Written for challenge 16 at boosh_shorts on LJ, but for some reason I post everything here first.
I don't own the Boosh. You know, just in case you were under the impression that I did. I'm glad we're clear.
"Moon!" Bob Fossil calls over the intercom. "Get your ass to my office! Pronto!"
Howard looks despairingly at Vince. Vince flashes him a cheeky smile, says, "Go get 'em, tiger," and continues sweeping out the pen.
Howard puts his broom down and walks to Fossil's office, head low, eyes averted. He enters, and Fossil is petting a stapler and humming pleasantly.
"Now, now, Miss," says Fossil to the stapler, "That's what Bobby calls racial discrimination."
Howard coughs.
Fossil's head snaps up. "Oh, hello Moon—" then he stops and looks around.
"…What?" Howard asks.
"Where's Noir?"
"You didn't ask for him, sir. You just called me," Howard tells him. He sighs. He didn't become a zookeeper to put up with this nonsense.
"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?!" Fossil roars. "When I call one of you, I want BOTH of you!"
Howard's face turns red. "We're not joined at the hip, sir. Are you aware of that?"
"Shut up and get your wife in here!"
Howard returns to the pen. Vince looks expectantly at him.
"He wants you in there, too," Howard tells him.
"Why?"
In a rare moment of humor, Howard says, "Because you're my wife."
