The soil was damp beneath my knees and the marble was cold against my back. Too cold. The people in black were already begining to leave. But that was okay, because I wanted to have one more private goodbye with my boyfriend. Who now lay under 6ft of soil.
"Oh Phil, what am I going to do without you?" I mutter. I could already feel the tears forming, but I wanted to keep them at bay for as long as possible. I had cried enough over the last eight days."If I believed in wishes." I felt a tear slide down my cheek and I shivered. "As silly as it seems, I'd turn back the sands of time and save you." The tears were flowing freely now. I was surprised that I had any left. "If I believed in dreams, If I believed in magic, If I believed in good, I'd have been a better boyfriend. I'd make our troubles disappear. If I believed I could." My shoulders were shaking, and my breath came in pants as I tried to speak through the sobs that made my body quiver. I felt a sudden surge of anger and hatred towards the universe that had allowed my boyfriend to die so prematurely. I raised my voice to a near shout, standing up and confronting the stars face to face. "But wishes are dreams. And dreams are pretend. Science and reason alway win out in the end." I through my arms wide open, confronting every God there was in the sky "Science says you're dead and gone forever. Reason says I'm talking to the air, but something in my heart, this secret hidden part, illogically insists that you are there. Somewhere!"
I was running out of energy rapidly, and my voice was now reduced to a near whisper. "If I believe in wishes. If I can find the key. Perhaps it's not to late to change the course of fate. 'Cause after all I must be pretty great..."
I fell to the ground not caring if the soil ruined my suit, not caring that it was starting to drizzle with rain. Not caring if I ever got up again.
I had next to no voice left but I was determined to finish my goodbye.
"If you believed in me!"
I lay next to my boyfriend for the rest of the night, separated only by a thin layer of wood and 6ft of soil.
"I'll always love you Phil. Always."
