Charlie: Err... this really isn't anything more than just over-dramatic accounts of silly things that happen while I play, or while I watch my dorm-mates play the beta. The chapters really have nothing to do with each other... and uhh, I'll randomly add every time I see/do something silly. Yep, so enjoy.
The Man Cannon
It was a typical day for Steve. The hot alien sun bore down upon him as he manned his station. It had been a slow day, but they would come, like they always did. Those Red hooligans and their fancy buggies. Steve let his finger trace the trigger of his turret. This time though, he would be ready for them.
Soon he heard it, the roar of the Mongoose's engine. They would be here soon, and once they got here, Steve would blast them into pieces. Steve readied his trigger finger as a cloud of dust appeared on the horizon. His breath shortened as adrenaline pumped through his veins. He felt no fear, only a heightened sense of things.
The vehicle carrying those Red clad barbarians drew near. For a split second, Steve's vision blurred, but the man had no time to think. He trained his cross hairs on the advancing vehicle and pushed the trigger.
The turret whirled to life. Round after round of deadly shrapnel flew from the barrel at high speed, racing towards their target... only to slam into an invisible energy shield mere meters later. Steve gasped in surprise as he realized the blur in his vision was due to nervousness or adrenaline.
Some punk had put a bubble shield around him. He turned around only to feel the butt of an assault rifle smash into his chest plate. Without thinking, Steve wildly swung his portable turret, connecting several times with his target. When he regained his vision, the lifeless body of his assailant lay in a pool of his own blood. For good measure, Steve trained his turret on the body, and released the remainder of the pitiful amount of bullets left in the gun into the body. Cursing his failure, Steve made a quick retreat.
It would be a few minutes later when the command from base was heard. The Red Hooligans were making a retreat. Steve once again stood at his post, this time carrying a standard issue Marine Sniper Rifle. He lifted the gun and pointed it beyond the horizon. From his scope, he could see the Mongoose making it's mad trip backwards. But it would be no use, soon, both the passenger and the driver would be dead, and these silly raids would finally come to an end.
Steve aimed his rifle carefully, his steady hands following the zig zag of the crazy driving. Steve slowly inched to his right to gain a better vantage point. His cross hairs were trained. The amount of lead perfect. He placed his finger on the trigger, waiting for the perfect moment. The Mongoose came into range. Steve stepped over a little more to make sure he doesn't hit the rocks. One step... two steps...
Suddenly, Steve saw his vision rip upwards. His rifle no longer pointed at the Mongoose but the peak of the mountain opposite him. Then he felt the rush of air and his flailing legs, no longer touching the ground. He turned around and saw that one of those blasted Reds had placed a man cannon right where he originally stood. Cursing those trouble makers, Steve tossed his sniper rifle away angrily.
But unfortunately for him, Steve soon found himself approaching a rather hard and unforgiving looking tree trunk. His eyes widened as he braced himself for impact. His lips let out but two words.
"Oh... bugger."
