Into The Woods

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I don't own Into the Woods. The musical is owned by….somebody who is not me. Heh. Anyway. I don't own, Zoids, Inuyasha, Ranma ½, Rorouni Kenshin, or Gundam Wing. Nor do I own any of the aforementioned show's characters. Nor do I own the song that I sing in Scene Three. That song is "Eyes Like Yours" and is owned by Shakira. All I own is Chiyumi, Lilli, and Rina. Yume Tenshi owns Miaka and Sharpsnout owns Hawk. MereMew owns nobody here but since she's in the thing I guess I should mention her.

CAPS: Person is singing. (If in verse form)

Normal: Person is speaking.

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Cast:

Narrators: Clear Shadow, Yume Tenshi, Sharpsnout and MereMew

Jack: Himura Kenshin

Baker: Miroku

Cinderella's Stepmother: Irvine

Lucinda: Moonbay

Little Red Ridinghood: Hibiki Miaka

Cinderella's Mother: Rudolf

Wolf: P-Chan

Rapunzel: Maxwell Duo

Cinderella's Prince: Raven

Milky White (Called Yahiko-White for the sake of humor): Yahiko

Cinderella: Lilli

Jack's Mother: Kamiya Karou

Baker's Wife: Chiyumi

Florinda: Fiona

Cinderella's Father: Dr. D

Witch: Maxwell Rina

Mysterious Man: Inuyasha

Granny: Mousse

Rapunzel's Prince: Hawk

Steward: Van

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ACT ONE

Scene One

:: The stage is separated into thirds. On the left is Cinderella's house. Lilli is frozen in place as if sweeping. In the center is Jack's house. Kenshin is frozen in place as if milking Yahiko-White, a pathetic looking cow. In the—::

Yahiko-White: Excuse me?

::Yahiko-White, a pathetic white cow, what? That's what you are::

Yahiko-White: Am not!

::You are in this play, so deal with it or it's hamburgers for lunch!::

Yahiko-White: Gul….ulp.

:: Ahem. As I was saying. On the right side of the stage is the Baker's house. Miroku and Chiyumi are also frozen, making bread and …stuff::

Baker's Wife: That's not a rolling pin.

Baker: It's not?

Baker's Wife: No. That's a spatula. Get it right.

Baker: Sorry.

::Can I continue? Please?::

Baker's Wife: Oh...sorry. Please go on.

::Thank you. Anyway. The four narrators step forward::

Clear Shadow: Once upon a time—

Cinderella: ::No longer frozen, Lilli begins sweeping:: I WISH…

Yume Tenshi: —In a far off kingdom—

Cinderella: MORE THAN ANYTHING…

Sharpsnout: —Lived a young maiden—

Cinderella: MORE THAN LIFE….

MereMew: —A sad young lad—

Cinderella: MORE THAN JEWELS…

Jack: I WISH, that I do…

Clear Shadow: —And a childless baker—

Jack: MORE THAN LIFE…

Cinderella, Baker: I WISH…

Yume Tenshi:—with his wife—

Jack: MORE THAN ANYTHING…

Cinderella, Jack, Baker: MORE THAN THE MOON…

Baker's Wife: I WISH…

Cinderella: THE KING IS GIVING A FESTIVAL

Baker, Baker's Wife: MORE THAN LIFE

Jack: I WISH, that I do…

Cinderella: —I WISH TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL—

Baker, Baker's Wife: MORE THAN RICHES..

Cinderella: —AND THE BALL…

Jack: I WISH MY COW WOULD GIVE US SOME MILK.

Yahiko-White: MOO…

Cinderella, Baker's Wife: MORE THAN ANYTHING…

Baker: I WISH WE HAD A CHILD.

Jack: ::To Yahiko-White:: PLEASE, PAL—

Baker's Wife: I WANT A CHILD.

Jack: SQUEEZE, PAL

Yahiko-White: WHAT?!?!

Cinderella: I WISH TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL.

Jack: ::Overlapping:: I WISH YOU'D GIVE US SOME MILK OR EVEN CHEESE.

Baker, Baker's Wife: I WISH WE MIGHT HAVE A CHILD.

Cinderella, Jack, Baker, Baker's Wife: I WISH…

::Irvine, Fiona and Moonbay enter::

Stepmother: ::Leans into Lilli's face:: You wish to go to the festival?

Cinderella: ::snickers loudly::

Stepmother: Oh shut up. So I'm in a dress.

Cinderella: ::talks through laughter:: Cross-dresser!!

Sharpsnout: Ahem. The poor girl's mother had died—

Stepmother: You. Cinderella, the festival?

Florinda, Lucinda: The festival?!?

Stepmother, Florinda, Lucinda: The King's festival!!!???

Cinderella: What freaking festival did you think?

MereMew: —And her father had taken for his new wife a woman with two daughters of her own. All three were beautiful of face—

Cinderella: Except for Irvine!

Stepmother: Shut up!

MereMew: —But vile and black of heart.

Florinda: LOOK AT YOUR NAILS!

Lucinda: LOOK AT YOUR DRESS!

Stepmother: PEOPLE WOULD LAUGH AT YOU—

Cinderella: NEVERTHELESS—

Cinderella, Stepsisters, Stepmother: I/YOU/SHE STILL WISH/WANT/WANTS TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL—

Stepsisters, Stepmother: —AND DANCE BEFORE THE PRINCE ?!

::Irvine, Moonbay, and Fiona burst into musical laughter as Lilli glares::

Clear Shadow: Jack on the other hand, had no grandmother, and no father and his mother—

Jack's Mother: ::Walks over to Kenshin and Yahiko who are playing patty-cake:: I WISH…

Jack: We're what?

::Playing patty cake. Y'know when you clap your hands then clap one hand with your partners? You never played before?::

Jack: I don't believe so, that I don't.

::Oh…well make something up then::

Clear Shadow: Ahem. Well, she was not quite beautiful—

Jack's Mother: ::Twitches:: I WISH MY SON WHERE NOT A FOOL

I WISH MY HOUSE WAS NOT A MESS—

Yahiko-White: I WISH YOU COULD COOK…

Jack's Mother: ::Hits him with a frying pa— hey where'd you get that?:: Ceres. ::Ceres is in this thing?!?:: No, she's on the support staff. ::Oh. Ok then. Please go on.::

I WISH THE COW WAS FULL OF MILK

I WISH THE WALLS WERE FULL OF GOLD—

I WISH A LOT OF THINGS….

You foolish child! What in heaven's name are you doing with a cow inside the house?

Jack: A warm environment might be just what Yahiko-White needs to produce his milk, that it might.

Jack's Mother: ::Stunned:: It's a she!!

Yahiko-White: Am not!!!

Jack's Mother: How many times must I tell you? Only "She's" give milk!

Yahiko-White: Yeah well, I don't give milk so there you go!

::There are two knocks on the Miroku and Chiyumi's door. Chiyumi opens it and Miaka skips inside::

Baker's Wife: Why come in little girl.

Little Red Ridinghood: I WISH…

IT'S NOT FOR ME

IT'S FOR MY GRANNY IN THE WOODS

A LOAF OF BREAD PLEASE

TO BRING MY POOR OLD HUNGRY

GRANNY IN THE WOODS…

JUST A LOAF OF BREAD, PLEASE

::Miroku hands her a loaf of bread and she sticks it in her pocket::

Thank you.

Yume Tenshi: Cinderella's stepmother had a surprise for her.

::Irvine tosses lentils into the fireplace.::

Stepmother: I threw some lentils into the ashes for you. Pick 'em out in an hour and you can go to the ball.

Cinderella: I thought it was two hours.

Stepmother: That was before you made fun of me.

Cinderella: Oh for crying out—

Stepmother: Wanna make it a half hour?!

::Irvine, Fiona and Moonbay leave::

Little Red Ridinghood: AND PERHAPS A STICKY BUN?

OR FOUR? ::Sheepish grin::

Cinderella: BIRDS IN THE SKY,

BIRDS IN THE EAVES

IN THE LEAVES

IN THE FIELDS

IN THAT CASTLES AND PONDS

Little Red Ridinghood: AND A FEW OF THOSE PIES,

PLEASE

Cinderella: ::Overlapping:: COME, LITTLE BIRDS,

DOWN FROM THE EAVES

AND THE LEAVES,

OVER FIELDS,

OUT OF CASTLES AND PONDS

Jack: NO, SQUEEZE PAL…

Cinderella: ::Falls into a trance:: Huh? ::A trance, you're connecting with nature:: I'm what? ::Would you just do it?:: Alright…. AHHHHHH….

::Birds descend into the fireplace::

Cinderella: QUICK LITTLE BIRDS,

FLICK THROUGH THE ASHES.

PICK AND PECK, BUT SWIFTLY,

SIFT THROUGH THE ASHES

INTO THE POT

Jack's Mother: Listen well, son, Yahiko-White must be taken to market.

Jack: But Miss Karou no, he's the best cow, that he is!

Jack's mother: Was. Was! She's given us no milk for a week—

Yahiko-White: I never gave milk in the first place!! I am not a cow!!!!!

::Shut up would you? You're getting annoying::

Yahiko-White: Make me!

::I WILL!!! AKEMI!!! GET OUT HERE!!!::

Yahiko-White: No! Not her! She'll want to practice swordplay with me!! I'll be good! I'll be good!!!

:: Heh, Heh, Heh. Please Karou, go on. I doubt he'll interrupt again::

Jack's Mother: Thank you. She's given us no milk for a week. We've no food nor money and no choice but to sell her while she can still command a price..

Jack: But Yahiko-White is me best friend in the whole world, that he is!

Jack's Mother: Look at her!

Yahiko-White: ::glare:: MOO!

Jack's mother: THERE ARE BUG ON HER DUGS

THERE ARE FLIES IN HER EYES

THERE'S A LUMP ON HER RUMP

BIG ENOUGH TO BE A HUMP—

Jack: But—

Jack's Mother: WE'VE NO TIME TO SIT AND DITHER,

WHILE HER WITHERS WITHER WITH HER—

AND NO ONE KEEPS A FREELOADER FOR A FRIEND!!!

Sometimes I fear you're touched!

Yahiko-White: I thought I was a cow.

Jack's Mother: Yes, well you're that too.

Little Red Ridinghood: ::Miaka's been eating random sweets, she now wipes her mouth::

INTO THE WOODS

IT'S TIME TO GO

I HATE TO LEAVE

I HAVE TO THOUGH

INTO THE WOODS

IT'S TIME, AND SO

I MUST BEGIN MY JOURNEY

INTO THE WOODS

AND TROUGH THE TREES

TO WHERE I AM

EXPECTED MA'AM.

INTO THE WOODS

TO GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE—

Baker's Wife: You're certain of your way?

Little Red Riding Hood: ::picking up cookies in rhythm with the song and stuffing them in her pockets::

THE WAY IS CLEAR

THE LIGHT IS GOOD

I HAVE NO FEAR

NOR NO ONE SHOULD.

THE WOODS ARE JUST TREES.

THE TREES ARE JUST WOOD.

I SORT OF HATE TO ASK IT ,

BUT DO YOU HAVE A BASKET?

Baker's Wife: Where are you keeping all of those cookies?

Little Red Ridinghood: Ever heard of the Art of Hidden Weapons? My cousin taught me a little bit.

Baker's Wife: Ah. I see.

Baker: Here. ::Hands her a basket, which Miaka fills with all the food:: Now don't stray and be late.

Little Red Ridinghood: INTO THE WOODS

AND DOWN THE DELL,

THE PATH IT STRAIGHT,

I KNOW IT WELL.

INTO THE WOODS,

AND WHO CAN TELL

WHAT'S WAITING ON THE JOURNEY?

INTO THE WOODS

TO BRING SOME BREAD

TO GRANNY WHO

IS SICK IN BED

NEVER CAN TELL

WHAT LIES AHEAD

FOR ALL THAT I KNOW

SHE'S ALREADY DEAD.

::Begins skipping offstage::

BUT INTO THE WOODS

INTO THE WOODS

INTO THE WOODS

TO GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE

AND HOME BEFORE DARK!

Baker's Wife: ::Calls after her:: And save some of those sweets for granny! They'll go right to your hips otherwise!!

::The birds got the lentils for Lilli and are now flying away::

Cinderella: FLY, BIRDS

BACK TO THE SKY,

BACK TO THE EAVES

AND THE LEAVES

AND THE FIELDS

AND THE-

::Moonbay and Fiona enter, dressed for the ball::

Florinda: HURRY UP AND DO MY HAIR, CINDERELLA! ::Looks at Moonbay as Lilli fusses with her hair::

ARE YOU REALLY WEARING THAT?

Lucinda: ::Plucks at her sleeve:: HERE, I FOUND A LITTLE TEAR, CINDERELLA! ::Eyes Fiona's hair::

CAN'T YOU HIDE IT WITH A HAT?

Cinderella: YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.

Florinda: I know.

Lucinda: She means me.

Florinda: Put it in a twist.

Lucinda: Who will be there?

Cinderella: ::To herself as Fiona and Moonbay chatter underneath::

MOTHER SAID BE GOOD,

FATHER SAID BE NICE,

THAT WAS ALWAYS THEIR ADVICE.

SO BE NICE, CINDERELLA,

GOOD, CINDERELLA,

NICE GOOD GOOD NICE-

Florinda: Tighter!

Cinderella: ::Glares:: WHAT'S THE GOOD OF BEING GOOD

IF EVERYONE IS BLIND

ALWAYS LEAVING YOU BEHIND?

NEVER MIND, CINDERELLA

KIND CINDERELLA-

::Accenting each word with a twist of hair, twisting tighter and tighter with each word::

NICE GOOD NICE KIND GOOD NICE-

Florinda: Not that tight!

Cinderella: ::Grins evilly:: Sorry.

Florinda: Clod.

Lucinda: Hee hee hee- ::Fiona looks at her:: Hee hee- ::Lilli glares, she stops

Sharpsnout: Because the Baker had lost his mother and father in a baking accident, well, at least that's what he believed—

Clear Shadow: No seriously, what constitutes a baking accident? Getting run over by giant doughnuts? Some burglar stabbing you with stale bread?

Sharpsnout: Shut up.

Clear Shadow: No but seriously.

Sharpsnout, Yume Tenshi: SHUT UP NOW!!!

Clear Shadow: ::puts hands up in surrender:: Ok, ok, ok.

Sharpsnout: Anyway, he was eager to have a family of his own, and was concerned that all efforts until now had failed.

Baker: ::Clasps Chiyumi's hands:: Will you bear my child?

Baker's Wife: No.

Baker: ::clasps Clear Shadow's hands:: Will you bear my child?

Clear Shadow: …. ::thinking:: …..Ok.

Baker's Wife: ::hits Clear Shadow and Miroku with rolling pin:: That's not funny!!!

Clear Shadow: Well you said no!!!

Baker's Wife: That's the joke! I say no so he goes to you, you say no so he goes to Yume. Get it?? "All efforts until now had failed" It's funny!!!

Clear Shadow: ::rubbing head:: Owie…

::Knock on Miroku's door::

Baker: Who might that be? ::looking out the window:: It's the bi—I mean the witch from next door!

Baker's Wife: ::Hits him again:: Don't call her that!!

Baker: Clear Shadow told me to!

Clear Shadow: I most certainly did not! Just because you saw Bryan doing it during practice doesn't mean you get to do it here!!

::After receiving a death glare from Clear Shadow, Miroku opens the door and Rina enters. Then hits him with her staff::

Witch: Don't think I didn't hear that you little creep.

Baker: Will you bear my child?

Baker's Wife: The joke's over Chibi-Monk-Kun.

Baker, Baker's Wife: We have no bread.

Baker's Wife: The little Hibiki girl ate just about everything.

Witch: Of course you have no bread!

Baker: What do you wish?

Witch: It's not what I wish. It's what you wish. ::Pats Chiyumi's stomach, Chiyumi swipes at her:: Nothing cooking in there now, is there?

MereMew: The old—

Witch: I'm not old!! I'm 16!!

MereMew: And your name is Dennis right?

Witch: Huh?

MereMew: Forget it. I know you're 16 but the witch in the play is old. See? Anyway, the old-young enchantress told the couple that she had placed a spell on their house.

Witch: That's better. Thank you.

Baker: What spell?

Witch: In the past, when you were no more than a babe, your father brought his young wife and you to this cottage. They were a handsome couple, but not handsome neighbors. You see, your mother was with child and had developed an unusual appetite. She took one look at my beautiful garden and told your father what she wanted more than anything in the world was…

GREENS, GREENS, AND NOTHING BUT GREENS,

PARSLEY, PEPPERS, CABBAGES AND CELERY

ASPARAGUS AND WATERCRESS AND

FIDDLEFERNS AND LETTUCE—

::Goes into "Rap" mode::

HE SAID, "ALL RIGHT"

BUT IT WASN'T, QUITE,

'CAUSE I CAUGHT IN THE AUTUMN

IN MY GARDEN ONE NIGHT

HE WAS ROBBING ME, RAPING ME—

Baker: Yep that sounds like father. Pretty girl, dark night—

Witch: Not that kind of raping!! Where was I?

Baker's Wife: Being raped.

Witch: Not that kind of- oh forget it.

ROOTING THROUGH MY RUTABAGA,

RAIDING MY ARUGULA AND RIPPING UP THE RAMPION

(MY CHAMPION MY FAVORITE)

I SHOULD HAVE LAID A SPELL ON HIM

RIGHT THERE!

::Waves hand for emphasis and a loaf of bread flies by::

COULD HAVE TURNED HIM INTO STONE

OR A DOG OR A CHAIR…

::Giggles::

BUT I LET HIM HAVE THE RAMPION—

I'D LOTS TO SPARE,

IN RETURN HOW EVER

I SAID "FAIR IS FAIR:

YOU CAN LET ME HAVE THE BABY

THAT YOUR WIFE WILL BEAR.

::two beats::

AND WE'LL CALL IT SQUARE."

Baker: I had a brother?

Witch: No, but you had a sister.

Baker: Will she bear—

Everyone present: ::hits him with random stuff:: That's disgusting!!!!

Baker: I was kidding!

Clear Shadow: But the Witch refused to tell him any more of his sister. Not even that her name was Rapunzel.

Witch: I thought I had been more than reasonable. But how was I to know what your father had also hidden in his pocket?

Baker's Wife: Yes, you were quite reasonable.

Witch: Thanks. I thought so.

::Ahem!::

Baker: What?

Witch: Beans.

Baker, Baker's Wife: Beans?

Witch: The special beans! ::getting excited::

I LET HIM GO

I DIDN'T KNOW

HE'D STOLEN MY BEANS!

I WAS WATCHING HIM CRAWL

BACK OVER THE WALL

AND THEN BANG! CRASH!

AND THE LIGHTNING FLASH!

AND—WELL, THAT'S ANOTHER STORY

NEVERMIND—

ANYWAY, AT LAST

THE BIG DAY CAME

AND I MADE MY CLAIM

"OH DON'T TAKE AWAY THE BABY,"

THEY SHRIEKED AND SCREECHED

BUT I DID! AND I HID HER

WHERE SHE'LL NEVER BE REACHED.

AND YOUR FATHER CRIED

AND YOUR MOTHER DIED

WHEN FOR EXTRA MEASURE—

I ADMIT IT WAS A PLEASURE—

I SAID "SORRY:

I'M STILL NOT MOLLIFIED."

AND I LAID A LITTLE SPELL ON THEM—

YOU TWO SON!

::Waves her hand and a rolling pin flies over and knocks Miroku in the crotch, Miroku doubles over in pain, Chiyumi doubles over in laughter::

That your family tree would always be a barren one…

::bursts in to laughter then calms::

SO THERE'S NO MORE FUSS

AND THERE'S NO MORE SCENES

AND MY GARDEN THRIVES

YOU SHOULD SEE MY NECTARINES!

BUT I'M TELLING YOU THE SAME

I TELL KINGS AND QUEENS

DON'T EVER NEVER EVER

MESS AROUND WITH MY GREENS

::Two beats::

ESPECIALLY THE BEANS!

::Music continues. Kenshin is ready to leave the house::

Jack's Mother: Now you listen. Lead Yahiko-White to market, and fetch the best price you can. Take no less than five pounds…Are you listening to me?

Jack: Yes. No more than five pounds.

::Karou whacks him with her bokken::

Jack: ::oro face:: Oro?

Jack's Mother: Less than five!!

Jack: Ooooorooooo……

Jack's Mother: JACK, JACK, JACK,

HEAD IN A SACK,

THE HOUSE IS GETTING COLDER,

THIS IS NOT A TIME FOR DREAMING.

CHIMNEYSTACK

STARTING TO CRACK,

THE MICE ARE GETTING BOLDER

THE FLOOR'S GONE SLACK

YOUR MOTHER'S GETTING OLDER,

YOUR FATHER'S NOT BACK,

AND YOU CAN'T JUST SIT HERE DREAMING PRETTY DREAMS.

TO WISH AND WAIT

FROM DAY TO DAY

WILL NEVER KEEP

THE WOLVES AWAY.

SO INTO THE WOODS,

THE TIME IS NOW.

WE HAVE TO LIVE,

I DON'T CARE HOW.

INTO THE WOODS

TO SELL THE COW,

YOU MUST BEGIN THE JOURNEY.

STRAIGHT THROUGH THE WOODS

AND DON'T DELAY-

WE HAVE TO FACE

THE MARKETPLACE.

INTO THE WOODS TO JOURNEY'S END-

Jack: INTO THE WOODS TO SELL A FRIEND-

Jack's Mother: Someday, you'll have a real pet, Jack.

Jack: A piggy?

::P-Chan runs by much to the delight of Yume Tenshi::

Jack's Mother: ::groans, shoves him out the door:: Now go!!

Yume Tenshi: Then the witch, for purposes of her own, explained how the Baker might lift the spell:

Witch: YOU WISH TO HAVE

THE CURSE REVERSED?

I'LL NEED A CERTAIN POTION FIRST.

GO TO THE WOOD AND BRING ME BACK

ONE: THE COW AS WHITE AS MILK

TWO: THE CAPE AS RED AS BLOOD

THREE: THE HAIR AS YELLOW AS CORN

FOUR: THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS GOLD

BRING ME THESE

BEFORE THE CHIME

OF MIDNIGHT

IN THREE DAY'S TIME

AND YOU SHALL HAVE

I GUARANTEE,

A CHILD AS PERFECT

AS CHILD CAN BE.

::Miroku does a happy dance of the ferrets::

Go to the woods! ::Waves hand again, this time a frying pan nails Miroku in the head, Rina snickers then exits::

Stepmother: Ladies! ::Fanfare:: Our carriage awaits.

Cinderella: PLEASE MAY I GO TO THE FESTIVAL?

Stepmother: The festival!

DARLING, THOSE NAILS!

DARLING, THOSE CLOTHES!

LENTILS ARE ONE THING BUT

DARLING, WITH THOSE,

YOU'D MAKE US THE FOOLS OF THE FESTIVAL

AND MORTIFY THE PRINCE!

Cinderella's Father: The carriage is waiting!

Stepmother: We must be gone!

Cinderella: Goodnight father.

Cinderella's Father: ::groans drunkenly and leaves::

Cinderella: I WISH… ::sits and cries:: I what? ::You cry.:: Oh no, no way. ::Please? Just a little sniffle?:: Oh fine. ::Sits and cries::

Baker: Look what I found in Father's urn!

Baker's Wife: You went digging around in his ashes?

Baker: We'll he didn't really have any remains as he got sucked in to the mystic wind tunnel ::Has that oh-so-cute "Sad-slash-thoughtful-Miroku" face::

Baker's wife: So what was in the urn?

Baker: Nothing. Except…

Baker's Wife: Six beans?

Baker: I wonder if they are the…

Baker's Wife: Witch's beans? We'll take them with us.

Baker: No, you are not coming.

Baker's Wife: I know you are fearful of the woods at night.

Baker: THE SPELL IS ON MY HOUSE.

ONLY I CAN LIFT THE SPELL,

THE SPELL IS ON MY HOUSE.

Baker's Wife: ::overlapping:: NO, NO, THE SPELL IS ON OUR HOUSE.

WE MUST LIFT THE SPELL TOGETHER,

THE SPELL IS ON OUR HOUSE.

Baker: No! You are not to come and that is final. Now what am I to return with?

Baker's Wife: ::annoyed:: You don't remember? Moron.

THE COW AS WHITE AS MILK,

THE CAPE AS RED AS BLOOD,

THE HAIR AS YELLOW AS CORN,

THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS GOLD…

Baker: ::Memorizing:: THE COW AS WHITE AS MILK

THE CAPE AS RED AS BLOOD

THE HAIR AS YELLOW AS CORN

THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS GOLD…

Sharpsnout: ::As Miroku keeps repeating:: And so the Baker, reluctantly, set off to meet the enchantress' demand. As for Cinderella:

Cinderella: I STILL WISH TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL,

BUT HOW AM I EVER TO GET TO THE FESTIVAL?

Baker: ::Simultaneously muttering as he's getting ready:: THE COW AS WHITE AS MILK,

THE CAPE AS RED AS BLOOD,

THE HAIR AS YELLOW AS CORN—

Baker's Wife: ::Prompting:: The slipper?

Baker: THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS GOLD.

Cinderella: ::Overlapping:: I KNOW!

I'LL VISIT MOTHER'S GRAVE

THE GRAVE AT THE HAZEL TREE

AND TELL I JUST WANT TO

GO TO THE KING'S FESTIVAL.

Baker: THE COW, THE CAPE,

THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS GOLD—

Baker's Wife: THE HAIR! Idiot…

Baker, Cinderella: INTO THE WOODS,

IT'S TIME TO GO,

IT MAY BE ALL

IN VAIN, YOU/I KNOW.

INTO THE WOODS-

BUT EVEN SO,

I HAVE TO TAKE THE JOURNEY.

Baker, Cinderella, Baker's Wife: INTO THE WOODS,

THE PATH IS STRAIGHT,

YOU (I) KNOW IT WELL,

BUT WHO CAN TELL-?

Baker, Baker's Wife: INTO THE WOODS TO LIFT THE SPELL-

Cinderella: INTO THE WOODS TO VISIT MOTHER-

Baker's Wife: INTO THE WOODS TO FETCH THE THINGS-

Baker: TO MAKE THE POTION-

Cinderella: TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL-

Baker, Baker's Wife, Cinderella, Jack, Jack's Mother: INTO THE WOODS

WITHOUT REGRET

THE CHOICE IS MADE

THE TASK IS SET

INTO THE WOODS

BUT NOT FORGETTING

WHY I'M ON THE JOURNEY

INTO THE WOODS

TO GET MY WISH

I DON'T CARE HOW

THE TIME IS NOW

Jack's Mother: INTO THE WOODS TO SELL THE FREELOADER—

Jack: INTO THE WOODS TO GET THE MONEY—

Baker's wife: INTO THE WOODS TO LIFT THE SPELL—

Baker: TO LIFT THE POTION—

Cinderella: TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL—

Little Red Ridinghood: ::Skipping by eating a cookie:: INTO THE WOODS TO GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE

INTO THE WOODS TO GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE

All: THE WAY IS CLEAR

THE LIGHT IS GOOD

I HAVE NO FEAR

NOR NO ONE SHOULD

THE WOODS ARE JUST TREES

THE TRESS ARE JUST WOOD

NO NEED TO BE AFRAID THERE

Baker, Cinderella: ::Spooked:: THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE GLADE THERE…

:: Irvine, Moonbay, Fiona, and Dr. D are seen passing by in the carriage. They make faces at everyone else::

All: INTO THE WOODS

WITHOUT DELAY,

BUT CAREFUL NOT

TO LOSE THE WAY.

INTO THE WOODS,

WHO KNOWS WHAT MAY

BE LURKING ON THE JOURNEY?

INTO THE WOODS

TO GET THE THING

THAT MAKES IT WORTH

THE JOURNEYING

INTO THE WOODS

Stepmother, Florinda, Lucinda: TO SEE THE KING—

Jack, Jack's Mother: TO SELL THE YAHIKO—

Yahiko: Hey!

Baker, Baker's Wife: TO MAKE THE POTION—

All: TO SEE

TO SELL

TO GET

TO BRING

TO MAKE

TO LIFT

TO GO TO THE FESTIVAL

INTO THE WOODS

INTO THE WOODS

INTO THE WOODS

THEN OUT OF THE WOODS

AND HOME BEFORE DARK!

END OF SCENE ONE