Short Stupid Stories
A/N - These were written by myself and my sisters during random fits of insanity during last summer, or as some people call it, we were really bored. The views here are not ones expressed by us, and they are not meant to insult in any way shape or form. Just have fun
1- The execution
Once there was a man with a gun. He shot a police officer. He was executed and died
2- The pickle
Once a Quick trip manager had a poisoned pickle. He sold it to a man. the man got real sick and died
3-The car
Once there was a car. It got into a wreck and smashed up. It was made into scrape metal
4- Ouch
Once there was a dude. He got hit on the head. "Ouch" he said.
5- The dog
Once there was a dog,. He found a bone. He was real happy.
6- Bacon and sausage
Once there was a pig. He was made into sausage and bacon. He wasn't a very happy
7-Poison
Once a dog ate a rat. The rat had just eaten some poison. Stupid dog.
8-Hamster
Once there was a hamster. He fell off his wheel. It is still turning.
9- The Skunk
Once there was a skunk, He ran into a dog. Now the dog smells
10-Amputation
Once a woman found a gun. She shot herself. They had to amputate her arm.
11- Conversion
Once there was a Jew. He converted to the Catholic church. Then he became a Baptist.
12-Fire
Once there was a boy who ate fire. He died
13-Butcher knife
Once there were two kids. One shaved his head with a butcher knife. He bled to death
14- The gun
A lady saw a man with a gun. She screamed. He shot her
15- Physco
Once a man went to the doctor. The doctor shot the man. The doctor was physco
16-Aliens
"Look" said Peter "Aliens!" "Help!" said Sally. The Aliens blew up the Earth
17- Ok City bombing
A man blew up a big building. People dies. The man died
18- The Pool
"Woof" said the dog. The dog fell in the pool. The dog drowned
19- Boxing
Two people were boxing. One hit the other in the nose. The cartilenge went into his brain.
20- Drunk driver
Two people got hit by a 18-wheeler. They died. The driver was drunk
21-Wanting to
The man drunk poison. He did because he wanted to. He died.
22- Wolves
The boy was riding his bike. He got attacked by wolves. He died.
23- Coke Bottle
There was once a Coke bottle. It sat on a shelf. It still sits there
24- The Aliens speak
Once there was an Alien colany. "Phymequx?" said one Alien. "Aer Ruqlt Smu." said the other.
25- Mother
Once there was a girl. She met a boy. They didn't get married. "What not?" asked the mother.
26-1,000,000
The horse was in a big race. The man bet a million dollars on the horse. The horse lost.
27- Ebola Virus
Once there was a dude . He caught the Ebola virus. He barfed up his intestines.
28- Robin
Once there was a robin. He saw a man. Nothing happened.
29- Bomb
Once a boy put a bomb in his school. It blew up. He was happy. No School
30- Train
Once there was a girl playing on the train tracks. The train crashes. The FBI came to take her away.
31- Dots
Once there was a blue dot. He met a red dot. They made a purple dot.
32- The Baby
Once two woman wanted the same baby. They cut it in half. It died.
33- Phalk
Once an asteroid was coming straight towards Earth. The people paniced and prayed to the god Phalk. It hit Mars instead.
34-Shoes
A man put on a pair of shoes. They had nails in them. "Ouch" he said.
35-Race
A man and a dog had a race. The dog won.
36-Fight
Two people got in a fight. One of them took out a sniper riffle and shot the other.
37-Robbery
A house was being robed. The police found the robber. The robber went to prison.
38-Put to sleep
The man bought a dog. The dog bit the boy. The dog was put to sleep.
39-The dog
the dog saw a cat. He chased it. He didn't catch it.
40- Cat
A cat saw a mouse. He chased it. He didn't catch it.
41- Mouse
A mouse saw some cheese. He ate it. "Yum" said the mouse.
42- Trap
A trap caught the mouse. " Snap" went the trap. Dead mouse.
43- 107
Two people were water-skiing. One was 107. He fell off his skies and drowned.
44- Ding Dong
"Ding dong" went the bell. "It is midnight"said Bob. "No idiot, it's 2:00"
45- Invisible man
Once there was a man. He was invisible. He was the invisible man.
46- Fish
Once there was a fish. He ate a worm. He is now on the table of the man.
47- Bob's
Once there was a rat names Bob and a hamster named bob. The rat killed the hamster. There cannot be two Bob's.
48- The tree
The car hit the tree. The tree fell down. "Ouch" said the man.
49- Evil Dictator
Once there was an Evil Dictator. He got shot down. "Yippy" cried the people.
50- Writers block
At the table sat a writer. He had writers block. He went broke and died.
51- Money
Once a woman found a million dollars. It was monopoly money. "Oh darn" she said.
52- Farmer in the dell
The dog ate the cat. The cat ate the rat. The rat ate the cheese. The cheese stands alone.
53- Snow storm
Once there was a really big snow storm. The people ate each other. It was really disgusting.
54- Dying
Once a man fell from the Sears tower. He didn't die. Then he hit the ground.
55- Vampire
Once a boy met a chicken vampire. It tried to suck his blood. The next night his family had chicken soup for supper.
56- Owl
Two people had a baby owl. It grew up to be a lawyer.
57- Break-in
The police heard an alarm go off. They said, "Oh , it's only a break-in." "WAIT, A BREAK-IN"
58- Teeth
A man brushed his teeth with old toothpaste. His teeth rotted out.
59- Jimbo
"Hi, my name is Jimbo. I am dead. Wait, if I am dead..." Jimbo walked off.
60- Dumb
A man couldn't tie his shoelaces. He went to the doctor. The doctor said as advice, "You're dumb"
61- The book
Two people wrote the same book. They sued for plagiarism. The one with the owl layer won.
62- Pepper spray
Bob tried to mug Jim. Jim pepper sprayed Bob. Bob ran away.
63- Pain
Bob tried to mug Jim. Jim beat up Bob. Bob screamed, "Oh the pain"
64- physco2
Bob went to the hospital. He got shot by the physco doctor.
65- Malpractice
Bobs parents sued the Physco doctor for malpractice. They had the owl doctor and won.
66- The fan
The man had a fan. He jumped into it. He is now in may pieces.
67- Sharks
The people were in the boat. The boat sank. They were eaten by sharks.
68- Taco's
They went to taco restaurant. They had taco's. Then they went home.
69- Mobster
The man had a son. He grew up to be a big time mobster. The man was proud of his son.
70- Hit-man
The man hired a hit-man. The hit-man shot the man. "Wrong person" cried the man.
71- Ants
The ant carried the cucumber to the hole. It didn't fit, so they had tuna instead.
72- The cat
The man had a girlfriend. The girlfriend had a cat. The cat hated the man so they broke up.
73- The circle
The woman had a boyfriend. The boyfriend had a boyfriend. That boyfriend had a girlfriend. That girlfriend had a girlfriend that was the original woman.
74- Brush
The woman had a spiked brush. She tried to brush her hair. It tore off her scalp, OUCH.
75- Desert
The man crashed in the desert. He found water hole that was only a mirage. He died of depression.
76- Dolls
The girl had a doll. The doll was alive. They had teaparties, and went to parks together.
77-Frog
The frog drank poison. He croaked.
78- Tornado
The man got caught in a tornado. He went round and round and round and round...
79- Sally
Sally saw a candle. She picked it up and put it in her hair. No more Sally.
80- Bob & the buffalo
Bob saw a buffalo herd. The buffalo herd trampled Bob. Poor Bob.
81- Peter
Peter was so fat. So fat that there are not two Peters.
82- Laura
Laura had a cat. The cats name was cat. Laura was creative.
83- The cliff
"Bill fell off a cliff" Jane said. "Did he die?" asked John. "He did when he hit the bottom."
84- Joe
Joe stuck his finger in an electric socket. "Aw" said Joe.
85- Isabelle
Isabelle was a barber. She trimmed hair. How exciting.
86- The daily life of a cow
The cow was eating grass. The farmer was milking the cow. The cow was turned into hamburger meat.
