Note: So I was super sad about this week's episode because I love me some Finchel. So, I decided to write this. Hopefully everything works out in the show, and hopefully you guys like. I'll post the next chapter soon =)
Finn found himself standing at Rachel's door. He shouldn't have come here, he knew that, but she hadn't been at school since the day he broke up with her and he had to know that she was alright. He hated her for what she did, but he cared still even though he shouldn't. He rang the door bell and stood there wondering what he was going to say when she answered the door, no one came though. He looked around in the driveway and neither of her Dads' cars was there.
Maybe nobody's home, he thought. He grabbed the doorknob to see if it was locked but to his surprise the door opened. He looked behind him at the walkway, wondering if he should just turn around and go home. He sighed as he walked through the door.
Just a quick chat, just to see if she is okay, nothing more…nothing more, he told himself over and over. He heard the sound of piano coming from their family room, no doubt Rachel playing. He crossed the foyer and stepped into the room where Rachel's back was turned toward him, she was playing some classical song that had no lyrics, which was surprising to him. It sounded sad, as soon as he really started listening to it his heart sunk a little. He shouldn't have come here, Rachel had done this to herself and maybe she should just be left alone to think about that. He turned around to head back to the door, but his elbow caught on the frame sending a pain through his arm and releasing a loud thud into the room.
"Finn?" Rachel's voice called out to him, instantly forcing him to turn around.
"Um, hey," he responded awkwardly, fidgeting in the doorway. Rachel looked happy for half a second, then her face fell.
"What are you doing here Finn?" she asked. She stared at the ground in front of her, unable to make eye contact with the boy she had hurt so much.
"You haven't been at school. I was just making sure, I mean, I wanted to know if-" he cut himself off not wanting to say anything that would make her think he'd forgiven her.
"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice trying to sound hard and cold.
"I'm fine. My Dad's and I have been in Columbus for the past few days," she replied softly, her voice faltering which made Finn look at her, really look at her for the first time. She looked awful, she was wearing jeans and a tee shirt, no makeup, her usually perfectly straight sleek hair was wavy and tangled and Finn knew that she definitely was not alright.
"Weird time for a family get away, don't you think?" he asked further, knowing on the inside that he probably should have just left after she said she was okay.
"Oh, we weren't on vacation," she began, "We were actually looking at houses that were for sale," she looked up at him, waiting for him to smile and say 'Good Riddance.' Finn's eyes widened as his brains slowly processed what she had just said. He couldn't find the words to say.
"We're probably going to be moving there," Rachel added. Finn wanted to say a lot of things, he wanted to beg her not to go, to tell her that maybe if she'd just give him some time he could forgive her.
"But, Glee…" was all he could come up with. Rachel scoffed and stood up from her piano bench, brushing dust that wasn't there off her pants.
"Honestly Finn, Glee would be a lot better off without me," she said. Finn blinked a few times; did Rachel Berry just say the Glee Club didn't need her? Finn couldn't count the number of times that she had specifically and very vocally proclaimed how crucial she was to the club.
"Everyone hates me Finn," she told him, turning her back to him again because she felt that lump in her throat, the one that seemed to be stuck there for the past week. "Everybody in the club would be a lot happier if I wasn't in it anymore. You and I both know that," she said.
"That's…That's not…true," Finn tried to sound sure of himself, but the truth was that everyone did hate her. He suddenly felt really guilty.
"People have been cruel to me since pre-school," she scoffed a little, "Up until recently, I've always been able to lie to myself, tell myself that everyone is just jealous of me. Now, I just don't have it in me anymore, there is just no denying that I have no real friends. I had you but I went and screwed that up as well, and now all that I have left is just a lot of cruel jokes and everyone telling me I suck all the time," she trailed off, a tear rolling down her cheek.
"But Rachel, you never cared about that before," Finn said, walking towards her then changing his mind and taking a few steps back. Rachel turned to look at him and rolled her eyes.
"I always cared, I just chose not to let it get the best of me because I always knew that I was better than everyone else, but I'm not Finn, I'm not better than anyone because I'm a loser. I really don't care how good my singing voice is, no one wants to hear it because everyone hates me, and everyone I ever meet will hate me because I'm despicable," her voice was yelling now, and she turned around quickly so he wouldn't see her lose it. Finn wasn't sure what to say, his heart was breaking for her, he could see how bad she was hurting inside, but on the other hand, she was right in some ways.
"Rachel you can't just leave, if you do then we won't be able to go to regionals and then nobody wins in the situation," Finn tried to sound comforting but knew that it had come out all wrong. Rachel turned to face him.
"I'm not going to bail before regionals, I understand that we'll need the members, I'm not stupid Finn. I think we'll probably move over Christmas break. So there problem solved, everyone wins because I'll stay in so we can compete and then I'll be gone forever, see? Everyone's dream come true," she smirked and sat down at the piano again.
"Rachel-" Finn was cut off by Rachel's hand signaling him to shush.
"Finn I'm so deeply sorry that I hurt you. If I thought there was anything I could say or do to make you see that I love you unconditionally, well, I would be doing it but you hate me now too and I totally understand, I deserve it. So that's it, I know there's nothing I can do to get you back, and aside from that there really isn't anything left for me here, I'm done." Finn shook his head, and Rachel smiled.
"I guess you better go Finn, I just want you to know that I love you so much, and I truly am sorry," Rachel walked up to him and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek before she walked past to go up to her bedroom. Leaving Finn standing there speechless, eventually he caught up with himself and turned to walk out of Rachel's house, he looked up the stairs in the direction of her bedroom wondering if he should go up, but he had no idea what he would say to her.
Nothing is ever going to be the same, he thought as he walked away from Rachel's.
