Dear Kyouya…
By Any Unborn Child
(Disclaimer: Ouran is not mine. I think you all know that by now.)
Days of night slip through my mind
In a silent motionless sky
Paralyzed and motionless
All things falter
Ever since that night,
that fateful night,
the night following the beach incident…
Haruhi started to wonder about Kyouya.
What were his real intentions about her?
She thought she had him all figured out.
She thought he was all about himself.
What he would gain,
In what he sought after.
There was nothing for her to worry about.
If he was all about himself, then there was no cause for alarm.
Not that she'd want a real relationship anyway.
Now that she thought about it,
Now that what he said spun and spun around her head over and over,
She was really second-guessing herself.
Somewhere back
I lost myself
So far deep inside of you
Everything's become too much
So deep, so weak
Where did I go?
She thought long and hard about what Kyouya had been thinking.
What his thought process was.
She'd thought she was able to read people.
She'd thought that she had an idea of what people were capable of.
What Tamaki was capable of.
What the twins were capable of.
What Mori and Huni were capable of.
What Kyouya was capable of.
Because she knew that, the experience itself wasn't that jarring.
The aftereffects were another story.
Was he that set on trying to teach her something?
It had almost seemed like he was…
She didn't want to think about it.
Inwardly, she thought she knew Kyouya.
He was supposedly the smart, cool one of the group.
Nothing was ever really out of order.
Everything would be smooth sailing in Kyouya's analytical and capable hands.
But…
Would it have been so bad…
If Kyouya had gone through with it?
Would it have been so bad…
If she had let him?
Images of falling light
Move across the hollow sky
I see movement after all
Calling, falling
She couldn't imagine what would have happened.
She tried not to.
She wanted not to.
It was seemed so enticing.
So forbidden.
So out of flux.
What if,
For at least a moment,
At least one second,
The façade that Kyouya put up
had broken?
The veneer of his collected self
Would have been smashed to pieces,
Unable to put back together.
Haruhi would have never thought of him the same way again.
She would have never thought of herself in the same way again.
But was that the case now?
Remember you're not the only one
To feel this way, 'cause I'm one
Who has also had enough
She wasn't so sure anymore.
At incidental times, when she was alone with Kyouya,
Which wasn't too often,
She felt a little more vulnerable around him.
She knew she could trust him,
Or at least she tried to,
But there always seemed to be an air of uncertainty.
She never knew what to expect from Kyouya when she was with him.
She never knew what to expect from herself when she was with him.
They both had layers that no one else but the two of them had seen.
They held each other on a pedestal, in a way.
No telling what was going to happen in the future.
Inwardly, Haruhi wondered what she should expect.
With Kyouya, she didn't have a clue.
So long, dear John
I'm gonna go
Fin
(A/N: Set after episode 8. I really love that episode, and I really love Kyouya and Haruhi's scene. There are a lot of unexplored layers in that interaction, and layers that really affect how they act around each other in the long run. That scene also made Kyouya that more of an interesting character to me, and that is what I tried to express in this little fic of mine. Hope you enjoyed it!)
(A/N Part Two: The lyrics in the fic are from the song "Dear John" by Scott Matthew. The song is featured on the third soundtrack of the anime Ghost in the Shell. If you haven't already checked it out, I really recommend it.)
