Why does it have to be me
By: Koushi
Store as data…
Must leave…
Thought…
I loved…
Record…
Memory copy…
For him…
It was wrong…
Wait…
Disperse…
So sorry…
Apply…
But I…
For…
Fragment…
Survive…
Hope…
Who…
Born was…
Away from her…I bolted up out of bed, not believing what I just saw, still quivering with some uncontrolled emotion that I couldn't quite place. I had never felt it before. Yet it was still there, still fresh in my mind, the events still spilling over into my thoughts uncontrolled. I couldn't not believe it, what had just happened, how could it still be there, it was gone destroyed with that… It has to be nothing more than a dream. Yes that's it, a dream nothing more. That's all it has ever been. Ever since that day. Everything was destroyed that day, but why was it still there, why couldn't I get rid of it why wouldn't leave me alone, I had done nothing, or is that it….
I had…
Done nothing…
Nothing to…
Stop it…
To save the lives…
Of all…
The innocent…
Innocent beings…
I had done nothing to save…
You?
I get out of bed a walk to the window. The buildings around my… our… I don't know, the dwelling I reside in now. I found the chips. I know now what really happened that day… that day that change everything. That destroyed that lives of everyone that knew how to breathe. And it was all my fault. They say that it was inevitable that nothing would have changed it. It's wrong though… it has to be. Cause everything that happens is caused by a former reaction of the same genetic material. Depending on how the former reaction is… whether it is negative or positive… and the strength of that… will determine if it will be destructive or not… I knew how this was going to end… and I ignored it… I allowed it to happen… I let it continue to grow till it consumed all it could then it went. How am I not the one to blame, it was all my fault.
I never…Blamed you…
Not once…
There's no…
Reason…
To ask…
To be forgiven…
When nothing was done…
To cause it…
The event that happened…
It was meant to happen…
It will all work out…
In the end…
I promise…
It's been a year now since that day… ever thing that happened could be prevented. Nothing good can come of it. What good can come from death and sadness, hatred and destruction. What good can come from that, none. After all I have done I can't help or protect anyone. I let you die. No one will forgive me for that. I can't forgive myself. The one person I ever loved, I let die in my arms. Who can forgive that?
There were events…That no one…
Knew was…
Unfolding…
The people that were…
Working the scenes in the…
Background…
There was nothing to be…
Done…
If you had…
Tried to stop it…
They would have…
Killed you…
I could not allow…
That…
I tried…
Succeed in…
Preventing you from…
Doing anything…
It was my fault…
After everything was done, I decided to help every one out the only way in knew how. Everything will be better I promise. I'll see you again. If you'd want me too, or I'd just live on the other side of…. I'm so sorry, was my last thought as I stepped of the bridge as the train started to just pass under neither it. Don't you see…It was never your fault…
No one ever…
Blamed you…
No one…
You tried…
That's enough for me…
You came…
While other were…
Crying…
Out to you…
I just…
Wanted to see…
That smile one last…
Time…
Just as my last foot cleared the ledge, someone grabbed me at the last moment, and pulled me back. I looked up, shock clearly written on my face. Why would someone try to help me, after what I have done? I look and it's… you? But how… I thought… I saw you… You had died in my arms. But why… Then I saw other's running up behind you. Telling me to stop, to come to my senses, to not leave them, after all that happened. Why would they still want me, after all, why I did nothing, yet… Why…
Because…It's suppose…
To be like this…
That's what was meant…
To happen…
For your mind to open…
And you can realize…
That your…
Not alone…
That everything's…
Going to be…
Alright…
