Yay! Welcome to a new fic! I had another Layton crackfic but it kinda died, so... randomness in the professor's classroom, yay!

Plus, I own nothing. First and last time I'm saying it.


"So, if everyone would please turn to page 143 in their textbooks..." the Professor began. He paused. "Luke, stop swinging on your chair. You'll fall."

"But these seats are so... SWINGABLE!" Luke cried, laughing as he fell.

"IT'S FIZZY, IT'S GINGER, IT'S SWINGABLE!" Emmy joined in.

"My chairs are not Irn Bru," Layton said, irked. "We are in London, not Scotland. And someone please escort Luke to the nurse's office."

Bill Hawks stood up.

"Someone who isn't a manipulative bastard please."

Bill Hawks sat down. Flora took his place and dragged Luke out of the room.

"Roll call! Emmy Altava!"

"Present and correct!"

"Randall Ascot!"

"Here!"

"Oh, never mind alphabetical order," the professor muttered. "Flora Reinhold!"

"Here, hehehe!"

"Jean Descole!"

"I'm not here."

"Clive Dove!"

"Here!"

"And Don Paul?"

"MY NAME IS NOT PAUL!"

"Yes, I temporarily forgot. Moving on."

Nobody bothered to call for Bill Hawks because everyone hated him.

"So, if you would please turn to page 143..."

The classroom was silent apart from the flipping of pages.

"Why are we looking at rocks?" asked Randall.

"Professaaaah someone drew boobs on my textbook..." Luke whined, having teleported back to his desk with Flora in tow.

"Ignore the graffiti Luke." The Professor sighed. This was going to be a lot more than he bargained for...

"Professor, what's a 'metamorphic'?" asked Flora.

"Ooh, I know!" Clive cried. "It's a metaphor about metal!"

"No Clive."

"Professor, I can't read."

"Professor, I'm allergic to salad."

"Professaaaaah, I feel unloved." Luke announced, in the midst of the random comments.

"Don't feel unloved my boy," said Layton, giving Luke a quick hug.

"Luke is a shota!" yelled Randall. Layton's eyes blazed.

"Oh no you did not." Luke said, his voice growing dangerously soft.

"Shota, shota, shota!" Randall persisted. Luke probably would have ended up killing him if Emmy hadn't given him a good roundhouse kick.

"Everyone is mad," Descole said, slumping over the desk.

"Profess-"

"Be quiet!" the Professor said loudly. Strangely enough everyone put their heads down and began to work.

Ten minutes later, Flora put her hand up.

"I'm finished Professor!"

Layton smiled and went over to see her work.

She had drawn the apple logo. Emmy snickered next to her.

"Flora, what...?" The Professor looked confused.

"You never said we had to answer the questions!" Flora looked very pleased.

"Normally, one does not have to be told to do such things when it is plainly obvious!"

"Professaaaaaah, Don Paolo is copying my work!" Luke yelled.

"I never!" Don Paolo lied.

"LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE!" Luke yelled once more, promptly setting fire to Don Paolo's pants.

The fire alarm went off and the sprinklers activated, drenching everyone.

"My feather boa!" Descole complained, shivering.

Bill Hawks said simply, "Mmn."

The bell rang.

"All right, this period's over. What do you have next?" enquired the Professor.

"History with Professor Sherbert... I mean Schrader," Randall licked his lips at the thought of sweets.

"Please refrain from killing me or any other teachers," the Professor said. "I'm talking to you, BILL HAWKS."

Everyone glared at Bill Hawks.

"This is bullying!" he whined.


There will probably be another chapter today. It's the first chapter so it was a bit short, but oh well.