He does not hurry through the halls, as one might be expected to when they make such a discovery. No, he has never been one to succumb to such desires, as attractive as they might be. Unlike his apprentice, who always chafes at the ideals he has been brought to know, he falls into the quiet complacency with ease.
It's also a good opportunity to think, and think he must when such a dilemma is set before him. It is not a dilemma, truly, but yet, a situation he has never expected to find himself in, and a particularly perplexing one at that. He's grown used to the way his life is now, and to find such a discovery, such a possibility, it is unheard of in his life.
But things never go as one expects, does it?
How many times can he testify to that being the truth?
He is contemplative as he turns off of one of the main halls and into a smaller, less grand one that leads to the Master quarters. It is a familiar path, one that he takes often, and it gives him even more chance to immerse himself in his thoughts. This hall has fewer occupants than the last, all regarding him with respectful silence, a courtesy he returns them without thought.
In his hands is a datapad, powered off and inconspicuous, but it holds a wealth of information. Names, faces, people he has never known are connected to him. Hundreds, if not thousands of them, though only three he deems worth his notice. He will look at them again, once in the safety of his own room, and he will memorize every detail about them.
After all, they were family.
For some reason, he has never thought about his origins. He has always assumed he was another temple baby, raised from birth among his peers. Memories have been forgotten, of water and wind and grass, of pretty green eyes and a soft voice. He dreams of a woman, sometimes; a red headed nymph with a quiet passion for life and love. She is occasionally accompanied by another, a man, all laughs and warm encouragement.
There is a girl, too, but he has never heard of her before. She is beautiful, a lady in her own way. There is no doubt that she is his sister- one need only look at their eyes. She is all elegance and fire, a combination he cannot wait to see in action.
And see it he will.
He has no questions when the Council tells him he is given meditation leave, neither does he second guess the pull to go, to take advantage of the short reprieve in an ever more life occupying war.
He does not tarry long in his room, taking time only to pack the necessary things. He will not linger in the quarters, not wanting to pass his apprentice on his way out. The boy is too easily attached, and will not understand the sense of respectful distance one must keep. Though he never admits what happened on a rogue mission to Tatooine, it isn't hard to tell that the woman is no more. He has felt the grief from the younger man, often coupling with anger and regret, and he avoids the topic.
His ship- at least, the one given to him for the outing- is already being prepared for him when he arrives in the main hangar. The padawans who have been assigned to the task are eager to take on such a responsibility. After all, he is one of the greatest Jedi of all time. He excels in all fields, a prodigy that was nearly passed over. To them, he is perfect, exercising such self control. It is rare, for any of them to be allowed to visit their families. A compliment, rarely bestowed upon any Master.
He waves away the words of praise and awe, for he doesn't deserve them. There is nothing special about him, regardless of what the tabloids claim. He is no different from any of them, and he makes it his duty to tell them so.
They don't believe him.
So, after a gentle remonstrance, he leaves them to their ignorance and boards the ship, grateful for the solitude. A tiny, unfamiliar coil of excitement unfurls in him as he navigates the busy Coruscant traffic, and it slowly grows as he inputs the unfamiliar coordinates into the navicomputer. By the time he is cleared for the jump to hyperspace, he is ready to face whatever is ahead of him. He is at a convergence of his life, where what is and what might have been will meet for the first time.
Perhaps, he will finally find where he belongs.
