Hurry Up and Die, Ron Weasley!
(Part 2 of the Hurry Up and Die! series, which can each be read as standalones.)
Tem more helpful tips for the potential angsty, depressing suicide fic writer in all of us!

Tip 1: DON'T make him a tragic hero.
Why? That's Harry's job, and Ron is a second fiddle (whether he likes it or not.)
Instead, DO make him just plain tragic.

Tip 2: DON'T set him up with Draco.
Why? Ron hates Draco more than anyone else... and not with a passion, either.
Instead, DO set him up with...nobody. He really doesn't mesh well with most personalities.

Tip 3: DON'T ruin the story with uncomfortable and off-topic reminiscing.
Why? It makes things really weird when you go back over his fear of spiders instead of something relevant.
Instead, DO be clear and precise, like the character himself.

Tip 4: DON'T make him kill himself over a cheater.
Why? He has major denial issues, so would not believe his partner was cheating on him, even if she were.
Instead, DO play with those denial issues, as they can be quite fun.

Tip 5: DON'T write him committing the Weasleycest.
Why? There are so many others of them that would be better candidates for that sort of thing.
Instead, DO write a good twincest or something. (Yum, symmetry.)

Tip 6: DON'T use that cheesy "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!1!!!!1!!1!!one!!!1!!"
Why? CHEESY (as previously mentioned).
Instead, DO have whoever was bellowing be shocked speechless, meaning less dialogue and, by that token, less punctuation.

Tip 7: DON'T set it before Voldemort's defeat (if the story is a oneshot) (especially if it's a double suicide of the RHr couple).
Why? Because then Harry doesn't have backup, and they wouldn't do that to him (unless it's a plot device in a long story).
Instead, DO decide to set it after, or not provide a setting.

Tip 8: DON'T take it too seriously.
Why? Most people's favorite character? Not Ron. Few people will read it, and if you take it too seriously, it will be unreadable anyway.
Instead, DO Have a little fun. Comedy will make the depressing parts even more dramatic. (Anyone who has read and understands Catch-22 knows what I'm talking about.)

Tip 9: DON'T write it as a songfic.
Why? Life isn't like a movie.
Instead, DO just write it.

Tip 10: DON'T be so angsty.
Why? There are so many beautiful places where you can cry yourself out.
Instead, DO think about them as you write, so that you're not permanently damaged.


I had to do a little research on this one, and a large inspiration for #7 and 9 was Numb by xBrokenxMistakex.

Which I accidentally totally dissed.
Reviews are what keeps people happy...

I'm a beta for an indecent number of fandoms, so send me the stories!
Yay for active betas!!!