I own no characters in this story they are JK Rowling's, apart from Dilly the house elf and Aliquo the owl.
Summary– Set after OotF and before HBP. Draco is on summer holidays, his father is in Azkaban and all seems to be going right for Draco until Voldemort and the Death Eaters move in. HBP from Draco's perspective. I have re-started this story as the other one wasn't going how I planned it, it also sounded shitty :P
Authors Notes– Reference and scenes of abuse and depression
The Other Boy
Chapter 1
Desperation is an interesting place to be. For me, I spend my time regularly in this place. It hits me in the chest like a cruciartus curse, powerful and feels as though it lasts forever. I feel as if everything I am trying to escape from comes back in one deadly blow. I can't breathe. I can't flee. I can't even call out for help. My thoughts spiral around me violently like a rope tying me up in more ways than one. Like a piece of meat. Life ceases to be something for living, but something that is trapping me. I eventually snap out of this place because psychological I cannot sustain it. Then I go back to shifting stages of denial, distractions, numbness, complacency, but I know it is only a matter of time until I am there again, and with each visit it becomes hard to shake the linger feelings of utter hopeless. It gets harder to sleep at night. I lose faith in everything around me, and I lose faith in myself. I lose faith in the idea of ever transcending this period of my life, I lose faith that there is even a place to transcendent to. I lose hope in the idea of ever changing. I just lose fucking hope.
It was 4pm on a hot summer's day as Draco lay on his four poster queen sized bed in his family's manor. He was just over a month into his holidays and he was already looking forward to going back to Hogwarts. Since his father had become imprisoned in Azkaban, the manor had become the headquarters for the Dark Lord and his followers. On one hand, Draco was relieved that his father was in Azkaban as he could spend his summer fear free of punishment for his bad grades (even though he was coming second, behind Granger for all his classes) and the lessons that his father so regularly gave him, but he hated the fact that the Death Eaters and Lord Voldemort were in his house as if it were their own. Draco had confined himself to the far west wing of the manor as it was the furthest away from everybody and had everything he needed. He spent most of his days in his room and reading in the west wing library or going to Diagon Alley to meet up with friends. He was actually quite content staying by himself. He hardly saw anyone, apart from his house elf Dilly who would come and check up on him and his owl Aliquo, he hadn't even seen his mother since she picked him up from the train station. But that wasn't surprising to Draco as she never really cared for him and she never tried to stop the lessons and punishments when they happened.
As Draco lay on his bed, he felt something inside him that he hadn't felt in years, it was actual happiness. He was sick of feeling lonely and he was sick of the pain he felt throughout his body every day. He did not want to fall back into the grasp of emptiness and to pretend that everything was fine. He wanted this feeling to last forever. However, just like everything else in his life, his happiness was sure to crumble and he would plummet into darkness with no escape. Draco was staring out of his bedroom window that over looked one of the elaborate garden's on the Manor grounds when his house elf Dilly appeared in his room
"Mister Malfoy, Sir, Mistress Narcissa requests that you meet her in the foyer in 10 minutes". Dilly was very shy, whenever he was around people he would never talk and kept to the background unless called upon, except around Draco. Dilly had been Draco's friend since he was very young and they shared a bond that could be described as brotherly like. Dilly looked after Draco after ever lesson and punishment Lucius inflicted on Draco and vice versa. Lucius thought that house elves where the scum of the world and that Draco was no better. However, with Lucius in Azkaban, the summer for Draco had been a well deserved holiday, even though he was cooped up in the west wing by himself.
His mother hardly ever talked to Draco and when she did it was always to bring him bad news. Draco could feel the darkness creeping back as he started to worry about what his mother wanted from him. He got to his feet and thanked Dilly. He could hear his father's voice in the back of his head telling him that 'a Malfoy always looks their best no matter what' as he got dressed and combed his hair to look presentable for his mother.
He walked down the stairs into the foyer and greeted his mother. His mother directed him to walk down the hall to the east wing of the manor
"How have you been?" Narcissa asked as they were walking past the ball room.
"I'm fine thanks, and you?" Draco hated the rehearsed conversations that he had to have with his mother. It was always the same questions and the same answers and Narcissa only had these conversations with Draco only to seem interested in his life even if she didn't listen to a word Draco said.
"Not too bad, there is a new dress robe at Madam Malkin's that I think you should buy"
"Oh ok, thanks, I'll go check it out" Draco had no intention of buying a new dress robe as he would rather spend his money on things he really needed. They both walked in silence until they came to Lucius's study. Narcissa turned to Draco and put her hands on his shoulders, the first time in a long time that she actually touched him, and she started to whisper
"Now Draco, listen to me very carefully, the Dark Lord wants to speak with you, make sure you listen to whatever he says and do whatever he asks, do not speak unless asked a question and do not embarrass this family anymore than what your inept father has done. Do you understand me?"
"Yes mother" Draco had never meet the Dark Lord in person before and he really did not want to either. He was becoming nervous and sweat was forming on his brow. Narcissa knocked on the door which made Draco jump a bit
"Come in please" was heard from the other side of the door and Narcissa opened the door
"Good evening my Dark Lord, I have Draco as you asked".
"Ahh Draco, just the person I was after, would you kindly take a seat please" Draco entered the room and sat down on the chair Lord Voldemort pointed to. Draco tried to calm his heavy breathing. His brain was in overdrive thinking up all different scenarios as to why Lord Voldemort wanted to see him. His father had failed the dark lord and now he was going to have to pay for his father's failures.
Narcissa took a seat at the back of the room while Lord Voldemort was pacing the room.
"Draco, as you are well aware, your father has failed in his mission I set him to complete before these holidays and has been foolish enough to get caught and thrown into Azkaban. I now have to break Lucius out which will be using my precious time and resources". Draco was shocked, his father was going to be broken out of Azkaban, he was going to return when Draco thought he had escaped his father. He looked at Lord Voldemort who was still pacing the room trying to plead with his eyes to let Lucius rot in Azkaban, however Lord Voldemort continued his speech.
"This means I will need one more person to help with my plans on killing Dumbledore and getting the death eaters into Hogwarts. As you are a student at Hogwarts I am giving you the task of getting death eaters into Hogwarts and killing Dumbledore yourself." Draco's mind was racing, surely Lord Voldemort was joking, Draco had only just turned 16, he wasn't even of age yet and he was expected to kill Dumbledore, no way could he do that, he couldn't even kill a hinky-punk. He didn't want to be a death eater or be a follower of Lord Voldemort, he would rather be a part of the Order then be with this sadistic bastard and kill innocent people, anyone for that matter. Draco looked to his mother for help however she was sitting very still looking at a spot just behind Lord Voldemort with a blank look on her face. Draco couldn't feel anything but dread in the bottom of his stomach and it was making him feel nauseas.
"Now, if you don't mind Draco and Narcissa, I have some business to attend to" Voldemort pointed to the door, Draco stood up slowly as he was feeling light headed and walked to the door. As he got out side he leaned against the wall and was starting to hyperventilate.
"This is a great honour Draco, you have the chance to kill Dumbledore, there are many of us who would kill to be given this task. And your father will be returning to us, this is a great day" and with that Narcissa turned on her heel and walked swiftly down the hall and out of sight. As soon as Narcissa was out of view Draco run back to his room. As he reached the kitchen of the west wing he collapsed on the floor with a big shatter. He couldn't believe what just happened, he stayed kneeling on the floor replaying the previous event over and over in his head until Dilly popped into the room
"Mister Draco, Sir, I have been listening to the guests and I overheard them saying that Master Lucius will be broken out of Azkaban tomorrow night" Dilly placed a re-assuring hand on Draco's back and then apperated away.
Draco couldn't think, his memories of his father started flooding into his mind and Draco started hyperventilating again. No, he can't come back, oh please he can't come back, his going to come back and punish me, he'll punish me for not getting the top marks at school, he'll punish me for not looking perfect all the time, oh please this can't be happening. Draco couldn't breathe and his heart was pounding fast. The earlier burst of happiness was gone and now replaced with terror and hopelessness that he could barely handle. He was so sure that he was free of Lucius and he could not bear the thought of killing another human being. His stomach started to churn violently and he got up and ran, only just making it to the toilet. He started to feel faint and he hit the floor with a thud and passed out.
Authors Notes: Please review my story, I know it's only a short chapter, but I really like feedback :)
