Please review.
I do not own the characters of Big Wolf on Campus, but I do own Shane
Remember Enjoy
Warning Tommy's wolf is maturing and insane !
-
It was about a year, approximately a year and two months, before the Pleasantville State University's production of the Laramie Project that Merton J. Dingle expressed his attraction to males rather he "came out of the closet." He assembled Tomas "Tommy" Dawkins and Loriele "Lori" Baxter into the Lair and began his declaration, which was quite swift, but extended with stutters and twiddled thumbs.
Merton J. Dingle began hesitantly, "… I apologize for inconveniencing everyone…"
Tomas Dawkins instinctively sensed that there was something askew in Merton J. Dingle's life; he did not require the spirit of the wolf to recognize the problem, for it was in his best friend's monotonic, robotic auditorium speech. Before Merton J. Dingle continued Tomas Dawkins and Loriele Baxter harmoniously, anxiously, and rather agitatedly stated, "Merton just say what you have to say!"
Merton J. Dingle nervously smiled and nodded, "Well, I guess it all began on a humid summer day when I was fourteen… or fifteen years old, no… I was thirteen-"
"Merton" Loriele Baxter warned in a soft groan
"Right, right… Sorry guys. It's just that this has been on my mind for years… I bottled up everything these feelings everything for years. Drowning them out with fantasy, Gothicism, Lori, sirens, Hathor, Macha, Cerridwen, Don, Branwen, Bente—all right I'll stop," Merton ended his tangent on Celtic, Greek, and Japanese goddesses and Lori when his friends cocked impatient eyebrows at him, "but…" He sighed
Tomas Dawkins' inner wolf detected Merton J. Dingle's inner distress and instantaneously sympathy and compassion seeped into his eyes.
"I'm not living for anyone I'm living for myself. . . right?"
"Uh yes~ you are" Loriele Baxter stated as if she was stating 'duh.' "Merton what is this all about?" She stretched and roamed the Lair languidly grazing her hand across the numerous amounts of potions, concoctions, and serums placed on his shelves
A silence spawned in the Lair until Merton J. Dingle stated, "I'm attracted to men" he stated it slowly, uneasy, but with more confidence and a fixed composure he announced, "I'm gay." And inner and outer relief washed over him.
Tomas Dawkins peered at Merton J. Dingle with a mixture of emotions in his clouded hazel eyes, his tongue slid on his teeth searching for words. Tomas Dawkins had given into the stereotype that "all gay men were coming onto straight men," but he oddly wanted Merton to. . . he wasn't sure what he wanted Merton to do. . . He lowered his eyes and clamped onto his tongue assuming Merton was expressing his affection to him. It burned in his stomach to hope (or was it a homophobic assumption) that Merton was expressing his affection.
Loriele Baxter said the unimaginable filling laughter into the blankness, "So I am officially attracted to you now because you're unavailable." The night ended with opening stories, humor, and strengthened friendships.
-
But the University's production recreated Merton's "coming out story" in Tommy's mind, but accompanied with this memory were thoughts of Merton's strife at Pleasantville High School. Near the end Tommy replaced Merton J. Dingle with Matthew Wayne Shepard and this vision placed Tommy on edge.
Fortunately, the group flooded the backseats of the auditorium (grateful that their latest adventure didn't prevent them from seeing the University's production of the Laramie Project) because while pupils and faculty members applauded, Tommy gripped the arms of his chair carving his elongating nails into the wood. 'How can a person be so cruel? Why would someone ever want to hurt a person because they're gay!' sweat lingered in Tommy's thickening eyebrows. Unmerciful, unnecessary acts of violence flourished in Tommy's mind causing the wolf's want to surface to protect, 'will they hurt Merton?' Merton peered over at Tommy noticing he was not clapping, but Merton soon realized his best friend was distressed and tense. Merton leaned over and whispered, "Are you all right Tommy?"
Merton was greeted with fierce golden eyes, which answered his question. Merton streamed his fingers over Tommy's hand soothingly and began to chant a haiku by Robert Craig,
"black eyes chisel the stars –
for a moment
freedom"
A low, audible growl was the response to Merton's haiku.
"No not working? Shoot I've been saving that one for months now… I guess you're into scenic-"
"Mer—ton ple-a-se" Tommy snarled annoyed between clenched burgeoning teeth
"O' right …how about? Let's see… I know! How about this:
Among twenty snowy mountains,
The only moving thing
Was the eye of the blackbird"
(Wallace Stevens' Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird
The haiku did not help! Tommy envisioned Merton as the blackbird searching for help because a cruel, ruthless homophobe abandoned him to suffer.
Tommy's ears grew pointed and he began to tremble; he stumbled out of the auditorium viciously, jotting to a safe haven, the bathroom. He clenched onto the sink to stabilize himself from the agonizing transformation. He gazed deep into the mirror peering past himself and into the eyes of the werewolf.
"Calm down… calm… down... Merton's al…l right… He's fine" Tommy's lips were quivering underneath the wolf's need to surface. 'But he isn't all right. Is he all right?' All of the images of Tim and Travis shoving him into a closet, his locker, or in barren classrooms strangled Tommy's 'Merton's all right.' And visions of his old and new teammates calling Merton a: faggot, fairy, freaker, homo, weirdo, pixie, annihilated his 'calm down.'
Merton entered the bathroom astonished to see Tommy taller, hairier, growing a muzzle, and beyond wolfing-out. 'Holy dark forces! This never happened before' Merton immediately locked the door. Tommy gazed at Merton with burning golden eyes, for a moment Merton hesitated as if he didn't know Tommy.
"If any one hurts you I'll snap them" Tommy grunted, "like a twig! I'll kill them. If they hurt you!" Tommy gripped onto the edge of the sink as a pain ricocheted off the walls of his body and he yelled, almost roared.
Merton finally understood why Tommy was wolfing-out, originally he had thought Tommy found the girl on stage attractive and maybe was "relieving" himself, but this was different past masturbating.
"Tommy this isn't you, you're not a vicious killer besides big guy I'm fine…"
"No!" Tommy stated baring his teeth
Merton flinched; his shoulders tensed. Tommy sensed his fear, smelled his fear, and saw fear burgeoning into Merton's cobalt eyes. 'Shit. This isn't me. I'm scaring him. This isn't me' Tommy scrambled into the bathroom and sat on the toilet trying to shake the consistent, persistent rage. Merton followed Tommy into the bathroom stall, both analyzed one another's features until Merton broke the silence and the eye contact with his movements.
He grabbed tissue raveling it around his hands over and over again, "you could have gotten caught Tommy… You need to calm down… All right? I should be worrying about you. We don't want a mad scientist named... What's a good mad scientist's name... I don't know Margo finding you. Then he'll do God knows what… Probably, do some excruciating tests. Test after test only to extract some blood and make some type of serum or concoction… to you know make his minions werewolves. Vicious, maniacal werewolves… then he'll kill you and-" Tissue wasn't only in Merton's hand, but accumulating on the floor.
Tommy silenced Merton with a question, "You're afraid of me aren't you?"
Merton winced at that, then came over to his friend who was trembling slightly, "No… no"
"I smell it on you"
"You caught me...You're right… you smell fear on me." Merton lowered his head, he ripped the tissues that was trailing behind him and brought it to Tommy's brows and stroked gently, "I'm not afraid of you… I'm afraid I won't be able to help you anymore, you know calm you… Not even my clever folly and haikus could calm the wolf in you"
"No…I… Merton I just… The Laramie Project and people always hurt you… and! Kill them! I swear. I don't want to see you like that. If they ever-"
"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Calm down buddy… A logorrhea isn't going to help me understand why you wolfed-out like this. I'm guessing you didn't really look in the mirror"
Tommy sighed, relaxing, "The Laramie Project just made me really angry. I started thinking of all the people who have been bullying you. Then I thought about the white fence and blood and the haiku… You all alone hurt in the mountains"
'Note to self don't use that haiku again' Merton thought out loud
"I don't want to see you hurt ever…" Tommy snarled all over again, "You're my best friend and I wouldn't know what to do if-"
"Tommy..." Merton was oddly at a loss of words, he just continued to wipe Tommy's face until he 'de-wolfed, un-wolfed… De-wolfed…' It wasn't the time to think of words, Tommy's inner wolf was maturing and not much of a puppy anymore making it harder for Tommy to control Merton speculated.
"Are you better now?" Merton said softly
"Y—ye...yes" Tommy stated between erratic breaths.
"Good. Hugs?" Merton said playfully
Tommy chuckled, "Yea sure Merton I wouldn't mind a hug"
They hugged closely. A hug that resembled a connection between lost brothers.
Then Merton's hand patted Tommy's back rapidly ruining the sentimental moment, which could have developed, with his quarks, "Aww wolfy really cares for me"
Tommy let go and smiled, "Wolfy? Wolfy? That sounds too cute and cuddly... I prefer big guy over wolfy. Shane is really doing a number on you. Soon you'll have bleach blonde hair and be wearing pink or somethin'"
"Heh heh. Pink is the new black" Merton falsely laughed, but his acting was too good to be detected by Tommy's sensitive ears, "Shane's doing much more"
-
After Tommy and Merton's brotherly hug they returned to the theatre; Tommy's arm was thrown illustriously around Merton's shoulder. Lori became whelmed that Tommy calmed and she was grateful of Merton's decision to attend Pleasantville State University.
But her appreciation and exuberance vanished in the appearance of curiosity, "What the hell happened to you Tommy?" Her general low voice was raised an octave higher
Tommy removed his arm from Merton's shoulder and streamed his fingers in his lengthening hair, "Well. . ."
Merton's hands were in motion and Tommy and Lori knew that Merton was on a digression, "The inner wolf a natural predator of the night also has a gentler side, a side that we rarely see."
Tommy lightly plucked Merton's ear in defense
"It is a side that is a companion, a leader." Merton approached his best friends from behind and wrapped thin arms around their shoulders, "A Protector."
"But there was no danger present." Lori positioned her statement as a question
"The inner wolf mistook-"
Tommy reproached the question in layman's terms, "Some of my ideas just went crazy. I thought of all of Merton's bullies and I compared Merton to Matthew Shepard and that idea had the wolf more than freaked out so"
Lori nodded, her intuitiveness settled in, "I see"
Tommy clasped his hands together, "So let's grab some lunch. Your bus arrives in three hours, right?" He rubbed them together and peered at Merton and Lori, "I can go for some chicken… Even some bacon too"
"Yes my bus arrives at…" Lori observed her silver colored watch, "Six. We have a little more than three hours"
"Let's go to the Student Center. You can meet Shane! He should be at the Center because he goes to these meetings and stuff"
Constructive Criticism Adored
