Henry sighed as he pushed the key he held in his hand in the key hole, successfully unlocking the door that led to the apartment he shared with his boyfriend.
The mochi was a bit surprised to see the door was locked at first, because, usually, the man he loved was already home, being a lazy ass on the couch while waiting for him to return.
Quickly, the canadian opened the door, entering his home, sweet home.
Normally, the excited fishy would have jumped to his fett and ran to welcome Henry with a warm hug and, to the youngest's pleasure, a soft kiss.
But today didn't seem to be a normal day, for Donghae wasn't even there in the first place.
The violonist then took off his shoes and his coat, walking further into the deserted flat.
He never had noticed how the place he loved to call home could be so empty and lifeless without his boyfriend there to lighten up the mood. But now, the feeling of stillness in this place was crushing him and his heart, making him unconsciously wander in the house to ease the uneasiness he felt. In the end, his feet led him to a room he knew too well - as all the other rooms, since he lived there.
He pushed the door open, a sweet scent invading his nostrils. For some reasons he didn't know, their bedroom always smelled like Donghae; a sweet yet spicy perfume that Henry could have recognized between billions of other scents.
The young man walked into the room, caressing the bed with a soft and loving gaze when he recalled everything that happened under these covers, a pink blush tinting his puffy cheeks.
Unknowingly, a smile made its way to the mochi's lips. He didn't really know why those made him feel like this - probably just because it was about Donghae and him -, but it made his heart pump faster and butterflies appear in his stomach. And this felt just great.
The violonist giggled at his own self when he realized how lame and overly romantic his thoughts were, then walked out of the room without closing the door behind him, feeling his mood already less dark.
Once back in the hallway, before he even got the chance to decide how he would keep himself busy for the time Donghae would return, something caught his eye.
Henry lazily walked to the room with the opened door, curious about why it was open, since Donghae and him usually made sure to close it so the tons of clothes in there don't get all the odors of the house. Because yes, in fact, this room was used as a giant closet to store all the clothes the two of them had.
The boy first passed his head past the door frame, getting a small look at half of the room. Then he walked in to see better.
He looked around eith big eyes; he would forever be amazed at how much clothes only two celebrities could gather together.
Four racks full of articles of clothing stood in the room... Huh... Four? More like three and a half now.
The mochi blinked once, then twice, frowning a little. He was a hundred percent sure that this now half-empty rack used to be totally full! So where did the all the stuff go?
His eyes widdened in fear and a small gasp escaped his full lips as the scariest thought he ever had crossed his mind: did a fangirl find a way to get in here and take away the two singer's things?
And if she fid, was she still in the apartment? Waiting for an opportunity to kidnap the young violin prodigy?
A shiver ran down said boy's spine and whole body, his mind already imagining the worst scenarios it could come up with.
Being slightly paranoid by nature, Henry had to resist the urge to run out of the room and out of the whole apartment building. Instead, he froze on the spot, standing alone in the room.
Suddenly, a loud noise was heard and it literally made the mochi jump out of his skin, a hand flying to his chest to cling at his shirt - he really had feared that his heart would have flinched.
"Who is there?" he yelped in an unusual high-pitched voice, turning to face the door in a violent jerk, which almost made him kiss the floor as he tripped. However, he succeeded at staying up and not down like he had feared seconds ago.
The young man stayed still for a minute, listening carefully and waiting for an answer to his previous answer, all his body tensed and alert, ready to jump by the window if necessary.
His heart was erratically knocking against the insides of his chest, the stress making a small pant escape his lips even with the lack of physical activity.
He waited some more, but soon felt like the pressure bottled up in himm would make him faint, explode or something like that, for Henry never was someone who could handle stress of any kind very well.
So, since a stressed out person is said to die earlier than a person who doesn't have to cope with this negative feeling and that the mochi did not want to live a short life, he forced his feet to obey him and he walked towards the exit of the room.
During his journey down the hallway, he looked around for something he could use as a weapon, but saw nothing. And tell me how much chance to win a fist-fight has a hamster? That's right, not much at all. Even against a fangirl - because those girls can be able of crazy things to get what they want.
The violonist walked down the hallway quietly, trying to mute his steps, trying not to make the floor creak under his weight or trip, which would reveal his position... Something that isn't great at all in this kind of situation. Plus, if he stayed undercover, he would have the advantage to surprise the intruder and, maybe, have a small chance to overpower this mysterious person.
Holding his breath, Henry took one last careful step before reaching the end of the hallway, waiting behind the last bit of the wall still hiding him from the person's gaze, who was probably standing in the living room now.
He let out a shaky but subtle breath, then taking snother deep one; the last before his assault.
At lightning's speed, the young man jumped out from his hiding spot with a determined look on his features, ready to confront anyone standing there like a fearless assassin - or like a hamster getting ready to mercilessly eat its sunflower seed.
However, who he found sitting on the ground, sorting out some DVDs, totally caught him off guard, even making him back off in his swing, then trip over his own foot and stupidly fall on his butt. "H-Hae?" he yelped, gawking at his boyfriend who only looked up for two seconds at the most before going back to his previous activity.
Henry stayed there, sitting on the ground, trying but mostly failing to gather his thoughts. He let out a deep sigh, all the worries and stress leaving his body and mind with the breath on his lips. The physical indications of his futile panic from earlier also disappeared slowly, his heartbeat slowing down back to normal and his breathing regulating.
"You scared me, you know?" said the younger man with a short laugh, his puffy yet cute features illuminated by a smile.
His interlocutor's face wasn't shining with the same expression, though. Wether he was deeply concentrated on his task to sort out some DVDs, wether something was wrong.
The violonist opted for the second option, because normally, Donghae always gets distracted so easily, even when it's something really important. So the younger boy thought it was weird for his lover to ignore him like that.
"Is everything alright, Donghae?" asked the mochi on a more serious tone, shifting on the ground to kneel and then crawl to get himself closer to the other man.
His approach could have worked if the eldest hadn't suddenly took the pile of DVDs in his hands and stood up to go put them somewhere else just at the exact moment Henry was going to place his hand on his shoulder to bring him back to reality.
"Did I do something wrong..?" wondered the youngest, slowly standing up, passing his hands over his knees to sweep the dust off his jeans.
And seeing yet again his favourite dance not answer his simple question did like something was poking at his heart. Hard. And it hurt.
The hamster watched Donghae walk out of the living room and into the kitchen, coming back seconds later with a plastic bag and then shoving the pile of DVDs in it. Why for? That, the violin prodigy didn't know.
The eldest walked throught the room without even throwing a glance at his young boyfriend, heading towards the entrance of their home, where a suitcase was standing straight and almost proudly. What was it doing there anyway?
Henry stood in the middle of the room, trying to proceed what was happening without any success. His brain always was slightly slow when it was about analyzing situations, but this time, it seemed like it wouldn't even cooperate the slightiest bit.
So he watched, imobile and oblivious, as his hyung grabbed the handle of the seemingly totally full suitcase, heaved it and continued his silent walk to the door. He only put it down for a second to be able to open the door, his other hand holding the plastic bag full of DVDs.
"Donghae?" breathed out the youngest, the name leaving his lips as a desperate last try to get his boyfriend listening or at least looking at him.
The violonist's heart jumped in his chest when he saw the other man's back muscles flex to make him look above his shoulder, only twisting his waist slightly so he could get a good look at the male who had called his name.
However, what Henry saw on his hyung's face wasn't what he had hoped to see; his eyes were empty of any emotion, the only thing present in them being shadows darkening his usually full of life orbs.
The smaller man felt the previous poke at his heart give a sudden stab at it, every hope leaving his slim body as the pink bubble of love he was surrounded by burst in his face.
Oddly enough, as the mochi stayed frozen on the spot, his eyes stinging from holding back the tears, the corners of the eldest's mouth quirked up in a smile, its shine rivalring with the dark light held in his eyes. "Well, this is a farewell, Henry," he said with a voice matching his genuine smile, the tone he used contradicting the gravity of the situation.
It took some time for Henry to proceed those words, but even when he understood them, he found himself unable to speake his own thoughts or to even move a single finger.
He was forced to watch, imobile and pwerless, as Donghae turned back around to open the door completely, the dim light of the hallway enveloping the dancer's body. He then wrapped his long fingers around the suitcase's handle, picking it off the ground, finally taking a first step outside the apartment.
The younger man's eyes were wide in a mix of intense pain and confusion. He continued to torture himself by watching his ex-lover walk down the hall, since the older man had not bothered to close the door behind him.
The broken violonist opened his mouth to try to let out a shout, a scream, a sob or anything to cover the sound of the eldest's muted steps, but nothing passed his lips, as if he had no voice anymore.
He tried to make his legs move, but miserably failed. His body wouldn't listen to his commands and so, as Donghae pushed open the other door at the end of the seemingly endless corridor and exited the building, the mochi felt his knees go weak and, instead of trying to find something to hold on for support, he let himself fall to the ground.
Weakened by the stinging pain he felt, his body became shaky, the shaked becoming stronger and stronger until a broken sob escaped the puffy cheeked boy's lips. Then, his tremblings calmed down, only to be evacuated as hot tears full of heavy feelings streaming down the youth's face.
He couldn't care less about the fact that the door to his lonely apartment was still wide open, letting any curious person sneak a peek at the crying limps on the floor. He couldn't care less because he simply hadn't noticed, the proofs of suffering in his lifeless orbs blurring his vision.
Henry curled in feotal position on the cold floor, bringing his knees close to his chest and wrapping his arms around them in hope that the closeness would make him feel less cold or less empty. However, it only made him realize how alone and desperate he was to try to comfort himself like this.
So he sobbed louder, accidentally choking on one, resulting in a strangled cough as he inwardly struggled to take another breath in.
He succeeded.
But secretly, deep inside his guts, he wished he would have choked for good and wouldn't have breathed ever again, the darkness of after-life seeming so much less painful than living at the moment.
Endless pain.
Infinite loneliness.
No more reason to be happy, to even smile.
That's the only way he could picture his life without his favourite dancer, without Donghae. Surely the only way he would be able to live from now on. From the day his life changed ever so slightly, but yet so dramatically.
This couldn't be. It shouldn't have happened. It just didn't happen.
Right, he had dreamt of this. He had dreamt of the seering pain in his chest mixing with the piercing feeling of being abandoned. And the cold tiles of the floor under him weren't real either.
His brain was just sick and twisted, stupid enough to make its own owner feel such negative feelings that were about to destroy his small and slim body with their intensity.
Yes, it was a dream. A nightmare. And awful nightmare.
Or that's what he firmly wanted to believe...
