Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to Pokèmon or Big Brother
Before we get on with my 2nd FanFic I would like to say a few things, 1st, most of the Pokèmon in this FanFic will be made fun of somehow, some more than others, 2nd, I have never seen Big Brother but I have read about it, 3rd, this will be what you guys call a "one-shot."
And now, I give you for your reading pleasure, Pokè Brother!
Week 1,
Host: Welcome to Pokè Brother! We have 10 fine Pokèmon contestants (9 are legendaries) competing for $1,000,000,000 and here they are! Our 1st contestant is…Regigigas!
Regigigas: I'm Regigigas, and I'm so big I needed 4 cargo planes to get here!
Shaymin: That was LAME! Oh, and I'm Shaymin.
Host: Next up is the queen of dreams, Cresselia!
Cresselia: W00t! GTBH! (Glad to be here!)
Manaphy: She's talking l33t again! Oh, I'm Manaphy.
Host: Who ordered the thunder? Oh yeah, I did.
Pikachu: Hi people! I'm Pika-(pees) not again!
Regigigas: I see why they call him Peekachu!
Everyone else: SHUT UP!
Host: We have a hothead coming! It's Heatran!
Heatran: MOVE IT (BLEEP!)
Host: Nice to see you too…We now give you the king of nightmares, Darkri!
Darkri: What's up?
Cresselia: Oh Noes!
Darkri: She's still l33t.
Host: Now please welcome, the masters of space, time, and distortion, I give you Palkia, Dialga, and Giratina!
Dialga: Want to have (BLEEP!) with me, Palkia?
Palkia: for the 5689376943rd time, NO!
Dialga: How about you, Giratina?
Giratina: I don't mind gays, but gay perverts are different!
Pikachu: (Pees again) I really need a diaper, or at least a bigger bladder!
Manaphy: ooooooh yeah, you can pee on me anytime you want.
Everyone else: o.0
Host: oooookay, please pay attention to me, if you look to your left you'll see the confessionals; you can use those to talk without having the other contestants know what you're saying.
Confessional, Pikachu: I think I'll get kicked out early, due to my (pees) bladder control problem…
Confessional, Heatran: I'M GOING TO WIN!!!!!!
Confessional, Dialga: I want to (BLEEP!) Palkia!
Confessional, Darkri: I'm not here to win; I'm just here for the heck of it.
Host: On your right, you will see your rooms; each one is customized for you.
Confessional, Manaphy: I was so stoked when I found out that my room was filled with water! Even though pee would have been better… did I mention I have a pee fetish?
Confessional, Cresselia: W00t! ILMR! (I love my room!)
Host: Rest up! Your 1st challenge starts in 2 hours!
(2 hours later)
Host: Welcome to the silence challenge!
Heatran: WHAT?!
Host: Relax, this is easy, the last one to talk is the winner, and chooses the 2 Pokèmon to be voted off.
Confessional, Pikachu: This will be easy; I once went 95 days without talking. (Pees)
Host: There are just a few rules, no attacking, no tickling, sneezing doesn't count as talking, and same goes for coughing, farting, and burping.
Pikachu: What about peeing?
Host: That too. And the challenge starts in 3, 2, 1, NOW!
(37 seconds later)
Heatran: I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!
Host: Heatran is out!
Confessional, Heatran: THAT WAS THE WORST 37 SECONDS OF MY LIFE!
Pikachu: (Pees)
Darkri: Eew.
Host: Darkri is out!
Darkri: Oops…
Cresselia: W00t!
Host: Cresselia is out!
Cresselia: IWWI! (It was worth it!)
Shaymin: (sneezes)
Manaphy: Arceus bless you. (Arceus is to Pokèmon as God is to Christens)
Host: Manaphy is out!
Manaphy: Woops…
(84 minutes later)
Host: We're down to just Pikachu and Regigigas
Pikachu: (Pees)
Giratina: Someone get some Urout™!
Billy May's Ghost: Hi, Billy May's Ghost here with Urout™.
Regigigas: Even as a ghost he still advertises…
Host: Pikachu wins the challenge!
Pikachu: All Right! (Pees)
(Later)
Palkia: Who did you pick, Pikachu?
Pikachu: I picked Dialga and (Pees) for the love of Pete, can someone get me a diaper!?
Shaymin: Who else?
Pikachu: Heatran.
Host: Everyone but Dialga and Heatran, go to the confessionals and vote off either Dialga or Heatran!
Confessional, Pikachu: I vote for Dialga, he's a pervert.
Confessional, Cresselia: DIAP, HSG! (Dialga is a perv, he should go!)
Confessional, Darkri: Heatran's harshing my mellow.
Confessional, Palkia: Dialga*1000!
Confessional, Giratina: Dialga. Gay+Perverted=Bye-Bye!
Confessional, Shaymin: Heatran's too scary!
Confessional, Manaphy: Dialga would (BLEEP!) anything that has a (BLEEP!)
Host: The votes have been cast. Heatran, Dialga, one of you is leaving.
(Heatran and Dialga look at each other nervously)
Host: Here are the votes, D=Dialga and H=Heatran. D, D, H, D, D, H, D
Heatran: I GET TO STAY!
Host: Dialga, you are out, go to the teleporter and you will be put back in your natural habitat.
Week 2,
Regigigas: Why did the Torchic cross the playground? To get to the other slide! XD
Cresselia: STFU!
Darkri: For once, I agree with her.
Confessional, Darkri: It's been one bad joke after another with Regigigas!
Mailman: Mail call!
Shaymin: I got it!
Confessional, Shaymin: I'm trying to get along with everyone here so I can last.
Shaymin: Pikachu! You got a package!
Pikachu: Oh Boy! It's the diapers I ordered!
Confessional, Pikachu: This diaper is the solution to my bladder control problem, and it's comfy too!
Heatran: need coffee…
Giratina: have a green apple; it gives you more energy than a cup of coffee.
Confessional, Giratina: Heatran is REALLY hard to get along with, even Shaymin pisses him off!
(Later)
Host: Welcome to the temper challenge!
Heatran: WHAT THE (BLEEP!) DID YOU SAY?!
Host: This challenge is all about controlling your temper. Each contestant has to be as annoying as possible and the last one to attack wins. If you fall asleep, you are out.
Confessional, Heatran: WHO IS THE (MEGA BLEEP!) THAT COMES UP WITH THE (BLEEP)ING CHALLENGES?!
Confessional, Shaymin: I'm going to get myself out ASAP to be safe.
Host: Start being annoying!
(4 seconds later)
Heatran: WHAT DID YOU SAY YOU (BLEEP!?) (Uses Iron Head on Darkri)
Shaymin: Hi-Ya! (Uses Magical Leaf on Darkri)
Host: Heatran and Shaymin are out!
Darkri: Ouch…
Shaymin: Sorry!
(35 minutes later)
Manaphy: THAT'S IT! (Uses BubbleBeam on Regigigas)
Host: Manaphy is out!
Cresselia: (Farts) Sry!
Regigigas: Someone needs to quit eating the beans!
Palkia: I CAN'T TAKE REGIGAS'S JOKES ANYMORE! (Uses Spacial Rend on Regigigas)
Host: Palkia is out!
Regigigas: You caused me to get hit! (Uses Ice Punch on Cresselia)
Host: Regigigas is out!
Regigigas: Like a Chicago Cubs Player!
Darkri: Don't mock the Cubs! (Uses Dark Pulse on Regigigas)
Host: Darkri is out!
Darkri: It was worth it!
Confessional, Darkri: Regigigas needs to SHUT THE (BLEEP) UP!
Confessional, Shaymin: Regigigas seems to be the only one that the Pokèmon are hitting.
Host: We are down to the final 3 for this challenge!
Pikachu: zzzzzzzzzzz
Host: Pikachu is out!
Confessional, Pikachu: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Confessional, Giratina: It was down to me and Cresselia, and I know how to push her buttons.
Giratina: Hey Cresselia! Yo momma's so fat, she could sell shade!
Confessional, Cresselia: YMJHNEOM (Yo momma's jokes have no effect on me.)
Cresselia: YMSD,SHU!
Giratina: What?
Cresselia: Sigh, Yo momma's so dumb, she had you!
Giratina: TAKE THIS (BLEEP!) (Uses Shadow Force on Cresselia)
Host: Cresselia wins!
Cresselia: Ouch, and w00t!
(Later)
Pikachu: Who did you pick?
Cresselia: RAD (Regigigas and Darkri)
Host: Everyone but Regigigas and Darkri go to the confessionals and vote!
Confessional, Pikachu: Regigigas pisses everyone off!
Confessional, Shaymin: I think I may have angered Darkri so I vote for him, just in case.
Confessional, Heatran: GO TO (BLEEP!) REGIGIGAS!
Confessional, Manaphy: Regigigas has got to go!
Confessional, Giratina: I vote for Heatran
Confessional, Cresselia: GROR! (Get rid of Regigigas!)
Confessional, Palkia: Beat it, Regigigas!
Host: The votes have been cast. Regigigas, Darkri, one of you is leaving.
(Darkri looks calm, Regigigas looks…well it's hard to tell whet emotion he's feeling with his face.)
The votes have been tallied and there is 1 vote for, Heatran? 1 vote for, Darkri and 5 votes for Regigigas! You got to go dude!
Everyone but Regigigas: Good Riddance!
Host: You know the drill, you saw Dialga do it.
Everyone but Regigigas: JUST GO ALREADY!
Week 3,
Heatran: WHO TOOK MY STRESS BALL?!
Confessional, Shaymin: I can't get ANY sleep with Heatran yelling all the time.
Confessional, Pikachu: My head feels like it is being ripped open.
Confessional, Cresselia: HN2STFU! (Heatran needs to shut the (BLEEP!) up!)
Heatran: I NEED MY STRESS BALL!!!!!!!!
Palkia: (Munch, Munch) Does it look like a pretzel?
Heatran: NO YOU BLOCKHEAD!!!
Confessional, Palkia: I just LOVE pretzels! (Munch)
Confessional, Giratina: I vote for Heatran! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Host: Today's challenge is a classic! It's Simon Says!
Confessional, Manaphy: I don't know how THAT was put in!
Confessional, Giratina: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Host: If you can't do what I say you must say "I can't" unless I didn't say "Simon Says."
Confessional, Shaymin: At least it's fair.
Host: Simon Says clap!
Cresselia, Heatran, and Shaymin: I can't
Host: Giratina is out!
Giratina: zzzzzzzzz
Confessional, Pikachu: Giratina can't wake up. I wish the same happened to me instead of this headache.
Host: Stop clapping!
Heatran: I CAN'T!
Manaphy: (Stops clapping)
Host: Heatran and Manaphy are out!
Confessional, Heatran: (BLEEP!) SIMON SAYS!
Host: Simon Says stop clapping!
Cresselia and Shaymin: I can't!
Host: Simon Says give the host $20!
Everyone: I can't!
Host: Simon Says screw you!
Everyone: I can't!
Host: Simon Dance!
Darkri, Shaymin, Cresselia, and Pikachu: (Start dancing)
Host: I didn't say Says!
Darkri, Shaymin, Cresselia, and Pikachu: Oops!
Host: Palkia wins!
Palkia: (Munch, Munch) What did you say? I was eating a Pretzel.
Pikachu: You won, Palkia!
Palkia: Aw Yeah!
(Later)
Shaymin: Who's in the hot seat this time?
Palkia: Heatran and Cresselia.
Cresselia: WM?! (Why me?!)
Palkia: Your l33t is bugging me.
Host: You guys know the drill.
Confessional, Giratina: zzzzHeatranzzzzz
Confessional, Palkia: Heatran has got to go.
Confessional, Shaymin: Heatran's mean!
Confessional, Pikachu: Heatran hurt my ears.
Confessional, Manaphy: Heatran should go back to the volcano!
Confessional, Darkri: Heatran. Final Answer.
Host: OK, This vote off was a landslide. Heatran is out.
Heatran: WHAT?! YOU (MEGA BLEEP!) I'LL KILL YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE?!
Machamp: Into the teleporter you go!
Host: Thank you Machamp!
Weak 4,
Manaphy: LOOK OUT! COMEING THOUGH!
Cresselia: WTF?
Manaphy: (Rushes into the girl's bathroom and pukes)
Shaymin: You OK, Manaphy?
Manaphy: NO! I'm vomiting like crazy! (Pukes)
Darkri: Is today your 14th birthday?
Manaphy: Yes, why do you (pukes) want to know?
Darkri: Congratulations!
Manaphy: Why?
Darkri: You're about to lay your first egg!
Manaphy: WHAT?!
Darkri: Every 14 years in a Manaphy's life, he/she lays a Manaphy egg!
Manaphy: I would say (pukes) hooray but I can't stop pukeing! (Pukes)
Host: Due to the fact that Manaphy's laying her first egg, she is excused from this week's challenge and she won't be able to be voted off.
Confessional, Shaymin: Manaphy's going to have a baby! That's sooooooo cute!
Confessional, Manaphy: (Pukes) My first egg! I wonder if I will make a boy or excuse me! (Pukes)
Host: Dr. Blissey, please come to the girl's bathroom. Manaphy's having her first egg.
Dr. Blissey: Hi Manaphy, I'm here to make sure you lay your first egg without any problems.
Confessional, Dr. Blissey: It's always thrilling to see a Pokèmon lay their first egg! It also involves a lot of vomit so I brought an IV and 25 buckets.
Confessional, Darkri: This is going to be blogged more than M-no.
Shaymin: Do you think Manaphy will be OK?
Host: Don't worry! Dr. Blissey graduated 4th in medical school, and her class had 378482 other students! Now this week's challenge will be fun! It's Hide 'n Seek!
Confessional, Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) At first, I thought Palkia and I didn't stand a chance.
Host: Due to their size, Palkia and Giratina will be temporarily shrunk.
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) I'm worried about possible side effects.
Confessional, Shaymin: (Laughing her (BLEEP!) off.) They sound hilarious!
Confessional, Cresselia: LMAO!
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) Does this have any side effects?
Pikachu: (Laughs his (BLEEP!) off)
Host: The only side effect of the shrink ray is the voice.
Cresselia: LMAO!
Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) Shut up before I shrink you!
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) Cresselia's l33t talk is (BLEEP!)ING ANYOING!
Confessional, Darkri: The l33t is getting on my nerves.
Confessional, Manaphy: (Pukes.) I don't like the (Pukes) l33t.
Host: You have 5 minutes to hide.
Confessional, Darkri: I'm a master of disguise.
(5 minutes later)
Swinub: Ready or not, here I come!
Confessional, Pikachu: A Swinub is seeking us?!
Swinub: (Sniff, Sniff.) I smell 3 Pokèmon in here.
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) I figured that a Swinub would be the seeker, so I took a bath after I was shrunk.
Swinub: Found you!
Shaymin: Dang it!
Confessional, Shaymin: Hiding in a flower pot seemed like a good idea.
Swinub: I smell a ghost type under the couch. I found you!
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) Can I please go back to normal size now?
Host: Sorry, the only way to reverse the shrink is to wait until midnight.
Confessional, Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) NOW HE TELLS ME!
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) This might be Karma for the time I called that Pichu a shrimp.
Swinub: Found Palkia!
Palkia: (BLEEP!)
Swinub: Something's in the cupboard, and it's not dishes
Confessional, Darkri: Who hides in a cupboard?
Swinub: Found you, Pikachu!
Pikachu: Congratulations, now get me outta here.
Confessional, Pikachu: That's one thing I'll never do again.
Swinub: Found Cresselia!
Cresselia: NUDN! (No you did not!)
Swinub: I was going for Darkri with that but I find Cresselia instead!
Confessional, Darkri: Now THAT'S a crafty Swinub.
Host: Darkri you can come out now, you won!
Darkri: I was under the bed.
Confessional, Swinub: I would never have looked there!
(Later)
Pikachu: Who's in trouble now?
Darkri: Giratina and Cresselia
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) Why me?
Darkri: I felt like it.
Host: Fourth verse, same as the first.
Confessional, Pikachu: Giratina makes me a little nervous, I vote him.
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) I'm anti-l33t, get Cresselia out of here!
Confessional, Shaymin: Giratina scares me!
Confessional, Darkri: Cresselia is going.
Host: We have a problem, the votes have tied. Hey Dr. Blissey, can Manaphy vote right now?
Dr. Blissey: (Yelling from the girl's bathroom.) She heard who was being voted off and she picks Cresselia!
Host: You heard the doctor, Cresselia, you're out.
Week 5,
Manaphy: This egg is a full time job.
Giratina: Did it just move?!
Palkia: I think it did!
Shaymin: Let me see! Let me see!
Darkri: Is it hatching?
Pikachu: Here it comes!
Baby: Huh? Where is mommy?
Manaphy: Over here.
Baby: Mommy!
Shaymin: He's sooooo cute!
Host: OK Pokèmon, it's time for your challenge, and don't worry about the baby, this one is safe for him!
Confessional, Manaphy: Isn't he cute?
Same confessional, Baby: What's that?
Still the same confessional, Manaphy: The camera.
Baby: (Crying)
Manaphy: What's wrong?
Baby: Big monsters!
Palkia and Giratina: We're friendly; you don't need to fear us.
Confessional, Manaphy: I think Giratina and Palkia are going to make it hard on my son, but I know they don't mean it.
Confessional, Darkri: I sure hope I don't scare the little guy.
Host: Welcome to the scavenger hunt challenge!
Confessional, Pikachu: At least we're doing something that's grade school instead of kindergarten for once.
Host: The stuff on the list will be found in the house, and no list has the same items.
Confessional, Shaymin: I'm not very good with finding stuff that I don't know the smell or sound of.
Host: Ready, set, search!
Baby: Is this on the list? (Holds up a white, hand-woven blanket with fringe)
Manaphy: It is!
Host: Don't worry, baby, you can keep the blanket. It's a gift from Pikachu.
Baby: Yay!
Confessional, Pikachu: I thought my blankey from when I was a Pichu would be a nice gift.
Confessional, Baby: I love Blankey! (He hugs Blankey.)
Confessional, Shaymin: That was soooo nice of Pikachu to give his Blankey to Manaphy's baby!
(2 hours later)
Host: Pikachu and Manaphy are down to one item each!
Confessional, Pikachu: I actually found my last item, but I thought Manaphy should win this one.
Manaphy: Found my last item!
Host: Manaphy wins!
(Later)
Darkri: Who did you pick?
Manaphy: Who do you think?
Baby: The big scary ones!
Host: Do I have to say it?
Shaymin: We know!
Confessional, Manaphy: Palkia has a chance of not scaring Baby, but not Giratina.
Confessional, Darkri: Sorry Giratina, but you have to go; you're scaring the baby more.
Confessional, Pikachu: Palkia's more likely to snap.
Confessional, Shaymin: Giratina scares me! Palkia doesn't do that.
Host: Normally I would build suspense but I don't feel like it today. Giratina, you're out.
Giratina: Well, it was fun.
Palkia: I hope we can be friends, baby.
Baby: Maybe biggie isn't so scary
Week 6,
(2:32 AM)
Baby: MOMMY!
Manaphy: What is it?!
Baby: Where's the ghost?
Manaphy: You must have had a bad dream.
Confessional, Manaphy: I wonder if Darkri had something to do with baby's nightmare.
Confessional, Pikachu: (Yawn.) We all took anti-nightmare pills before coming but Baby hasn't.
Confessional, Darkri: For once, I wish I didn't have this ability.
(6:21 AM)
Dr. Blissey: Take the pill, baby.
Baby: No!
Palkia: Come on, I took it.
Baby: OK.
Confessional, Shaymin: Palkia and Baby get along really well nowadays, it makes me jealous.
Confessional, Pikachu: It's a good thing Heatran's gone, or that baby would be crying all the time!
Confessional, Palkia: With Dialga gone there is a very low chance of Baby becoming a pervert.
Confessional, Baby: Mommy! Where are you?
Confessional, Pikachu: he reminds me of my little brother, but less fussy and hungrier.
Baby: I'm hungry!
Manaphy: Let me get your-Where's Baby's bottle?!
Confessional, Manaphy: Oh man! Oh man! Oh man! Where's did I put that bottle?!
Host: Why don't we make this a challenge? First one to find Baby's bottle wins.
Confessional, Baby: Everyone was searching for my bottle!
Confessional, Darkri: I wasn't searching so I could win; I was searching to make Baby happy.
Shaymin: Is this it?
Manaphy: It is!
Baby: My bottle! Thanks Shaymin!
Shaymin: You're Welcome.
(Later)
Manaphy: Who's it going to be this time?
Shaymin: Darkri and Pikachu, sorry guys.
Host: You guys know what to do.
Confessional, Manaphy: Darkri is the king of nightmares…
Confessional, Shaymin: Darkri can look scary if he yells…
Confessional, Palkia: Darkri should go, it's best for the baby.
Host: Pikachu.
Pikachu: Gulp.
Host: You are safe. Darkri, teleporter of tough love awaits you.
Darkri: I won't forget you!
Baby: Bye-Bye!
Week 7,
Palkia: (Sneezes)
Pikachu: Arceus bless you!
Palkia: Thanks, I think I have a cold.
Baby: I don't want your germs!
Confessional, Shaymin: (Sniff.) I think Palkia's cold is contagious. (Sneezes)
Dr. Blissey: Sorry Palkia and Shaymin, but you both have colds.
Palkia and Shaymin: Aw man!
Confessional, Pikachu: I've had 173 colds, so my chances of getting sick are only 17 out of 200.
Confessional, Manaphy: IF THOSE TWO GIVE MY BABY A COLD THEY'RE GOING TO WISH THEY WERE NEVER BORN!
Host: Think you have the guts to take on your worst fear? Because that's this week's challenge!
Confessional, Pikachu: Perfect timing! Hello? Couldn't this scar the Baby for life?
Host: Manaphy, you're up first, we'll take care of the baby while you're in the fear room.
Manaphy: Stay with Pikachu, OK?
Baby: Okey-Dokey!
(142 minutes later)
Manaphy: I CAN'T TAKE THE SPIDERS ANYMORE! LET ME OUT!
Confessional, Manaphy: Worst 142 minutes of my life!
Host: Manaphy has the lead, setting the bar WAY up there at 142 minutes.
Confessional, Baby: My mommy's brave!
Host: Palkia, you're up.
(23 minutes later)
Palkia: NO MORE! NO MORE!
Confessional, Palkia: No more zombies, mommy. No more zombies, mommy. No more zombies, mommy.
Host: Shaymin, you're up.
Shaymin: Pass.
Pikachu: Same here.
Host: Manaphy wins! So who do you want removed?
Manaphy: Don't you have a vote off?
Host: With only 4 players a vote off wouldn't work.
Manaphy: I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 20…
Palkia: 5
Pikachu: 10
Shaymin: 8
Manaphy: It was 14. Palkia, I'm sorry but you have to go.
Palkia: It's OK; I made a lot of friends here. See you later.
Baby: Bye Palkia!
Host: The final 3 are confirmed, it's Pikachu, Shaymin, and Manaphy with her baby! The one that get voted off tomorrow (by the contestants that already have been voted off) will receive $1,000 for reaching the final 3!
Confessional, Manaphy: $1,000!? That will go a long way to baby's education!
Confessional, Pikachu: My family is the reason I'm in this, we're poor and even the $1,000 cash prize will help!
Confessional, Shaymin: $1,000?! This will jump-start my plan to save the rainforests!
Weak 8,
Host: It is time to make your plea-videos to your former competitors!
Pikachu: I may not be potty trained, or powerful, or even a legend, but I have one thing that you should think about before you vote, I have a family,(holds up a photo of with him and his family) a mom, a dad, a little brother, and a little sister, and we are poor.
Manaphy and Baby: For those of you that were voted off early, this is Baby. Hi Pokèmon I never met before! Just think of me and him before you vote. Bye Pokèmon I never met before!
Shaymin: Now, I'm here to make sure you don't vote me off. (Goes off explaining Global Warming and why Rainforests will stop it) so with the money I win from this game, I will be able to launch the mother of all save the rainforest missions!
Dialga: Hmm, Shaymin does make a point, but Pikachu's family is in really bad shape….I vote Shaymin.
Regigigas: That baby's cuter than 1,000 Pichus! And Global Warming must stop! I vote Pikachu!
Heatran: (BLEEP!) THE RAINFOREST, PICKACHU'S FAMALY, AND MANAPHY'S BABY! I VOTE MANAPHY!
Cresselia: ITSSG. (I think Shaymin should go.)
Giratina: I have a soft spot for kids so I vote Shaymin.
Darkri: It's my fault Baby had those nightmares, I vote Pikachu.
Palkia: I miss Baby, I vote for Pikachu.
Host: Heatran, you are the tiebreaker, who will leave? Pikachu or Shaymin?
Heatran: SHAYMIN!
Host: The votes have been counted, Manaphy, you are safe.
Manaphy and Baby: All Right!
Host: Shaymin…
Shaymin: Yes?
Host: I'm sorry but you only win $1,000.
Shaymin: That's OK; I hope you two do your best!
Manaphy and Pikachu: We will!
Baby: Bye Shaymin!
Shaymin: Bye baby, I'll miss you the most!
Host: Who will win the $1,000,000,000 1st prize and who will win the $1,000,000 2nd prize?
Confessional, Manaphy: I made it this far, there's no backing down now!
Confessional, Pikachu: It's down to me and Manaphy, She's got a baby, but I got a family.
Final week,
Manaphy: What are they doing here?!
Host: time to pick your teams for the final challenge!
Confessional, Pikachu: (BLEEP!) Heatran and Dialga are back!
Host: Heatran, no cussing, there is a BABY here.
Baby: Mommy? Why is that big blue thing looking at me like that?
Manaphy: (Uses BubbleBeam on Dialga) DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT, DIALGA!
Host: Manaphy, call the toss
Manaphy: Tails.
Host: It is tails, you choose first.
Manaphy: Palkia
Confessional, Manaphy: Baby looks up to him so I figure it would be best.
Pikachu: Regigigas.
Confessional, Pikachu: He may make bad jokes every 8 seconds, but I can tell he's got talent.
Manaphy: Shaymin.
Pikachu: Cresselia.
Confessional, Pikachu: She's annoying with her l33t, but she's smart.
Manaphy: Darkri.
Confessional, Manaphy: Darkri and Cresselia hate each other and Baby does like him.
Pikachu: Giratina.
Confessional, Pikachu: He's powerful.
Manaphy: Heatran
Confessional, Manaphy: I'd rather have the raging potty mouth around Baby than the gay pervert.
Pikachu: (Sigh.) I guess I get Dialga…
Host: The teams have been made!
Confessional, Baby: The red thing is too loud! But mommy won't let the big blue thing within 10 feet of me.
Confessional, Manaphy: If Dialga gets within 10 feet of Baby, I'LL POUND THE CRAP OUT OF HIM!
Confessional, Pikachu: Manaphy is REALLY protective with Baby; I don't think she'll let Dialga within 10 feet of him without sending him to the hospital.
Dialga: Come on! Can't I just get within 10 feet of him?
Manaphy: Do that, AND YOU'LL PAY!
Confessional, Heatran: I'm going to stay away from the baby; I don't want to die anytime soon.
Confessional, Regigigas: Manaphy is so protective about that baby; even I can't make a joke about it!
Host: The first challenge is volleyball! Manaphy, who do you choose for your partner?
Heatran: PICK ME! I GOT SKILLS!
Confessional, Heatran: I'm the only Pokèmon that is not allowed in the Pokèlipics volleyball; you can't do it anymore if you get 50 gold medals.
Manaphy: I pick Heatran.
Host: Now you pick, Pikachu.
Pikachu: I pick Dialga
Confessional, Pikachu: Best to get rid of the stupid pervert early.
Host: The rules are, you must use your move to hit the ball, you may use you moves to hinder your foes, and the first team to get 3 points wins. Pikachu, you serve first.
Pikachu: Iron Tail!
Referee: Out!
Manaphy: Heart Swap!
Heatran: STONE EDGE!!!!
Dialga: (in Pikachu's body) Roar of Time!!!!! What the heck?!
Referee: In!
Manaphy: 1 more and we win!
Heatran: LAVA PULME!!!!!
(Everyone but Heatran coughs and hacks.)
Referee: Manaphy and (hacks) Heatran win!
Host: Team Manaphy 1, Team Pikachu 0.
Confessional, Pikachu: I knew Dialga was not skilled, so I got rid of him early.
Confessional, Baby: The red thing and the big blue thing went bye-bye after the volleyball match.
Host: Our second challenge is The Math Off! Manaphy, choose your partner.
Manaphy: Darkri, you're up.
Confessional, Manaphy: Darkri is the smartest on our team.
Pikachu: I pick Cresselia.
Confessional, Pikachu: I think I made the right choice.
Host: First to get five questions right wins. First question, √144 – 3 * 4 =?
Manaphy: 28!
Host: No
Pikachu: 0!
Host: Yes! 1 point for Pikachu!
Manaphy: Challenge! 12 – 3 = 7! 7 * 4 = 28!
Host: You multiply before you subtract.
Confessional, Manaphy: I never got a good math education.
Confessional, Darkri: Why is it hard to remember PEMDAS or Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally?
Host: Question two, 8 over 5 * 40
Darkri and Cresselia: 64!
Host: Point for both teams!
(After the math off)
Team Pikachu wins, 5-2!
Confessional, Manaphy: Now I know why kids hate math.
Host: Both teams have won 1 challenge each, time for the 3-leg race!
Manaphy: I pick Palkia
Confessional, Manaphy: It's really hard to run with Shaymin
Pikachu: I pick Giratina
Confessional, Pikachu: He's faster.
Manaphy: Wait, how will he be able to run with those giants?
Host: GET THE SHRINK RAY!
Palkia and Giratina: Oh man! Not again!
Manaphy: Sorry I asked guys!
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) This isn't funny!
Confessional, Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) I hate being shrunk!
Confessional, Baby: Those 2 were funny after they got shrunk!
Host: Are you ready?
Manaphy: I am!
Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) Ready to run!
Baby: BWA HA-HA HA-HA!
Pikachu: Good to go!
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) I got ants in my pants about this!
Baby: BWA HA-HA HA-HA!!!!
Host: Get set!
Pikachu: Set in like a stain!
Manaphy: That was lame.
Host: GO!
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) I think flying would work better.
Pikachu: Unless you want me to puke, stay on the ground!
Confessional, Pikachu: I can't fly without a barf bag.
Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) They're catching up!
Manaphy: I can see that!
Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) I don't care about your stomach; I'm flying!
Pikachu: (Starts pukeing)
Manaphy and Palkia: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!
Confessional, Manaphy: That. Was. Disgusting.
Confessional, Palkia: (In a higher pitched voice.) I got Pika-Puke all over me!
Confessional, Baby: I thought everything pooped out their butts.
Confessional, Pikachu: My poor tummy.
Confessional, Giratina: (In a higher pitched voice.) In my defense, I thought Pikachu was bluffing.
Host: Pikachu and Giratina win! The score is now, Manaphy-1 Pikachu-2.
Confessional, Baby: Mommy was losing, how does the best person lose?
Host: This next challenge is 20Q's!
Confessional, Manaphy: This was why I kept Shaymin for last.
Confessional, Pikachu: Maybe I should have kept Giratina.
(Author's Note: I feel like skipping this)
It's tied with both teams at 2, and that means it's time for the tiebreaker…Are You Full of Crap?
Baby: What's crap?
Confessional, Manaphy: He just had to say that in front of Baby, didn't he?
Confessional, Pikachu: At least crap isn't a cuss word.
Host: You 2 will be hocked up to polygraphs and we'll ask you question that you may not want to answer truthfully, first one to lie 5 times, loses.
Baby: What's a polygraph?
Host: It tell us if someone's telling the truth, or a lie. 1st question, when were you potty trained?
Manaphy: 3 years old.
Pikachu: Never.
Host: have you ever broken the law?
Manaphy and Pikachu: No.
Host: Do you or did you ever have a crush on someone?
Manaphy and Pikachu: No!
Both polygraphs: LIE!
Host: That's strike one for both of you. What's your favorite TV show?
Manaphy and Pikachu: I don't have a favorite.
Host: Have you ever eaten poop?
Manaphy: No
Pikachu: Yes
Host: OK, that's gross.
Confessional, Pikachu: What? I was forced to eat it!
Host: Is there anything you hate?
Manaphy and Pikachu: Yes.
Host: Why did you come on this show?
Manaphy: Felt like it
Pikachu: For my family.
(3 hours later)
Host: Strike 4, Manaphy! Have you ever cussed when children where around?
Pikachu: Does the C-R word count?
Host: No
Pikachu and Manaphy: No
Host: What was your favorite moment that happened here?
Pikachu and Manaphy: When Baby hatched.
Host: Besides Baby, who was your best friend here?
Pikachu and Manaphy: uhhhhhh
Manaphy: Shaymin, I guess
Pikachu: I can't decide
Host: Have you ever had s-
Manaphy: THERE IS A BABY HERE!
Host: Right, I forgot about that.
Manaphy: I've never done the nasty.
Pikachu: What are you talking about?
Baby: I'm confused.
Host: Nevermind. Have you ever been in a fight?
Manaphy: Does Super Smash Bros Brawl count?
Host: No.
Pikachu: What about street fighter?
Host: I meant a REAL fight.
Pikachu and Manaphy: Nothing real.
Host: Did you know that Michal Jackson is dead?
Pikachu: Yes
Manaphy: WHAT??!!!!!!????
Confessional, Manaphy: WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
Baby: Who's Michal Jackson?
Confessional, Pikachu: Most people would be beat up if they asked that, but Baby is just a baby.
Michal Jackson's ghost: I Beat it! Beat it! Beat it! Beat it!
Everyone else: NOBODY ASKED YOU!
"Weird Al" Yankavich: Eat it!
Everyone else: Who's that guy?
Host: Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Manaphy: I think I was in the ocean.
Pikachu: I was watching TV when it turned to the Twin Towers, the 1st plane could have been an accident but the 2nd one was NO COINCIDENCE!
Host: This has gone on long enough. Have you ever been the victim of aperay
Manaphy: No.
Pikachu: Of coarse not!
Host: OK THAT'S IT! WE'RE DOING MARIO PARTY!
Confessional, Manaphy: Why didn't he put in the Mario Party sooner?
Confessional, Pikachu: This will be good; I'm a Mario Party master.
(4 duel mini-games later)
Host: For the final I'm picking…You're the Bob-omb!
Confessional, Pikachu: When it comes to luck, always pick the one on the right.
(23 seconds later)
Manaphy: Ok, we just tied, how does that happen?
Host: REDO!
(23 more seconds later)
Pikachu: We tied again…
Host: This isn't working out…
Confessional, Manaphy: Every game was a tie, we couldn't get the controls.
Confessional, Pikachu: I decided to do the only sensible thing.
Pikachu: I give up!
Host: Why?
Pikachu: So this can end.
Host: Good enough. You still get $1,000,000 for getting this far!
Pikachu: We're not poor anymore!
Host: Manaphy, you have won the grand prize of $1,000,000,000!
Manaphy: WOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOO!!!
Host: What will you do with all this cash?
Manaphy: I don't know, get a big house, send Baby to Collage, invest in green energy plans, and open a stray house for stray animals.
Host: All good ideas, and remember readers, leave a review so GiratinaB knows what he did right and what he did wrong.
Baby: And no being mean without a reason on the reviews!
