Inuyasha and the WacDnald's Drive Thru Attendant of Doom

Okay, okay, okay, you know the drill: Inuyasha and gang do not belong to me. They belong to a nice lady named Rumiko Takahashi who is currently somewhere in Japan. (Looks at five-inch big world map.) Yeah, I'm sure that red glob there is supposed to be Japan… or ketchup. But seriously, do I look like Mme. Rumiko Takahashi? No? Then you no sue me. G3. Capice?

Inuyasha and the WacDnald's Drive Thru Attendant of Doom

an Inuyasha fanfiction

by

mkh2

" "            indicates speaking

' ' / ( )            indicates thoughts, specifically my thoughts (yes, I'm going to be in this story. :gasps of horror: Now, now, it won't be that bad.)

Bleh – for some reason my profile refuses to look the way I want it to (glowers at it.)

More importantly, the italics and underlining won't show up in my ficcy. :pouts: My first one, too. Oh well, here goes everything, anything and nothing.

~

            Having recently enrolled as a study abroad student at one of the local college campuses in the pricey Azuba district of Tokyo, I also listed myself as a part time "tutor-for-hire" (are there any other kinds of tutors?) for extra laundry change. After all, everything in Tokyo is so expensive.

Picking up my schedule, I after looking over the address, went to the house of my first student ever (not that I'm planning to be a teacher and not including those last-minute, late-night, free-tutoring sessions for a neighboring boy as per request of the lady of the house who gave me some nice babysitting jobs on occasion.) On a different note, I would have my other five students (tutees?) on different days – two tomorrow, one the day after that, and the other two – twin brothers who were supposedly real terrors – on Saturdays.

When I arrived at the address printed on the tutoring schedule, I found myself at the bottom of numerous steps leading to a shrine somewhere hidden at the top that I could not see. (I assumed that there was a shrine there, probably because of those huge wooden posts set up like a door without a wall attached whose name I could never seem to get my mouth around and will not even bother with.)

"Oh holy Mozzarella," I muttered.

Grumbling, I trudged the whole way up the stairs. When I reached the top, I glanced back and down them.

"Blessed be the name of the cheese – I climbed all that with ten minutes to spare."

As I started to walk toward the house I heard some shrieking and yelling.

"Eh?" I looked around.

"Next time I should just Kaze no Kizu him!" cam and angry male voice.

"Inuyasha – oswurai," came a slightly heated female voice. "He's just a friend, nothing for you to be mad at."

"Feh."

'Ah, a little lover's quarrel – how lovely,' I mused, recalling similar events my sister had with her long time boyfriend.

"Now you have to go – I have a tutor coming over today and I'm not going to miss it."

Out of a nearby… shrine? little tool shed? shack? I wasn't quite sure what… stormed a pretty young dark-haired schoolgirl in her sailor fuku and soon following behind was a young with long silver hair (I'm jealous) in a loud red kimono. I grinned. 'Must be her.'

"Oi!" I hollered. "Kon'wa – are you Miss Higurashi?" I inquired as I caught her attention.

"Aa," she replied. "Are you my tutor?"

"Yuppers." I smiled. "And is your boyfriend going to join our tutoring session?" I nodded to Mr. So-Platinum-Blonde-I-Make-Marilyn-Monroe-Spin-In-Her-Grave-Out-Of-Jealousy.

She turned bright red. He blinked.

"Ara – not my boyfriend, but he's coming anyways – if he insists on bugging us."

"Really?" I turned sharp eyes on him before giving him a sugary sweet smile. "Well," I said in a voice dripping with enough sugar to require one to get dentures, "he can come if he wants but if he bugs us, or namely you – me when I'm talking, I'll dropkick him out the door and down the shrine stairs. And if that doesn't work I have some nice clippers in my bag that I can use to sever those cute ears from the top of that fluffy little head of his."

He blanched.

~

Tutoring went quite well. Inuyasha sat quietly fidgeting, occasionally interjecting a comment - sometimes good, sometimes… stupid – or asking random questions. After breezing through two hours of the tutoring (I taught English, Japanese, American and world history, and the maths required – I know the stuff, not the category), the torture, er, I mean tutor session was over.

"Ah! That's nice. How about I take you two for a treat?"

"Treat?" Inuyasha asked. He tilted his head and twitched his ears.

"Aah! Cute!" I latched onto his ears and gave them an affectionate rub. "Y'know, food? We'll get something to eat!"

"Ramen?" he suggested.

"WacDnald's is good," offered Kagome. "And I haven't been there in sometime."

"Cool! WacDnald's it is," I clapped my hands together. "Inny, get a hat and, Kagome, find him some slippers at least – I don't want his dirty feet all over my car."

"We're driving?" Kagome asked as she hopped about getting her shoes on, Inuyasha grumbling about being called "Inny" as he pulled a red baseball cap on.

"Correction: I'm driving, you two are just comin' along for the ride."

~

"Ooh, I know – let's go through the drive thru – it's a waste of gas, I know, but the parking lot is full and it's too hot to be out in the sun for more than a few minutes," I commented gaily as I circled through the drive thru to stop in front of the glowing menu.

"So, you two, pick what you like."

"Okay." Kagome and Inuyasha looked at the menu.

"Hey Kags and Inu-chan –" Inuyasha growled. "Wanna do the ordering for yourselves?" He perked up.

"Alright, if you can't do it yourself since you're so weak." He puffed his chest up and proudly surveyed the um, car interior.

"Heh, don't flatter yourself," I sweatdropped.

"I'll order mine first, then Kag, you order yours, then you Inu-baby."

"Ghk?" he choked.

"Sounds good to me," grinned Kagome.

I pulled up to the speaker and cleared my throat. "Hello?"

"Ah-low?" (Translation: Hello?)

Strange, I could've sworn I've heard that voice somewhere…

"Yeah, hi-hi, I'd like a number, no onions, with crispy fries," I ordered.

"Wha kinda coke do you want?"

I stiffened up. I know I've heard that voice somewhere.

"Ah, I'd like a chocolate shake…" I muttered nervously.

"Ah ha, 'n anyt'ing else?"

Kagome leaned past Inuyasha, who turned bright red – especially his nose and ears. 'I just wanna *grab* em!'

"I'd like a number three, no mayo, and easy on the mustard."

"Ah ha, an' wha kinda coke do you want?"

"A diet Sprite."

Okay, everything looks fine so far… maybe this will go through without a hitch.

Inuyasha's turn came. Taking his cue from us, confidently he ordered his choice.

"I'd like a number two and, um… two chocolate chip cookies, and an extra medium fry."

'Glutton.' Pay no mind to the fact that my dashboard looks like a mini 7-11 and I have an extra goody stash under the passenger side seats… or the cooler with sodas and chips in the trunk…

"Ah ha, an' wha kinda coke do you want?"

"A coke." 'Uh oh…'

"Ah sai', wha kinda coke do you want?"

"A coke."

"Wha kinda coke do you want?"

"A coke!"

"Wha kinda coke do you want?"

"A coke!"

"Wha kinda coke do you want?"

All of a sudden a voice was distinctly heard in the background.

"What kind of soda do you want!"

"Oh, what kind of soda do you want?"

"A COKE!" Inuyasha looked definitely ready to kill… and I don't blame him.

~

As we sat under the Goshinboku – the Sacred God Tree, as it were – munching on our food, Inuyasha kept glaring at his soda.

I glanced over at him feeling sorry for having to put him through that at his first time ordering at a drive through… I know how it feels from experience.

"Ya know," I stated loudly, causing both Kagome and Inuyasha to look up sharply at me, "Next time we should just Kaze no Kizu 'em!"

Inuyasha grinned.

~Owari.~

Seriously, when I was around eight, the very same thing happened to me. I wanted to order at the McDonald's drive thru near where I live and Mom and Dad were all, "sure, why not?" However, when I started to order – my first time, mind you – and I got to where I had to specify my drink preference and – bam! – the whole convo bit Inuyasha did occurred, except mine went on for over two minutes before that nice girl butted in (sounded like she had to yell long distance, wonder where she was.)

My parents (after laughing – not at me, but about how another person had to come to our rescue – they particularly like my "A Coke!" shriek at the end) said that they felt so sorry for me… I bet I was all red in the face and watery eyed – I still get like that sometimes from over exertion and I was half hanging out the window in the back. .

Little blurb, sorta related to the ficcy:

"Nah," Inuyasha said, munching on a Big Mac, "We did get all this free food." :Gestures to enough food to feed a small army, or Inuyasha for three days: ^w^

Kagome: "sigh." -,-

Me: @_@ "Where did all THAT come from?!"