A/N :

Dear Readers,

As a tribute to Valentine's Day, we're celebrating this Week Of Love by taking part in a challenge, called "fanofthisfiction's Show Me The Love Challenge." This is a challenge that was first introduced by my friend and fellow writer "Fanofthisfiction" as a part of Fanfiction Review Movement, whereby readers and authors pay by reviewing the fanfics they love.

Not only me but there are many other talented authors out there taking part in the challenge, so you may want to check their works as well (different genres and fandoms) : bingbin, een nihc, fanofthisfiction, fricasee, Fxreflies, ibloo, Kaze and Kiba, Lady Rini, Lady The Warrior, mississippimudpiecraves, misspandalily, Pixie07, Poodie, rainyrhapsody, RushiAei, Sakura's Unicorn, Tuvstarr's lost heart, Unicorn Paige, wingedmercury, yara9292, and YenGirl

This is a 5 chapter story, hopefully going to be finished before Feb 17, Don't Forget to Review!


Ch01

The broken Lightsaber was resting in her lap. It had been six hours now that Rey had locked herself in a room. Isolated from everybody else. She said she wanted to rest but sleep was out of the question. Not that she wasn't tired but there was a lot on her mind. She was restless, all sort of thoughts swirling in her brain. A lot of unsaid words and alternative options. It was hard not thinking about him. She had to busy herself somehow or else she was going to go crazy. That's why she picked up the pieces, knowing next to zero about laser swords didn't help much and here she thought she was good at fixing broken things. All her life, she was scavenging through the desert, finding pieces of trash, sometimes keeping them, cleaning them and putting them together. Now though… she was at lost.

The feeling was new to her. Complicated. But that was probably the result of all the other feelings piled up on her heart. Of course, the recent scratch of a memory, coming from the Lightsaber wasn't at all distracting. She was just unable to focus. Flickering through the Jedi texts, she ought to find some tips about fixing a Lightsaber. It couldn't be that hard. She was now supposed to be a Jedi. The thought turned her stomach. It was foreign, unfamiliar… surreal. It sounded wrong, she wasn't supposed to be the last Jedi. She wasn't these people's last hope. But people looked up to her as some sort of an intergalactic heroine … and it was… it was all too much.

Sighing in frustration, Rey let go of the metallic pieces of the Lightsaber, leaving them on the ground as she started pacing across the room. She used to feel alone now though it wasn't just loneliness. She'd never felt this burdened before. She could barely hold on.

"I can't be what they want…" She whispered to the empty room. Suddenly feeling this urge to let go of everything and run somewhere far far away. Something stung in her chest as she remembered the throne room. She tried so hard to forget it, waving it as a passing thought. But she couldn't. She just had to ask herself, was that what Ben always felt? She didn't know. In that moment when he stood there, hand stretched to her, she was so drawn in thinking about saving her friends, she didn't even try to comprehend his feelings. Rejecting Ben, going for the Lightsaber… it was the right decision, wasn't it? It felt so right in that moment now though –

Her eyes diverted back to the two pieces, she wasn't so sure anymore. And the worse thing was that she couldn't even talk to anyone about this. It tugged at her heart again, the feeling of loneliness and loss. She sought answers and there was no one there to provide her any. Not even…Ben.

She shook her head at the thought like it was a forbidden, bad idea. He was their enemy. It was getting more obvious by second that he'd fallen too far to be saved. Rey tried to convince herself that it was too late, that not everyone could be saved but… but the look, he'd given her, the last time the Force connected them— his eyes were so different.

Like the Lightsaber, broken into pieces.

Gingerly she walked to where she'd left them on the floor, sitting cross-legged and holding the pieces. Perhaps if only she could talk to him again, he would understand why she'd done it.

But it wasn't possible anymore.

With Snoke gone, there was no way they would be connected again. Perhaps that was for the better, she thought, disappointed and digging into her toolbox, picking out a screwdriver, she started unscrewing the back of the metallic halt. She didn't need to see him, not after all he said. In another battle perhaps, they had to face each other, she thought bitterly, her chest tightening, her heart aching.

Her fingers stopped fiddling with the sword, suddenly her breath hitched and for a split second, she thought her heart even stopped beating at the sudden connection. Her eyes immediately shot up to look at the lone silhouette at the far end of the room.

"Ben…" The words came out unconsciously. His back was faced to her. wearing all black, his hands clasped together behind his back. Rey swallowed thickly. It was so good to see— no… it was weird to see him again.

"Why is the force still connecting us?" Rey asked, trying to sound reluctant but she was curious. He didn't flinch. As if he was only a statue. Not even breathing. Rey rubbed her eyes to see if she was just seeing things or he was really there, like a ghost, haunting her. Slowly standing up, she walked to him, standing a few feet away as he finally let

out a deep breath.

"You betrayed me—" The hoarse, tired voice had had to belong to him, confirming that she wasn't dreaming. But the tone… it sounded familiar, when he called Luke the first time, she could feel the same vulnerability in his voice. Of course, he felt that way.

Rey hung her head, trying to swallow a cry. " I didn't. " Her answer was firm but not very certain.

"You did… " he finally turned, looking behind the shallow eyes as he hadn't had slept in days. A part of her knew why. "You wanted to kill me. " He spat the words, fury slowly crawling up to his throat and the veins on his neck popping out.

She wanted to say that was because they were still enemies and nothing had changed and he was still a heartless monster but no… it wasn't the truth. And she didn't want to hurt him further. "My friends were in danger. " She finally said, her face a mixture of regret and uncertainty that she couldn't hide.

"You called the lightsaber—" Ben continued as if he couldn't even hear her, eyes now softening, the recent fury only a shadow behind his eyes, he was also curious as to why. Visions of the First Order shooting at the Resistance fleet, clouded her mind. She thought she had Ben, that he was going to help her stop them from firing but no… she was flustered, she was angry.

"The First Order was destroying their ship. They were dying. " She answered a little louder than she intended to, her muscle tensing up, she looked away from him.

"You would do that… " He said softly, taking a step to her. " After all those visions that we've seen… you would still kill me… " He thought he was stating some facts like he knew what was going on in

her confused mind. Hell, even she didn't know what she was thinking and here he acted like he knew everything.

She wondered if she knew how to reply. that It was all pure instinct in that moment. She didn't even know what to do with the Lightsaber if it ever ended up in her hands, would she truly kill him?

"I wouldn't. " She looked up, her bright brown eyes locked with his dark ones. There was no anger left in them. There was only sadness. Rey could see the pain he held inside, just blazing in his dark brown eyes.

"Why?" He looked so defeated, so pained as he gazed at her, trying to mask his emotions, trying to keep her out but oh… didn't he know how he was just pulling her in?

She was lost in feelings she knew didn't belong to her and despite herself; she took a step closer to him. "Why what?" She asked like he once asked her and saw him retreating, clenching and unclenching his fist.

"Why did you fight with me?" He asked, genuinely confused.

She ought to know the answer. She remembered the forest. All the hatred and anger after witnessing Han Solo's murder, she still felt the tinge of that. But not like before, not with him in her head. "Because I thought you would turn, you should have—" She straightened her posture, a look of confidence on her face but it soon was replaced with something else. "Why didn't you come with me?"

Faded amusement, playing in his eyes. " And what if I'd come?" He snorted, "You're naïve, thinking there is a difference between light and dark," Then again the cold, stone-hard face came back as he deadpanned, "There isn't. "

"I will only protect my friends," Rey felt her eyes stinging and Ben's image became blurry. She swallowed again, frowning.

"Your friends will disappoint you—" Ben stated calmly, his voice soothing like a lullaby but the words he said, cut like blades. "Just like your parents."

He was doing it again, just like the throne room. It wasn't like that he couldn't fathom the depth of her grief, it was just that he was well aware of that and it hurt him too, she could see it destroying him from the inside yet, he still fiddled with the wound, causing it to hurt even more. A tear ran on her cheek, as she remembered the forest, how he tried to numb the wound in his side. Through pain.

"Stop it…" She murmured as he widened his eyes as if he couldn't really comprehend what she just said. " Please Ben—" Her voice weak and almost inaudible. "You talk about letting go of the past but you're the one who is holding on to it… you are the one who can't forget—"

"The only way is to kill it all." Ben interrupted, the words hanging in the air above them as she nodded.

"No—" She said, " You know that's not true." It didn't work. It never worked. Han was still haunting him, Luke too.

The silence that followed was deafening. Ben didn't reply and he supposedly wasn't even thinking because she didn't hear anything. It was just void and a force so strong, swirling inside and out of them. She decided it was no use now, staring at him and waiting. That's why she took a step back and finally turned on her heels and went to where she'd left the pieces of Lightsaber on the ground.

"I need to fix this—"She shook her head looking for the screwdriver, " I don't know how though. The metal container is completely useless, I can't seem to fix it and even if I do, I don't know if it's going to be strong enough to contain the gem's energy."

It took a while before Ben takes a step and then several to her, gazing at the Lightsaber and then at her before sitting down cross-legged in front of her. " Have you ever built a Lightsaber before? " He asked almost rhetorically.

Rey frowned, looking skeptical. " No, but I used to build my own weapons."

"This isn't going to work," He pointed at the broken halt, disappointed." You're going to need a new halt, a blade emitter shroud, and emitter matrix." He tilted his head, looking inside the broken piece and taking a glance at the broken crystal, he raised his dark eyebrows. "It's broken."

"Yeah," Rey replied weakly before clearing her throat. "But there needs to be a way to fix it."

Ben didn't reply immediately, his eyes were focused on the hilt and for the first time, he didn't even raise a finger to try and take if from her. He was deep in thought, carefully examining the problem at hand. And she saw him for the first time, not angry, not frustrated or disappointed or lost but he looked thoughtful, calm and confident. It was strange she felt at ease being in his presence, just like that night in the cave, when she felt his compassion. She tried not to stare but it was hard to keep her hands away from his wavy dark black locks.

"With the cracked crystal your blade would be unstable and dangerous," He ran a hand through his hair and pushed them back. "You need to build a hilt so it would project a blade from both ends."

She perked at that, smiling widely. "Like a staff… a uh… " putting a finger on her bottom lip, she continued. " Like a Saberstaff."

"Yeah." His eyes now reading right into hers. It was weird, wishing that it was all different. He was supposed to be here, with his mother and everyone else. Perhaps then he could even teach her, let her know of the different ways to the force and how to fight like a real warrior.

"I'm sorry." She caught him off guard. "I'm sorry you had to go through all that. " It wasn't pitiful but understanding and real and as much as Ben hated someone, especially her, bring out his vulnerability. He couldn't help but stay still, till she was finished. "This place… " She waved her hand in the air, they were still in the falcon but she didn't have to say it out loud, " You're a part of it." surely they were going to work it out, Ben was still general Leia's son and no matter what crimes he'd committed, he could be redeemed and forgiven.

"No." She watched him shaking his head like he was trying to get rid of some kind of a bad idea. "I know what you're thinking. It's not going to be easy." He got on his feet, stepping back.

"But I'll help you." Rey mimicked his movements, standing up, taking a step closer but he looked away. The tension building up in him.

"You can't." taking a deep breath, he finally looked at her. Cold, dark eyes returning and suddenly he was Kylo Ren again. "No one can."

And with that he was gone, leaving her with a dry throat and eyes that stung and heart that was tearing her chest apart. Why did she care? Her eyes stumbled back on the Lightsaber. Why would she even want him to come back?


A/N: So listen I'm not an expert in making a lightsaber, okay? So I just looked into wikipedia and added a bunch of info I don't even know what it is.

This process of making a lightsaber is still going on, so please tune in lol.

Hope you enjoyed, favorite and follow and review

See you around,

Cheers,

Bella