(A/N: Hello out there. Remember me? Yeah, I'm still alive. Anyways if you want to know about PCMH or New Purposes, those will be updated soon. I've had a lot going on in my life(lie) My computor has been messed up (lie) okay i've been lazy... very lazy...
About this: this is going to be around a 3-shot... and... it's based off of real events so it's surely to suck XD anyways... have fun? Read away :) )
The Break Up. Or... The End of Life as I Knew It.
You might call me dramatic for saying that being broken up with could end my life, but honestly... it can. It's pretty difficult to understand if you aren't in my shoes. All though it is completely cliché, let's flip back about, say 10 hours ago... to the morning of the end.
-12 hours earlier at 0700 hours military time—
Massie watched her MacBook Air, which sat peacefully on her lap, blasting away The Lazy Song by Bruno Mars and she smiled at the silly parts.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah," sang Bruno Mars from the laptop, his dick slanging away. Massie giggled even louder.
"I love that part," she smiled before setting down the laptop on her clean and precise desk.
"Yeah," I smiled and slowly put in my dangly earrings. According to Massie, long dangly earrings elongated your neck and could make guys go crazy, and, like always, Massie was right; whenever I wore these earrings, the afterschool kisses from Cam were longer. I reached my sweaty nervous hand into my own tight pocket to retract some lip-gloss that didn't even seem important. It is swiped easily across my lips in a fluid motion and my focus slowly shifts from "how big Bruno Mars's dick is!" to Cam. My pupils must have morphed into little black hearts at the thought of his gorgeous lips that at times seem slightly parted or unimportant but can always draw me in.
I can't stop marveling at how perfectly my lips connect with his. I think to the night that Massie convinced us to sneak into Scream 4 and while she sat happily next to these two kids from our school that moved to our neighborhood, Zach and Robbie, I had the wonderful endowment to be so close to Cam. His lips met mine in a wonderful embrace and moved together in a complicated dance that could only be described through our vivid memories.
The moment is erased in my mind as Massie's shrill voice chirps, "Kuh-Laire? Have you decided to change your name to Neil?"
"No?"
"Then why are you spacing out? Isaac's here... come on."
"Alright," I said happily.
-1 and a half hour later at 830 hours military time—
I pass by Cam after 1st period and it's the first time I see him today. His hair is completely perfect, dark and shiny as always. I nearly swoon.
"Hey," Cam smiles and hugs me.
"Hello," I smile. The moment quickly becomes awkward... like always. My mind is blank and fretting about what I could possibly bring up. These things are way too complicated. He walks me in silence to my first period. Awkwardness hangs in the air like a stuffy parent watching our every move constantly lecturing me, "are you sure you should be standing so close to this young man?"
We reach my class and I smile at him as a parting way, not being able to hug him in front of my French teacher.
-2 hours and a half later at 1100 hours military time—
I lean back in my chair, taking time to appreciate the view I have of the back of Cam's head. It's finally the class we have together and he is smiling, showing off his lips. I think about the perfection of quirky in his lips: his top lip sticking out a bit further than his bottom lip but I still love both of them equally. His mouth always seems to have a small twinge of a smile. I notice his eyes that are focused on the Promethean Board. I smile at just the thought of him. I've finished my notes for this slide so I let my attention drift again onto the seas of Cam.
I shift back to that movie night. It's almost half over, but Cam doesn't notice so I expertly let it slip that "the movie is almost over."
"Guess I'll have to make my move now then." His eyes are hopeful and lustful.
"Guess so," I flirt back. His face moves to mine and immediately our mouths begin their journey of each other. His hand reaches around to my face. Sly fingers stroke the bottom of my chin where usually I'm incredibly self conscious; I really dislike the extra fat that seems to love being stored there. Yet, he makes this fatty resolve feel beautiful, special and for once I'm proud of it. Our mouths continue to acquaint with one another.
A new slide appears on the Promethean Board and I have to shock myself back from my wonderful memory.
-4 hours later at approximately 1500 hours—
Cam kisses me before I board my bus and pure bliss encompasses me. This bus ride will be good and it has to be because I kissed Cam.
Finally, when I reach my home of Massie's guest house, I text Cam. He doesn't respond... yet.
-1 hour later at 1600 hours—
Cam finally responds. His message is very simple, yet menacing: "Can we talk?"
I try not to freak out. He isn't breaking up with me. He isn't breaking up with me. He isn't breaking up with me. I repeat my mantra and it takes him forever to respond. He could be asking me to the upcoming formal dance. He's stupid and doesn't realize that a message like that could freak me out. He isn't breaking up with me. He isn't breaking up with me. He loves me. He wants to be with me. He kissed me today for crap's sake! He isn't breaking up with me. He isn't breaking up with me.
I get a message.
"I think we should just be friends." I read it again. It hasn't changed. Oh, I'm dreaming it's all okay. I pinch myself: not dreaming. He's breaking up with me.
I can't help but respond: "Why?"
Tears flood my eyes. They cascade down my cheeks and I feel like screaming. They flow menacingly, laughing at me. I try to find my phone. I need help. I think of two people that I know can help me: Massie and Layne.
"Matt broke up with me. Over text," my message reads. It sends. I openly sob to myself in my room. Nobody is here to comfort me or tell me it is okay. My throat catches on a sob.
I get a message.
It's from Layne. "WHAT THE FUCK? THAT FUCKING ASS-HOLE! WHY?"
To answer her, I get another message. It's from Cam. "I just think we should just be friends."
I can't help but sob even more presently. Dread and misery fill me. I can't believe that he doesn't want me anymore. He kissed me today! How could this happen? I shake of depression. An empty hole replaces my happy heart. I lean back and sob more. I try to take confidence and respond to Cam.
"Alright. But, I'm not going to be your friend. Not if you break up with me over a text message," I respond finally naming to him what he was doing. I text Layne what he said.
I get a message.
It's from Cam. "Okay whatever." I can't even see because the tears are too big and there are simply too many and I can't think. I turn my head over onto my pillow and continue to pity myself and sob more and more. Only questions fill my head and I follow the snake winding down the pit of despair. The pain in my stomach and chest open up as a sign of feeling unwanted. I wasn't needed or loved anymore. I didn't want to hurt like how I did and I didn't want this feeling.
Layne tries to comfort me but it's all for nothing; I can't be comforted. I want to beg for him back, but remembering a tip in seventeen, I promptly erase his number. I will not talk to him. No. The emptiness of my chest rocks my body. My mom comes home. Crap.
I take several long deep breaths and wipe off the tears from my eyes. I try to look like I'm not crying but when she enters the room she can tell.
"Honey, what's wrong?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Tell me, sweetie."
"I'm fine."
"Honey! Tell me what's wrong! Please!"
"I'm fine." I look down, away from her worried eyes. She tries to send me a comforting smile but finally leaves the room. I collapse onto my pillow and cry myself to sleep.
-2 hours later at 1800 hours—
In a daze I awake, and check my phone. I have two new messages, one from Massie, looking quite a lot like Layne's, and another message from an unknown number. I look at the number and somehow I realize it's from Cam.
"I did this over phone because I didn't want to see you cry."
BULL FUCKING SHIT! He just assumed I'd cry? Anger and sadness fill my body and I reach for my laptop when I see something that would surely help me. What I see is just a name. A perfect name.
Taylor Swift.
-Now—
So far, I have done one great thing. I've downloaded about 10 perfect Taylor Swift songs for this occasion. I blast them from my iPod and continue to cry some more. The pain may have subdued a small amount, thanks to Taylor and my friends. Dylan was the first person to say that I should smack him. I had no idea that 6 other people would say the exact same thing.
After seriously considering skipping tomorrow, I talk myself out of it. I'll be fine. Tomorrow is a new day, and surely Massie will be able to get everyone to hate him. Tomorrow is a new day with new promises but I can't help but continue to cry to myself.
An hour later I finally get to sleep: a long, utterly dreamless sleep.
(Review? :) )
