Note: I wrote this on the spot after finishing up Code Geass and not having anything else to do with my conflicting emotions and spinning thoughts. I love Lelouche so much and felt I wanted to be more in his mind. This is my attempt so sorry if it sucks and that is really short.

BTW: I don't own Code Geass obviously and some of this writing uses quotes from the anime.


Why do I lie? The answer is simple: because it's easier. I'd rather Suzaku hate me for something I didn't do than pity me for that reason. I prefer to condemn myself and live a life in solitude than face reality and try to piece apart all that I've broken. The world needs to be changed and so I shall change it. If good turns evil to destroy an even greater evil, the new evil must be punished. I live the lie of living and am prepared to follow the irrevocable rules, that I myself have made. After all, only those prepared to be killed should kill. Should sin upon sin follow in my wake and souls burning with scorn pile up at my feet, I'll keep on heading towards my goal. And for that reason, when I stop and accomplish what I must, the darkness will finally catch up to me.

I've gone too far to stop now. Too many lives have been sacrificed that to turn away would be to spit on their graves. My hands are tainted with the crimson blood of the dead and all the hatred in the world is beginning to slowly build on my shoulders. However, I can't let it break me; not yet anyways. I have to wait and bear it all, every last cry, until I've soaked it all up and nothing, absolutely nothing is left. Yes, that is my goal; to make this world a better place. From the tangle and epitome or despair, a new dawn, a new day will raise. That is the meaning of zero. From the nothingness of hatred, creation and change will be born.


Note: Thanks so much for reading! Please tell me what you think.