Titanic Gundam

Okay, Mix a bored girl, a computer, old gundam tapes and the movie Titanic?

Titanic Gundam

Me: In shadows Hehe (evil laughing) They're here.

The Gundam co. all come to the stage from all different directions.

All ask at once: Er, hi guys!

Silence as they look at each other, then

All together: What are you doing here?

Silence again

Duo: You guys didn't happen to get an anonymous e-mail… did you?

Collective nods

Relena: It said to meet here… but who or what are we supposed to meet?

Me: from shadows Funny you should ask that, Relena…

All of the gundam pilots whip out guns. Duo screams and jumps into Hilde's arms

Hilde: (sarcastically) The god of death, ladies and gentlemen!

Duo: Oh yeah, right, I forgot…

sweatdrops

Quatre: ANYWAY… we need to focus on the task at hand.

Duo: Right! Come out! Whoever you are! But if you're a murderer give me five minutes to run away, ok?

Me: Whatever. Well, I'm sure you're all wondering why you're here, am I right?

Collective nods

Me: You're all here… come's out of shadows to be part of my play!

Collective facefaults

Heero:getting up Now, wait a minute. Who said we would ever be in this play of yours?

Me: I did, of course.

Heero: We don't have to. focuses gun on Me

Me: (laughs sinisterly. Opens one eye and sees that he is serious) Oh, puh-lease. Haven't you learned your lessons by now from the all the other fics you guys have been in? turns gun into a vacuum cleaner

Heero: looks from vacuum cleaner, to author, to vacuum cleaner, to author Okay, I get your point.

Me: Good. Now, let's start by passing out scripts and giving out parts.

Quatre: Wait, what play are we doing exactly?

Me: Titanic!

Noin: Whoa, whoa, whoa. There is no way you are getting me to go on some stupid boat and then have it sink only to die!

Me: Who said you were going to die? torturemaybe… But No! I won't actually KILL you… looks around room. Sees everyone's disbelieving looks. Smiles sweetly

Treize: I don't know. I don't like that look she's giving us. I say we all leave now.

Me: (scoffs) Go ahead and try.

Wufei: I'll go. Seeing how weak the rest of you are. (no one tries to stop him)

Wufei starts walking back the way he came. A loud ZAP is heard and he falls to the ground, charred

Me: Crispy Critters!

collective facefaults

Me: sees everyone on ground, takes out pepper spray Any more objections?

All together: No.

Me: GOOD! Now take your scripts and find your part on the sheet.

Collective gathering by sheet

Rose- Relena

Jack- Heero

Cal- Trieze

Ruth (Rose's Mom)- Dorothy

Ebritzio (Jack's friend)- Duo

Molly Brown- Sally

Captain- Lady Une

Mr. Murcock- Noin

Slave driver- Hilde

Mr. Andrews (architect)- Trowa

Mr. Ismay- Wufei

Tommy Ryan- Quatre

Mr. Lovejoy (Cal's spy person)- Milliardo

Er, and Catherine, you can help out back stage.

Catherine: Okay.

Heero +Relena: sweatdrop

Wufei: WHAT?!!! That small of a part! I deserve much better than that.

Quatre: I don't really know who that is, but oh well.

Trieze: I like Roses.

Hilde: SLAVE DRIVER?!

Duo: Well, you kinda fit the part…

Duo is stopped short by an oversized hairdryer courtesy of Spaceballs: The movie

Trowa: …

Me: Well, I hope that you are all HAPPY (looks around the room and glares) with your parts. We start tomorrow.