Well you see I've been pondering a few thoughts lately: Why is Saito's life always on the line? (aside from the whole Wolf of Mibu) What would happen if Saito gave Kenshin marital advice? And many other questions that I have answered with these comedy acts. The first is Jeff Dunham.
Saito and Kenshin on marital advice. I DO NOT OWN RK OR JEFF DUNHAM! thank you and please review!
Kenshin: Saito?
Saito:ignores
Kenshin: I know you gave up on our fight but isn't ignoring me a bit cold?
Saito: walks away
Kenshin: -sigh- SAITO!!!!!!
Saito: -notices that Kenshin has now gathered a crowd with his yelling- Did you say something?
Kenshin: Finally...what are you doing here in Tokyo?
Saito: What, can I not come back or are you here to send me away?
Kenshin: -arrogant ass-
Saito: What was that?
Kenshin: Nothing...
Saito: Tokio wanted to come back to Tokyo.
Kenshin: Say that five times fast.
Saito: Say it and you'll be pushing up daisies.
Kenshin: Oh touchy today aren't we?
Saito: Honestly I don't want to be here but Tokio is visiting her sister. So what are you, my stalker?
Kenshin: Aw The Wolf of Mibu can be tamed. And no I would rather stalk an actual wolf.
Saito: Now who's touchy.
Kenshin: Shut it, I came to you for advice actually.
Saito: Oh really? On what, how to actualy make it with a woman?
Kenshin: NO! I actualy have a wife but I need advice since we've only been married for a mounth now. And your the only person I know who's married.
Saito: So Battousai actualy comes to the Wolf for advice and on his own wife none the less.
Kenshin: Saito, try to be serious. I have never backed down from a battle but-
Saito: Yeah I know, no one is MORE dangerous then ones own wife. So what you want to know what it's like?
Kenshin: At least your being descent.
Saito: I never agreed. But come to think of it I am a little hungry.
Kenshin: Y-y-y-ou! YOU HAVE A JOB AND YOUR TRYING TO TAP FOOD OFF ME!
Saito: Oh well I hope you enjoy your daily beatings from the Raccon.
Kenshin: sigh Fine. To the Akabeko.
Saito: Now he understands.
-At the Akabeko-
Kenshin: So fill me in.
Saito: It's no secret mission. I'm just going to let you know what it's like.
Kenshin: So the wife has it her way?
Saito: Most the time. So Tokio brings me back to this god forsaken hell hole. I can die happy now.
Kenshin: You seem so angry at your own wife. Arguement this morning?
Saito: Yeah she rolled out of bed jumped on her menstral cycle and ran my ass over.
Kenshin: But she's having a good time right?
Saito: Yeah.
Kenshin: Good-
Saito: Pisses me off.
Kenshin:Uh... How long you been married?
Saito: 15 years.
Kenshin: Well when was the happiest time during that period?
Saito: 16 years ago.
Kenshin: Well I have a mounth down.
Saito: You'll see.
Kenshin: So what?
Saito: Remember when you said 'Till death do us part?'
Kenshin: Yeah.
Saito: Pretty soon you'll realize you were setting a goal.
Kenshin: Saito what is marriage to you?
Saito: Well it's like drinking a slurpie: the first couple of sips your like, oh this is pretty good. Then another couple of sips and it goes straight to your head then your like, ow ow OW! The hell was I thinking?! Someone kill me please!
Kenshin: Well it eventualy stops hurting.
Saito: Then your dumb enough to take another sip.
Kenshin: Wow.
Saito: Your life will never be the same.
Kenshin: Why?
Saito: You can't look, touch, speak, breath on,or even think about other women.
Kenshin: So?
-Cute woman walks by-
Saito: You see that cute woman?
Kenshin: Yeah.
Saito: Nice Looking?
Kenshin: Yeah.
Saito: See her?
Kenshin: Yeah.
Saito: Oh well...
Kenshin:hmm
Saito: The only thing you can do now is run to the end of your chain and bark.
Kenshin:-sweatdrop- Only you Saito.
The End for now.
A/N: I'm sorry Saito is so perverted but the part was perfect for him. Tell me what you think and I'll post new ones for other characters.
