Seriously, don't search "poop-dot-com."
EDIT: Please note that I've changed Hala's last name (to Madani) after learning that it is actually the name of a Muslim community in North India and Pakistan. Since I originally found it on a website of surnames, I was unaware of its origins. Since Hala does not belong to this community, nor has heritage from there, I see it best to change her name to avoid offense or cultural appropriation of the Darzi peoples.
I do not own Marvel.
"Hala 'Hal' Madani," former SHIELD Agent Maria Hill says her name, tossing an open file on the table in front of her. Glancing down at the old-school ink and paper file, Hal sees her mugshots clipped to the front, along with other basic information. She returns her gaze to the older woman, crossing her arms under her chest as Hill continues. "Arrested for one-hundred and twenty-two accounts of identity theft and the illegal electronic transferal of nearly one billion dollars."
"Don't forget the one for assault," Hal pipes up.
Hill's face twists into a wry smile. "Yes, the one charge of physical assault on the agent who tried to arrest you."
"And failed."
"And yet, here you are, in federal prison," Hill states with an edge of steel.
"Yeah," Hal scoffs, rolling her eyes, "only 'cause you sicced your precious, little Avengers on me. I'd be on a beach in Chile right now if Stark hadn't blasted me in the ass with a laser."
The agent sighs deeply and takes a seat across from her. Hala is unperturbed by Hill's obvious irritation; in fact, at this point, she'd say she lives for it. Their monthly check-ups have become something she looks forward to, watching Hill's eyebrows knit together and her lips purse whenever Hal misdirects the conversation, or talks so much that Hill can't get a word in edgewise. It's almost like discovering the internet all over again, but with one less search of "poop-dot-com."
Hal wonders how Hill hasn't yet given up on recruiting her into the Avengers, or SHIELD, or whatever organization she's working for now.
Regardless, this month's visit is extremely entertaining, as recent events already have Hill tremendously stressed. From what she's heard the guards talking about – since your access to technology is restricted to pencil and paper – there's some big baddie named Ultron flying around causing harm. It's old hat considering the fact that the Avengers stopped a race of space worms led by an actual Norse god, which is why Hal supposes Hill's actually present here, instead of aiding the rest with Ultron's takedown. She can imagine that, even without a helicarrier and some baldy with an eyepatch, the so-called world's greatest heroes will have no problem taking this person down.
"Look, I'm going to cut to the chase because the longer I sit here chatting with you, the more people are going to die; the Avengers need your help."
And, of course, she thinks too soon. Hal's eyes are practically bulging out of her sockets at these words. Not "they want," but "they need," as in former SHIELD Agent Maria Hill has to beg for her help. No longer is she merely trying to goad Hala into reforming and using her powers for the greater good. No, they won't succeed without her – at least, not without some astronomical amount of damage. Meaning that there is most definitely something in it for her.
"Oh? And what do I get in return? A pat on the back from good, ol' Captain America? Or a thank you card from Director Fury himself?" Hal clasps her hands and flutters her eyelashes, as if in rapture over the prospect of either reward.
Hill practically has to force the next few sentences out of her mouth. "All charges will be forgiven, your life sentence terminated, and only six months' probation." Hal almost hollers with laughter at such an ironic twist of fate, but Hill throws her hand up to silence her before she can even chuckle. "On the condition that you agree to join the Avengers initiative and abide by their laws."
"Aw, what? That's fuckin' lame!" Hal's hands fall heavily into her lap. "What if I don't agree?"
"Well, then you won't get out of prison and it's highly likely you'll die in a fiery explosion when Ultron destroys the earth." There's a brief moment of silence. "Or whatever he's planning."
That's why they need her. They don't even know what he's on about, so they want Hal to hack his shit and find out. But, damn, she thought she was the one with the upper hand. Now she has the ultimatum of joining the Avengers, or possibly dying in a scratchy orange jumpsuit with an unsatisfying meal of beans and rice in her stomach. Okay, so not much of a choice, but she doesn't want to join the Avengers. She just wants to take care of her parents and move to the most remote location on earth where no one but internet trolls can bother her again.
However, the thought of the parents makes the decision for her.
"I'll agree," Hal all but groans. "But I want my parents to be safe and supported."
"Already done."
Hill immediately stands and motions to the guards. The two uniformed men step forward, one holding her by the shoulders while the other unlocks her wrists from the handcuffs and her feet from the shackles on the chair. Then, surprisingly, they step away from Hal, folding their hands behind their backs. She looks down at her bare wrists, then over at Hill.
"You're serious about this?" Hala asks, still in disbelief.
"Completely." Hill turns, opens the door, and gestures for Hal to go first. "Now, hurry up; we've got a plane to catch."
"What? We're going now? I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to my friends."
"Do you really want to stay her for longer than necessary?"
"Hell, no. Let's get the fuck outta here."
