Life is haunted

Rose has finally caught up with Dimitri and is in the forest running from him. Set after shadow kissed.

"Rose, why do you run?" Dimitri yelled.

"Why won't you leave me alone?" I countered.

"Ah, Rose always the same."

"I wish you were the same."

He stalked towards me and I tried to retreat backwards, keeping my eyes on him. His red, glowing, Strigoi eyes.

"We could be the same, Roza."

"How do I get your soul back?" I stared into his eyes trying to see the old Dimitri.

He laughed the sound so cruel and humourless it made me shiver.

"No Rose, Don't you want to join me? Eternity together, Really together, forever."

I shook my head afraid to open my mouth, knowing I would say 'yes'.

"Then why did you come, my Roza?"

"I made a promise to you."

"I was crazy asking that of you."

"I was crazy agreeing to kill you."

"Because you still love me." Dimitri stated.

"But you don't love me." I insisted.

"I think you're beautiful." He said longingly and sincerely.

"That's not the same thing though."

"Have you forgotten everything I taught you? You're stalling. I told you don't hesitate. I could have killed you many times over. You're not distracting me."

Suddenly he had me pinned against the tree, I pulled out my stake and moved it so the tip pointed to his heart. He seemed scared for a second and then it was gone.

"Dimitri, I hate how they made you, you were such a good- no great guardian. You were the best and that's not even why I loved you."

I stared into his eyes and I couldn't do it. He was the love of my life, even if he was making that life a misery. I couldn't kill him. Somewhere, someone could save him. I hoped they could. But that would take time and right now I was cornered. I didn't have time.

He smirked thinking I would give in. For a brief second I wondered if he was always secretly this arrogant and just hid it well, Always struggling for control. He probably was, nobody could be that badass and god-like without knowing it. But then he spoke and I knew he wasn't my Comrade anymore.

"Oh Rose, Don't be so pathetic. You're not going to do it so don't even pretend. When we're together we can rule the world... We can take down our enemies. Lissa can't control you anymore. We could end the Dragomirs! Everyone who every wronged us will pay!"

So I did what I had to do to save Vasalissa, as always and I pushed the stake through his heart, the heart I loved the most in the world.

"I love you, Dimitri. I love you so much, so so much Comrade."

He fell to the ground and I knelt beside him, cradling his head. Slowly his eyes returned to brown and he spoke in a rough voice filled with pain, pain over losing his life or his love or maybe the physical pain – I don't know and I never will.

"I'm so sorry Roza, I love you. Be careful and don't do anything reckless. I'll never forget you, my strong Rose. You kept your promise. Thank you... I just wish... It wasn't this way. Love you. Always."

And then his eyes closed and he was gone. Silent tears fell down my face as I held him to me.

"Dimitri... No! Why? Why?!?! Dimitri....Comrade, why you? Whys life so unfair? You should know! I want you to tell me! I need your stupid Zen comments! Come back! Dimitri..." I cried, I yelled and I screamed at his lifeless body but nothing happened.

Sometime later people came and dragged me away. I yelled his name over and over and clung to his body but they tore me away. I fought them all but eventually strong arms were pinning me to the ground and I couldn't fight anymore. So I screamed as loud as I could.

They dragged me back to a car and the voices were familiar but not wanted. Guardians from the Academy. When I was sitting in the back of a sedan the let me go and I cried out Dimitri's name over and over. The car stopped and then started again, only now Adrian Ivashkov was sitting beside me. I didn't care and kept crying and screaming for Dimitri. He sat there watching me until I was shaking from the sobs and my throat ached. He finally looked me in the eye and did something I never expected him to do, something he said he'd never do.

He used compulsion. He looked straight at me and spoke calm and clear.

"Rose, you need to stop. You will stop. You will sleep until we get back to the academy. I don't want you to scream anymore. So you will stop."

Then, I couldn't help it, a black fog drifted in front of my eyes and I fell asleep on Adrian's shoulder. He carried me into my room at the academy and I cried. He left me there and I cried more. I cried because I was alone, because Dimitri was gone, because I killed him but mostly I cried because my heart was broken. So broken I couldn't even love Lissa anymore.