Hi... I'm so sorry... But the fandom needs it, and I promised my friend...

Disclaimer: I don't own HP

Summary: Umbridge fucks up

Please... Let me leave *runs screaming*

Umbridge stared politely at the half-giant before her. She made a mental note to make sure that the great oaf does not continue teaching at Hogwarts. "Are you Rubeus Hagrid?" Hagrid nodded, pressing a giant steak to his eye. "May I ask why you were absent?"

"I... Uh... Needed some fresh air, so I went to thee mountains."

"Why the mountains?"

"Some relatives are there, and the view is nice."

Umbridge nodded and whispered to herself. "Ah, yes. I'm sure filthy half breeds like him would want to see their disgusting families."

She looked up to fake a smile at Hagrid but saw that his face was twisted with rage. He grabbed her by her sweater and lifted her. "DID YOU JUST CALL MY FAMILY FILTHY!?" He roared in her face. Umbridge squeaked, but regained herself rather quickly. "Anyone stupid enough to cross breeds is filthy!" She spat like the dumb bitch she is.

Hagrid's anger got the better of him and he ripped off all of Umbitch's limbs. He then took off her clothes(A/n: this was hard to write, I swear to god I'm never doing this again) and slammed her onto his massive cock, tearing and ripping her insides completely. They stayed like that for half an hour, Hagrid thrusting his hips violently until he was sure the lady wasn't moving. He dropped her onto the floor and let Fang eat her remains. "Well, that's settled." He said cleaning up the mess with a flick of his umbrella and making himself some tea.

Fin.

Ugh. Ugh. I'm so disgusted, even more so thinking that I wrote this. For everyone who respects me as a writer, I'm sorry. I did this for my friend, who said she'd post one if I did. I can't look at this anymore, omfg. Please don't read this ever again if you already did. Again, I'm sorry, and I'm disgusted. I'm gonna go bathe my eyes in bleach.