Breathe. There's nothing there. I pull the sheet closer to my shivering form as I break into another cold sweat. Outside my window the wind howls loudly and the eaves groan. I huddled into a fetal position and began to shake uncontrollably. An eerie voice calls me. Shoving my fist into my mouth I let out a muffled scream. I scream inwardly, "There's no one! No one, NOTHINGS THERE!
The voice replies, "But you know that's not true," the coarse voice seems to echo in my head. Whimpering I begin to pound my head into the wall and the voices screams at me to stop. I continue with more force. The pain numbs my senses and all I see is a blinding white light as my head comes into contact with the now bloodied wall. A few minutes later I pass out from the pain with the voice shouting at me all the while.
I wake up with a dull headache in a strange room, a white, padded room. The room has one solitary light, a blinding incandescent light. My mind screams NO as realization hits me. In what the small part of my mind that is not overcome with fear and other emotions which I cannot name or recognize, knows is futile I struggle to move my arms. They won't move. My mind seems to disintegrate and I feel as if I am losing my grip of reality. Slowly I get up and walk around the room looking warily about me. I stop at the lone mirror and stare at my reflection in shock. My usually well-kept red hair is entangled to my skull with blood and sweat. My once bright and happy eyes are sunken in and bloodshot and my skin is eerily pale.
My reflection laughs hollowly at me and begins to speak.
"Look at yourself. So broken, so small. You were on top of the world just yesterday. Smiling, laughing, teasing those you loved." It stops here to laugh, the sound crazed and devoid of life.
"Do you even remember who put us here?"
"Do you even remember WHY they put us here?"
"Do you even know WHY we've gone insane?"
It stops here and I look into the inexpressive green eyes for answers to these questions. Reflexively I begin to step backwards as fragments of information flood my mind. My back touches the padded wall and I slump to the floor and begin to silently sob. Looking back to the mirror I see that the reflections crazed gaze is fixed on me, but that is least of my problems. The white of its straight jacket seems to have a black stain on it. I begin to panic. The black tinge seems to grow covering the jacket and seeping out into mirror until the reflective surface is pitch black. Like a disease it covers my reflection's skin slowly until all that can be seen is its crazed sinister smirk. Breathing shallowly I close my eyes tightly and rocking back and forth I resume my chant.
No one's there, NOTHING'S there! It's all in your head!
Soon curiosity gets the better of me and I slowly open my eyes. In doing so I suddenly wish I hadn't. My reflection's head is now slowly inching out of the mirror and unconsciously I stand screaming for help. The gritty voice echoes in my head and the reflection mocks me, taunts me, telling me with smug satisfaction that no one will help me.
A silent question lingers in my mind, "Why."
The reflection laughs again, "Because they were told not to."
I find myself gaining courage and ask loudly, "Who?"
"Your brother and sister." It laughs sinisterly.
Shaking my head I scream out, "NO! YOU'RE LYING!" I run towards the mirror using the
momentum from the dash to throw my body into it. It shatters, the shards fly around me, the biggest
lodging themselves into my arms and legs. As they impact, the room is filled with blood curling
screams, my reflections and mine. Soon voices can be heard along with pounding footsteps coming
my ways. Slowly I succumb to the pain, black steadily crowding my vision, but before I slip into
nothingness something jolts me into awareness. With great effort I stand, the blood flows freely
pooling around my mutilated body. The door flies open to reveal four muscle-bound orderlies and
warily they enter circling me. The one directly in front of me brandishes a needle filled with what I
think is sedative and for some reason I do not recall I begin to laugh and walk slowly towards him
leaving a trail of blood in my wake. I try to move my arms once again and with a snap the bounds
on the straight jacket rip. Using my left arm which is the least painful to move I pull a shard from my
right upper arm and hold it to my throat, precisely where I know the jugular vein to be. Out of the
corner of my eye I notice the size of the shard, about one foot long, hardly a shard. As I press it to
my neck one of the orderlies rushes me, knocking me to the ground. Instinctively I ram the shard
into the back of his shoulder and drag it to the front. He yells out in pain and rolls off me writhing in
agony. The gash spurts blood like a geyser, spraying everyone in the room. I sneer menacingly
realizing I must have hit the subclavin vein and the demented laugh of my reflection resounds in my
mind. I wipe the bloodied shard in my pants to clean it. Bringing it to eye level, I notice my
reflection is drenched in blood and nodding its head in approval. In fear I grip the shard tightly, so
tightly the palm of my hand bleeds adding to the amount of blood around me.
Dropping it, I get to my feet sobbing uncontrollably and holding my left palm in my right I continue my trek towards the orderly. I plead with him, "Please, help me. Don't put me to sleep. She'll get me if you do." I hear the reflections demented laughter once more. "Please, please don't!" I fall to the floor at his feet; mine refusing to hold me up any longer. My dying body is wracked with sobs and I struggle to breath. The two remaining orderlies pick me up and begin to take me only God knows where.
In the sea of white I see two familiar faces. I call out to them but they ignore me and turn back towards a doctor. I struggle in the orderlies grasp and by some miracle I break free and feebly run to the faces. I recognize them, my brother and my sister, and for the first time in two days I feel safe. That only lasted for a moment. My ssister cruelly pushes me to the ground and begins kicking my already battered body. Strangled screams escape me and I call out to the many white clad orderlies for help. NO ONE MOVES! "Why won't you help me?" I see some turn away shamefully as the moonlight shines through a window and alights a plaque just above my head. It reads, 'The Carr Asylum and Mental Clinic'. It then hits me so hard and fast I am unable to breathe; all confusion and self-pity is turned into hatred and the answers to the questions I was asked before become clear.
Why am I here?
I'm here because they put me here. They want my inheritance and the only way to get it is to either have me killed or for me to go insane.
Why have I gone insane?
I have gone insane because for me, someone who was sheltered all her life, loved, protected, the thought that they were planning to murder me drove me over the edge. My stepmother and stepsister.
Why would no one help me?
They couldn't, they were paid not to and afraid to. If they could do this to family what would they do to them?
I grab the foot kicking me and twist it, bringing my sister down hard to the marble floor. My brother yanks her up and puts her body between the two of us. Once again I struggle to my feet smiling disturbingly as they back up to the ledge of a window behind them in apparent fear. Using my loathing for them as fuel I charge them shouting, " You wanted me dead, I'm going to die soon!" my voice sounds heartless, the statement coming out in singsong. The force from the push sends us crashing out of the window. As we fall thirty stories to our demise I shout to them, "Who's going to get the money now! All this for money! I love you both so much it hurts! I thought you loved me too, but you really hated me, all this time. The smiles, the kind words, ALL LIES!"
We hit the concrete with sickening thuds and from their moans I could tell it hurt, but thankfully it doesn't for me; I've become numb to pain. The moon begins to shine again as the dark clouds that covered it roll away and to me it feels as if the same is done to my muddled mind. I'm no longer afraid to close my eyes for fear of darkness overwhelming me. The silvery light scatters across the grotesque scene and I drift off into a never-ending sleep, a peaceful smile on my mangled form.
ENDTHE
ANGEL PEN
6
END
