A/N: So, this started out really cute and fluffy like the other ones but then I saw a text post on Tumblr and was like "Jude and Connor would totes have a colored baby" and this half fic that has been sitting in my drive forever gained a legit plot (and right on time for Halloween too). So we have me making Connor an awesome, hot dad standing up for his adorable af little baby (who is dressed like a burrito, yeah I do what I fucking want).

Connor hates Jude.

Seriously, he hates him with a passion burning hotter than a thousand suns.

Ok yeah, that is a complete and utter lie. Connor loves the fucker, he wouldn't be married to him if he didn't.

There's this line though.

It's pretty blurred most of the time, but sometimes

He's lucky fall in San Francisco is pretty chilly, otherwise he'd be dying in his fucking leather pants.

Yeah, you heard right, leather.

This is where the Connor hating Jude comes in. Jude is the reason he's even wearing them. It was all a bet, a stupid bet Connor forgot all about until Jude fucking won it. The bet itself was simple: whoever could steal more socks in ten years can make the other do whatever was previously agreed upon by both of them.

They were barely 23 when they made the bet and Connor literally forgot about it by the time they were 24. Jude, on the other hand, stole about 200 pairs of socks from Target over the last ten years. Connor stole a grand total of 5. So, Jude gets three "Connor has to wear whatever pair of pants I want him to" cards.

Hence, the leather pants.

The punishment isn't even that bad. Sure, the pants aren't the most comfortable things in the world, but his ass looks absolutely spectacular in them and Connor's worn worse. It's the venue Connor's having a problem with. In Connor's opinion, leather pants are not appropriate for taking your three year old daughter trick-or-treating for the first time.

Said daughter, his little Olivia, is dressed as a princess. Little pink dress and little tiara and her pink little jack-o-lantern. She is the cutest thing Connor ever did see. Jack, the baby, is asleep in the stroller, wearing a burrito costume Jude thought was "just so adorable, Jack is going to look adorable in this oh my God." And then there's Jude, dressed as a cowboy. He's literally just wearing jeans, one of Connor's plaid shirts, and a cowboy hat that they found in their bedroom closet when they moved into their apartment.

And Connor is a punk rocker. Accompanying his leather pants is a stupid as fake leather vest and one of those nude shirts with tattoos on it. And Jude just had to style his hair in a stupid ass mohawk and fucking spray paint it green. He even has eyeliner on. Eyeliner.

Connor looks like he should be getting high in the woods, not taking his kids out trick-or-treating.

He's getting a lot of looks. They're either concerned or flirtatious and Connor just wants to sink into the cement and die. Parents either think he's a piece of meat to be oogled at or a pedifile. Just great.

Ok, now let's set the scene.

Connor's just standing on the sidewalk in all his punk rock glory, watching over his sleeping son when a mom walks up to him. Connor sighs because this woman, whose kids are probably only two feet away from them, is probably going to hit on him.

But what happens is so much worse.

"Excuse me, is that your baby?"

Whatever Connor was going to say dies in Connor's throat. He's so caught off guard by the question he just stares at her for a few seconds, mouth open and mind spinning. "Yes?" he answers, but it comes out as more of a question because how are you supposed to answer a question like that?

The woman's hands go to her hips. "Ok, sure, you have a black baby." The woman's voice is condescending and sarcastic and Connor's caught of guard once again. It is true, Jack is Ethiopian, Jude and Connor had adopted him when he was brought to the US for medical treatment. He looks nothing like Jude and Connor, but never before has someone questioned whether or not he's their son. "You know what, this is a safe neighborhood. I'm on the neighborhood watch and am not afraid to call the cops if you don't step away from that baby right now."

That's what snaps Connor into reality. "Ok, wait. This is my son. He's adopted."

The woman scoffs and Connor really wishes that she'd have just hit on him. That would have been way better. "It's a little unnatural, don't you think? Having a black baby growing up in a white household?"

Connor stops because this bitch did not just say that. "So you think giving this baby a home is unnatural just because we don't look the same? Because this baby happens to have more melanin in his skin than I do? I didn't realise giving children good homes was such a bad thing. Maybe next time I'll just let him die in Ethiopia because he can't get the medical treatment he needs. Or let him starve in an orphanage stuffed with kids. I'll just go tell all the white parents that just want to love and raise a child but can't do that because of fucking biology to just leave the kids in Africa because it's unnatural."

When Connor stops the woman is looking at him with wide eyes. A few people had stopped and watched, but many had just kept walking. "Yeah, and if you thinks that's bad than you should know I'm super fucking gay." And with that he turned around, right into Jude with Olivia in his arms.

"C'mon, babe, let's go," Jude said and Connor fell into step with Jude, his husband's hand coming to rest on the small of his back. "I have to say," Jude breathed, his hand traveling down from the small of Connor's back to his leather covered ass. "You standing up for our son is hotter than your butt in those pants."

"Yeah, yeah, wait until we get the kids to bed and then you can look at it all you want, ya nerd."