Lovesick
It had been eight weeks. Eight long, tedious weeks that Syed had kept up the pretence: the pretence of not loving him; the pretence of being 'cured.' Christian knew, he could feel it, that Syed still loved him. It was just how to make him see. He knew he couldn't push it, not after what he had done at the flat-warming, but he couldn't cope without him. Christian scoffed at himself. Since when did Christian Clarke fall in love? One night stands-yes. Love-no. Why did Sy have to change all that?
He'd tried talking to Roxy. All he'd got out of her was, "go out on the town," or, "forget him, find yourself a new man." He didn't want a new man. He wanted Syed.
A voice in the back of his head kept whispering to him, "but you hate everything you want but can't have." This used to be true, but no matter how hard Christian tried, he couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't hate Syed. He just couldn't. He loved everything about him, from his deep brown eyes to his checked shirts; from the way he said Christian's name to the smile that lit up his face.
There was no other word to describe it, and Christian knew it. He was lovesick.
Syed felt like screaming. He had told Tambo time and time again: no matter what Allan told him; no matter what his parents said, he just couldn't do it. He couldn't stop loving him. Christian. The man was on his mind 24/7. He had prayed so hard. He had asked Allah for help and guidance. He had questioned what he should do and still, the answer he always came to was, "Christian Clarke."
Whenever he closed his eyes all he could remember were the rippling muscles of Christian's arms that held him tight and made him feel safe. All he could taste was the softness of Christian's lips on his and all he could hear was the way his name fell so eloquently from them. All he could see were emerald green eyes that he was so easily lost in. All he could smell was Christian's scent, so individually unique that it made his head spin. All he could feel was his heart breaking.
Everything Christian did made him feel like a lovesick teenager. Syed knew he couldn't live much longer without him. H knew that he, his God, his parents and most definitely Allan were all powerless to stop it.
