Stop, Hammer Time

Why does this kinda stuff always seem to happen to me?

I try to be the normal one, the mediator, the brains, even! But what does it all get me? A kick in the head from my dear Captain Matthews. I fix the catapult deck, no recognition. I navigate the ship and plot our courses, no one cares. I give simple suggestions, and I get a kick in the head. Everyone's favorite pilot Tony plays with a stick all day and is showered in congratulations while I go through mounds of trouble for them and get absolutely nothing.

Of course I don't complain to their faces. I'm doing what I love to do. I just wish... they'd say "thanks" every once and a while...

"Hammer!" Matthews shouted in my ear, making me jump. "Find us a U.M.N. column and jump us outta here!" I sighed, pressing my fingertips against the buttons on the console in front of me.

"Aye, Captain," I called, "Column jump in 30 seconds." As we approached the column, I became steadily more hungry. This, I thought, was the perfect opportunity to escape the monotony of the bridge. Just as we entered hyperspace, I pushed myself up out of my seat.

"Hey, where you goin'?" Matthews asked as I headed for the door. Without turning back to face him, I muttered my response.

"Getting hungry," I said, "Gonna get some food."

"Knock yourself out, then," the Captain told me, a hint of sarcasm splattered in his voice. If any other remark was made, it went unheard as the doors slid shut behind me. I sighed. I didn't think that there was enough ice cream in the galaxy to make me feel any better. Mmm... Ice cream sounded good.

My shoes clicked on the metal floor of the Elsa as I made my way to the kitchen. As I rounded the cabins in the middle of the floor, I almost connected with Shion, who was holding a large quantity of A.G.W.S parts in her hands. She stumbled backwards a bit, then righted herself.

"Sorry! Sorry, Hammer..." she said, fumbling with the large metal gear. I caught it as it was about to hit the floor.

"You need some help?" I asked. She shook her head, a smile playing on her features.

"No, but thank you," she said. As she walked toward the elevator, she turned her head back, "Actually, I think I may have dropped something..." I immediately discovered the lost piece and placed it on top of her teetering stack.

"Here you go," I uttered. She nodded.

"Thanks, Hammer!" With that, the Vector employee started off to the bowels of the ship. I scanned the floor for any more lost pieces, and, upon finding none, continued on my way to get some food. I walked up the steps and pressed the button to open the door only to find the pink-haired MOMO standing on a stool in front of one of the cabinets. She turned at the sound of the door and smiled.

"Hello, Hammer!" she chimed. I nodded to her.

"Hey MOMO," I looked at the stool she was standing on, "You need something?"

"Actually," she started, a hint of embarrassment in her sweet voice, "I didn't think the pepper would be up so high and..."

Without thinking, I stepped up on the stool quickly and stretched my hand out, snatching the elusive pepper shaker.

"Yeah, I have no idea why Tony keeps it up there either. Here," I said, handing her the pepper.

"Thank you!" she told me, flashing her cute smile. She ran back to her tray of food, most likely off to share her lunch with Ziggy again. I shrugged, heading toward the freezer. Oh good, only one container of ice cream left... and it was all mine. I said goodbye to MOMO and went to sit in the cafe. I opened the container and looked inside. Double-chocolate with fudge: my favorite. Just as I dug into the ice cream to get my first spoonful, Allen came bursting into the cafe. He looked the room over once frantically, then sighed in despair. I tried to act as if I wasn't there, but unfortunately, he noticed me.

"Hammer... hey. Have you, er, seen the Chief?" he asked, his face contorted with worry, "She left this on the bridge..." He held up a small but vital-looking A.G.W.S. part in his left hand.

"She just left for the A.G.W.S. hangar," I told him, just wanting to get back to my ice cream. Allen's face lit up with new light, and he smiled broadly.

"Hey, thanks!" he voiced, gripping the part Shion had accidentally left behind as he turned to leave. After he had, I began to eat again, and as I did I couldn't help but think that there was something wrong with that guy. I picked the ice cream container up with one hand and scooped the last remnants of chocolate ice cream from the bottom with my spoon in the other. I felt a little better, but still feeling unfulfilled, I grabbed another dessert, a small piece of stale cake, and began to go down the elevator. I shoveled the cake down my throat in the short ride to the bottom floor. Upon exiting, however, I found myself face-to-face with the cyborg Ziggy. he stood in the hallway in front of me for a few moments, then he spoke.

"Hammer, you are just the man I wanted to see," he said. I felt a sudden pang of pride, and I emerged from the elevator to join him.

"Whadda ya need?" I asked him as the two began walking toward the catapult deck.

"The ship MOMO and I used to escape the U-TIC Organization still sits where it landed, correct?" he asked.

"Yeah, unless the Captain ejected it without me knowing."

"I believe that it may have some salvageable parts which may be of some value to either Captain Matthews or yourself. I was wondering if you wished to help me disassemble it."

"Why not?" I said, adding, to myself, "No one else on this ship needs me anyway..."

Ziggy was right. Some pretty valuable parts were in that hunk of junk. We spent at least a good two hours picking through that parts, and we probably could have continued if Captain Matthews hadn't come over the intercom.

"Hammer! Get your ass up to the bridge!" he demanded. I grumbled lightly, getting down from inside the hulking carcass of the U-TIC ship. I turned to Ziggy, who had been taking apart one of the engines on the ground. He stood, trying to wipe some grease spots off himself. I sighed.

"You can take whatever parts you want, then," I said.

"I forgot to thank you," Ziggy called after me.

"Naw, don't worry about it," I told him, heading for the exit. My demeanor fell when I left the catapult deck, and the drudge to the bridge was close to miserable. When I finally showed on the bridge, Matthews was exasperated.

"He arrives!" the Captain announced obtrusively, "We gotta get outta hyperspace, kid."

"Right," I muttered. I pressed the few buttons that were necessary, then moved to get up. I heard Matthews stir in his seat.

"Hey Hammer! You've had an attitude all day! You got somethin' to say to me then say it!" That did it. I spun around, ready to scream.

"Captain, I navigate, plot, investigate, fix and make trajectories constantly on the ship and I never get any-" I was going to say 'I never get any thanks', but I thought back to earlier that day, back to Shion, MOMO, Allen and Ziggy. I remembered each of them really, sincerely smiling and thanking me. I remembered how good it made me feel to be thanked like that.

"Hey, kid, you fall asleep mid-sentence?" Matthews' voice came again. I snapped back to reality and blinked a few times. "You were saying somethin'?" I looked to the floor, remembering their thanks, then looked back to my Captain and shook my head.

"No... No, forget it," I said with a slight smile. I moved back to my station, just in time to hear Captain Matthews utter:

"I'm surrounded by morons."

End.