Lost Again, a Jonas story

by phoebenpiper

"What time is it right now in L.A.?"

Joe glanced at his watch and shrugged. "I don't know - my watch is still set on Sydney time."

"Mine, too," Kevin said sadly.

"But hey, maybe we can do that math thing Nick taught us."

"What math thing?"

"You know - Nick told us Sydney's 17 hours ahead of L.A., so we just need to add - wait, maybe we need to subtract - 17 hours from Sydney."

"I think we subtract, 'cuz I remember Nick added when we came over." Kevin glanced at his watch again. "But that can't be right, because it's only 10am, so if we subtract we'd get…um…," Kevin struggled to calculate the complicated computation in his head, "negative seven? And how can the time be negative?"

"Maybe the negative means it's yesterday," Joe suggested.

"You mean it's yesterday right now?"

"How cool is that?" Joe was thrilled. "It's like a real-life time machine!"

"Amazing! Whoever thought a time machine would look like a simple airplane?"

"It IS a simple airplane," Nick spoke up from his middle seat, although he kept his eyes closed. "And there's no such thing as a time machine."

"But we just traveled back in time," Joe said.

"Didn't we?" Kevin asked.

Nick sighed. "I already explained all this on the flight over. Yes, it is 'yesterday' in L.A. compared to Sydney. No, this isn't a time machine. Now, if you don't mind, I'm TRYING to sleep."

Kevin sat back in his seat but soon got bored. Someone has already done the crossword puzzle in the in-flight magazine, and he had never learned how to do sudoku. Finally, he leaned over, straining to see out the window. "What can you see, Joe?" he asked.

"Don't LEAN on me," Nick grumbled.

The eldest Jonas sat back, pouting, as Joe answered, "Don't worry, bro - there's nothing to see. All that's out there is ocean…and maybe a little island down there somewhere."

Kevin gasped excitedly. "Just like on Lost! Do you think our plane is off-course, too?" His enthusiasm turned to fear as he wondered, "What if we crashed right now? No one would be able to find us! And how would we survive?"

"I TOLD you to listen to the safety demonstration," Nick commented drily, absently shifting his neck pillow.

"You're right. YOU'RE RIGHT!" Kevin was growing hysterical. "I'm gonna drown, and it's all my own fault!"

His eyes still closed, Nick calmly reached into the seat back in front of him and handed the safety card to his eldest brother.

Joe, however, was still excited about the prospect. "That'd be awesome if we crashed! And I'd totally get to be Charlie!"

"Why do YOU get to be Charlie?" Kevin asked. "I'M the one who plays guitar."

"Yeah, but I'M adorable," Joe countered.

"Technically *I* should be Charlie," Nick said, his eyes still closed. "Charlie was the YOUNGER brother in Drive Shaft and the one who wrote all the songs and played all the instruments."

"That's true," Kevin agreed, "you DO have all the talent."

"However," Nick continued drily, "since I DON'T have a heroin addiction, I think I'll pass on being Charlie …when we crash…and suddenly turn into fictional TV characters."

"Charlie? Charlie who?" Stella asked, peaking her head over the back of her seat.

"We're discussing which Lost characters we'd be if our plane crashed," Joe explained.

"Nick would TOTALLY be Charlie," Macy said, popping up next to Stella. "Charlie's dreamy."

"He's also a heroin addict," Nick grumbled.

Kevin nodded, whispering, "Nick seems a bit sensitive on that subject."

"And you're supposed to keep your seatbelts fastened when you're in your seats," Nick pointed out to the girls, clearly not pleased that they had joined in on this ridiculous conversation.

"So who would *I* be?" Stella asked, ignoring Nick's safety comment.

Joe smiled. "Definitely Shannon - she was hot…I mean BLONDE! Shannon was BLONDE!" Joe quickly corrected, although his face remained red.

Macy tilted her head in thought. "So if Stella is Shannon, I guess that makes Joe Boone."

"Ian Sommerhalder's so dreamy," Stella sighed. "And he's welcome to bite my neck anytime!"

This remark was lost on Kevin. "Boone didn't bite anyone."

"Vampire Diaries, dummy," Macy teased.

"Yeah, dummy," Nick replied drily, eliciting an elbow in his side from his brother.

Meanwhile, on his other side, Joe was not accepting this latest bit of casting. "I don't WANT to be Boone - he didn't even last through the first season!"

"That's true," Stella said deflatedly. "And Shannon only lasted a few episodes into 2nd season."

"Also, Shannon and Boone are step-siblings with a strange incestuous relationship," Nick pointed out.

"Ew!" "No!" "Gross!"

"Hey, *I* know," Macy said excitedly, "Joe could totally be Sawyer - they both do that same super cool hair flip."

As if to demonstrate, Joe unconsciously flipped his hair out of his eyes. "Sawyer would be great - he even made it off the island at the end."

"He's also a con man and a cold-blooded killer."

"Nick has a point," Kevin said. "Joe's too difficult to cast. Let's start with me - who would *I* be?"

"Hurley." "Hurley." "Hurley."

All eyes turned to Nick's closed ones, waiting to see if he had an objection to this character assignment, but he merely yawned and readjusted his neck pillow.

"Cool!" Kevin said.

"And I think Nick should be Jack," Stella said. "Jack's the leader."

"And very logical," Joe pointed out.

"And a total Fox," Macy added dreamily.

Once again, all eyes turned to Nick, but his breathing had grown slow and steady.

"I think he's asleep," Kevin whispered loudly.

"Do me next!" Macy eagerly requested.

"You'd make a good Kate," Joe said.

"Yeah, I can totally see that," Stella agreed. "She's super cute."

"And she's totally athletic, with all her tree-climbing and stuff," Macy agreed.

"And she's totally a fugitive, with all her law-breaking and stuff."

"I guess he's NOT asleep," Kevin loudly whispered.

"Let's try me again," Stella suggested.

"Claire?"

"Pregnant, then crazy…and a killer."

"Sun?"

"An adulterer…and a killer…and dead."

"Ana Lucia?"

"A crooked cop…and a killer…and dead."

"Libby?"

"Also dead…or just plain crazy."

"Juliet?"

"Not on the plane."

Kevin sighed frustrated. "This is impossible!"

"Let's try Joe again," Stella suggested.

"How about Sayid?" Joe offered. "He's super cool."

"He's a torturer…and a killer…and dead."

"Michael?"

"Obsessed with his kid…and a killer…and dead."

"Mr. Eko?"

"A Nigerian drug smuggler…and a killer…and dead."

"Jin?"

"A Korean mobster…and dead."

"Locke?"

"Too old!" Joe himself protested before Nick could respond.

Stella sighed. "Everyone on this stupid show is flawed," she complained.

"That's kinda the point," Nick explained.

"Lost is too hard, so let's choose a different show," Joe suggested.

"Another show of characters to turn into when we crash?" Nick asked drily.

"Hey, I know," Kevin cried out. "Gilligan's Island!"

"Perfect," Macy said, clapping her hands together.

"Yes, 'perfect'," Nick grumbled sarcastically, his eyes rolling under his closed lids.

"So who are WE?" Stella pointedly asked Joe, gesturing to herself and Macy.

"That's easy," Joe said. "You're Ginger, and Macy's Mary Ann, of course!"

Stella and Macy shared happy smiles and a high five. "Awesome!" "Perfect!"

"And Nick HAS to be the professor," Kevin said.

"Of course," Stella agreed.

"Yeah," Joe chimed in, "but who does that make US, Kev?"

"You're KIDDING, right?"

For the first time since the flight took off from Australia, Nick opened his eyes and looked meaningfully back and forth between his brothers, who returned his looks with blank stares. He then shook his head, reclined his seat back, and closed his eyes once again. "And I'm serious - if I have a nightmare about being stuck on a deserted island with TWO Gilligans, heads are gonna roll."

THE END