Weird idea I got in the middle of the night once and it somehow spawned this monster.
Thanks to Terry Pratchett and Dean Koonze for the million universes thing, much love to them even though I doubt either of them'll read this. And thanks to UKHoney for letting me steal a line from her.
I don't own anything in this here fic.
Kat hated some of her co-athletes. Most of the time it was along the lines of the fact that some guys still thought that women needed to be in the kitchen with a baby, or the ones who thought that they shouldn't play with the boys. Other times she hated the fact that the other females saw the end of any event as an excuse to glossy up and drag Kat out to gossip about, what else, guys, clothing, make-up, and sex (or lack of). Sometimes they would go crazy and talk about guys, clothing, make-up, sex, and how slutty some girl had been because she'd had the gall to become engaged to some guy that Tiff had been crushing on.
Kat found the whole clothing and make-up thing boring but went along anyway because it meant less time being spent in some cooped up RV bus with two guys. One who felt it his duty to call up other males, half of which were drunk, and then have mock fights or a loud party until one of the officials came over and gave them a talk. Besides, it was a great time to get blackmail on some people and to see if anyone was seeing Kat's partners as the flavors of the week.
Not that she cared if any of them did. She just didn't want to be blind-sided by waking up one day and staggering into the living room to find one of the guys with a girl, that was all.
It was slightly surprising when a year went by without anyone so much as making one peep about how cute they found any of Kat's team mates to be. Which was a bit strange as she knew for a fact that at least two of the girls had Josh posters hidden in a couple lockers and that he'd had girls throwing themselves at him before the whole N-Tek business. Berto she wasn't so sure about, though Zoë seemed to have an almost fetish about guys with glasses, but the Hispanic guy was usually cooped up someplace with no people, so the girls may not have really paid him much notice.
At least, she's wondered it until one of the girls made a comment about how it was hard to find someone cute and smart. With that Shawn has smirked and said the fateful words. "Well, that's because Kat has to two best people DOX had to offer all to herself."
And while Kat was attempting not to choke to death on her pizza Zoë made a comment about how she's always wondered what it was like with more then one guy. At that point Kat had found it hard to breath and the topic was forgotten in the attempt to get the food out of her throat.
Later that night both Josh and Berto were woken up by the sound of the door slamming and Kat turning on their lights. Berto had the good sense to get up and go into the kitchen table as soon as he saw the look on Kat's face. Josh, on the other hand, attempted to block the light with his blankets and mumbled something about how he wished that Kat wouldn't PMS when he was trying to sleep. He was kicked off his bed by Kat's left foot, his hair grabbed and dragged to the table Berto was waiting. Both guys looked at each other then leaned back slightly from the wrath of Kat they knew was going to be coming very soon.
"How the hell could you let people believe that about me?" She yelled, stomping around the RV and making gesturers with her hands. "Or why the hell didn't you tell me that people are thinking about me, about us, in that way?!" The guys looked at each other and shrugged, minds racing to figure out what thing Kat was talking about. Berto had never really said anything about his teammates that no one knew already and Josh was sure that Kat wasn't going postal over something as small as him making a comment about when she was PMSing the cat turned into a full blown lioness with cubs. Besides, she'd already gotten mad at him for that comment last week. So after Kat had blown off some steam (and she was on the other side of the room so Josh could make a quick get away if he had to) the blond haired athlete asked what the matter was.
So she told him what the girls had said.
And he laughed.
This was probably a huge mistake.
Kat might have been able to put Josh in the ICU if he had been just a little less quick. As it was, Josh managed to hole up inside the locker rooms and a couple of the other team's buses until Kat had taken the days to cool off. Of course, he also had dish and laundry duty for a week but he managed to wheedle Berto into helping him for a day (though the next day Berto threatened to send his next creation after Josh if Josh didn't leave him alone). And things would have stopped there, should have stopped there. But the idea kept grinding it's self into Kat's head making her irritated. So to cheer herself up she accepted Josh's offer to take her and Berto to Applebee.
Kat kept noticing that the people at a table near Team Steel kept giving all three of them evil looks but chalked it up to the fact that she and Josh had been trying to get each other with water. She kept thinking that until one of the middle aged women with the 1950's dress and 1960's hair slammed a pamphlet on the table between Berto and Josh. The three of them looked up, Kat feeling her temper rising gritted her teeth as Josh asked if he could help the woman.
"You should be ashamed of yourselves, all three of you together?" The woman snapped, Kat made gurgling noises and Berto gave the woman a cold stare. Josh, damn him, seemed amused by the whole thing as the lady called them lost lambs and began to rant about how they should repent before the devil came to take their souls away. People were looking over, some openly laughing or pointing and Kat just prayed that none of them had a cell phone that could take pictures after she heard someone ask if it was really Team Steel.
At that point, Kat slumped down in her chair, put her arms on the table and hid her head in her arms. "I order someone to kill me now." Berto awkwardly patted her on the shoulder, which seemed to just set the woman off again about how sweet and kind they must be and how all she wanted to do was help them. Finally even Josh was feeling tired of the whole thing.
Of course, what he said didn't help matters at all.
"Haven't you ever heard of free love?" He demanded of the woman, who's jaw dropped open and as she stuttered. Before she could make any more remarks though Josh had quickly kissed Berto, then Kat, both who looked at their teammate like he'd gone crazy then attempted to hid from the collage kids cheering and catcalling and the older people looking absolutely shocked. The woman looked at them, tears starting to form in her eyes and Kat decided that she had gone though to much that night. Grabbing her coat she stormed out of the place, having to put up with a couple of comments by the collage kids, half of who had started to clap and pissed Kat off a bit more. Once outside she noticed that Berto had followed her and they stood by the car waiting for Josh to emerge though Kat was very tempted to hotwire it.
Very tempted.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo
Berto knew that people tended to overlook him, or just shrugged him off as the geeky guy who kept the rest of the team from killing each other. Even before Kat had joined Berto had been the one making sure that the people he was looking after managed to not kill the other. Sometimes he even had to save them from the villains, though that was becoming very rare.
He'd been overjoyed when paired up with Max, as the new agent was close in age and Berto had been feeling a bit lonely. They had become pretty close, going so far as teasing each other about girls and stuff like that. Berto's favorite thing to tease Max about had been their third teammate. He'd thought that since Rachel had just gotten out of an relationship the topic would be safe, as no one really rebounded that fast.
So he was beyond shocked when Rachel had kissed Max.
Berto had been angry when his best friend's relationships with anyone outside of work fell apart because of the kiss and Rachel didn't seem to care. In fact, she hadn't even had the decency to come and say good-bye to the boys before moving into a larger office. So what if she now had to travel the world more often and was busy reading mission files and sending agents out? She could have at least attempted to keep contact with the boy whose life Rachel had all but ruined.
Max hadn't been as mad about it as Berto had, which stood to reason as usually the agent was calm when it came to stuff that would have had most people yelling and hitting things. But after a while Berto managed to forgive Rachel and had even been the one to make the cake for her surprise party before the blond haired agent transferred to Asia.
It was right after they'd gotten the joy of having a new partner that he'd started to notice things about Josh. Not Max, who everyone inside N-Tek was paying more attention to, but Josh. Weird things like the brand of shampoo he used (Head and Shoulders), how many times a day he combed his hair, and what pants of Josh's were going to have to be thrown away soon. Little things like that, all which pointed to one fact; one that Berto really didn't wish to think about. The one thing in the world he knew for a fact that his family would never forgive him for.
He never said anything for that reason, that and the fact that it wouldn't have done anything but break the whole team up even more and he couldn't really do that to his good friend. Maybe from time to time Berto might have felt a slight pain his heart but people went though much more so he figured he could deal with it.
Besides, their new partner was a complete legend at N-Tek. Entire coffee breaks could be used u on telling how Kat Ryan had managed to take on an entire building by herself using just her basic equipment. Or how she's managed to drive her newest partner away or even how when she's first joined men had taken a pool on who would date her.
The pool was dropped after one of the more strong minded men ended up with a sprained wrist that didn't heal for months. After that and a few rumors about the sort of weapons that Kat had hidden in her locker people tended to look the other way when she was in the room and in a bad mood. Well, almost everyone.
Berto couldn't count the times he'd been forced to play peacemaker with Max (or Josh) and Kat. Sometimes it got so bad he would think wistfully about the times that he had been stuck in a little room with nothing but random machines for company. Though once the whole thing had blown over he usually managed to get a free soda or donut out of the deal or Berto would be able to trick the other two into helping him with a new project.
He at first wondered if the only reason he saw Kat as attractive at all was because she was so much like their other team member. But there were things he noticed that had nothing to do with Josh (or most other males) and while Josh might make Berto feel a bit giddy, Kat was starting to make him get tongue tied. Sure, she was the first girl he ever lived in an house, let alone an RV with, which made it hard for him to avoid her (or Josh, if Berto really wanted to be honest with himself.)
He had been so wrapped up in his own thoughts that Berto never really gave much thought to the rumors flying around about the three of them At least, he hadn't until being trapped by a couple of the females at DOX, all who demanded to know what was going on for sake of gossip. His response hadn't been clear, more along the lines of "Er.. um.. Who told you this?" than a clear and definite negative. Berto kicked himself for weeks after that, wondering why he could have just told the truth, the truth was easier and wouldn't cause any trouble for anyone in Team Steel if it got out.
But then again, the truth wasn't something that he sometimes dreamt about late at night.
He kept silent about the entire thing however, once he saw the way his team mates would look at each other sometimes when they thought no one was looking. Or when Josh was going around shirtless or Kat had on some sort of form fitting wetsuit. The manager knew how these kinds of things ended. The hero always got the girl in the end; the sidekick would sometimes get something worth money. No one ever cheered for the guy in the background to get the princess, no on ever cheered him on unless he was racing away from Nazis or something along those lines. And besides, Berto had always been told that one of the signs of true love was being able to just wish for the love's true happiness; something that he was going to do with all of his heart for both of them.
So why did it seem so unfair, and why did his heart have to jump like that after being kissed as a joke? And why was he trying not to blurt out his feelings, all of them, to Kat as they stood in the parking lot, waiting for their friend and team mate to come out?
OoOoOoOoOoOoOo
Josh couldn't help but be amused that the other two looked slightly irritated when he stepped onto the parking lot. Ok sure, so maybe they were going to end up in the gossip magazines next month but it wasn't as though anyone took those things seriously. Besides, it wasn't as though either of them had resisted all that much until after the clapping had started.
"Can we go home now?" Kat snapped as she threw herself in the car and crossed her arms. Berto was looking out the window as he cleaned his glasses and for the first time Josh worried that maybe he had gone a bit too far. He'd been caught up in the moment, happy that he could do all of that and just put the whole thing off as a joke but hadn't even wondered how the other two were going to feel. And it looked as though they were not happy about being kissed at all.
Josh sighed and turned on the car wondering what he could say in order to get the other two to start talking again but was saved by Berto asking about dessert and Kat reminding him that they had a whole gallon of ice cream in the fridge and she hadn't bought the whole damn thing for herself, he was the one with the bottomless pit for a stomach. Josh sighed, happy that things had managed to get back to normal but at the same time wishing that it wasn't, and that nothing would ever change for years.
Ever since he'd been four Josh had feared that everyone he'd known would somehow be taken from him. He had spent countless nights lying in bed trying to hear his adopted father's breathing and fearing to get up and see that something had happened. That somehow Josh was left alone all over again.
In fact that was probably the whole reason for getting hooked up with Laura. They'd been friends since fourth grade but during the end of middle school he had felt her pulling away. Pete had been in some classes along with Josh and both could go off and do guy stuff, but Laura had started to almost realize that she was a girl and that her two best friends weren't. so all though the first year of high school she would stop by in time to scarf down her food and then Laura would be off with other girls to do whatever it was that girls did. Most of it seemed to be giggling whenever Josh would walk by (or any other guy who wasn't a loser or Pete). And Josh had felt sad, knowing that someone he'd once been so close to was slowly getting farther away and soon would just be someone to look at in the year book and ask what had ever happened to them.
Junior year she asked him to the Sandy Hopkins dance, because the guy she'd wanted to ask was really a jerk and she didn't want to be the only girl without a date according. But during the dance they'd talked and danced, had so much time having fun that Josh had told her that they had to do it again, not thinking of how it had come out until that night when Pete had called to demand a reason behind Josh getting a girlfriend and not telling anyone beforehand.
Not that dating Laura had been bad, he had a lot of fun hanging out with her but couldn't see them together in the years to come. But she had been so cheerful, so happy to have him by her side at every date and they'd begun to make plans to move in together as soon as college started, plans that were stopped by Jeff telling his son that he would live together with his girlfriend when Jefferson was dead and in his grave.
Josh hadn't seen what a bad idea it had been to date someone he just didn't want to lose until he had joined n-Tek and found himself with someone he was attracted to. The kiss had been the last note of the relationship, no matter how hard he tried to make the whole thing work it would have blown up in his face. Laura had left for a year and Rachel has transferred, leaving Josh to deal with losing two people he'd cared about.
At least he still had Berto, though Josh was worried that he was going to destroy that also. He'd been slightly jealous after Kat had arrived and seemed to have gotten Berto's attention in ways Josh was sure the younger agent had never noticed people before. Alright, maybe he was a bit more then a little jealous of Kat's presence at first, mostly because he could see her somehow taking Berto away just like those girls had with Laura in high school. But she was fun to be around with, someone to play basketball with or compete alongside of. And it wasn't as though N-Tek was going to go anyplace, legally neither of his partners would have managed to leave Josh alone without loads of paper work.
At least they wouldn't have until the FBI shut the place down.
First chance he had Josh had invited the other two to live with him in a house, after all without a job they couldn't pay rent for apartment anymore. And it had been sort of nice to have other people around whenever Josh came home. The going back into sports thing had also been great though living in an RV was a bit cramped at first. Josh was slightly shocked the day he realized that he thought of them as a family, and that he didn't want them to leave not only because he had a weird fear of losing everyone; but he might be slightly attracted to both of them.
But it couldn't be possible; no one could be attracted to people so different unless they were just trying to convince themselves of the fact. Besides, the two of them were always making eyes at the other and it wouldn't be right for Josh to step in between them.
So he had just flirted with them, careful to keep the whole thing in a joking matter. Kat just blew the while thing off or would jokingly flirt back while Berto would blush or just seem to not notice. Josh usually hoped for the former, mostly because it was so much fun to tease the younger man about how cute it was. But kissing them wasn't just a small flirt, he could have just driven to team apart and it wouldn't have been fair to anyone.
Josh tried to forget the whole thing for the next couple of days, had even managed a laugh when his dad had called to chew him over the gossip magazines with their photo shopped pictures of Team steel. Even Kat had allowed herself to laugh at the images of her face on a Baywatch body though any reporter who dared ask if any of the news was true usually got the sharp side of Kat's tongue. And months later the three had been able to laugh about the entire subject, mostly to tease Josh about his kissing skills and him telling them that it took two.
The whole thing should have gone on just like that, and in millions of universes it did. In thousands of universes none of them ever dated anyone else in the team. In millions of universes they ended up living their days like the rest of the world, in millions of universes they grew out of the sports world and drifted apart, in a million others they stayed in touch and would sometimes get the kids together and talk about when they themselves had been young. In one possible universe they all died the next day from a freak accident involving a rock slide and water. In millions of universes this story was short, a bit more boring, and would have had no point.
In a couple universes the story kept going.
In this universe Josh wondered why it was that crazy people with plans to destroy the world that day kept showing up around him. It wasn't just cyborgs and crime lords anymore, at the moment the goon of the week was just a sharp shooter who was angry about his favorite team coming in behind Team Steel.
The sad thing was that he seemed better at keeping Max or Kat away far better then most other people they had fought; this including trained mercenaries. In fact Josh (or rather at the moment, Max) was about to shout out that how much training from the crazed fan Psycho needed when a bullet hit his chest and came out the other side. Or at least he hoped that it had come out the other side, his back was feeling like it was on fire and he didn't want to have Kat attempting to dig the bullet out. 'So this is what it feels like to be shot in the chest' Max thought to himself a bit hazily, he could hear Berto yelling something about shock, energy, and bleeding. Even the guy shooting at them seemed shocked at the sight of blood, he'd paused long enough to allow Kat to grab the gun and smack him in the back of the head with it.
The wound was starting to feel better, though the fact that his vision was blurring more was a bit worrying to Max. He tried to reamber what one was suppose to do after getting shot but the only memory of his First Aid class was Rachel glaring at him and telling Max that she better not be wounded while partnered with him. Kat was pushing him to the ground and ripping his shirt apart, it had been a birthday gift and he really hoped that his dad wasn't going to be angry about the blood stains.
"You are not going to die," Kat half snarled as Max blinked sleepily up at her. So that was it then, he was really leaving this world. Crazily he wondered if perhaps Josh should have done more things; take his overworked parent to dinner or tell certain people how he felt about them for starters. Well, perhaps he could take care of the latter idea.
"I really like you…. Both of you," he managed to mumble though numbing lips. "Could you tell Berto how I feel?" Kat gave him an annoyed glance, grumbling something about him not dying now would he just shut up and let her see how bad the wound was? Max tried to smile bravely up at her, he didn't want her last thoughts of him to be of him throwing up, bleeding, and possibly urinating all over the place. The world was getting darker and he wondered what was waiting for him on the other side.
He opened his eyes to whiteness and wondered if this was heaven, only to be suddenly hit by the noise of beeping and the realization that he was laying down in some sort of bed. Josh wondered why the afterlife would have beds; at least he hoped it was the afterlife, other wise he was going to have some explaining and covering up to do.
"Don't even think about it Josh," someone said from his left, causing Josh to turn his head over and look at a smirking Kat. "You've already said it to the entire world. We're not going to let you get off the hook." Josh blinked at her, feeling his cheeks slowly warming up. "And by whole world I mean that everyone who has visited has had to go though your ramblings about the wedding and kids. I'm not having five kids, if you two want five kids you or Berto can carry them."
"Are you going to let her do this?" Josh whined at Berto who just grinned and offered some juice.
"And why can't I have on a white gown for the wedding? It's not going to be a puffy thing but it's not as though the universe is going to end by me in a white dress. And isn't someone in Berto's family allergic to flowers? We could get fake ones, and he can put on a white tux, everyone knows he can have on white for our wedding."
"What?" Berto went bright red and begun to stutter out a denial of being able to have on white for the wedding, Kat countering with him needing to show proof of that fact causing Berto to go even redder. Josh leaned back as the argument got louder, causing someone in the next room to yell at them to shut up.
He grinned even wider when both of them kissed him (though a bit sheepishly) on the lips when the nurses came in to kick them out.
Maybe deathbed confessions weren't all that bad.
He just hoped that Jeff wasn't going to have an heart attack once they told him the good news.
