A/N: Hello, this isn't my first fanfic, but it IS my first published one. And the pairings won't happen until the later chapters, as the first few are definitely more of humor than adventure/action.
Please review! Reviews are yummy! o
Disclaimer: Definitely don't own Harry Potter, and definitely never will. Kinda wish I did, though.
Any questions, or spelling errors, or something that suddenly relates to Star Wars? Email Month as an Animal
Chapter I: The Return of Redheads Two
Year Seven at Hogwarts+Voldy attacks+Seven Horcruxes+One Pissed Phoenix+Draco Malfoy+Two Weasley Twins chaos.
So thought Dumbledore as he watched Hermione, Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Neville stumble off their carriage, almost running into Draco, who had returned during the summer, and upon the near-collision, they had started to hurl insults at each other literally, writing the words in flaming letters with their wands and, with a flick, sent them crashing into each other. The seventh year Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were only too eager to join in, and soon words erupted into curses, which are far too unpleasant to be named here.
(see chapter 2 - when it comes out - for the full flashback / memory type on how Draco returned)
Dumbledore smiled even wider as he saw Snape heading in their direction. He smiled at the two redheads beside him.
They commented,
"So, Professor, we thought that--"
"We'd just try our newest products--"
"But they might cause Year Seven--"
"For Harry and co--"
"To turn into chaotic--"
"Disorganized--"
"Wild--"
"Harmful--"
"But nonetheless fun--"
"Last year," Fred finished.
Dumbledore smiled. He approved the idea, earning him a yell of outrage from Snape, including a stream of curses from him and Draco.
McGonagall shook her head, already laughing. Flitwick was trotting up to the small part of swamp that had been there ever since the ban of Umbridge and the exhile of the twins. Sprout flicked her wand, and flowers rained from the sky. Even Peeves greeted the two twins.
--------
Harry poked at his breakfast. He was covered in bruises and minor burns, seeing as the words were on fire. But, he thought, looking over at the black-and-blue Malfoy and all the other Houses, it had been well worth it. Then, suddenly, NHN (Nearly Headless Nick) popped up in the middle of the table, which resulted in all the new first years (at least twelve of them;) screaming at the top of their lungs. One boy was nearly crying after NHN popped through his toast and marmalade.
Dumbledore was outside, conversing with the two twins. "Now, are you completely sure that there are no side effects? No permanent changes?" he asked seriously while trying to keep a straight face after he had heard what their new product was supposed to do.
The twins replied, "Of course not--"
"Although there may be a bit of wild--"
"Chaotic--"
"Hairy lessons--"
"Everything should go well."
--------
Dumbledore walked into the Great Hall as the students were still eating the main courses of breakfast. "Attention, all students!" he called.
Silence.
"I will not be responsible for anything that happens to the school after this morning!"
More silence. No, take that back -
"What the HELL?"
"What's he yannering on about?"
"What's going on?"
"SHUT UP!"
"No, YOU SHUT UP!"
"SILENCE! Now, after those few words of wisdom, it is time for the first-day-back special dessert - Magical Animal Cookies!" Dumbledore announced after screaming 'silence'. He waved his hand, and platters piled high with animal cookies appeared.
Hermione immediately took a small cat that looked as if it could have been Crookshanks himself. She tried it, and commented, "Hmm, it's not too bad! It's pretty good!"
Harry had already scarfed down his owl cookie, and Ron his. Ron started to complain. "I feel sick..."
On the other side of the Hall, two hundred and fourteen people (the Slytherin House, to be exact) screamed in unison, along with a girly-girl shriek from Snape:
Draco was a ferret.
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Well, that's the end of the first chappy. Hope you liked it, 'cause there's more to come. Please review
