Another Day

By twistedly_disturbed

Summary: What would you do if you lost everything in just one moment. Demons haunting you every moment. This is a story of what I did and how eventually I don't fear another day.

Will have a lot of cannon part but is AU. don't know the exact pairings yet but will have femslash and slash.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, and am making no profit. The makers of glee just gave me these lovely characters and now I wanna mess with them

Santana's Pov

It's been a long month, it's flashed by with no real recognition. I went to school, I played football and I went where I was told to go afterwards. The only thing that worked in my favor was that the school didn't want to lose their top player so the group home I was placed in was close to my school. Not that I really cared much about staying in the same school, I didn't much care about anything anymore. So when I was notified that I had been placed into a home that would hopefully be keeping me for the next two and a half years till I turned eighteen and that it was in a different state, I didn't care about that either. I just stared blankly till the worker got the hint and left after telling me I'd be leaving tomorrow. I used to have a lot of friends and people I cared about but over the last month they had basically disappeared, I guess they didn't know how to deal with me after everything that happened, but that's ok, I didn't know how to deal with me either. Cleaning out my locker and packing the few things I had bothered to grab before everything was sold passed with no fan fair, one day I was there and the next I just wasn't. But that was life, or at least that was my life now.

The drive to lima ohio from new york passed in a blur, I couldn't tell you what the worker driving was droning on and on about, or what I was even thinking about. I was doing that a lot lately just getting lost in nothing, feeling nothing.

"Santana, Santana" I hear suddenly breaking me out of my daze and I couldn't help the slight jump from the suddenness of it. Looking around I realized we had stopped, I guess we were here. The house was nice enough, I'm sure if I had seen it before all this, I might have even thought it was charming. It looked to be two stories with a large porch in the front, It looked old but well cared for. Climbing out of the car, I half listen as the worker went on about the occupants of the house. It was a father and son, and I'd be their first foster kid. Grabbing my army duffle and laptop bag I followed the worker to the door. A teenager opened the door and the first thing I noticed was the guy's clothing, they were fashionable and kinda out there, not what I was expecting from a small ass town. Thinking about my own comfy jeans and white v-neck, I silently dreaded a family of snobs. But the kid seemed friendly enough if not a little nervous as he lead us into the living room.

As we reached the room, in came a man dressed in a shop shirt, jeans and a baseball cap. I felt myself relax slightly as the worker and the man now introduced as Burt shook hands.

I felt eyes upon me once again and found the rooms occupants looking at me. I guess I had missed something once again.

"This is Santana, and like I explained over the phone, this has been a difficult time for her so please don't take offense if she takes awhile to talk or she zones out. I've been her worker for a month and I've yet to even get eye contact" the worker explains and I wanted to feel irritated at the man for talking about like that or as if I wasn't standing right there but really it didn't matter, maybe these guys would just leave me alone now.

"Hi I'm Burt and this is my son Kurt, I understand that things are probably overwhelming and what not but we'll figure out a system, Our home is your home" Burt says to me after giving the man a disapproving look. I guess I'm not the only one that thought his words were rude and unnecessary. At least Burt seemed like a easy going guy, I knew that I wouldn't stay here long if he hadn't been seemed like the type to not smother me. I had nowhere else to go, and my money was all held up till I turned sixteen but I would have taken off and still will if I have to. With that thought I couldn't help thinking about when the family judge informed me I was now a ward of the state. It was the day after my parents had been killed in the car crash. I had spent the night before in the hospital and the worker came in first thing, talking about all these things I didn't understand and couldn't handle. With my parents death and my abuela refusing to have anything to do with me, I was to be placed in foster care till eighteenth birthday or till my sixteenth when I could apply to be emancipated. Normally I wouldn't have had that option but with my parents estate being what it was, I had more than enough money to look after myself.

"Santana" A voice once more pulls me from my thoughts and I'm almost surprised to notice the worker was gone and the two guys were seated on the couch watching me stand here like a weirdo.

"So we have a couple options for your room, Kurt has just moved into the basement so his old room is open or we have a really nice attic you could use" Burt says after I briefly gaze in his direction to show I was listening.

"Kurt, why don't you show Santana around and I'll order us all some pizza, do you want anything particular?" Burt suggests to his still silent son before directing the question at me.

"Just nothing weird, I guess" I reply and I'm almost amused by their startled looks. I wasn't not talking despite what my worker thought, I just didn't have anything to say to him or even most people but I was asked a question and I had an answer to this one.

"Great, a woman after my own heart, one large boring pizza for us and an overly complicated weird small pizza for kurt" Burt joked as kurt huffed a bit before standing and moving towards me with a smile.

Showing me around didn't take much time, the main floor was the kitchen, living room and a clearly unused dining room, upstairs has three bedrooms and a large bathroom. One door at the end was opened and I followed kurt up a few stairs. I knew immediately that this was where I'd pick to stay. The room was taller that I thought it would be, which was good since I was already tall for my age at 5'8" and who knew if I was done yet. The roof was slanted on both sides meeting at the top, there was wall sized windows on the front and back walls, framed by heavy beige curtains. The double bed was pushed up against the front window but with head of the bed being against the side wall, I knew it was just there because it would be out of the way but I knew I'd keep it there, laying in bed staring out the window sounded kinda nice. Besides that the room was empty.

"My dad is really good at building things so he could build you a closet and maybe a bathroom, if you wanted, ooh and I could help you decorate" Kurt say getting excited. Against my wishes, my mind flashes back to moments of helping my dad work on the house, Mom would be in the background mocking dad cause he'd just end up calling someone after he made it worse, at least when I was younger but we both got better and then she taken to calling us her little handy people. Which at fifteen I'd roll my eyes and grumble, if only I had known how much I'd miss it.

Feeling myself falling apart once again, I ruthlessly push it away and focus on the happily chattering boy. I think I just heard pink something. Heck no.

"No pink" I blurt out causing the boy to startle and turn fully to me with a slight blush.

"Sorry I get excited about this stuff" he mumbles and I see the almost fear cross his face. I knew that look, he was waiting for me to start mocking him. Even before I wouldn't have mocked him but now after everything I actually feel the need to make him feel better.

"Let's make a deal, I don't care what you like, how you act and you don't care what I like and how I act. No judgement" I offer as I walk to place my stuff on the slightly dusty bed. Turning to the still silent boy, I notice that he seemed to have a unsure look on his face. I sigh to myself, this wouldn't be easy, living with strangers, trying find a place for myself. But I had to try, my parents were gone but I wouldn't let them down. I had to find my place, even if all I wanted, if all I deserved was to be laying in a grave instead of my parents.

"Look how about I tell you some things about me that would make it easier to believe that I have nothing to judge you for and that really it could be reasons to be sent back" I lock eyes with him for the first time and I resisted the urge to just sit in the corner and retreat from everything. He seems to be thinking before he shakes his head.

"No, if this thing is going to work, we're going to have to learn to trust even just a little. No judgement and whenever you actually want to tell me those things then ok" he offers before offering me his hand. I'm kinda shocked to be honest, most teenagers were all about the gossip and he just turned some down. Heck even before I would have been all eager to learn something juicy, even if I wouldn't use it against someone. I was a different person now though and I could really get used to not having to watch myself so much around the house. Grabbing his hand in agreement, we both turn as the doorbell rings.

"Guess the foods here" He says with a small laugh.

We both head for the kitchen, as we were leaving the room, I took one last look around the huge open room. It wasn't home, but it was an ok second place.

"Hey guys" Burt greets as he grabs some food and sits at the table. Once again I feel awkward, I feel like so out of place here and all I wanted was to just go home. Don't get me wrong the two were nice and all but I justed wanted my house, I wanted my parents standing around joking and laughing as they all sat down to eat. I brought out of my thoughts as Kurt hands me a plate before taking his own to the table. Grabbing a piece, I head to the table.

" so did you pick what room you wanted?" Burt asks after a few seconds. Placing my slice back down as my stomach churns uncomfortably

"Yeah, I'd like the attic, if that's ok" I answer Burt just nods happily

" sounds great, I have this weekend so we can fix it up, build a closet, get some furniture. We kept it empty since kurt used to use it for his singing since with the door closed it's almost soundproof" Burt stats not noticing Kurt tensing slightly. Guess he's gotten slack for singing too, but I don't say anything, who cared if the boy liked singing.

"I have an idea for the space if thats ok" I say hesitantly but I speak up since I've never been very good at keeping my thoughts to myself.

"Perfect!" Burt says happily.

The rest of dinner passes quickly as Burt and Kurt chat, they try to include me at first but I guess they noticed my desire to just sit here silently. I force one more bit of my food but I just wasn't hungry or in the mood.

"So I guess it's time for the rule talk" Burt says after everything was cleaned up. I tense slightly knowing this was coming but how was this fair, everything was changing, fifteen years knowing what was expected of me and now I have to get used to everything again.

Burt is looking at me with sympathy but determination. And suddenly I'm angry, I've had enough of people looking at me like that. But I just push it down, ignoring it simmering just underneath.

"I know that you're not a child and after everything things are bound to get rough more than once" He starts and I shoot my gaze back to him startled, I was waiting for a list of rules not this. He just chuckles slightly.

"My rules are very simple, be a decent person like honesty, respect, take care of your responsibilities, no drugs, make curfew, and do well in school." He finishes and I'm once again shocked. I've lived by those rules all my life and would continue to do so even if I was on my own. Absent mindedly I grab the dog ties around my neck.

"I can do that" I respond letting go of my dog tags before facing the two smiling guys.

"Perfect, Kurt will you give us a moment please" Burt asks making tense once again, what now.

"Yeah, I'm just going to head to my room for the rest of the night, need to do some homework anyways" Kurt replies before flashing me a smile and leaving. It quiet for a few moments and I feel the haze start to cloud my mind again. Today has been to much, everything has been to much. But before I can retreat to far Burt clears his throat.

" I have a request Santana, I'd like you to see a psychologist" He starts and just like that the anger is back

"I'm not crazy" I snap before I can stop myself. Burt just leans back and looks at me. As the silence becomes longer, I start to count in my head. Anger has always been a problem for me, apparently I get it from my Mami but she taught me tricks when I was younger. So I counted trying to get control.

"I never meant to imply you were, I can't stop you if you want to sit there each time and glare at the doctor, I hope you won't but I can't stop you. I want you to have a safe place to talk to someone. After everything that's the least thing you deserve" Burt states finally and just like that all my anger is gone. Deserve no, I deserved the worst this world had to offer and if I believed in hell, I'd deserve that too. But I'm tired, so exhausted from everything, I just need to get away.

"I don't deserve anything but I'll go" I mumble before standing up. Burt just watches me silently.

"I'd like to go to bed now" I state already moving towards the doorway.

"Good night Santana, I'll see you tomorrow" He simply states and I can feel his eyes on me till I was out of sight. Every stair I climb hits me harder than the last, not my stairs, not my home, not my life. I just wanted everything to go back, I wanted to curl up in my moms arms, I want my dad to run his hand through my hair and tell me its all ok, that this was just a horrible horrible dream. Instead I get an empty room in a stranger's home and the truth that will never happen. I killed my parents and now this is my punishment. As I move my stuff to the floor put the clean bedding on the bed that kurt had given me earlier, I can't stop the silent tears. It was my first driving lesson, we were all so excited, mom had to come to, so we all piled into the car. Mami sat behind Papa and me in the driver seat. I was doing so well they told me, so proud of me, I looked away quickly when they said this. I didn't mean to I was just so happy, it was a reflex to look at them.

I crawled into bed as images of the car coming out of nowhere hitting the right side of the car. I remember waking up against the steering wheel. I hurt everywhere and I was scared turning to my parents I tried to get them to wake up. I was yelling, trying to get free of the airbag and seat belt. They never woke, no matter what I did, they never would. Rolling onto my side I just stared out the window waiting for the sun to raise on my next day of punishment, for another day alone, another day without them.

AN: thanks for reading