Embargo Act of 1807
America rubbed his temples as he watched France and England fighting. Canada was trying to stay out of the way, but he ended up getting trampled by both England and France as he and America tried to stop the fighting. England spat on France as they fought for the X-Box controller.
Spain sweat dropped. He knew that giving the Louisiana Territory to France would cause uproar, but he had definitely not been expecting France to turn around and sell the territory to America. Spain was actually quite pleased by the outcome: England began to ignore him and was no longer threatening war. Though, it was obviously due to the fact that France had used the money gained in the selling of Louisiana to America to buy weapons to use against England.
Now, France and England were fighting viciously over a piece of machinery. In Canada's living room. After America smuggled the X-Box into Canada's house, hoping his own government wouldn't notice.
"That's enough you two!" America shouted
He unplugged the X-Box angrily. "Now no one can play it!"
"What about me?" Spain asked, beating Canada to the question.
America shook his head. "Nope."
Two Years Later: The Non-intercourse Act (1809)
"Why do they get to play it?" England asked, upset by the fact that Canada and Spain were competing in an X-Box skiing competition.
"Because they weren't arguing for it like you guys were. And besides, they're not you." America said with a slight smirk facing England, and then pointing to France "Or you."
"That's not fair!" France shouted
One Year Later: Macon's Bill No. 2 (1810)
"Please?" England begged, wincing slightly at the fact that he was actually begging. France wasn't too far behind in begging.
America sighed, stepping aside to allow the countries to fight over the X-Box again. However, this time, they found a multiplayer game. To this, America sighed in relief.
"You guys are such kids." America thought.
With that, both aforementioned countries sneezed.
"Gesundheit," America said with a grin.
AN: This came to me in history class when my history teacher compared America to an exasperated mother when her two children are fighting over the X-Box. The X-Box represents America's commerce, over which Britain and France were fighting during the beginning of the 1800's.
Apologies in advance for any grammatical errors I didn't catch.
