Affection's Betrayal
By Kathryn
Rating: Themes are definitely M
Dis- I don't own any Cruel intentions characters, I'm just borrowing
them for the time being.
Summary:(Alternate ending: takes place where Sebastian has just
broken up with Annette and now is asking Kathryn to sleep with him)
Kathryn and Sebastian are on more aggressive terms since the
incident with Annette. Nothing good can come from these two warring
sibling, and nothing does.
Love. Hate. And a Thin Line.
Sebastian's POV: Kathryn's Room
"But unfortunately for you, I don't fuck losers "
And with those words the final nail closed forever my coffin of delirium. Everything I had ever built up with Kathryn was shattering before me. Of course there were head games and manipulations between us, who was better at the game, but really it wasn't just a game. I cared about Kathryn, behind every game we played I always thought there was a deeper connection, something there that was special perhaps. But I was wrong, I was just another toy to Kathryn, well fuck her. I may be a toy, but a deal is a deal and she wasn't getting out of this bet if my life depended on it. I'll make you so sore princess you won't be able to walk for a month, you'll regret calling me a toy, and when you do finally finish the bet I'll toss her out on her ass.
Catching my breath I said menacingly"Cut the shit Kathryn, you have to the count of three to get your ass in that bed."
I said pointing to her four post canopy , for a brief moment I wondered how many other guys she had spread her legs for there before, I bet none of them had to pull all the shit I did just to bang her. Of course they were also under the misconception that Kathryn was as pure as the white driven snow
"One, Two..."
Her lips curled into a cruel smile, "Three, let me remind you Valmont, you missed your shot" stepping closer allowing me a full whiff of her perfume.
Swaying her hips ever so suggestively, my mouth hung at her words, though how she had such a hold over me was truly puzzling. I am Sebastian Valmont for God's sake, the most cunning son of a bitch there ever was and ever will be. I had always believed I was capable of handling myself around women, but Kathryn was pure seduction one second with her and I would be instantly turned on much like I was at that moment.
She arched her eyebrows and rested her hand on my groin "Tense?" she asked mockingly, nuzzling my neck she leaned in closer to my ear. She licked and sucked on it slightly before speaking in a low venomous tone, "Too bad, Now get the fuck out of my room" after which she turned on her heels and went into the bathroom.
Her seduction tactics, though the greatest I've ever seen a woman have, couldn't begin to rival what else she was capable of. Playing with people's minds and manipulating everyone around her was impressive to say the least, but to take MY heart and grind it to resemble road kill, was truly something.
Yes, she had really screwed me over, I'm sure you've heard the tale. My one sure chance of happiness laid with the only one who ever really cared about me... Annette. Ugh... just thinking about her makes me ill, well to be more accurate thinking about what Kathryn made me do to her prompts the nausea. The worst part is..it wasn't entirely Kathryn's fault, this was poetic justice at it's best. To finally fall for the girl and fuck it up all thanks to my pride. Annette was my chance, my one chance to escape this contempt and emptiness and for that out, I loved her dearly. I could be happy with her, but Kathryn and I...well whatever it was I had thought we had, I believed was worth throwing happiness away for. Yes in the end I think I always would have chosen Kathryn, the ice bitch from the upper east side, sad to say I thought she and I were two of a kind, I was wrong, so very wrong.
Growing angrier by the second I yelled out "Fine War it is!" then slammed her door shut, hoping to regain some dignity. Still, I felt empty I needed to get out so with what self-respect I had...which wasn't very much if any I quickly stumbled out of the town house into my jag. I didn't know where I was going the thought of Annette crossed my mind but I couldn't face her...unless.
For hours that afternoon I sat in the park contemplating if I was actually going to do what I was. Finally I returned to the townhouse. Coming down the hall I heard Kathryn's voice.
"It's Sebastian...he's ..oh god..", she said with a faux fear voice. Hmm, what was my darling little sister up to anyway. Eavesdropping really was an unbecoming habit but curiosity got the better of me. Leaning into the door I listened-
"Ronald...He's out of control...he hit me and took off... I'm scared to be alone please..." I was stunned to say the least, I heard the clank of her phone being hung up and debated whether or not to enter the room. To hell with her what could Ronald do anyway, besides if I went in there now it most likely end in a screaming argument, the last thing I need now was a headache I had to focus.
I started to walk away, but of course I couldn't resist turning back I opened her door just as she was "powdering her nose", god how I hated her little habits. Disgusted I sighed, she stopped and looked at my reflection in her mirror. Our eyes briefly met, I expected a cold glare, however this time...her eyes were softer than usual..not cold, but semi- regretful.
Rolling my eyes I grumbled at her "Why don't you stop that shit?"
"Why don't you fuck off?" she asked, her cold demeanor returning.
"Why do I bother with you at all?" I sighed and turned away.
"Bother with me? As if you cared in the first place, oh come off it Sebastian you are aware that we're in the middle of a war, you let your guard slip and start to care, you lose. You taught me that as I recall right after I told you...forget it just get out."
"Fine, I have to get back the woman I love." Sighing I left her room and returned to my own.
"Dammit Valmont you do not love that mousy little middle class hick from Kansas!"she bursted through my doors.
"Don't pretend to even think you know how I feel. I do love Annette and I am going to get her back."
"Declarations of love never entered your head before, what's Dorothy gonna do next to change her beloved? I think we're looking a long term of community service, church, and dare I say celibacy." she laughed. "Poor Sebastian" she advanced with a cat like prowl "Handed his balls over to the bible thumping virgin"
"Get the fuck out"
"Sebastian don't be so mean, I just came to warn you..." she said while straddling me. Dammit, why did she have to be this close to me, I had to get her away from me.
"Ok you warned me" I smiled and pushed her off "Now Please get the fuck out"
"Oh Sebastian...you used to be so much fun" getting to her feet she leaned in closer to me, "don't you want to have some fun?"
"Not interested." I grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her out of my room, hell if she was going to accuse me of abuse I would take full advantage of it.
"Now if you'll excuse me, I have a letter to write." Tossing her out into the hall she fell slightly behind, I had a mean streak running through my veins, instead of helping her I laughed, " And you know what your right I don't love you, I never did, Annette was the only one and I won't let you fuck it up anymore than you already have"
I smiled confidently, this was a game and I was not going to lose.
She looked hurt searching for words, getting to her feet she huffed violently "You don't believe in love!"
"No dear sister that's you, you don't love anyone and that's why no one will ever love you."
"Don't be ridiculous Sebastian, I'm adored. Worshiped even, whatever you and Goldie-locks have it's never going to last, you can be damn sure I'll see to that. If it takes everything I have I'll ruin your so called love. " She was shaking slightly, and the way she had threatened me seemed more of a self conviction for her, but the words resounded in my head.
The next thing that happened was completely unexpected and slightly blurry. I didn't even realize that we were that close or the intense stares Kathryn was casting toward me, however before I could come back with a witty retort Kathryn almost completely out of character kissed me hard and urgently.
I returned it, but I was more confused than ever. She wanted me? She hated me? I was a toy? But that kiss wasn't a game, it was real, or at least to me...I wanted it to be real.
She pulled back slightly and looked up into my eyes, I could see what she was thinking before she smiled, that cold calculating smile.
"All's fair in love and war brother, and if it's war you want, it's war you'll get. You hate me right now, but sizing that bulge hitting my leg at the moment tells me that in the end you'll always go for lust. She'll ruin you, and you'll break her heart all over again. I won't even have to lift a finger." Her words would have been cruel and harsh if it wasn't for that slight tremor in the back of her voice. Her words held half the normal confidence she usually possessed.
I wasn't sure what to make of any of this, the arguing, the head games, that kiss "Look I don't want to be at war with you" I started, momentarily slipping into the old routine of making up, but looking at her expectant face, I hardened recalling her "toy" remark, not simply that, but all the other times I had forgiven her for something, and she would turn around and screw some more with me. I wanted to be done being her whipping boy.
With that, my anger returned and I started to lash out, " No, I don't want to be at war with you, but apparently that's all we've ever been good at, I'm tired of it Kathryn, and I'm tired of you. Annette was special, she was my out of a world that you existed in, you and your games. I used to think that you were beautiful and sexy, the ultimate challenge ,but face it honey at the end of the day you're just a pathetic coke whore with a sadistic need to ruin your own life and everyone else's around you."
I had never seen a look quite like the one I received from Kathryn at that moment, for a second I wanted to go to her. It was in that second all masks were off and looking at me with wide green eyes her expression was enough to make my knees weak. I regretted what I said instantly and went to touch her shoulder. She was looking at the ground now.
"No...D-don't touch me" she said bringing a hand up before I could make contact
"Kathryn I-"
"I don't want to hear it, just stay away from me" with that she turned to go back to her room.
I reached out and grabbed her wrist pulling her back to me, but she would have none of it, she turned and pushed against my chest violently.
"Let me go Sebastian!"
"No!"
"God damn it Stop!" she tugged back.
"No!" I held on, and continued to yell "I'm sorry" as if it would erase what I had said. I was sure I had seen something in her eyes, I had hurt her, but that had meant that I had meant something to her. I wasn't a toy, she did care. I wanted her to care so badly, and I wanted these games to be over finally, I waited expectantly to hear what she would say.
She went limp in my arms and I relaxed my grip,"You're sorry?" she shook her head and looked up at me, "You asshole, you're sorry?!" she yelled, then in a quieter more vicious tone she narrowed her eyes and said lowly "How dare you" she turned and started to walk away.
I grabbed her wrist once again to keep her from leaving, but she pulled away and slapped me, at which point I stumbled backwards and gaped at her in surprise. She made her way to her room and slammed the door, locking it behind her.
I didn't know what to do or what to think, at that moment I was torn between wanting to be done with Kathryn Merteuil forever, or using all my skills to get her back.
Sitting at my desk I realized either way I had a letter to write...
A couple minutes later I was done. That should do it...I must admit it was a little on the sappy side but I had no choice I had to get Annette back. I had to tell her the truth, the bet, Kathryn, and everything else. I had to give her my journal. If anything she would now know who I was whether or not she could love me again was up to her. I had never let anyone read it ever not even Kathryn though she pretended to care less, I knew she was dying to read it. "My journey to Manhood" more or less a score book, but the truly interesting thing about it was her. In my journal was a tribute to the woman I thought I loved and everything I loved about her, the things most people would never know.
---
O'Shea's Residence (Annette's Current living Estate)
"I need to talk to Annette."
"She's not here" the middle-aged middle-class woman replied not the least bit interested, but instead rather annoyed by the fact that I was interrupting her party.
"Do you know where she is?"
"She's out"
"Do you know when she'll be back?"
"Later. Listen, we're entertaining some guests so-"
"ANNETTE!! ANNETTE!"
"Young man I already told you she's not here"
I wanted to scream, kick, whine anything that would let me talk to her, but I knew that would only make things worse.
"Fine. Could you please see that she gets this."holding my journal and the letter I had written for Annette.
"I'll do that." she replied taking the objects.
" It's really important"
"I understand. Good night" She said closing the door.
Now...for Kathryn... If I was going to take her down it was going to take everything in me. Kathryn was by far my most difficult adversary. She was ultimately the most challenging opponent I had ever had, having called all my sources already, there was of course only one other place to go.
"Well ,well if it isn't the pussy-whipped Sebastian Valmont" Blaine quipped as he opened his door and shut it behind him folding his arms he asked with a slight trace of malice "What do you want?"
Noticing his cold front I pondered what crawled up his ass or rather who, I smirked to myself, but in all curiosity what was wrong, then it hit me...Kathryn.
Damn she was fast how the hell could she turn Blaine against me in only a few hours?
Sebastian sighed "So I'm guessing Kathryn stopped by for some product." I rolled my eyes.
"No, but I did get the most interesting phone call, So tell me Valmont since when do you hit little girls?"
"Blaine you don't know what the hell you're talking about. I never touched Kathryn." I rolled my eyes and turned away from him.
"Yeah, well I know it was you who fucked Jessica freshman year."
..I didn't have an answer for that one, it was true before Blaine came out of the closet so to speak he was dating Jessica Montgomery the cutest girl in high school my conquest days were just beginning in fact Jessica was the first actual challenge I had. Sure there were other girls before, and I had already gladly given up my virginity to a Junior during the summer beforehand, however since Jessica was in "love" with Blaine, I actually had to work to get into her pants.
"Oh for fuck's sake that was more than what? THREE years ago, besides YOUR GAY!!"
"So what?!" he asked angrily, "Her brother beat me up everyday after school thinking it was me that stole his little sisters purity!"
That was true David Montgomery Jessica's older brother and at that time Senior would meet Blaine at his locker and kick the shit out of him till Blaine transferred to Appletons all boy Academy.
"Hey now I didn't plan it to go like that if anything it was all Kathryn's scheming"
He gave me a questioning look.
"It's the truth, I wasn't even aware that Jessica had an older brother, when I did find out. I freaked thinking David would come ooking to kill me. Kathryn said she would take care of it... Apparently you were her immediate target when you chose Jessica over
her...she planned the whole thing"
He seemed to think about it for a minute then looked at me again with a small smile that seemed to play on forgivness. "That's sounds like our fucked up little Princess..."he rolled his eyes "So what did you do?"
"Excuse me?"
"Well she must have some reason for wanting me to well hate you" he coughed, then opened the door "come in by the way"
I entered fully aware that he checked my ass out as I did..that was the one thing awkward about my acquaintance with Blaine
"Hold on for a minute"
He walked out of the room but returned just as quickly bringing out two joints. I smiled, but I knew I had to refuse, I needed a clear head if I was going to take Kathryn down.
Instead of the joint I beckoned for some coffee, he shrugged and then complied. Lighting his own joint he brought back the cup.
I took the coffee mug from his hand and laughed at the image of a ken doll taking it from behind by another guy, on the side of the cup.
"Could you be more queer?"
"What it was a gift." he insisted sheepishly.
Laughing I set the cup down on the coffee table next to a manila envelope.
"What's this?" I asked picking it up.
"Oh just something I was supposed to research for Kathryn, actually she wanted me to research that right after she told me about you and Jessica, I don't really get what the big deal is.."
"May I?"
"Be my guest, hell if I do her any favors for a while."
"What is this ...medical records?"
"Yeah, just another mental that happens to be pushing 40" he sighed
I turned the page to find a photo clipping of quite possibly the only other woman in my life who had truly cared about me my mouth gaped open in surprise.
"...my mother?"
Blaine turned quickly at my statement. "Your mother?! Olivia Pritchard is your mother?" he seemed to choke out.
He stared at me with surprised eyes, his mouth gaped open, and a flicker of guilt passed through his eyes. Now Blaine wasn't the most moralistic person so I knew something was definitely wrong.
Again he left the room leaving me to ponder what the hell was going on.
This time he came back with another manilla envelope pulled out the papers and handed them to me, the papers were identical, only the second one contained fake recordings of foul behavior enough to get her re-institutionalized. I realized just what this report could do to my mother and again I felt ill.
"...oh my god...that sick sadistic bitch!"I began to pace back and forth with new found anger rising, my blood stirred heavily I was so angry my hands were trembling, "There's a line... THERES A FUCKING LINE KATHRYN" I screamed, "This is my mother..." I took the paper and ripped it up looking back at Blaine I asked if there was anything else he gave me a reassuring look, with that I stormed out to my jag...Kathryn was dead so help me god she was going to pay.
Throwing open the door to my Jag my cell phone began ringing, I contemplated ignoring it but that damn ring along with my already jagged nerves was too much to handle, I answered it angrily, "Hello?!" as soon as I heard the voice on the other end I calmed down somewhat,
"What is it?...You did...Ok great...Who the fuck cares?... That's the point dumb ass!" I rolled my eyes, "No I don't give a damn how much it costs just do it Dammit, Tonight! No Better yet Yesterday!" Hanging up I threw my phone to the ground. It was about time that bitch paid for everything. With a new sense of self and a thirst for revenge I headed home, to repay and deal with Kathryn.. It was with that in mind everything went black
---
Annette's POV
What was happening...? Everything was right. I love you Sebastian, and god how I hate you. Did you hurt me on purpose, what am I saying of course you did. You love someone else? Your such a coward.
I cried. I cried and I cried. I couldn't feel, my body felt so numb I was shocked to say the least. Then a knock was on my door. I really didn't want to answer that.
"Annette? Honey is everything allright?"
"Yes ...I'm fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, Mrs. O'Shea I'm just tired."
"Ok dear"
I didn't feel like talking ...I was so tired. This day couldn't have just happend. Wake up annette wake up.
I drifted to sleep for what felt like hours, but woke when I heard a loud voice that sounded all to familiar I stood up and walked to the hall and sure enough he was there...Sebastian. I hid so he wouldn't see me, what was wrong with him why would he come back?
I pondered this for a few minutes more, maybe he was going to tell me it was all a mistake that he did love me. I was about to go and tell Mrs. O' Shea it was alright when she knocked on the door I could tell then it was too late Sebastian was gone.
"Here dear...some strange man left these for you" looking worried she added "You might want to watch the people you hang out with down here, its not like Kansas" smiling she stated "I would hate you to have a negative experience here in New York, your such a sweet girl."
I smiled politely and took the items. "Thank you Mrs. O' Shea"
As she exited I headed toward the queen sized bed and set what looked like a leather bound book down on the bed, I opened the letter and read...
Dear Annette. Thank you for reading this letter. I don't know what I
can possibly say to rectify the harm I have caused you. For once in
my life I'm at a loss for words The truth of the matter is that
being with you was the only time I have ever been happy. My whole
life has been a joke. I prided myself on taking joy in others'
misery. Well, it finally backfired. I succeeded in hurting the first
person I loved. I wish more than anything I could take it back, but
I guess that's not possible. Enclosed is my most prized
possession... my journal. For a long time I considered it my trophy.
A sordid collection of my conquests. If you really want to know the
truth, then please read it. No more lies.
Turning to the journal I again paused momentarily thinking even if I wanted to know the truth, carefully I opened the book and was immediately intrigued.
---
Kathryn's POV: Right after Sebastian Declared war the first time.
"Did he really think I was going to fuck him? After that stunt he pulled yesterday, I'd sooner suck Mr. Johnson the English teacher off for an hour speaking of which my grade is a little lower in that class." pausing I thought about the last time I gave him a blow job. Frowning at the memory I recalled how he came all
over my school uniform. Sighing I continued my rant.
"I don't care how good he looks not while he's still in love with her."
"..Kathryn, I don't mean to interrupt-" Jen cut in.
"Then don't!" I spat quite annoyed, looking over at Jen, who had been one of my oldest confidants I sighed. Her exasperated expression, made me more than a little upset, with a wave of my hand I dismissed her.
She had come to my beck and call a little over three hours ago, this of course after I called Blaine to do a little research and tampering.
Cautiously she exited the room. I walked up to the door which she left open much to my annoyance. Slamming the door shut I yelled extremely frustrated.
"Dammit Valmont you weren't supposed to fall in love! You didn't believe in it...just like me. Till that virginal hick showed up..." I threw my hands up in the air and fell on my bed...why was he getting to me so much?
"Dammit"
Well at least I got the last laugh, you are nothing but a toy Sebastian and now you know it. Sure a better toy than any other I have had, but still a toy. I could never love you. I don't believe in it, and you could never love her it would destroy you. At least I could have rescued you from yourself.
Sighing I thought of my next plan of attack...damn it was cold in this house an eerie cold it never ceased to amaze me how lonely it could be in my semi perfect world, now that Sebastian was gone..would it ever be warm again? Damn...I'm thinking about him again.
Doesn't matter Sebastian can go screw himself for all I care, I don't need anyone...just a warm body I smirked.
"Hello...Ronald..?
"Yeah?" he replied in a half-asleep voice...that was good he was going to need his rest for what I would do to him..
"It's Sebastian...he's ..oh god.." I choked out with false tears.
"Kathryn?"
"Ronald...He's out of control...he hit me and took off... I'm scared to be alone please..."
"Calm down...its alright I'll be right over"
"There's more..."
I unraveled the entire story of how Sebastian fucked the innocence right out of Ronald's true love after he reassured me that he would come I hung up, this was going to be better than I thought I smiled in victory. I think I deserve a little something for a job well done. Getting up I went over to my vanity and unlocked a secret compartment underneath the second drawer, I smiled at the white powder emptied the small baggy on the desk and made a line with the edge of a birthday card I received almost two years ago. I opened the card..
Dearest Kathryn,
Roses are red
Violets are blue
sooner or later
im gonna fuck you.
Love Sebastian
P.S.: Happy birthday, I hope you like ballet.
I smiled at the memory, that was a day I would never forget, soon after our parents wed he had made me his next target in hopes that our parents would divorce. I was harder than he thought though and ever since he has tried... I had often wondered why I didn't just give into him it wasn't like I didn't want to...just he was
different..eventually I knew I would give into him, but I knew I would never let him go after that..then she came... My smile faded thinking about that night he took me to the ballet...it was one of the best nights of my life..and the first time I ever kissed him... now it was all slipping through my fingers well I'll be damned if I let it...the coke line seemed so good right now, little did I know I was being watched, till I saw him in the mirror.
Oh God, all of what he had said. It was like I meant nothing to him. In those moments I despised Annette so much. How could she have takenso much away from me, the only thing that even mattered to me. I understood how he must have felt when I called him a toy. It all felt so helpless now even revenge against him didn't sound appealing. Honestly I just wanted to get away.
I was able to once my mind was elsewhere. Ronald had come by soon after Sebastian left. I just wanted to let everything go, which thanks to Ronald's surprisingly great tongue I was able to for a few moments. It had been at least three hours since I last saw Sebastian. Well screw him then if he wanted Annette let him have her. I smiled, he would bring them both down faster than I could, I'll just let "love" run it's course then when he comes crawling back I'll shut the door on his ass.
"Ms. Merteuil It's your brother!!!" Mai Lei shrieked coming in the door.
"Mai Lei!!!" both Ronald and I jumped up at the small Cambodian woman.
"Oh Ms. Merteuil!! Your brother has been in an accident!"
"WHAT?!"I grabbed the phone from her.
"Hello?... Yes I'm Ms. Merteuil...Sebastian Valmont?, yes I know him he is my Step brother"...I paused I knew something was wrong when I received the call. My bones were chilled and I couldn't feel anything...oh god Sebastian...
"Yes...ill be right there."..I didn't know what to say, I handed thephone to Mai Lei, then stared off in space I shouldn't have saidanything to him this was all my fault if I didn't say anything he wouldn't have left...god I cant deal with this...no I can...Im Kathryn Merteuil this ..is just another challenge that I will conquer.
"Oh...God.." Ronald said waking me from my thoughts "what did we just do?" "Huh?" I asked oblivious to the fact we just spent the last few hours fucking each other's brains out.
"I have to go..."
"Excuse me?"
"Kathryn, I love Cecile, this was a mistake I have to go ..I'll call you.." he said as he left...normally this kind of thing would have pissed me off a great deal however I didn't care my mind was still on Sebastian.
I had to get to that hospital ,twenty minutes later I was leaving to go. I took my time in getting ready, hoping if I did then it meant that it wasn't as bad, I suppose I was trying to convince myself that he was ok. Though I couldn't think at all the only thing that crossed my mind was Sebastian who was hurt and though I should be rushing to the hospital I was home slowly getting ready. I suppose this was my way of dealing attempting not to show fear but remain calm and confident, the truth was I had to keep calm or I would shut down completely.
AT THE HOSPITAL-
"Hello I'm Ms. Merteuil, Dr. Rosenburg called me earlier, I'm here to see Sebastian Valmont." I said with a calm voice again to keep from breaking down.
"Yes, he is in ER, it was a drunk driver, he's touch and go right now." the kind nurse said, however the words hit my heart...or the black emptiness that resided there. I still couldn't help but feel that it was indeed my fault...but why would it hurt this much.
"Mr. Rosenburg!"...I saw him Sebastian's fateful doctor all Sebastian could be from now on rested in this man's hands..."How is Sebastian?"
"It's not looking too well, we are taking him to another section of the hospital for surgery, it would normally be a mild concussion however the spinal cord is varying, he might not walk again."
"Not walk again?!"...I didn't care I had to just let go I wanted to scream and I almost did, but Dr. Rosenburg was called away, that there was something wrong with Sebastian.
"Please, excuse me...try to be calm, I understand how this is extremely terrifying but I assure you if there is anything I can do I will be sure to do it."
By now routine had kicked in, I straitened myself and looked him dead in the eyes. "You will be sure to do your best."I said with a very sharp trace of malice, he knew I was threatening him on behalf of Sebastian's life. With that he left, a slight look of terror in his eyes.
I found a chair a second later...I needed to regain some consciousness of what was going on, Sebastian was hurt, I could do nothing I hate this feeling, no control.
"Dammit!"I shrieked. The nurse looked at me, "Miss are you alright?" I smiled simply, "Yes, I apologize, he is my only brother, and I don't know what to do." I found some crocodile tears somewhere...they might have even been real tears, but I decided to play the sympathy act. "Oh dear.." the nurse of course had bought it then walked around the desk she was sitting at to comfort me...god this was truly pathetic.
"Have you called your parents?" the nurse asked. Why like they would care? No, of course mother would say how horrible it was, and that it was all Sebastian's fault, and Daddy Dearest would listen to her ranting and escape to his yacht where one his many bimbos would be waiting for him. My happy little home was seriously fucked up. "No...they are in Tahiti...I'll go..."
"Ms Merteuil? Ahem Ms. Merteuil" Dr. Rosenberg was calling me "Sebastian is in room 213, you may see him, we found that his spinal cord was not severed he will walk again, however he has not woken up from his coma, the longer he sleeps..."
I didn't want to hear it. "Yes I understand" I cut him off quickly. He nodded.
"Thank you, I will go see him now." I turned to walk away.
"Oh Ms. Merteuil your parents?"
"Yes...um" I really did not want to call my mother and spend thirty minutes on the phone... I just wanted to see Sebastian. "Would you please call them..." I fetched the number out of my purse "please I just want to see my brother." she nodded and took the number.
Room 213 he lied there.. behind this door. I felt the doorknob, the cold steel hit my skin and at that moment I felt more empty than I had ever felt in my entire life.
Behind that door was truly a nauseating sight, it was as if he wasn't hurt at all a few scratches, but the way he lied there so still, as if he were just sleeping taunted me.
Walking over to his side every fiber in my being was wanting to just to touch him, with that incentive I felt his hand on mine whether he moved or I did I really didn't know. My guess, it was me seeing as how he was in a coma after all.
"Sebastian..I'm sorry..."looking down at his semi-fragile face I realized I didn't care anymore, I truly was sorry, and more than anything I just wanted him to wake up.
I sank to my knees and looked at his slightly banged up face, touching it lightly I was truly scared and lost for words. I just held his hand tightly.
There is such a thin line between power and pain, life and death...love and hate. Somehow I had found myself walking such the lines, like on a high rope, and every step forward I found three steps back, I was slipping.
"Sebastian...I-"
"Oh my god, Sebastian!"
I turned in time to see Annette Hardgrove push me out of the way and rush to Sebastian's side, I almost out bursted, but then Mr. Rosenburg interrupted.
"Excuse me, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask both of you to leave, while we run some tests on Mr. Valmont, I assure you that there will be ample time to be with the patient when we are finished."
She nodded, got up and kissed Sebastian's forehead, I felt nauseous. Then we exited the room.
Looking over at her I could see what Sebastian found so interesting, she was completely pure, even after he had popped her cherry she had an aura of complete purity, so caring, and loving truly intoxicating.
She looked at me with an uncertain look..what was that about, I decided to break the ice.
"Have we met?" I asked with a fake smile, that still showed my sympathy for Sebastian.
"No I don't think so"
"Did you know Sebastian well?"
"You might say that"
"Now I remember Annette Hardgrove, your father is the new headmaster at Manchester"
"That's right" she said in a cold tone, I really wasn't sure what her problem was, I barily even met her and already she was being more of a bitch than I was, if that was possible.
"I'm sure your going to love it there"
She nodded, I almost had enough so I flat out asked her, "Are you ok?"
"I will be, once Sebastian is safe."
I nodded solemnly, then got up.
"Well I'll leave you alone now to see if the doctor's have any more news"
"Thank you"
I looked at her, she seemed so helpless, but at the same time her eyes had a hint of fury in them.
"Look, I know this sounds corny, but whenever I feel like I can't go on I..."I started, taking out my crucifix, "turn to Jesus and he helps me through the problem. Call me an anachronism, but - "
"Oh cut the shit, Kathryn"
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me."
"Who the hell do you think you are?!"I was outraged, nobody talked to me like that!
"Kathryn, I know all about you and Sebastian."
"Sebastian is a pathological liar. I wouldn't believe every word he-"
"I have his journal."
"You what?" his journal, oh god.
"His journal. He sent it to me. Everything about you is in it. The blow jobs, the hand jobs, the menages, your bout with bulimia, the affair you had with your guidance counselor and how he gave you... eww. Let's see, then there's your coke problem... You still keep it in your crucifix, don't you? It's all in there."
"I don't believe you!" I said trembling.
"It's the truth." she said while taking out an oh so familiar leather bound book, she handed it to me.
Finally I opened it, I had been dying to read that damn thing, however not exactly like this...it couldn't be true, Sebastian couldn't have despised me this much, however flipping through the pages I saw it all, everything he thought about me.
"How could you Kathryn?"
I didn't say anything, but slowly I looked up at her and a real tear ran down my face, and I clenched the journal.
It was then I caught a strange look in her eye that I couldn't quite figure.
She reached for the journal and I held it tight, that's when it hit me the stupid cow forgot to make a copy.
"Give it back Kathryn, it's futile I already know about your awful habits!"
I regained my composure and smiled, I can't believe she just handed me over the journal the one bit of evidence she had.
"Oh it's so sad when we don't get our way" I laughed, she looked so pathetic at that moment.
"Give me the damn journal Kathryn! It's mine Sebastian gave it to me!"
"Well, I don't see him anywhere, I don't think Sebastian is stupid enough to give something of this stature to a stupid cunt like you, what would he say if he knew you just handed it over to me-"
"He would say give me the damn Journal." a familiar voice said.
Annette and I both turned to the voice, it was him it really was, he was in a wheel chair, but he was fine. However the way he was staring daggers at me told me he was anything but pleased.
I resisted the urge to run to him, which is precisely what Annette did, and he gladly received her, something told me I wouldn't get the same reaction.
"Annette, I'm so sorry, I know you can't forgive me I just wanted you to know-"
"Shhh...it doesn't matter your ok...and I do forgive you, I love you so much"
"I love you too."
"Ahem" I interrupted.
Sebastian turned to me with utter disapproval, it stung the way he looked at me, that loving and admiring glare was gone the only thing I saw now was contempt.
"Well, as fun as this has been, I've had enough of a soap opera evening." I turned and started to walk off.
"This isn't over Kathryn!" Sebastian yelled I looked back as he attempted to get out of the wheelchair, but stumbled, once again I had to resist the urge to run to him, but Dorothy was there to help.
"Sebastian, calm down your not at full strength" she said lovingly.
I betrayed my feelings and started to laugh, but ended it abruptly "Your right about one thing Sebastian, this isn't over" my eyes went strait to his "Not by a longshot." I ended it there and swiftly walked out of the hospital clenching the only thing I had of the old Sebastian his journal.
I stepped into my limo only to find that the driver had taken off, damn new employees, well this one would surely be fired immediately, after waiting for ten minutes I stepped out of the car and began walking. Not really sure where the hell I was going I knew I couldn't just stay at the hospital.
Stumbling into darkness I lost all track of where I was going, it had been approximately one hour since I started this small journey of mine. Somehow I had managed to find a park bench my feet were so worn, mental note: never take a walk in stilettos. I looked back at the journal, is that really what Sebastian thought of me, was I really that low to him. I hadn't even noticed it began to rain.
"It's rather late miss are you alright?"
The voice startled me, looking up I saw what appeared to be a middle aged man in a trench coat sipping coffee.
"I'm fine" I said none too convincingly.
"Where are your parents? A young lady such as yourself shouldn't be out so late alone." he said with a sympathetic tone that was getting on my nerves.
"I said I was fine"
He looked at me oddly then looked around .
"You can leave now." I said flatly wishing he would go away.
He continued to stare as if contemplating something, damn perv sighing I got up and started to walk away.
As I brushed past him he grabbed my wrist suddenly and spun me around bringing a cloth to my mouth..breathing it in everything faded out.
What the hell was happening to me? Where was I? My eyes fluttered open, though everything at first was blurry I saw what appeared to be a fireplace with a fire going. I looked around the room, slowly the effects of whatever I was under wore off and I could see clearly. It appeared to be a regular townhouse, let me rephrase that a regular middle class townhouse. Sitting up I tried to think of the previous events, declaring war against Sebastian, talking with Blaine, talking to Jen, calling Ronald, fighting with Sebastian, fucking Ronald, and then getting that fucking phone call, seeing Sebastian lying still like that in the hospital bed...I could feel the tears welling up in the back of my throat, swallowing my tragic emotion I looked around to see if I could remember anything else, hell I've resisted the urge to cry for this long, I wasn't about to appear weak now. Then something else... that man in the park. I tried to move my hands and legs but they seemed to be bound
together, damn what did I get myself into this time.
"So I see you woke up."a voice cleared its way through the silence.
"Huh?..who are -"
"Shh this goes by a lot faster if you don't talk"
I heard footsteps coming closer and then finally stopping.
"You're a sick little girl you know that."
"Excuse me? You tied me up!"
"Well according to this you don't mind being tied up as much as you say you do."
Holding up a book I recognized easily as Sebastian's journal.
"Where did you-?"
"Kathryn, I told you not to speak."
"How did you know my name?...oh wait the Journal all right so you know all about me-"
He began to laugh, it was a dark and eerie laugh that made me shift uncomfortably.
"What is so Damn Funny?!" I yelled seeing as how I was completely confused and pissed off.
"You are precious." he moved closer this time I could see his face I gasped, my mouth gaped wide...no it couldn't be...it just couldn't.
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