own beliefs.
Suna was no different from others. In the rituals of Suna, he was the son of the Sun, descendant of gods, the closest to the sky that was merciless and cruel – and thus, made him merciless and cruel to match his deities. Every year there were prays and matches for the one and only river in the village to come out of the banks and flood the dry sands. It was a mercy. It was also a show he had a heart. 'Do you wish to say something, Kazekage-sama?' 'No.' he mutters as one of his soldiers gives him wooden scepter and material crown. The crowd cheers for him and his golden clothes, his henna make up, his beautiful godly profile. He looks at them, brown skin, dark hair and all he sees is vultures.
And it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because the river did not come out of the banks this year, nor a year before, not three, five, twelve years ago. He looks down at his children, his two sons and a daughter who do not love him and who fear him only because he is higher than them, but not stronger. It also doesn't matter. He looks out into the sky and even if it's endless, it's closed for his eyes. Only blue. And it's his fault.
It's because of him, because he doesn't care, it's because of him because he doesn't tell the river to flood, because he don't tell the sun to go down. It's because of his suffering people suffer, because he is merciless and cruel. Because he was a god, and one day he met a human. It was blonde, blue-eyed and sweet with laughter so sweet it's unforgettable. He saw the boy long time ago, on his journey over the world, somewhere, somewhen from his heavenly throne up above. They do not know each other and they never did, their eyes never met and their words never sounded in the empty room. He is a god and then he Is a human and humans see only other humans. Blue-eyed boy laughs only for the sweet strawberry girl from far away.
And that's enough for him to let go of the sky, the earth and the river, his life dull, small, meaningless. He yearns for human and it's a never-ending story. He yearns for mortal to become immortal and it's a never-ending wish. But he is a god, and his wishes do come true. Only some gods are not worshipped, that's why the rise and the fall of the blonde god is quick and he never has a chance to blink. Even gods die sometime. Or maybe because some gods were never gods to begin with. And when he sees the bodies, massacred, hidden in coffins and buried in earth, he hangs his head low, giving up, forgiving, forgetting. Mortals can't become gods. Mortals don't live forever. And then, he doesn't live for anything anymore.
The days pass, the crowd gets smaller and smaller, nobody loves him strong enough as he doesn't love people back, making the earth dry from yearning, the sky empty from pain and air hot from jealousy for gods that were more powerful. And when the last one of his worshippers die, he steps out of his throne and looks at the crowd of vulture. His history ends here, a long time after he lost his ideas, even longer after he lost his powers. His story ends here, in the wooden coffin where he wears his golden clothes and wooden scepter. His history ends here, an immortal sacrifice for mortals who have enough of his legend. And as the fire licks at his feet and as the crowd chooses another god for their ruler, he vanishes, along with the rain, the memory, the being.
And when he opens his eyes and hears the laughter again, for the first time in years he smiles. Finally, he reaches his eternity.
