A/N -

There have been no updates on Johto Journeys for quite some time. This has been due to work, school, writer's block, etc. Also, we decided to rewrite it to include a better time frame. Instead of trainers randomly wandering around all year/all their lives, they now have a time limit to complete the gym and league challenge. All will become clear.

As this is a complete rewrite, there is no need to read Johto Journeys first. Much of Johto Journeys has been incorporated into this new version of the story, so a lot of the scenes are the same. However, there are some changes and many additions.

As always, we disclaim. We do not own Pokémon, as much as we wish we did...

I have included some links on our profile about deviantart/livejournal. Click if you are interested.

Please, read and review.


(BEFORE)

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock.

Kaida was tapping her pencil incessantly on the desk. Her leg drummed restlessly in rhythm, yet she was unaware of her actions, instead focusing her green eyes on the large, silver clock hanging above the head of her science teacher. Beside her sat her best friend, Nila, whose right eye twitched in annoyance at the short, red haired girl's antics. Kaida was supposed to be helping her with the 'fun' science test that their teacher had assigned them for the last lesson of term but, instead, Kaida's concentration was shattered by thoughts of the upcoming events of the next few days. Nila had quickly realised her friend was a lost cause, and she would have to complete the measuring out of the so-called forensic evidence by herself, but it didn't mean Kaida was supposed to distract her too.

"Well," the teacher's voice chimed out over the classroom. "Have you found the culprit? Two more minutes."

Nila elbowed Kaida sharply. Kaida jolted and her chin, previously resting on the hand Nila had jogged, fell and landed with a crack on the desk. She yelped, straightened up in her stool, and rubbed her red jaw indignantly. Nila just glared.

"What were we even doing?" Kaida asked, returning to the present for the moment to examine the workspace. "Something about finding powder on the body...?"

"Simple particle analysis ruled out granulated sugar, which is crystalline," Nila explained. "Then I tested solubility to rule out flour, and, finally," she grumbled, "I was allowed to use the flame test, which would solve it in about two seconds."

Kaida's eyes had reverted to the clock. Nila gave up and muttered something about irritating best friends and patronising school teachers. Kaida ignored her, half because she was used to Nila's complaints about being treated like she had the mental age of a four year-old, and half because she so more excited about the next few days – months – that she couldn't bring herself to pretend to care for even a second. It would be this weekend that they were finally old enough to compete in the summer Pokémon League tournament. School ended on Friday – that very day – and the gyms opened on Monday. However, more importantly, at the weekend, they would receive their starter Pokémon. As they lived in New Bark Town, Johto, they were traditionally given the choice of Chikorita, Cyndaquil, and Totodile.

Chikorita, Cyndaquil, or Totodile? The choice was obvious for Kaida. She had wanted a Cyndaquil ever since she could remember. She had watched Professor Elm hand out Pokémon year after year and she knew that she had to have a Cyndaquil. She would get up extra early to ensure that she was near the front of the queue and could obtain her desired Pokémon at all costs. Nila had already dashed her ideas of camping outside the lab that night by threatening to tell her mother because she thought Kaida was being stupid. But how could Kaida help herself? Ah, Cyndaquil. So sweet and fiery and cute… She just couldn't wait! Waiting meant enduring the hellish last days of school, dragging out like decades, with pointless end of term assignments, exam and essay hand backs, and Nila grousing when she got anything under ninety percent, like the giant freak she was.

"Nila, have you found the answer?"

"Yes, Mr Dutton," Nila said in a tone that clearly expressed her extreme boredom. "B."

Quite a few heads had cocked their ears in her direction.

"Nila!" Mr Dutton snapped. "Not everyone else was finished!"

Nila rolled her brown eyes. "Pity."

Mr Dutton was about to open his mouth to reprimand her again when, from across the room, Chris Brown let out a whoop of triumph, "Mr Dutton keeps naughty books in his drawer!"

Chris had sneaked up to the desk and opened several of the drawers, emptying the contents onto the table and the floor. He sat in the teacher's chair, with his feet on the table, and was thumbing through it. Mr Dutton rushed to his side and his face turned a shocking shade of red. He blustered for a moment before snatching it away.

"This is most certainly not mine," he insisted. "Chris, go back to your seat."

Smirking, the boy let his feet fall heavily to the ground before sloping to the back of the classroom.

"Tidy up!" Mr Dutton ordered. His face was still furiously red.

"But we haven't shared the results yet!" Kitty Young said. Her blue eyes were shockingly wide at the thought of not confirming her answers.

"It's B," Kaida said, quite eager to pack and leave. "Nila says so."

Kitty gave both Kaida and Nila a dirty look and looked back at their teacher eagerly. "Well?"

"It was B," Mr Dutton said, coughing. "Now, please, tidy up your equipment."

There was a nasty, shrieking sound as students pushed back their stools, the legs scraping on the floor. They washed out their test tubes, returned the powders, and tidied all their equipment away. Kaida almost dropped and smashed several beakers in her haste to finish so they could leave. Nila grabbed them from her just in time and instructed her to put the wide, goofy goggles and the tattered aprons away instead: she would have a difficult time breaking any of those. They had just finished when the school bell rang and several people cheered at the sound of it.

"All right then," Mr Dutton said wearily. "Have a good summer. Go."

"You too, sir," Chris Brown said, winking. He was almost at the door when he called back, "And bring us back some more of that reading material!"

"Chris!" Mr Dutton yelled, but Chris was already gone.

Kaida grabbed Nila's arm, ignoring her friend's attempts to get free, and dragged her through the door and into the crushing crowd in the corridor. Nila soon released escape attempts were futile and started to help Kaida along. Helping, of course, consisted of jamming elbows into the sides of any person squishing them as they shuffled their way to the exit. The noise in the corridor was, naturally, an excited babble: summer was beginning, and with this came not only freedom from school, but Pokémon. Kaida's gleeful thoughts were filled with plans of Cyndaquil and battling and training. She'd only be a rookie, and so not expected to go far, but she wouldn't let that stop her! She and Nila had been obsessed since birth: they knew everything necessary to become amazing trainers.

They emerged from the building to the sunny skies over New Bark Town. Kaida hurried down the steps, eager to get away from the school, but she was jostled from behind and ended up falling rather spectacularly down the steps, bowling over a girl with long, shining blonde hair. Kaida groaned and pulled herself off the girl, apologising briefly before checking her knees. She could hear Nila laughing at the top of the steps but Kaida ignored her as she poked the fabric on her legs; she had torn straight through her tights. Oops. She glanced over to the other girl, about to check she was all right, when she realised who it was. The other girl made the same realisation at the same time, and shrunk back away from her.

"Eew. Kaida!" Mary-Ann yelled. "You giant, clumsy oaf."

This made Nila burst out into more laughter at the thought of anyone calling Kaida a giant. Kaida, on the other hand, glared up at her friend; this was the support she received when faced with her rival! She turned her back on Nila and glared at Mary-Ann.

"It wasn't my fault," she objected. "I said I'm sorry!"

Mary-Ann glared back and both girls were relentless in the scowling expressions for a moment. Then Mary-Ann snorted and tossed her head. She whipped around, her long hair hitting Kaida in the face, and stalked off. Kaida swore quite loudly as Nila ambled down the steps to stand beside her.

"You're always so much help," Kaida said resentfully.

Nila shrugged. "It's funny."

Nila was now on the receiving end of Kaida's glares. Unfortunately for Kaida, she was immune. Instead she rolled her eyes and said, "Let's go home."

Kaida and Nila lived in houses adjacent to each other, and had done since Nila's family had moved to New Bark Town when she was four. They had been best friends since they had met and had been involved in an argument over which Eevee evolution was the coolest. Kaida had argued for Flareon, Nila for Umbreon, and it had ended in tears as Kaida had whacked Nila over the head with a plastic spade and Nila retaliated by pushing Kaida in the pond. They had been separated for about a week but, after that, managed to play quite amicably. They had also formed an alliance against Nila's elder brother, Connor, and his friend, Charlie. Now, at fourteen, Connor had somewhat grown up and no longer tormented them; the same was not true for Charlie.

"Kaida!" A loud voice boomed and, from Nila's doorway, a blond head merged. "Nila!"

"Oh," Nila said flatly. "It's you."

Charlie bounded towards her and grabbed her in a rib crushing hug, lifting her clear off the ground. "You love me really!" he cried, receiving only a demand to let her go and then, when this was ignored, a harsh kick in the shins. He dropped her swiftly. "Ow! You're a menace!" He turned on Kaida next, his eyes lighting up. "Kaida!"

"No you don't!" Kaida attempted to run but failed and was scooped up by the tall boy. "You're hurting me!"

Charlie did drop her a second after that, to his credit, but Kaida still gave him the nastiest look she could muster when he put her down. He grinned cheerfully down at her, completely disregarding her sullen face, and then ran back into the house yelling, "Quick, Connor will eat all the muffins!"

Well, Kaida wouldn't say no to a muffin. She followed him in while Nila ducked into the bathroom. Kaida chucked her schoolbag in the hallway and walked into the kitchen, where all that was on display was a bowl of fruit. Where were the muffins? She took one look at Charlie, who was leaning casually against the counter, and realised that, if there ever were any muffins, they were long gone.

"Loser!" Charlie taunted. "Maybe if you liked electricity instead of fire, you'd be a bit quicker!"

This made little sense, but it was a common quarrel between them.

"What is your obsession with fire anyway?" Charlie pulled a mock disgusted face. "It's so lame."

Kaida puffed up her small chest in indignation. "Fire is not lame! Fire is awesomely powerful! It can beat your stupid electric Pokémon any day!"

"How can you even say that?" Charlie demanded. "Think of what electricity has done for us! It runs your household appliances. Do you want to live in a cave?"

Kaida blustered. "Well, if you were in a cave, at least you could light a fire," she retorted. "We wouldn't have developed all the fancy electric stuff if we had frozen to death in the winter!"

Charlie scoffed, waving a dismissive hand at her. "Pfft. Times have moved on. Electricity is way forwards! Think of the awesome power of lightning in a storm. The roar of thunder and the flash of light!" His eyes glazed over. "It's incredible."

"A nice warm, cosy fire," Kaida riposted. "Fire is way better."

"No way!"

The next few minutes only comprised of the most base arguments, including, "is not" and "is too." They were only snapped out of their fight by a rustling sound as a round Pokémon sped out from behind two large backpacks. The Pokémon, a Voltorb, rolled around Charlie's legs, a wide grin on its polished surface. Kaida's eyes moved over to the backpacks and back to Charlie.

"You're going today?" she asked. Then, childishly, she added, "That's cheating!"

The gyms didn't officially open until Monday, but many trainers actually would set out before then, especially if they lived in a place like New Bark, which had no gyms.

"They're going to Hoenn," Nila explained, appearing behind Kaida. "They've got to get their boat."

"Ooh," Kaida said happily. "Does that mean we're free from then for the whole summer holiday?"

"Pretty much," Nila said. She wasn't smiling but she still looked pleased.

"I'm hurt," Charlie claimed, clutching his heart. "Really hurt."

"We don't care," Kaida and Nila chorused.

Voltorb giggled at this and rammed into Charlie's legs. Charlie almost fell over and, because Nila and Kaida laughed, Voltorb decided to do it again. Charlie jumped out of the way just in time, leaving his Pokémon to smack into the wall instead. It bounced back easily enough but rolled around, a little dazed, while Charlie lectured it on being a traitor.

"Charlie ate all the muffins," Kaida said, taking the opportunity while the older boy was distracted to complain to Nila. "He's such a fatty!"

Nila narrowed her eyes. While Charlie was distracted with Voltorb, she walked over to the fridge and rooted around for Charlie's favourite toffee yoghurt, which her Mum had especially bought for him. It was an enormous pot, so she grabbed two spoons and Kaida and Nila slunk upstairs to finish it off.

"He gets our muffins," Nila said, "then we get his yoghurt."

"Mm," Kaida mumbled in agreement. It was very good yoghurt indeed!

Nila's room had dark blue carpet and walls and was adorned with various Pokémon posters. Most of the featured Pokémon were dark, including several of Nila's all time favourite, Umbreon, as well as Sneasel, Tyranitar, and one Kaida could appreciate, Houndour. Kaida didn't like the poster of the colossal Tyranitar: she always felt it was watching her. That day, Tyranitar was partially blocked by the large bag on top of Nila's chest-of-drawers; this was stuffed to the brim with all the necessary items for their upcoming journey. Kaida had had hers packed for ages, all in eager anticipation for her journey. She had stocked up with Pokéballs, dried food, tenting equipment, and all of her clothes. It was always better to travel in groups, she thought, as she and Nila could share many things, like their tent, giving them less to carry.

Kaida's brow wrinkled as a thought struck her. "Do you have–"

"Yes."

"And–"

"Yes."

"Even–"

"YES."

"OK," Kaida said meekly. But then... "Ooh, and–"

Nila threw her spoon at Kaida's head.

Once they had scraped the pot clean, they took it back downstairs and made sure Charlie, now pouring over a giant map on the kitchen table with Connor, caught a good look. At first it didn't register but then he gasped and pointed a shaking hand at them.

"My yoghurt!" he cried.

"It's my house," Nila said triumphantly.

This didn't stop Charlie's outrage. "Your Mum got that for me especially!"

Connor, beside his friend, gave a small, longsuffering sigh at the squabble between his sister and best friend, and went promptly back to examining the map. It was of Hoenn, and Connor seemed to be finalising their plans. Hoenn was quite a difficult region to navigate, and there was no practical route to take that would allow a trainer to reach the all the gyms quickly and logically. Connor clearly didn't want to get behind, since he only had the summer holidays to complete his gym challenges. He was a Pokémon prodigy, Kaida thought, since he had managed to defeat all the gym leaders in his first year of training, and had managed to get into the top sixteen of the Silver Conference. It wasn't unheard of, but it was extremely rare. Kaida was determined that she and Nila would do just as well.

Charlie and Connor left for New Bark's small port shortly after dinner. Kaida stayed over to watch the battling channel with Nila for a while but, once they realised they had seen several of the matches before, they decided to turn it off and wandered over to Kaida's. Jane, a tall, slender red head, was bustling around the kitchen, and she was quick to grab her daughter and Nila and smother them both in slobbery kisses. Nila flinched and Kaida pulled away in disgust.

"Mum!" she protested, wiping her cheek.

"I missed you," Jane said, cheeks rosy and her eyes gleaming almost feverishly.

"So..." Kaida said, as she and Nila inched away. "What've you been doing?"

"I have brownies," she chimed.

Kaida and Nila exchanged an alarmed look.

"They're nice and soft and chocolaty!"

"Um, sounds good," Kaida said tentatively. "I'm a bit full though. Nila and I ate loads for dinner." A cough. "Um, did you make them?"

"No. Just bought them."

"Oh, OK," Kaida said, perking up. "I suppose I do have a bit of room them."

"Me too," Nila agreed.

A bit of room turned into five brownies a piece. They were very good. It was necessary to check before eating anything Jane offered because, in the twelve years Kaida had lived with Jane, it was a miracle she hadn't died from food poisoning. Fortunately Jane was normally too busy to cook, and bought unhealthy – yet edible – ready meals, or Kaida went and ate at Nila's. When Jane tried to bake, in particular, the results were always atrocious.

"So glad she bought these," Kaida muttered.

Nila nodded. She then shivered at a particularly bad memory of Jane's bread. It had tasted like rotten feet...

Jane walked back into the room, a bright smile on her face, and a Vulpix following her. When Vulpix saw Kaida, she ran up to her and nuzzled her hand. Kaida patted her head and fed it part of a brownie. This had to be the reason she loved fire Pokémon so much. They were so cute and fiery...

"I can't wait until you get your first Pokémon!" Jane squealed, clapping her hands together at the sight of her daughter and her Vulpix. "I could teach it some moves..."

Jane had once been an extraordinary trainer. She had bested gym leader after gym leader and had toured many places from the neighbouring region of Kanto to places much further away like Sinnoh and Hoenn. She had even been to the Orange and Sevii Islands. Then, one day, she had decided it was time to settle down. She rejected many offers to become part of gyms or, allegedly, part of one of the elite teams of one of the regions – she wouldn't say who – and instead had married Kaida's father, who was a minor researcher at Professor Elm's lab, and had had Kaida.

Now she worked, quite profitably, as a trainer and move tutor for other people's Pokémon. People would pay her a reasonable sum to teach their Pokémon moves they could not naturally acquire. She could even help them with battling techniques, stamina, power, and almost anything imaginable.

Unfortunately she was one of those people who thought Pokémon were a great deal cuter than her newborn baby. Kaida had thus been brought up in the household of a Pokémon maniac.

"Anyway," Jane said, snapping out of her daydream about her daughter's first Pokémon. "I was thinking of baking some cake."

Kaida and Nila blanched.

"Well, we need to go to bed soon," Kaida said quickly, despite the fact it was still early.

"Well you could have some for breakfast," Jane suggested. Her eyes lit up. "A treat."

"My teeth might drop out," Nila said. She paused and injected fake shyness into her voice. "But maybe you could wrap some up and pack it in our bags so we can have it for lunch when we set off tomorrow?"

"Sure!" Jane said, beaming. "OK, off to bed with you." Nila and Kaida raised their eyebrows as it was only eight o'clock. "You need to be up early tomorrow to get your Pokémon!"

They decided not to argue, and Kaida asked Nila if she'd double check that Kaida had packed everything. They walked up the stairs and checked that Jane was out of earshot.

"So, those cakes," Kaida muttered.

"Yeah, as soon as we're out of eyesight we'll chuck them," Nila murmured.

Kaida grimaced. "And mercy and pity on whatever fool of a Pokémon might stumble across them and try to eat them."

They reached the top of the landing.

"Pokémon Rumble?" Kaida asked, gesturing towards her room.

Nila sighed. "If we must."

Kaida's room was far more Pokémon obsessed than Nila's. The floor was dark red, the walls a slightly lighter shade, and all the furniture was red and black to match. The colour of walls was only known from Kaida and Nila's memories, since every inch was covered in posters and drawings of Pokémon, the vast majority of them the fire type. Next to Kaida's bed – which was currently covered with Growlithe sheets – was a large mound of soft toys. There were many Cyndaquil, a few of its evolve forms, then odds and ends with three Ponyta, two Growlithe, a few Charmander, one large Charizard, a mini Lugia, and a Moltres. These were just a few of the selection on top: there were many more buried underneath. If Nila ever wanted to threaten Kaida – or rile her – she only had to threaten to burn her plushie pile. It was an effective, yet risky, move.

Kaida settled down on her soft rug – in the shape of a flame – and patted the floor. Nila made a show of reluctance as she sat on the floor next to her friend while Kaida reached to switch the television and game platform on. She inserted Pokémon Rumble and handed Nila one of the controllers.

"Here ya go," she said cheerfully. At Nila's unimpressed look, she added, "I don't know why you bother to pretend to hate it. We both know that you stole it from me!"

Nila had claimed the game was rubbish reflection on Pokémon and all you did was bash 'A' and 'B' about to randomly attack. However, Nila also had an obsessive personality, so when she had failed to complete the game, she had sneaked into Kaida's room, stolen it, and sat up for a whole night trying to finish the game. It was a long game. Nila's parents had discovered her still playing the next morning – after she hadn't come down for breakfast – and had taken her TV and game platform away. The game had been returned to Kaida – who hadn't even noticed it was gone – by a sheepish Nila, who had been forced to apologise to not only Kaida but her whole family. Jane had just patted Nila on the head and given her a stale cookie, which Nila had eaten reluctantly and resentfully in front of her glaring parents. Kaida had laughed. A lot.

"I can't help it," Nila said. Her eye twitched, as it did from both irritation and obsessive thoughts. "It's stupidly addicting." She hastened to add, "Rubbish, too, but... endless." Her eyes narrowed at the last word.

"I can't help that it has so many ranks," Kaida said. She gave a small whoop as the game finally loaded. "Come on, let's go to the Fiery Furnace. They have some really powerful Magmortar and Rapidash that you can get on the Master Level."

Nila made a grumpy noise, but she selected her Pokémon anyway.

"You're just sour this is Sinnoh addition and it doesn't have Umbreon in it," Kaida accused.

Nila shrugged. She was using a Skuntank instead. She hadn't acquired a good Weavile yet, which she was also irritable about. "I'll Poison Gas you," she warned.

"You can't hurt me! I'm on your team!" Kaida said, outraged and also a little confused, since their attacks – unrealistically as Nila had pointed out before – did not work on each other.

Nila shook her head. "I know. It just has that puff of purple that means you won't be able to see what you're doing."

Kaida elbowed her.

After the Fiery Furnace level – which included a lot of Nila snarking at Kaida's so-called tactics – they switched to Pokémon Rumble Hoenn, which included their favourite scene of what was supposed to be a Regice.

"Come on, smack it!" Kaida yelped.

Nila was too busy trying to lure it away from Kaida. "Switch Pokémon, idiot! You're going to die. Do you want us to lose a life? You have no concept of planning at all."

"It's almost dead. I'll be fine!" Kaida declared. A second later, her Pokémon was knocked out. "Oops."

Nila gave Kaida a dirty look. "Now we only have one life left. Get back into the fight quickly... look, pick that... I'm going to die here if you don't hurry up. No, stop hitting him, use the Poison Gas. Do you have any concept of tactics at all?"

"Um, no?" Kaida said. "You just need to keep hitting it."

Nila glared. "How did you get this far?"

"Skill!"

Nila gave a derisive snort at that.

Despite the squabbling, which was a norm for them when they played video games, Kaida and Nila managed to bring down Regice, which then cried out its own name in a squeaky, mechanical tone. It flopped to the floor, fainting. Sadly, they hadn't managed to capture it. However, both girls laughing – as they always were after listening to that particular voiceover – so they didn't care.

"It sounds like a robot on helium!" Kaida giggled.

Nila nodded. "It's ridiculous."

"We have to find a Regice one day to see if it's true!" Kaida punched the air. "It's gonna be great. I don't care if it's legendary class and hardly anyone has seen it..." A second later, she said, "Of course, I need to see Lugia first..."

She looked up at her giant Lugia poster. Lugia was underwater, which made it a stark contrast to the fiery backgrounds in pretty much every other poster in her room. She couldn't help but love Lugia though. She'd seen drawings of the elusive Pokémon and had fallen in love. It looked so amazing. Ho-oh might be Johto's legendary fire alternative, but it kind of looked like a brightly coloured chicken. She wasn't a fan, even if the supposed attack of Sacred Fire would be amazing to see. No, apart from that, she would take a sighting of Lugia in a heartbeat.

"All right, I guess I better go then," Nila said, getting up and brushing hairs from the rug from her legs.

She and Kaida walked into the hall and Kaida saw Nila was looking around a little nervously, glancing up and down the corridor.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow," Kaida said.

She knew exactly why Nila was eager to escape. Unfortunately, it was not her lucky day.

"Who's there?" a voice demanded.

"Um, me?" Kaida said.

"Who is me?" the voice snapped.

"Kaida," Kaida said. "And Nila is here too."

Nila glared and mouthed, "Traitor!"

"And it was you who was causing the uproar?"

They were often very loud playing video games. Another oops.

"Yes, grandma. Sorry, grandma."

"Come in here! Both of you!"

Reluctantly Kaida and Nila walked up to the ajar door and pushed it open. They ended a room to see an old woman rocking gently on a rocking chair in the middle of the room. She had a walking stick propped up beside her and was knitting what appeared to be an extremely lumpy pink scarf. Oh, hell, Kaida thought, hoping desperately it wasn't for her. It probably was. Life hated her.

"Come closer you two," Margaret commanded. "I'm a poor old woman and my legs aren't what they used to be."

Neither Nila nor Kaida had the guts to call Margaret out on her boldfaced lie. Margaret might occasionally wheel herself about on a wheelchair, or lean on her stick, but she could walk perfectly well if she had to. She liked people to underestimate her and cater for her every need. She also liked others to fear her. This was why she particularly enjoyed the wheelchair and her walking stick because she could run people over and hit them.

"Closer!" Margaret ordered.

Nila and Kaida shuffled forwards a few paces.

"Get in front of me right this instant!" Margaret half-screamed.

They were there in an instant and Margaret grabbed her stick from beside her and dealt them two sharp blows each.

"Don't think I don't know what you two are doing! My own granddaughters!"

Yes, Margaret was fine in body, but apparently not in mind. Everyone had to resign themselves to the fact that, no matter what they said, Margaret was completely stubborn and would never concede to them. Therefore there was no point in attempting to explain that Nila was not Margaret's granddaughter. Still, Kaida thought, it was better than when she mixed the pair of them up. It was a little confusing because they looked nothing alike.

"I want some tea!" Margaret demanded.

She was perfectly able to get it herself, Kaida thought, irritated, but she just liked to order people around. She stopped herself from sighing – that would earn her another vicious whack from the stick – and walked back downstairs.

"Now, Kaida," Margaret said to Nila. "I'm glad you've finally grown. I thought you were going to be a midget forever! I asked myself why you couldn't inherit the genes from me and your mother."

As much as Nila feared Margaret – and for good reason – she did always marvel at the extent of Margaret's delusions compared with her ability to function reasonably normally. In this case, not only was she mixing Nila up with her real granddaughter, but she seemed to be under misconception that she herself was tall. Jane, Kaida's mother, was around six foot, but Margaret was only a little taller than Kaida. Kaida had evidently inherited her tiny build from her.

"Now go get me some tea," Margaret said.

"You just sent–OW!"

Nila dodged the second blow.

"Don't speak back to your elders and betters!" Margaret screeched. "And don't run away from me!"

"You wanted tea," Nila said, dashing from the room.

"Don't talk back to me!" Margaret howled after her.

But that was it, Nila was out of there. She had collected enough bruises for one day.

"See you tomorrow!" Nila called to Kaida.

She didn't wait for a response. Kaida might have tried to persuade her to stay by bribing her with more lovely store-bought brownies.

Kaida heard someone coming down the stairs and glanced out of the kitchen just in time to see Nila dart out the door and slam it behind her. She scowled. Coward. Then again, it was better to be a coward as far as Margaret was concerned. She did not accept insubordination. Margaret would possibly be the scariest military commander ever. There would be no disobedience or mutiny under her watch.

Kaida finished the tea and brought it upstairs to Margaret. She handed it over and Margaret took a sip before spitting it out.

"Bleurgh!" Margaret scowled. "Are you trying to poison me?"

"Sorry," Kaida apologised. "I can go make more…?"

"No, don't bother. It will be just as rubbish. Help me into bed and that clean that up!"

Kaida helped support her grandmother over to the bed, which was a considerable feat since Margaret was a lot heavier than her small frame suggested. Kaida then turned to leave when she felt the polished stick land on her shoulder. She gulped and turned around.

"Why have you shrunk?" Margaret asked suspiciously.

"I haven't shrunk."

"Yes, you have," Margaret said angrily. "Don't contradict me."

That was Nila, you fool, Kaida thought. She didn't dare voice these thoughts.

"And your hair! It was dark brown and now it is that horrible shade of red!"

"Thanks!" Kaida spluttered.

"You know how I feel about hair dye!" Margaret said, whacking her stick onto Kaida's arm.

"Yeah," Kaida said, now sufficiently annoyed to get some guts and argue back. "You liked it until you got so many greys it couldn't cover it. Then you got sour and now no one else can use it!"

"How dare you!"

Kaida jumped backwards before she could land another hit. She ran towards the door. She was about to leave the room when she poked her head back around and yelled, "It wasn't dyed anyway!"

She dodged, swiftly, as Margaret threw her stick at her. It clattered off the wall with a long bang. That was going to leave a dent. Hopefully her grandmother would have forgotten about this in the morning. Otherwise Kaida was dead.

Kaida padded back downstairs, entered the kitchen, and was immediately grabbed by her mother who was covered in cake mix. Kaida's face came dangerously close to a spatula covered

"Kaida sweetie can you go feed the guests please. I'm a little..." She looked down at herself. "Well you know, be a dear, the bowls are on the table outside." She smiled and returned to her baking, or mess making. The latter was a more apt description.

"Fine," Kaida said, deciding not to bring up that her mother had just told her to go to bed.

Kaida pushed open the back door of the kitchen and walked out into the madhouse. A large garden stretched before her, with a decent sized pond for any water Pokémon, and some patches of rocks, shrubs, and trees for the land Pokémon.

"OK, losers. Dinnertime," Kaida yelled, picking up two dishes and banging them together.

Heads turned from every corner of the garden as Kaida poured the home made food into many little bowls before carrying them to various areas of the garden. She fed some wriggling Wurmple and Caterpie, who slid down from the trees; next were a Geodude and a Nosepass situated in the rockery; and after came a Teddiursa and a Gliscor, who were huddled in a makeshift cave. She spotted a Magikarp floating around the pond, when she went to the pool to feed the two Goldeen, and wondered what on earth could be taught to a Magikarp to make it less of a joke. Perhaps a slap attack, as nobody would want to be slapped in the face with a wet fish... She was pulled out of her daydream when she was tackled in the back of the legs by a Poochyena.

"Ooof!"

Kaida landed face down in the grass. She turned her head to glare at the Pokémon, who was now being advanced on by an angry Geodude, whose dinner had been scattered over the lawn.

"Damn dark Pokémon," Kaida said angrily.

"You can't damn dark Pokémon," Nila said.

Kaida turned her body and sat up to see her friend leaning over the fence.

"Spectacular fall by the way. Beautiful landing. Ten out of ten." Nila smirked

"Go play with a Metagross," Kaida said, glaring.

She walked the width of the garden and hopped up onto a bench to reach eye level with Nila.

"Well, aren't you pleasant this evening," Nila said genially.

"And you are very chicken-ish this evening," Kaida muttered.

"Oh come on," Nila said. She then actually pouted. It was creepy. "Wild Gengar would run from your grandmother. She is a psycho."

"Nila!" a voice called.

"Yes, Mother," Nila yelled back.

She gave Kaida a desperate look that begged Kaida to save her.

"Have you packed for tomorrow?" Nila's mother demanded.

"Yes, mother," Nila repeated wearily.

"Have you packed enough clean underwear?"

"Yes, I have!" Nila screamed back. She scowled. "I'm a big girl now, Mother."

"Well, I found your black, lacy pair! Do you want me to pack them?"

"What?" Nila yelped. She leapt back from the fence in shock. "I don't own any!"

"Hmm," Nila's mother mused. "Maybe they are your brother's then."

"What?" Nila cried, mortified.

At this statement Jane's head popped out of the kitchen window.

"What are you shouting about?" Jane asked. She spotted Nila's mother and smiled. "Hello, Kate."

"Oh, we are just discussing the whereabouts of Nila's underwear," Kaida answered simply.

Jane nodded as if this was a perfectly normal occurrence. "I was just thinking, Kaida," she thought. "Will there be anyone else travelling with you? Will they want cake? Any boys? I know how much growing boys eat..." She ducked back into the kitchen without waiting for an answer.

"Boys?" Kate queried.

"Yes, Mother." Nila gnashed her teeth, wondering what her mother wanted now.

"Shall I pack some condoms?"

"WHAT?" Nila screamed.

Kaida burst into fits of laughter.

Nila wasn't finished. Outraged, she shouted, "I'm twelve, mother."

Nila's mother tutted. "It's better to be safe than sorry."

"Excuse me while I kill my mother," Nila muttered to a hysterical Kaida before storming back into her house, slamming the door with as much force as she could muster.

Kaida didn't stop laughing for a long time.