Disclaimer: I do not own Yashy. I wish I could but I can't. Aw man...
Author's Note: This one-shot came to me while I'm was watching/listening to an Inuyasha AMV. It's also called I'm Still here. And here is the link if you want to watch it: http/ school bell rings - again
Inuyasha watched as Kikyo left him again. Her soul collectors followed her as she waded through the mist of the night. Both old lovers didn't know modern eyes had watched them. But somehow Inuyasha knew. He had smelt her and heard her cries of despair as he said what she had never wanted him to say.
"Why do this Inuyasha?" Kikyo asked as soul collectors flew around her dead form, souls attached to their tiny legs.
Inuyasha looked to the ground and sighed. "Kikyo... I-I... I love-"
Rain clouds come to play again
"Don't..." replied Kikyo. She wished they could go back to the way they were before Naraku was in the picture, but they couldn't. She didn't have a life anymore, he did. He could have a better life than the one she could have ever given him. "What we had... before... can never be again. I am releasing you from my eternal grasp. Be with Kagome. She seems to make you happy and-"
"But I can't!" shouted Inuyasha as he shut his eyes rather roughly. Frustration took over his being. He couldn't just leave her behind! Yet... Kagome... "Kikyo... I can't just... leave you behind! Sure Kagome is here. But what you hold in my heart..." He put a hand to his own heart for emphasize. "Kikyo... I... I love you! I have since before Naraku destroyed what we had. But he can't destroy the way I feel for you!"
Has no one told you she's not breathing?
That alone made Kikyo and Kagome gasp at the tone of his voice and the words that left his hanyou lips.. "Inuyasha..." Kikyo started. "You can't leave Kagome behind. She needs you... more than I do. You know she also holds your heart. Maybe more than my place was in your heart. What we had before was destroyed. I do not hold the same feelings for you as I once did. You should realize that too! Admit to yourself that my role in your life has disappeared and Kagome has not filled that spot but made an even bigger part of your heart. Made you more of the man you could have always been and have become. Admit it. I have... and I know now... that you are just relishing in what we had before and what you do not see before you. Kagome...! She loves you baka and you should figure it out! Before... I hadn't loved you, merely wished I could make a life with you as a normal woman. Figure it out. My spot in your heart has disappeared and Kagome has filled your heart. Figure. It. Out!" With all of that said she left. Anger reflected in her eyes and filled her mind. All she wished was that he could figure out everything for himself.
Slowly turning around to face the crying girl, Inuyasha frowned. The scent of tears were every where. Just like the aura of heartbreak filled the night's air. "Kagome..."
Hello, I'm your
mind giving you someone to talk to
Hello
At the sound of her name Kagome picked herself off the ground and turned to him with teary red eyes. "Inuyasha... I'm... I'm sorry!" Kagome ran off, forgetting her bright yellow book bag behind as she ran with all her might. Tears flying in the air to only set themselves in the dry feudal soil.
"Kagome... wait..." Inuyasha whispered as he lifted an arm towards the running girl. His voice taunt with guilt and sorrow. He hadn't meant for her to hear that. It's just that he didn't know exactly what his heart felt when both women were near to him. When just one was around the side of his heart with the women in it called to him while when both were together he was confused.
What have I done! Baka, baka, baka! You probably destroyed whatever relationship you ever had with her! His own demonic and humanist heart thought. It felt as if his whole heart called out to Kagome. His whole being calling for her nearness, her touch, her scent, her soul.
He turned back to the tree that seemed to always give him his answers. The Goshinboku. The tree that he had been pinned in the eternal sleep on. When he was in that sleep he had a deep connection with this tree. Walking up to fell the tree's bark, Inuyasha whined.
He had just made his life just a little bit harder.
If I smile and don't - believe
Kagome had seen it all and he knew no way to get her to forgive him. He didn't deserve to be forgiven; he had deliberately given her pain. He hurt her. Something he had promise to never do. Even hurt her emotionally which was worse then the physical pain he had learned to get used to when he got into his fights.
Should he go and ask her forgiveness? Should he go to say sorry and have her stay in her era? All were questions he wished he could have the answers reach his sensitive ears and tell him what to do instead of giving him an option.
How was he going to do this?
--------
Kagome dried her tears to only have more take their place. She sat on the lip of the bone eaters well, crying.
She had always known somewhere in her heart that he loved Kikyo. She was after all still his first love.
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream
But god dammit! She was still here! Kagome... she was still here! Had what Kikyo said be left unheard by the hanyou? Had he not even taken his love's words by heart just because it didn't involve her love for him?
Kagome... that one simple name meant more to, to many people than any other name. Except to the hanyou it meant 'second'. Kikyo was first and she was second. She had prepared herself for this heartache long before but it failed. Right now all she wanted to do was crawl under a rock and die. Not only did she want to do that but she also wanted to go home. To bad she couldn't do that.
Smiling slightly, even through her own tears, Kagome looked into the darkness of the well.
She had made the final decision. She had decided to stay in the feudal era to stay with Inuyasha. She had decided to give up her home era to live with the one she loved. To bad he didn't love her back.
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken
Now she would have to live in this accursed era that would make her miserable for the rest of her life. And it was his entire fault. All Inuyasha's fault. Him and his stupid, confused heart! If it wasn't for her then... if it wasn't for Kikyo...
She had already saved Kikyo once. She only hoped Kikyo would save her life in return.
Maybe the 'talk' with Inuyasha was her way of helping her? Well apparently it didn't work.
Hello, I'm the
lie living for you so you can hide
Don't cry
Another sigh escaped Kagome before she felt a surge of pain hitting her chest. Putting a hand to her chest, Kagome began to pant in rigid breaths. The pain was intense, throbbing lie all her blood was rushing to her chest and brain. Her mind set itself on Inuyasha as if this was her last moments of her short and unfulfilled life.
Kagome turned her head to her right. Her vision blurred and the only thing she could hear was the increased beating of her heart. Turning her head to her left Kagome gasped. "Ki... kyo... help..."
The only thing Kikyo did was stare at her and answer. But when she found Kagome could not hear she mouthed it more clearly:
Here's your help.
Kagome's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as her heartbeat quickened. The pain was increasing just like the beating of her heart.
She needed him. She needed him to live. She needed Inuyasha. "Inu... yasha!" she breathed. "I... love you..." Then darkness engulfed her as she fell to the cold ground by the wood of the old well.
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping
-----------
Inuyasha still couldn't figure out what he should do. All was lost to him. His heart had left with Kagome. He now knew that she was here and would always be here. She was still her and his heart was with her.
Just as sudden realization hit him, he almost fell to the ground.
Since he was born he had always had a deep connection to his mate even if she wasn't anywhere in his era, she was still mentally with him. And he knew it now. His mate was Kagome. And right now he knew she was in pain.
He ran, ran to save her life. But little did he know she was gone by now.
When he made it to her he felt like he would die. There she was. Laying on the cold ground, usual happy eyes distant. Her smile gone and her mouth was open slightly, showing she had suffered. Reaching down to feel her skin as tears reached his eyes he let out a strangled cry, she was freezing. "Kagome..." he whispered. "Kagome... Kag... Kagome!" he shouted to the world.
It felt as if the world was crying with him as he cradled Kagome in his arms. Her limp form just laying in his arms.
Putting a hand to her chin, Inuyasha let his tears flow freely, he knew this was unlike. It was unlike him to cry like this. But Kagome, his mate, was dead and the only thing he thought of was crying in hopes kami himself would bring her back to be with him; to live a life with him. "Kagome..." his voice hoarse and if you had just passed by the scene you could tell just by his voice he was crying.
Hello, I'm still here
Kagome... stop joking... wake up... wake up... His own thoughts were filled with a sorrowful tone.
Turning away from her so as not to see her face full of death, Inuyasha saw something. Putting Kagome slowly on the ground and moving over to the words that were engraved into the ground.
I'm still here.
More tears entered his eyes as he turned back to Kagome. What did she mean 'I'm still here'? She was dead! How could she still be-?
"Inuyasha..." The sound of Kikyo's voice reached his ears then her form reached his eyes and he frowned. "What do you want Kikyo? I listened to your words and I was too late! She's dead and now my whole... life is dead!"
A chuckle left Kikyo's throat which pissed off Inuyasha. Next thing she knew she was face to face with Inuyasha, fangs bared and all.
"Inuyasha... there is a way to save her." Was all Kikyo had to say before the heartbroken hanyou.
"Kikyo..." he breathed. "How...?"
"All you have to do is tell her the truth. That's all she has wanted to hear."
"But," he turned back to the form of his love. He could hear a faint - a very faint - heartbeat coming from her. "She's not breathing."
"She is in a spiritual state. If you do not tell her now then she will... officially... die."
All that's left of yesterday
He gasped the next thing he knew he was by Kagome's side and holding her cold hand. "Kagome...?" he smiled weakly. His tears dried on his cheeks but more tears blurred his vision. "I want to tell you now... I was... confused before but now... I know. Kagome..." another weak smile. "I love you... I didn't know it before but Kikyo," turning to where the miko stood before he stared at the empty space before turning back to the dying angel that was in his arms. "You hold a bigger part of my heart than Kikyo has ever had. Kagome... please come back. Please live again. Please! I need you with me Kagome." A single tear slipped out of his eye and landed on Kagome's cheek.
A light took over her vision. Someone was calling her to them. That voice was familiar.
'I love you... Please live again. Please!'
Inuyasha...? Inuyasha help me! I can't... I can't... Kagome soon saw a sight she never wished to see again. "Inu..."
"Kagome, you're okay?" Inuyasha breathed.
Nodding her head, Kagome took a better hold of Inuyasha's hand and stared into his teary amber eyes. "Inuyasha I-"
"I know... I love you too." Inuyasha smiled weakly before his lips descended onto hers in a light caress.
Happiness filled Kagome as the pain was eroded away by the kiss. When the kiss ended the only thing she had to say was, "I'm still here."
I'm still here...
Author's second note: Hope you liked it. Review.
