Ok so this is a kind of funny light story, set in one night somewhere in season 10. It's full of fluff. The story turned out a bit differently as I'd planed but who am I to complain. I hope you'll like it and please review if you can. I'd really appreciate the feedback. Enjoy!
Part 1 (Obsessing)
Samantha Carter had been standing in front of her closet for a long time now. She couldn't decide what to pack.
What am I supposed to pack for a sleepover on base?
I mean come on; sleeping bags and an indoor picnic in the gateroom! What kind of an idea is this?
The kind of idea that Hank Landry comes up with.
I could call in sick.
Nah, the general would see right through it. He knows how much we hate the idea and that's why he's loving it so much.
He won't rest till the whole SGC has had a nice team or base night, for that matter, together.
There is no out from this.
Which brings me back to the same problem: what should I pack?
If I take my normal sleepwear: air force tee and these sweat pants, the guys will make fun of how masculine and soldiery I am.
I mean I have had sleepovers with Daniel and Teal'c and Jack, ahem I mean the general. I mean Jack... What the hell am I doing apologizing to myself for calling him Jack in my mind, I mean I'm allowed to atleast be honest with myself, right?
Oh for crying out loud!
I can't believe myself I even get angry the same way he does. This is too much. I mean…
Oh forget it. Let's get back to the packing. Daniel will be here to pick me up soon.
So I always wore sweats when we had a team sleepover with my old team. But that was because I had worn them before I went to bed, while we were still hanging out.
If I wear the air force tee, they will never let me hear the end of it, especially Cam.
I could wear another tee with my sweat pants.
Oh god there's nothing in there but air force tees and this pink one, definitely not wearing it in front of the guys
This baby blue tank top… Yeah right like that's gonna happen.
I have two flannel pajamas: one pink, ok again never gonna happen, and a lime green one.
Nahh, too bright, will grab too much attention.
What the hell! I am gonna wear the air force tee. I mean….
But what if all the other female members wore feminine stuff, and I once again become one of the boys.
I'm sick of being one of the boys.
I'm sick of being the team girl, too.
Thank god for Vala.
Vala.
She'll definitely be wearing some over the top sexy outfit.
She'd wanna attract Daniel.
Hehe she's always nagging him making these jokes about their relationship. She doesn't care if it's inappropriate. She just blurts her feelings out right. She's sure of her self and she's not ashamed of her femininity. She loves being a woman. She's confident with letting her feelings show, too confident at that.
God, if I had been like that!
If I had just once let my guard down and showed him how I felt.
But I did. I let my guard down and I let him see me cry. I stood there in front of him and almost wept like a child.
I let him hold me in his arms and comfort me like a stupid child.
I'm never letting my guard down again.
I'm a soldier, a warrior as Teal'c so elegantly puts it. I don't cry in front of anyone .
I will never cry in front of anyone again.
God, I still regret that day.
But I had to let it out. I had to let him know I couldn't have survived loosing him.
I mean, I'm human after all.
My best friend had died for heaven's sake and the man I love just barely made it.
The man I love.
When did I start allowing myself to use that word.
I mean there's definitely something between us, something more than with Daniel and Teal'c but…
But what? We both know it.
We've always known it.
I love him.
And I don't know but he at least cares about me.
I love him.
But still I'm never letting my guard down again.
I'm not a teenager who gets butterflies every time she sees the guy she has a crush on.
I'm an air force colonel for crying out loud!
Oh …..
I'm gonna have to stop using this expression!
Ummm, I have to continue packing.
I can't allow myself to always drift off path by the thoughts in my head. I gotta give it a rest.
So sweat pants, definitely sweat pants.
Ummm and maybe these cute navy blue hot shorts just in case.
I'm not gonna wear them, not a chance, but still!
Maybe if Vala and I hang out in her quarters later.
And the air….
No the pink…
No no the air force tee
And maybe the turquoise tank top?
I mean Jack always said that baby blue complimented my eyes.
What's he got to do with it any way.
He's in Washington. He's got nothing to do with this.
I'll take the turquoise tank top to match the shorts if I use them.
There you go the sleepwear is in the bag.
Now I'll take those turquoise slippers to keep my feet warm.
No these are to girly.
Maybe I can just take those white furry socks, they warm more and are more respectable.
But that doesn't match without the tee it's too dressy for the worn out tee.
Maybe… Yes that's it.
I'll take this white sleeveless top with the smiley face.
Yep that's it then.
Ahhh and this coconut body splash, it's the smell that always causes Jack to look at me differently.
He always sits closer to me when I wear.
He never let on, but I know he loves it.
Oh god!
What is wrong with me today?
All this obsessing over what to wear and what who will think… and about Jack!
Why is he even on my mind?
I haven't heard from him in almost a month.
Get a hold of yourself Samantha Carter!
You were never one to be so obsessive.
Well I am but not over these things, over the fate of the galaxy and eminent doom kind of things.
Yes, you are a scientist not a love struck girl fantasizing about her off limits love.
Grow up!
Maybe I'm spending too much time with Vala, all her girlishness is starting to rub off!
God I hate this.
I gotta stop my head!
I gotta stop talking to myself all the time.
People will think I'm crazy!
Heck, even I think I'm crazy!
Stop just stop ok!
'Honk Honk'
That's Daniel!
Thank god!
"Coming!"
