Hell No, He's Not
by Soulmate of Silence
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
x.x.x.x.x
Shrieks filled the air as the coolest, hottest, richest boys in the school strolled down the hallway of Konoha High, one of the most prestigious schools in the world. Only 2% of the most elite teens made it in. The school fee was enough to feed 5 families in Africa for 5 years.
"Hi, Sasuke-kun!"
"Neji-kun, you look fresh today!"
"Hey, Kiba-kun! How are you?"
"Shika-kun, are you sure you don't want to sleep at my house?"
"Here's some ramen, Naruto-kun!"
Unfortunately for almost all the fangirls, four of the five men were taken. All except… Sasuke Uchiha, the leader of the group. His family owned a law firm and his father could buy practically all of the land in the world. They were the ultimate billionaires. Itachi Uchiha was a powerful heir and former graduate of Konoha High. He'd graduated to become a lawyer, like his father.
Sasuke Uchiha was rich, hot, and laid-back. All girls wanted him, many guys wanted to be him.
Prom was coming up soon. And Sasuke Uchiha was going to be bombarded with begs from fangirls. He just knew it.
x.x.x.x.x
"Sasuke-kun!" A certain redhead tried to strut flirtatiously up to the said guy.
"…What do you want, Karin?"
A smirk appeared on her face and she whispered in his ear, "Come with me to prom."
A horrified look painted itself onto Sasuke's features and he swiftly walked away, shuddering, from the psycho slut.
"Sasuke-kun, you know you'll like it!" she called after him. But he was long gone, a cluster of fangirls swarming around him.
Damn, Sasuke. Fuck my life. That whore already? Do I need to broadcast that I, Sasuke Uchiha, already have a date to the winter prom?
x.x.x.x.x
"Oi, teme! So the slut has asked you yet again this year out to prom? What'd you do this time?" A loud-mouthed blonde was trying to talk to Sasuke while eating ramen. The instant noodles spilled out of his mouth and back into the bowl. His girlfriend, Hinata, hurried to clean Naruto up and tried to dab at his face with a napkin.
"Naruto-kun, p-please stop moving, it's hard to clean you and your ramen up," she pleaded, a blush spreading on her cheeks.
"Oi, sorry, Hina-chan." He smiled cheekily and hugged the timid girl. "You're the best, Hina-chan!" At hearing this, the said beauty fainted and Naruto looked down in confusion. "Huh? What did I do now?"
Tenten sighed and rolled her eyes. "I'll take her to the nurse." She got up and abandoned her lunch. "Neji, don't eat my sushi." She glared at the Hyuga to drill some seriousness into him.
"Yes, Ten-chan." He smirked and waved a hand, dismissing her to go off with Hinata. Keeping an eye on the cafeteria doors, he inched a hand towards his girlfriend's sushi. Another hand slapped his and he looked up, surprised.
"What the fuck, Hyuga." Kiba glared at him and muttered, "Don't be like Ino."
The said blue-eyed blonde glowered at him and said, "What was that, Kiba?" all while keeping an innocent face.
"N-nothing, baby." He nervously smiled, then took a sudden interest in his nachos, grabbing them and devouring them like he'd been starved for weeks.
"Thought so, baby." She smirked, then resumed picking at her low-fat, zero calorie salad.
"Ino-pig, stop dieting and eat some damn pizza." A commanding voice towered over Ino and her perfect, artificial looking salad. She gulped, not knowing that her best friend was playing a prank on her.
"H-holy crap!" Ino paled (if that was even possible with her light toned skin).
Sakura tried to suppress a giggle, but it came out as a fit of laughter. Shikamaru looked at her, bewildered, then muttered, "Troublesome people." He then promptly fell asleep.
Sasuke shrugged and said, "So, Sa-Ku-Ra, are we still on for prom?"
Sakura immediately stopped laughing and replied calmly, "Hell yes."
Finally, Saku. You can PWN that redhead bitch and be with Sasuke-kun at prom! Score! CHA!
x.x.x.x.x
"Forehead!"
A voice pierced through the relaxing silence in Sakura's bedroom. When she heard the voice, she got up and marched, pissed, over to her bedroom window. She yanked the curtain away from the glass and slid open the window.
"WHAT THE FU-" She paused abruptly when she saw that the person yelling was her best friend, the Pig.
"Kami, Forehead, don't get your panties into a bunch." Ino was sitting in her car, leaning out the window. "So, you coming with us to look for a prom dress or not?"
"When was this decided?" she asked, clearly confused.
"Uh, Forehead, don't you ever check your cell?" Ino said, flipping her hair. "Get with the 21st century, thank you very much." She rolled her eyes then stared at Sakura in disbelief.
"…" The pinkette stared at the blonde.
"So, you coming or not?" Ino pressed. She gave Sakura the ultimate puppy eyes.
"…Fine." Sakura succumbed to Ino's pleading eyes and got in the car, much to Ino's whoops of pleasure. She turned around in the soft leather seat to be greeted by three other faces: Tenten, Hinata, and Temari.
"Hi, Saki!" Temari said happily.
"OH MY KAMI, IT'S BEEN FOREVER ?"
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"Omigod, that dress looks H-O-T on you, Tennie!" Temari smiled at Tenten and gave her the thumbs-up. "That pink totally suits your complexion."
"Thanks, Tem. The black looks spicy on you." Tenten smirked as Temari blushed. "Do you think Neji will like this?" She twirled around to show off the coral pink skirt of her dress.
"Duh, Ten." Sakura strutted out of the dressing stall like a model on the runway, pausing every so often and striking a pose. This made the girls laugh. "So, what do you think?" She was wearing an emerald green dress that matched her eyes. Her long hair was let down, so it hung down her back in waves.
"Y-you look nice, Sakura-chan," a timid voice said from behind her. Sakura spun around and came face-to-face with Hinata, who was fitted into a purple dress that was tight at the waist and showed off her curves.
"Wow, Hina-chan. You look super hot. Naruto's going to be drooling…" Ino trailed off, making the Hyuga girl blush.
"Well," Temari commented, "Your eyes set off the silver, and the spotlight's gonna be on you, sister."
Ino smiled and said, "I hope Kiba likes it."
"Why wouldn't he? Dog-boy has class and taste…"
x.x.x.x.x
Karin paced furiously around the room. "Ami! Get me my frappe! NOW!" she barked at Ami, her second-in-command.
"Yes, miss!" Ami scurried off to Starbucks only to promptly return a minute later, drink in hand. "Here, Karin." She handed the drink over.
Karin took a long sip of the frappe. "Ami, we're going prom dress shopping."
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"Well, well. If it isn't the Billboard Brow." A sneer filled the air and ruined the happy mood in Takashima's, Tokyo's ultimate dress shoppe.
Ino spun around and glared at Karin. "Oh, look, girls. It's the whore. Have you come here to bang the clerk? His name is Takahashi. Oh wait, you already did!" Ino let out a fake gasp, then smirked.
"Whatever, bitch." Karin jutted out her hip, then placed her hand on it.
Sakura did the once-over. "Ugh, mini-skirt, mini-shirt, mini-brain, mini-chest, what's next?" she muttered in disgust.
Temari 'pfft'ed and scoffed, "Big ass, huge hips… What a tramp. Probably already banged half of Tokyo."
"Well, Temari, I fucked Momoro, and it was lovely." Karin smiled sickeningly at Temari.
Temari stiffened and snapped, "We broke up nine months ago. He's free to fuck any whore he likes now."
"Bitch, did you know that Sakura's going to prom with Sasuke?" Tenten threw in, glaring at the slut and her slut-in-training.
Karin gaped and yelled, "YOU? Pancake chest? Yeah, right. He's so going to go out with me."
"Wait and see, girl, wait and see," Ino retorted, pissed.
Sakura pulled Ino out the door of the shop, the other girls following suit. Hinata stayed behind to pay for the outfits (which the girls had walked out of the store in) and thanked the clerk.
x.x.x.x.x
Okay, this is going to be a two-shot. It's official.
Critique welcomed! Reviewers get… hugs! Virtual hugs! :D
Yours, Soul-chan.
