Pairings: Shikamaru &Ino
notes: dudes. I don't know what's up with my muse lately, making my inspiration go into overdrive. This was supposed to be a oneshot but I think I'll make it last a little longer.
musica: knockout by lil wayne feat. Nicki minaj
Summary: Shikamaru accidentally sets a 2,010 year old genie free and he has three wishes. The problem is that he doesn't particularly want them. But the genie, Ino, can't leave until she has granted his wishes.
italics = flashback
disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Coke-a-cola.

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o1:

just knock me out

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It'd been three days since Shikamaru had opened that vintage coke bottle and now he wished he hadn't.

With a puff of smoke and a gurgling noise (because these things had to have some sort dramatic prelude) a girl had come out of it. A blonde haired blue eyed girl with nice knockers (it was hard not to notice since she wore only a violet bra-like top and some matching short shorts) and a huge frown on her face. He'd stared at her for a few seconds before lying back down in his place on the roof of his house and continued to gaze at the clouds. This irritated the blonde even more.

"Why the hell did you wake me up?!" she asked, her voice high pitched and it annoyed him.

"I didn't mean to. It was an accident," He replied, thinking that one of the clouds looked like a pineapple.

"Oh." Out of the corner of his eye he saw her look confused.

"So you mean you didn't wake me up to give you your wishes?" the girl asked disbelievingly.

"No, I was up here staring at the clouds and I got thirsty."

"So you pick up an empty Coke bottle?" she asked incredulously.

"Oi! I didn't realize it was empty until I opened it, 'kay?" He yawned and stretched out farther on the roof.

The girl grew silent for a while then she stood up, the silver bracelets on her wrists clinking together at the sudden movement. She clapped her hands together to get his attention.

"Well snap, snap! C'mon what are your wishes?" she folded her arms imperiously causing the bracelets to clink together again.

"What are you going on about, woman?" his eyes were closed now and he sounded sleepy.

"I can't leave until you have gotten your three wishes," She explained.

"Look, um…"

"Ino"

"Yeah, Ino I would love to help you out but I don't know what to wish for."

"Seriously dude. I am a genie. You opened the bottle so you get three wishes. It's not that hard."

"I'm serious. I don't have anything that I really want at the moment."

"You've gotta be kidding me," she groaned. Her waist-length pale yellow locks swayed as she shook her head in agitation.

"Of all the masters in the world I had to have the misfortune of getting one who doesn't want anything," she sighed.

"Just suck it up Ino, eventually he'll want something so all you have to do is wait," she calmed herself.

After a moment, Shikamaru got up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Where are you going?" Ino asked him, tilting her head to the side curiously.

"In the house of course," He answered and began to descend the ladder on the side of the house. When he got to the ground Ino was there clutching her bottle for dear life.

"You ass! As my master you are supposed to keep up with my bottle not just leave it lying anywhere," she huffed.

Shikamaru turned to get a good look at her. Her pale yellow locks were tousled and her skin was pale from being in a bottle for so long. The top she wore left much of her skin exposed so he could see her nice flat stomach. She wore matching purple short shorts and he could see her long pale legs that seemed to go on forever. In short Ino was hot but she was also a girl which meant she was troublesome.

Ino began to blush from his scrutiny. "W-what?" she asked.

"You're so troublesome," He grumbled and walked into his house.

"Hey!" she ran in after him.

Shikamaru lived alone, having graduated from high school and now he went to University of Konaha as a full time student because he got so much money from scholarships. He didn't know what he wanted to be yet so he was just trying a bit of everything. He went to the refrigerator and pulled out the ingredients to make a sandwich. He glanced over at Ino who was having a look around his living room (his house had very limited space).

"You still here?" He asked, sounding annoyed even though he wasn't. He just wasn't used to female company for extended periods of time.

"Duh!" He could just hear her rolling her eyes.

"I'm not leaving till I grant those wishes, unfortunately," she continued and turned around to face him.

She put her hands on her hips and scrutinized him.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing, it's just that I've never had a master that didn't make good on collecting their wishes," she sounded thoughtful.

"You're one weird dude," she concluded yet again.

Shikamaru finished his sandwich and started down the hallway to his room. Ino immediately followed as well. Shikamaru's room was pretty generic. He didn't have pictures of his friends or family anywhere and the only things on his dresser were awards that he'd gotten over the last year that were put there simply because he was too lazy to move them. The color scheme was black, white, and brown. His sleigh bed was dark brown and his mattress was covered with black sheets and a comforter with white pillows. He had a nightstand that matched the bed as well as the dresser and his walls were starch white. Shikamaru watched as Ino took all this in. She shook her head and sat her bottle on his nightstand.

"Well Master, I bid you goodnight and hopefully by tomorrow you will have at least one wish ready for me," she sighed and smiled.

"Uh goodnight Ino," Shikamaru replied awkwardly. He still couldn't get over the fact that he now shared a living space with a genie. He watched in well hidden awe as she transformed into vapor and got in her Coke bottle. Things were definitely getting increasingly weird.

Ino was a troublesome girl who just wouldn't leave him alone. He knew that all he had to do was make up three bogus wishes and she'd be out of his hair but he couldn't bring himself to do it for two reasons. Number one: even though Shikamaru wouldn't admit he liked having the blonde around. They had become close in the three days that they knew each other even if he did find her troublesome. Number two: he'd have to be the biggest idiot in Konaha to waste three wishes just because he thought he was getting closer to a hot blonde. So Shikamaru would bear it until he thought of three wishes. What a drag.