Disclaimer: I don't anything from Twilight.
It's in the water baby, it's in your frequency
It's in the water baby, it's between you and me
"Post Blue" By Placebo
Bella
We have been friends since we were fourteen.
We started to date when we were seventeen.
We got married when we were twenty-two.
And we were twenty-six when Edward slept with a woman that wasn't me.
_________
It's been four months since that happened. I can remember it so clear in my head but I wish I couldn't. It was an unwanted memory and I wish it would leave. It was a stormy Wednesday night, I had just got home from the book store that I worked at and I found Edward sitting on the sofa, holding his head with his own hands.
"Hey, what's wrong?" I sat next to him. I tried to wrap my arm around him but he jumped up. I noticed he was crying which sent my heart beating so fast; I didn't know if it would ever slow down.
"I need to tell you something."
I just looked at him, not wanting to say anything because I was scared to know what it was.
"I...cheated on you last night." His words felt like knives being jammed into me. Over and over.
I remember the red mark on his face after I slapped him and told him to get the fuck away from me. I can still hear his sorry and the sound the front door made when he left and didn't come back for two weeks. I can still feel the way my heart broke, slowly and painfully. I thought breaking my arm when I was sixteen was the worst pain ever but this made it feel like a small cut. I cried until there was nothing left; then just went numb. I was broken.
I could never leave Edward. Even though I wanted to cut him out of my life, when it comes down to it I love him and I never want to be without him. He didn't want to leave either. He told every single day in those two weeks how much he loved, wanted, and needed me. I had never seen Edward beg before but I saw it fourteen times.
My family was the worse on him. My mom, Renee still calls him 'ungrateful asshole'. My dad, Charlie, is very cold to him and now, says Edward's name with a hint of hate. My brother, Emmett, still hasn't talked to Edward since he broke Edward's nose. What makes that even more worse is that Emmett and Edward were best friends. The only one that is really sweet to Edward is my step-mom, Taylor. God bless her. I found out later that she wants to hate him but since I'm still married to him and love him, she will understand and play nice.
Even though I took him back and I'm willing to love him for the rest of my life, I haven't forgiven him and he knows that. Edward hasn't tried to touch me in a loving or sexual way since then. Even though I missed how Edward would touch me, I was still bitter.
I was sitting on the sofa, reading a book when Edward came home from work. Before he cheated, I would jump up and give him a big kiss. Now I stayed on the sofa and let out a meaningless hey.
He sat down next to me as he sighed. In the corner of my eye, I could tell he was trying to talk to me but he would stop himself. What the fuck?
I sighed as I looked at him. "What's up, Edward?"
He ran his fingers through his hair then looked at me. "I...was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight. You know, dinner...maybe a movie." He sounded hopeful and nervous at the same time.
Part of me wanted to tell him no, make up some lie but for some reason, I said yes.
As I got ready, I let my mind play with an old memory. A good one...
Edward wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. He just took a shower so he was wet and smelled like his men's soap. I giggled as I rest on my hands on his chest.
"I'm hungry, Edward" I smiled "Let's hurry up and get ready."
He started to kiss my neck "Hm...I would rather stay here and enjoy making my stunning wife moan my name." I blushed. I always did when he said things like that....
"Hey, are you almost ready?" Edward's voice snapped me out of that thought. I just nodded then picked up my handbag. We didn't speak as we got into the car and drove off.
I couldn't help but to look at Edward. He looked good tonight. Yes, he was a very sexy, beautiful man but tonight is the first time in four months, I really noticed it. His hair was mess but I always loved it like that. He had a nice white dress shirt on and tight jeans. His ass jeans. After I bought those for him, I couldn't stop looking at his ass and even slapping it. It made his almost flat ass look good.
Edward pulled up at a nice French restaurant. I felt under dressed as I looked down at what I was wearing. It was a simple white sun dress. I sighed as I got out of the car. Edward met me by the passenger side door.
"You look stunning," He let his crooked smile which I loved being seen. I wanted to smile back and give him a big kiss but just looked at him "Thanks." Before I could walk away, he took my hand into his. His touch made my heart beat very fast. I hated it but I longed for it, too. "Let's go." I started to go as I held onto his hand.
To my surprise, the dinner was going good. I did my best to just have a nice time. I let my mind not think about our problems. Before we could get our food, a stunning red head came over to the table.
"Hello," she smiled "I'm going to be waiting on you both. The other waitress had to step out." I couldn't help but noticed she was looking at Edward the whole time, never looking at me. I started to get angry when I noticed he was smiling back at her. If he had never slept with another woman, I wouldn't second guess it but this made me do that. My finger tips started to tap on the table, over and over.
"She was nice." Edward commented then took a sip of his wine.
I rolled my eyes. I wasn't in my right mind, seeing another woman flirt with my husband made me crazy with anger. "I bet she would love to get into your pants tonight," I said bitterly.
Edward almost chocked on his wine "What?" His eyes were filled with confusion.
I didn't say anything, just started to drink my wine. I couldn't even eat my dinner because the second the waitress came over, she kept flirting with Edward. If I was actually playing attention, I would see that he was not flirting with her and wanted her to leave. I was just watching her with angry eyes.
"What's wrong, Bella?" Edward asked, concerned.
"Nothing...I want to go home." I rubbed my head.
"We are not finished...why don't we just finish dinner..."
"I will be in the car." I got up and left the restaurant. I knew I was acting like a child but I couldn't get pass it. I didn't trust Edward at all. I hated that so fucking much.
We didn't talk the whole way home. I could tell he was upset but I didn't dare bring it up. I hoped this would be forgotten but the second we got into the house, Edward slammed his keys down on coffee table.
"What the fuck was that?!" I jumped. "We were having a good time then you say that thing about the waitress...all down the fucking hill after that." I was almost shocked by the anger in his tone.
"I don't want to talk about it, Edward. I'm tired." I tried to walk to the bedroom but he took a hold on my arm. He wasn't hurting me but I could tell he was serious. I pulled away, giving up. "Fine! Let's talk."
"What was that back there, Bella?" His voice was calmer.
I rubbed my head "That slut was flirting with you."
"So she was hitting on me and that was worth ruining our good night out? Come on!" He threw his arms up in the air.
"Yes!" I yelled out loud "I didn't like how she was looking at you and I'm willing to bet you loved it!"
Edward's mouth dropped. He had a pained and shocked look in his eyes. "Why the fuck would I be loving it, Bella?! I wanted her to leave so I can spend more time alone with you!"
I let out a bitter laugh as I folded my arms across my chest. "Yeah, right." I hated fighting with Edward. I just wanted it to end but it was too late for that.
"Just say it, you don't trust me!"
"Of course, I don't trust you! I can never trust you again, Edward." I had tears in my eyes. I almost wished I didn't say it because I knew it would hurt him but it was the truth.
Edward stepped closer to me. He was breathing deep as his hands became fists. "Then why are you with me? If you can't trust me and never can then why are you even holding onto this?" His voice was lifeless. It scared me.
I didn't say anything, just looked at the ground. I knew the reason was because I love him but I couldn't say it. I could feel his eyes on him which put pressure on me. He almost said my name when I shouted out. "Because you are mine! You were mine the second I saw you...the second I kissed you!"
Without any warning, Edward crashed his lips into mine. After all of these months, I was finally really kissing him. It wasn't a peck on the lips or the cheek like we have shared in the past four mouths. It was a real kiss. I moved my lips with his as my fingers took a hold of his hair, pulling him closer. Edward pulled away which I let out a whimper to when he did.
"Say it again," he moaned "Please, Bella." I watched his lips as he talked. Beyond sexy...I wanted more.
"You...are mine." I moaned back. I forced my lips on Edward again.
"Fuck, I need you..." He pulled away, just to kiss me neck.
"Then take me NOW."
Edward picked me up so I could wrap my legs around his waist. Our lips never parted until he gently threw me on our bed. I got onto my knees then before he could make a move; I ripped his shirt open, buttons flying everywhere. My hands ran over his beautiful chest. He didn't waste anytime, and pulled off my dress. He groaned loudly as I ripped off my bra. His hands cupped them, gently playing. I moaned as his lips started to suck on one of my nipples.
"Edward...please..." I whimpered, I needed him now.
He pulled away from me to take off his pants and boxers. I fall backwards onto the bed. Edward fitted himself between my legs. The lust in his eyes was making me wet. He didn't give me any warning when he thrusted into me, hard. I didn't care though. I always loved it when he caught me by surprise.
We both moaned out loud after he was fully in me. The feeling was insane. He picked up the pace, never taking his eyes off of me. My finger nails started to leave marks on his back as I tried not to lose it. It was so close but too soon. I wanted it to last forever.
"So...close..." I moaned.
"Me too, baby." He went even faster as he dropped his head to kiss me. His tongue started to play with mine.
After a couple more seconds passed, I felt myself come hard. I cried out Edward's name as I throw my head back. I felt pure ecstasy run through my body as I tried to catch my breath. Edward lost it soon after mine. He was always beautiful when he came...
Edward fell down on the bed then pulled me into his arms. It didn't take long for me to remember why this had never happened in the four months. I was about to move away from him but he started to say something.
"I love you so much, Bella."
I didn't say anything, just closed my eyes.
A/N - I hope you all enjoyed this. Please do leave reviews because it will make me write faster...Just trust me.
