Author's Notes: This story is a follow up to 'Divergences' by Whoa Nellie. It can be read alone, but it would be much better if you read 'Divergences' first (.com). Many and deep thanks to Whoa Nellie for letting me use her story as a jumping off point and for reviewing this one. The help has been invaluable.
This story accepts all TNG canon through the movie "Insurrection" while adding Vash (from the TNG episodes 'Captain's Holiday' and 'Qpid') onboard as the ship's chief archaeologist and a post 'Endgame' Chakotay onboard the Enterprise as ship's anthropologist.
This story takes place during Stargate's season 10, before the episode 'Bounty'.
Disclaimer: Paramount owns all of Star Trek's marbles; Double Secret Productions owns all of Stargate's marbles. Me, I own no marbles; I just like to play with them occasionally. I don't get anything for it and I put them all back when I am done.
CONNECTIONS
Cautiously the team spread out around the Stargate, surveying the planet where they had just arrived. The 'Gate faced a large open meadow surrounded by trees, water glimmering through them to the north. A large open empty meadow. Cameron and Sam exchanged wary glances. Teal'c was already striding cautiously around the clearing, tension evident in his shoulders.
"Looks like a nice place," Vala observed, looking around brightly.
"Where's the MALP?" Sam muttered to Cameron. "It should be sitting a few feet from the 'Gate."
"No trace of it, as far as I can tell," he replied. "I don't like this."
"Me either. The original readings we got from the MALP suggest that the planet is uninhabited, but maybe we missed something."
"That ever happen before?" Cameron shot a quick look at Sam, saw her shake her head. He motioned the rest of the team over. "Anybody got any idea where the MALP is? "
"It should be right here," Daniel told him, concern furrowing his brow.
"Should be, but it ain't," Cameron replied. "Any idea where it could be? Or who could have moved it?"
"I have seen no tracks from it," replied Teal'c. "Nor have I seen any tracks from any inhabitants."
"No, the planet was supposed to be deserted," said Daniel. "Sam, is it possible that we somehow 'Gated to the wrong planet?"
"The Stargate has sent us to the wrong planet before, but generally because of a malfunction of some kind. We have no evidence that anything out of the ordinary occurred."
"So it's possible," Cameron concluded.
"Well, yes. I recommend we dial home and see if anything unusual happened as we entered the 'Gate."
"Or we could just ask one of them," Vala suggested, pointing to two figures approaching from the trees.
Instinctively, the team turned, raising weapons as they did. Silently they watched as the pair came close enough to be identified. Sam and Daniel exchanged looks as they were able to make out the man in the lead.
"Isn't that –" Daniel asked.
"Yep," Sam replied, sounding so much like Jack O'Neill that Daniel sent her an amused look. She answered with a small smile of her own.
"Who?" asked Cameron.
"Commander Chakotay," replied Sam.
"Who?" asked Vala, clearly puzzled. Daniel shot her a quick look, impatient with her interruption, but as she shrugged, he sighed and answered, "Anthropologist on a Federation Starship, in an alternate universe. We encountered him, and his commanding officer and their wives, a few years ago on P9T701, when they inadvertently activated a portal in some ruins they were exploring."
"Didn't you send them back?" Mitchell asked. "Then destroy the portal so the Goa'uld couldn't get to their universe?"
"Indeed."
"I read the report," Mitchell muttered in response to the Jaffa's raised eyebrow.
By this time, the Federation officers had crossed the open expanse and Chakotay had recognized Teal'c, Sam and Daniel. SG-1 still held their weapons ready, although relaxed, so he stopped several feet in front of them. Lieutenant Benton continued to scan them with his tricorder. "Sir, readings indentify four humans and one – something else. Not quite a Trill, but he appears to carry a symbiote."
"Jaffa," Chakotay supplied. "It should be in the database. Teal'c, is that really you?"
Teal'c inclined his head. "Commander Chakotay."
"And Major Carter and Daniel Jackson. How did you get here?"
"Lieutenant Colonel Carter now," Sam replied. "We came through the Stargate," she continued, indicating the now inactive 'Gate behind them. "How did you get here? And where is here?"
"Congratulations. This is Kappa Seven, once home to a thriving culture, now uninhabited. Our ship is in orbit; we beamed down to explore the ruins. Colonel O'Neill is not with you?"
"General O'Neill is head of Homeworld Security in Washington DC now," Sam told him, a slight emphasis on O'Neill's rank. "This is Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell and Vala Mal Doran. Since we're both here, I think it's safe to assume that this is an alternate universe for one of us. Can you check the quantum signatures?"
Chakotay nodded and set his tricorder to scan both groups, gesturing for Benton to do the same. Scan complete, he looked at Benton for results.
"I have normal quantum signatures for us and the planet, sir," Benton answered.
"So do I," Chakotay confirmed. "Looks like you are far from home, Colonel."
"So, no dialing the SGC to see what happened," Cameron said.
"Solar flares, unusual radiation, strange, unexplained energy surges?" asked Vala, ignoring Daniel's glare.
"Nothing. I didn't detect anything out of the ordinary either before we left or once we came through the Stargate," Sam told them as Chakotay shook his head. "Until we figure out how this happened, I don't know how to get us home."
"Did anyone besides you five come through the Stargate?" Chakotay asked, eyeing the structure behind them with obvious curiosity.
"No," Daniel replied for SG-1.
Much as I would very much like a closer look at this," Chakotay gestured to the Stargate in the background, "I think we'd better see if we can figure out how you got here."
SG-1 exchanged looks, then Cameron nodded. Chakotay tapped his communicator and requested, "Chakotay to Picard. Sir, we've run into some old friends. I think you had better join us on the planet."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jean-Luc Picard didn't know why Chakotay had requested his presence on the planet, but trusted that his Chief Anthropologist and friend had a good reason. As soon as he saw who accompanied Chakotay, he understood. He stepped forward to greet SG-1.
"Major Carter, Dr. Jackson, Teal'c, this is a surprise."
"Thank you, Captain," Sam replied. "It's Lieutenant Colonel now. This is Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell and Vala Mal Doran, the newest members of SG-1."
"Jean-Luc Picard, Captain of the Federation Starship Enterprise," Picard introduced himself to Mitchell and Vala.
"Captain?" Vala muttered to Daniel.
"Naval," Daniel replied. Vala nodded in understanding and turned her attention back to Picard in time to hear him suggest that they move to the base camp Chakotay and Benton had established a short distance away. Sam looked at Cameron before nodding assent and following Benton.
"How's Beverly?" Sam asked as Chakotay fell into step beside her.
"She's doing great," Chakotay replied with a smile. "Tucked up in Med Lab researching some virus we came in contact with a few weeks ago."
"And Vash?"
"Vash is well. She's been busy recently, too."
"Vash is always busy with something," Picard added, joining their conversation. "I wanted to ask you about Colonel O'Neill. He is no longer with SG-1?"
"No, he was promoted to General and is stationed in Washington DC as head of Homeworld Security."
Picard nodded. "I imagine that was quite a change for him."
"It did take a bit of getting used to," Sam agreed. The conversation remained general for the few minutes that it took them to reach the Federation camp.
"Colonel Carter, can you tell me how you ended up on a planet in our universe this time?" Picard asked curiously once they were all seated at a long table that had obviously been used primarily for cataloging soil and plant samples collected on Kappa Seven.
"No, sir, I can't. We dialed P6M376, a planet in our own galaxy. When we came through the Stargate, we noticed the MALP wasn't there. We were getting ready to dial home when we saw Commander Chakotay and Lieutenant Benton approaching across the clearing. As far as we know, nothing unusual occurred before or during our trip through the 'Gate."
Picard nodded and looked at Chakotay.
"Benton and I were on our way to check out some anomalous energy readings when the tricorders picked up life signs. We went to check them out and found SG-1, along with a Stargate."
"A Stargate?"
"Yes, sir."
"In this universe, the Goa'uld lost the battle with the Lemurians, so there are no Stargates here," Daniel leaned forward to rest his elbows on the table. "So there shouldn't have been a Stargate on the planet."
"Obviously there was," Cameron pointed out. "Are you sure there have never been Goa'ulds here, in this reality?"
"'Slimy, evil, scum-sucking, bottom-feeding snakeheads?'" Picard smiled slightly. "No. Vash researched all the databases she could access when we returned from Tama. There is no mention of any race that matches the Goa'uld."
"All right then," Vala said brightly, looking around the table. "How do we get back home?"
Until then, Picard had not really looked at the second female member of SG-1. Now he took the time to discreetly study her. Vala's dark hair was caught in two disheveled ponytails on each side of her face and her bright blue eyes moved from face to face as she studied each person around the table.
"Well?" Vala asked, still looking from face to face, now slightly impatient.
"What exactly is a MALP?" Chakotay asked, momentarily avoiding her question.
"Mobile Analytic Laboratory Probe," Sam replied. "Basically it's a computerized device that we send through the Stargate to analyze atmospheric conditions, life signs, and terrain before a team goes through. We also use it to send video feed back and forth between the team and the SGC."
"And you sent a MALP to Kappa Seven?"
"We sent a MALP to P6M376," Sam corrected. "We checked the readings right before we came through the 'Gate. I think that the MALP really is on P6M376, in our reality. Somehow when we stepped through the 'Gate, we were transported here to Kappa Seven in your reality instead of to P6M376 in our reality."
"So how are we going to get home?" Vala repeated, the beginnings of frustration evident in her voice.
Sam shook her head. "Until I figure out how we got here, I have no idea where to even start to figure out how to get home. Commander Chakotay, are there any other portals on the planet?"
"Not that we know of. I'll ask the Enterprise to scan the planet. It's possible we just haven't discovered one yet." Tapping his communicator, Chakotay contacted Data and relayed the request.
There was a brief bright flash of light and a new voice saying condescendingly, "Oh, don't bother Mr. Data. I'm sure he has much better things to do than scan for a non-existent portal."
At the end of the table, there now lounged a dark haired man in the uniform of a Starfleet Admiral, his mouth twisted in an arrogant smirk. SG-1 regarded him warily, the Starfleet officers resignedly.
"Q," sighed Picard. "I should have guessed you were involved."
"Oh, please," Q rolled his eyes exaggeratedly. "It wasn't my idea, Jean-Luc. You humans are enough trouble on your own without importing others from an alternate universe." He waved a dismissive hand at SG-1 before continuing, "No, Q just had to take up with the Ferengis. Granted, their Rules of Acquisition have their uses, but I've just never quite understood his fascination with them."
"Much like your fascination with humans?" Chakotay asked.
"I find humans to be a savage child race in need of much supervision. Q actually believes that the Ferengi are quite nearly as advanced as the Continuum itself. We're hoping it's a stage he'll outgrow."
"Savage child race?" Cameron asked, deceptively calm.
"Humanity has had moments of savagery throughout our history, but we have also made some great advances" Daniel pointed out. "Diseases that once killed millions have been completely eradicated; countries that once fought bitterly are living peacefully as neighbors. We have freed the Jaffa from the Goa'uld and the Asgard from the Replicators and expanded into the Pegasus galaxy." Daniel paused to draw breath, only to have Vala chime in, "And we're going to kick the Ori's asses all the way back to their own galaxy!"
"Hardly an original defense of the species," Q drawled, "is it, Jean-Luc? And I'm sure you're quite impressed with yourselves. But that's hardly the point."
"Who are you?" Sam asked bluntly, taking advantage of a pause in Q's explanation.
Q stared at her in surprise for a brief moment. "I am Q."
"What's a Q?"she continued. "And why do you also refer to yourself as a separate entity?"
"The Q are an omnipotent, omniscient race. We have a continuum to govern ourselves and Q has broken one of the most basic of our rules."
"What rule have you broken?" Sam persisted, ignoring the snicker that Chakotay quickly turned into a cough.
"Not me, Q!" Q's voice had gradually become louder.
"You are Q," she pointed out patiently.
"We – are – all – Q!"
"Doesn't that get confusing?" asked Vala.
Q threw up his hands in frustration and turned to Jean-Luc. "And I thought you were pedantic and plodding!"
"All members of the Q Continuum are known simply as Q. While confusing for us, they seem to have no problem keeping themselves straight," Jean-Luc explained to SG-1. "Fortunately, we have not often had to deal with more than one at a time."
Q huffed in annoyance. "Yes, yes, sometime Jean-Luc will have to give you a list of all the times I've had to bail him and his precious Enterprise out of trouble over the course of our acquaintance." Q began to pace around the table, radiating impatience and superiority. "Right now, our concern is the Ferengi, not the Continuum."
"Okay, I'll bite," Cameron said. "Why are we concerned with the Ferengi?"
"You bite?" asked Vala impudently. "How interesting. Do you, Daniel?"
"It's a figure of speech," Daniel growled quietly. "It means to ask the obvious question."
"I know what it means, Daniel," Vala replied. "I'm still curious as to whether you bite, though."
Daniel chose to ignore her, turning his attention back to Picard, who was saying, "What do the Ferengi have to do with SG-1's presence in our reality?"
"Everything, mon capitaine. You may happen to remember a small incident some time ago on Tama? An interdimensional portal allowed the Ferengis to cross over to another reality."
"And we managed to get them back to this reality and closed the portal so no one can cross over again," Chakotay finished.
"Of course you did," Q said patronizingly. "But that didn't stop them from trying to find another way to exploit that alternate reality. Or any other reality they can find. The Ferengi are traders, not scientists. It's amazing they ever achieved space flight really."
"So they asked Q?" Picard guessed.
Q shot him a nasty look. "And he was very intrigued by the notion. But he wanted to learn more about your reality first, much to the dismay of the Continuum. They expressly forbid it! But Q didn't listen. He never listens."
Cameron looked at Sam. She was leaning forward, a gleam in her eye that told him that she was at least one step ahead of the rest of them. He saw that Daniel had noticed, too and was leaning back slightly, waiting to for his friend to explain it to them. He was sure that her explanation would be more practical and less rambling than the one they were getting from the so-called omnipotent being currently pacing and expanding on the reaction of the Continuum.
Sure enough, Sam leaned forward and as soon as Q paused between words, said, "It sounds like Q brought us to here to learn more about our reality, but he didn't. You brought us here to counter something that he did. Or to punish him for your Continuum. Although I get the impression that you don't get along with them all the time."
"So which is it?" Vala challenged. Daniel looked at her, surprised. He sometimes forgot that Vala had spent most of her life living by her wits alone and was not the naive follower he often thought her.
Q looked startled. Both women regarded him steadily, waiting for him to answer. The rest of SG-1 and the Starfleet officers looked at him expectantly. Teal'c leaned forward slightly.
"Q brought a ship from your reality. Traders like the Ferengi. He thought they would be better suited to work with the Ferengi to establish trade with your reality. They don't want to work with Q and the Ferengi; they want to use this reality as a place to hide while staging military raids into your reality. They're trying to force Q to send them back and forth as they require. That's why I brought you here."
"The Lucian Alliance?" guessed Teal'c.
"I believe that is what they call themselves."
"Let me get this straight," Cameron said. "The Ferengi that SG-1 encountered on P9T701 told Q about our reality and he thought it sounded like just a wonderful idea to get the two realities together to be shopping partners. The Continuum didn't like the idea but he brought over some of the fine upstanding members of the Lucian Alliance anyway, so they could see exactly what he was talking about. But the Lucian Alliance doesn't want to play his way. What I'm not clear on is why Q doesn't just send them back to our reality."
"Because the Continuum wants him to. He's not very old, for a Q. He's in his rebellious stage. He'll hold onto your Lucian Alliance until he's good and ready to let them go, which will be just a little longer than the Continuum bothers him about it. He's very stubborn."
"So the Continuum sent you to deal with him instead of doing it themselves," Jean-Luc surmised.
Q nodded. "I had to leave a very interesting nebula to deal with Q. Just because they don't want to deal with him themselves."
"Sounds like a spoiled kid himself," Vala muttered to Daniel. He hushed her quickly, hoping Q hadn't heard. He didn't think that irritating a so-called omnipotent being at the first meeting was the best course of action. Not that SG-1 hadn't done it before, but it usually created more problems than it solved.
"So what's our part in all this?" Daniel asked. "If you're as powerful as Q, why can't you send the Lucian Alliance back yourself? What do you need us for?"
"Because he doesn't want Q to know he's involved. Or the Continuum doesn't want Q to know. The element of surprise," Cameron explained.
"Exactly! This one shows some promise, Jean-Luc. Almost as much as Riker did. I wonder if he has that same fascination with sharing power with his friends?"
"I'm sure he does," Jean-Luc replied. "What do you want from SG-1? And from us?"
"They're going to stop the Lucian Alliance. You, my dear captain, can deal with the Ferengi. I will deal with Q." Q's astringent tone left little doubt as to how he would deal with the wayward omnipotent being. "But," he continued, in a suddenly lighthearted voice, "we can't do anything from here."
SG-1 blinked against another brilliant flash of light. Suddenly they found themselves in a large conference room, stars passing serenely outside the windows that occupied one wall. Looking around in bafflement, SG-1 could only conclude that they had been beamed aboard the Enterprise. They were still accompanied by Picard and Chakotay; however, Lieutenant Benton had disappeared and been replaced with Vash and Beverly, both looking disoriented. Vash was facing Q, who cringed just a little as her irritated gaze landed on him.
"Q! What is this all about? I was working," Vash lashed out at him. "Do you know how precise the timing is when you're using any kind of chemical dating agent? You've just ruined my analysis of the Timolean statuettes. Hello, Jean-Luc. So he's roped you into this too. Whatever this is."
After a quick and loving look at her husband, Vash continued to pin Q with her gaze, clearly waiting for an explanation.
"He's not the only one Q's roped in," Beverly commented, surveying the group gathered in the room.
"Oh, my," agreed Vash as she looked around as well. Introductions and explanations quickly followed, only to be interrupted by Q.
"Can we just get on with it? Why don't we just save the details for later? The Timolean statuettes are waiting after all." Q's sarcasm caused Vash to send him a disapproving look, but was otherwise ignored.
"My assistants have already taken care of the analysis of the Timolean statuettes by this time," Vash assured him breezily. "Which leaves me free to deal with you. So why have you brought Beverly and I here?"
"So you can help your darling husband and his friends deal with the Ferengi, of course."
"I thought you just missed my charming company, Q. Ferengi? Sovak's up to his ugly ears in this, isn't he?" Vash asked suspiciously.
Q nodded. "At least to his ears. Possibly in over his head."
"Sovak's always in over his head," Vash sighed.
"So where exactly are we going? I'd really like to get the Lucian Alliance out of this reality and back where they belong," Cameron suggested.
"Mr. Data will have the coordinates." Q gave Picard a mocking salute and disappeared in one of his trademark bright flashes of light.
"Is he always like that?" Cameron asked the Starfleet officers.
"Always," Chakotay replied drily. "Except when he's more arrogant, more demanding and more unreasonable."
Picard tapped his comm badge. "Mr. Data, what is our heading?"
"Sir, we were in orbit above the planet, but we are now on a heading for an adjoining solar system, comprised of seven planetary bodies and several moons. Running a diagnostic on navigation systems to see why our heading shifted without input," Data replied,
"Never mind the diagnostic; it was Q. Is that system on long range scanners yet?"
"No, sir. We should be in range in three-point-eight hours."
"Thank you. Please alert me in three hours." Picard turned to SG-1. "What can you tell me about this Lucian Alliance?"
************************************************************************
"So the Lucian Alliance is essentially a loosely knit group of mercenaries?" Riker asked. Picard had asked his first officer to join them in the conference room while SG-1 briefed them. Ambassador Worf, visiting the Enterprise between negotiations, had also joined the group. He and Teal'c, each instantly recognizing the other as a warrior, were unobtrusively sizing each other up. After mutual congratulations between Worf and SG-1 on promotions, Riker's question turned everyone's attention to the current situation.
"Pretty much," Cameron agreed. "Netan is their leader, or he was, the last we heard. There were factions who were trying to assassinate him. If this Q is offering him a whole new reality to exploit, it could be what he needs to regain control and solidify his hold as leader of the whole shootin' match."
"Especially if he can also convince Q to send him back and forth between the two realities," added Daniel. "What Q thinks are simple trading missions could be used by Netan as military raids on his opponents."
"Question?" asked Vala. At Picard's nod, she continued, "Is this Q, any of them, really omnipotent? I mean, we've seen that they have powers; at least this one did. Are they all the same?"
Picard sighed. "I don't know if any being can truly be omnipotent, but the Q certainly do have powers beyond other races we've encountered. However, if you are asking if Netan could deceive Q, any of them, into thinking he is conducting trading missions when he is in fact carrying out raids, I don't think so."
"Unless Q wanted to be deceived," Vash added. "They're not quite truly omnipotent, but if Q wanted to believe that this Netan was doing nothing but trading, he could be fooled into it. Or he may know and simply not care, as long as Netan was also trading with the Ferengi in this reality. Humans aren't the only ones that bury their heads in the sand when they don't want to deal with something. In this case, if Q wanted to defy the Continuum enough, he could just turn a blind eye to what Netan's really up to."
"How very – human of them," Worf commented.
"Indeed," replied Teal'c. The two warriors looked steadily at each other. Both Picard and Carter were wondering what conclusions each had reached about the other.
In the midst of the briefing, Picard's communicator beeped, Mr. Data alerting him that they were approaching long range sensor range, although it would be several hours yet until they reached the system itself.
Finally Picard brought the speculation to an end by saying, "Until we reach the Chesian system, I don't think there is anything any of us can add. Ambassador, would you please show SG-1 to guest quarters near yours? Beverly, please make sure we have portable medical supplies for everyone, including anything we may need to treat Ferengi, just in case. Vash, please go check on your Timolean statuettes and let Ms. Leigh know that she will be in charge of the Archaeology lab for a while. It seems Q wants you along to deal with Sovak. For now, we'll play his way."
"That's your archaeologist?" Cameron asked, eyeing Vash appreciatively before glancing at Daniel. "I don't suppose you'd want to trade?"
"Why is it always me they want to trade?" Daniel asked plaintively.
"Ah, no," Picard replied to Cameron. "I doubt she'd be very happy with either of us if we did that and an unhappy Vash can make life – quite unpleasant."
"I don't want to trade you, Daniel," Vala reassured him.
"Thanks," Daniel muttered as they followed Worf out of the conference room.
Worf opened the door to the guest quarters and allowed SG-1 to precede him into the room. As Daniel and Vala surveyed the open room with its wall of windows showing the stars flashing by outside, Worf showed Sam and Cameron how to access the replicator for food before turning to Teal'c.
"You are a warrior. Have you ever fought Ferengi?"
"No. We rescued three from the Goa'uld Klorel but had no occasion to fight them. They did not appear to be formidable opponents."
"They are not; they rely on devious tactics. Ferengi much prefer to deceive or bargain their way out instead of fighting. But if they choose to fight, their ears are very vulnerable. Would you like to join me on the holodeck to practice?"
"Holodeck?" asked Sam.
"A simulated environment. It can be used for many things, but I find it to be an excellent place to practice fighting skills."
"I'd like a look at this holodeck of yours," Cameron told him.
"So would I," agreed Sam.
Worf was still looking at Teal'c. The big Jaffa returned his steady gaze. "I welcome the opportunity."
In the end, they all joined Worf and Teal'c on the holodeck. At Worf's request, the computer provided both outdoor and shipboard situations and SG-1's training proved to be more than adequate in dealing with any Ferengi tactics the computer used against them. With help from Cameron and Teal'c, Worf was able to program scenarios featuring the Lucian Alliance into the computer. Worf was easily able to defeat them. The main purpose of the exercise quickly became a comparison and exchange of tactics between Worf and Teal'c. The two men from vastly different cultures rapidly found themselves equally matched in strength and cunning and determination but with markedly dissimilar styles. By the time Worf escorted SG-1 back to their quarters, he had adopted some of the Jaffa fighting techniques and Teal'c had mastered some of the Klingon's.
"It was a good battle," Worf said by way of thanks to SG-1, his gaze encompassing all of them but resting on Teal'c.
"It was," Teal'c agreed, tilting his head to the Klingon. With a nod, Worf stepped back and the door to SG-1's quarters slid closed.
"Well, that was some workout," Cameron said. "Even if they weren't real, every time we got hit, it hurt like it was. But it was valuable intel if it comes to fighting."
"That was a test," Vala corrected. "Nice job, Teal'c."
Teal'c nodded. "Now he knows our strengths and we his."
"I think he just wanted to test Muscles here," Vala persisted, sauntering up to the Jaffa. "You know, warrior to warrior and all that. The Ferengi aren't fighters and I'm sure he realized that our training was more than adequate. It was just a chance to see what we, and particularly you, can do."
"Perhaps," Teal'c conceded, "but it allowed us to test him as well."
"Hey, guys, check this out," Sam called. She had turned on the computer and managed to access the Enterprise's main database. Quickly she called up the entries on the Ferengi and became absorbed in them. After a few minutes, only Daniel was left reading over her shoulder. The rest of the team wandered off, knowing that Sam and Daniel would keep them informed. Vala sauntered to the replicator and ordered food for all. Quietly she slid plates of beef and vegetables in front of Daniel and Sam, the two pausing to thank her before returning their attention to the small screen on the table in front of them.
When Sam finally turned off the computer, Cameron had fallen asleep and Teal'c was in a light meditative state. Vala had pulled a chair next to Daniel and, after a few abortive attempts to get his attention, had become as absorbed in the data as he and Sam. Quietly they made their way to separate beds, knowing that they needed rest in order to be as alert as possible when they encountered the Lucian Alliance and the Ferengi, not to mention Q.
Over breakfast the next morning, Sam filled the rest of them in on what she and Daniel had learned the night before.
"I was able to access their main database, but only at the surface level. Okay, the Ferengi are totally profit driven. Their entire culture, even their religion, if you can call it that, is based on who can make the most profit from any given venture. Clearly their motivation in this is to be able to corner the market in an entirely new reality. They think they can be the only ones trading in our reality, and the profit would be enormous. That's how they fit in. It's pretty simple."
"We know the Lucian Alliance is looking at this from a more military standpoint," Cameron said, "and the same trade potential is there for them. But their main interest is going to be gaining power in our reality."
Daniel nodded. "Back home, they are trying to take advantage of the vacuum of power left when the Goa'uld were defeated. Here, they would just be one more race of traders and there's no way they can compete with the Ferengi."
"What about Q?" Cameron asked.
"There's not much information other than what Picard told us. A race of seemingly omnipotent beings that govern themselves by a Continuum. It doesn't seem like they involve themselves in the affairs of other races very often," Sam replied.
"But our Q, the one who appeared yesterday, seems to have taken a good deal of interest in the Enterprise. Or maybe in Picard himself. It's hard to say which," Vala added. "He seemed like he was needling Picard in particular."
"Yeah, he did," Daniel agreed. "But we weren't able to pull up any details about him."
Cameron looked at Sam. "Can you hack into their system?"
She looked thoughtful. "Eventually, probably. But why? These people are our allies. Plus I'm sure that if I did, it would be detected almost immediately. There's no reason to abuse their trust in us just to satisfy our curiosity."
"Besides," Daniel added, "if they were the ones trapped in our reality, we'd be careful how much information we allowed them access to."
Cameron nodded. "Just wondering."
The door chimed, interrupting the conversation. At Vala's call, the door slid open, admitting Vash and Beverly.
"Hope we're not intruding," Vash greeted them. "Jean-Luc should be calling any minute to say we're in the Chesian system. Then we can plan what we're going to do. Mind if we join you until then?"
"Of course," Sam welcomed them. Teal'c inclined his head, then with a quick look around, brought two chairs from the adjoining room and pulled them up to the table where SG-1 was gathered.
"Have you eaten?" asked Daniel.
"I could do with something to drink," Beverly said, motioning him to stay in his seat. "I'll get it. Vash?"
At Vash's nod, Beverly stepped to the replicator and returned with two steaming mugs of coffee. She seated herself and handed one to Vash, who was looking at Sam and saying, "Did you find everything you needed?"
"Quite easily, thank you."
"On the computer as well?" Vash nodded her thanks to Beverly.
"See, Cameron, I told you they would be monitoring," Vala hissed under her breath.
Vash smiled. "Actually we weren't. It's just the first thing I would do, if I were you. Look, you need all the facts you can get, about the Ferengi and about Q. I'd be disappointed if you didn't at least try. But all you're going to have access to on the computer is the most general information. On the other hand, I have had considerable dealings with the Ferengi and I spent quite a long time traveling the galaxy with Q. You've got questions; I've got answers." Vash leaned back in her chair, enjoying the looks of surprise on SG-1's faces, although Teal'c remained impassive as always.
Sam recovered almost immediately. "You traveled with Q? How did that come about?"
Before Vash could answer, her communicator chimed and Jean-Luc requested that she and Beverly join him in the same conference room they had used the previous day. Seconds later, the intercom in SG-1's quarters sounded as Picard made the same request of them. As they all got to their feet, Vash winked at Sam and said, "Later."
They found Worf and Chakotay in the conference room with Picard. Picard's eyebrows rose when he saw Vash and Beverly enter the room with SG-1 but he said nothing as they all took their seats.
"We have entered the Chesian system. Scanners show that the Lucian Alliance ship is in orbit around the fourth planet in the system, along with two Ferengi ships. We believe the planet to be uninhabited." Chakotay indicted the scanner readings on the wall screen. "Life signs indicate that there are both Ferengi and humans on each of the three ships."
"I think our primary goal should be getting the Lucian Alliance back on their own ship so that they can be sent back to our reality," Cameron suggested. "Is our omnipotent friend going to be here to take care of that or do we need to figure out how to do that on our own?"
"I'm sure Q will be able to do that," Picard assured them.
"What about the other Q?" Sam asked. "Q Two, for lack of a better way of keeping them straight."
"He's not likely to send them back just because we ask," Chakotay told her.
"No, I meant is he here? And what kind of interference will he cause? If he's here, he may wonder what's going on when we try to get all the Lucian Alliance members away from the Ferengi."
Picard shook his head. "We have no way of knowing if he's here or what he may do. From what Q told us, he will almost definitely try to prevent us from doing anything."
"Can we surprise him?" Cameron asked.
"That's very hard to do," Picard replied. "Not impossible, however."
"Perhaps a distraction," Teal'c said.
"What did you have in mind?"
"If we can keep Q Two's attention on us, the Ferengi's attention as well, a small group could board the Al'kesh and pilot it out of the area."
"Then we just have to locate the Lucian Alliance people on the Ferengi ships and grab them," Cameron added.
Chakotay nodded. "We could beam them aboard once we're in range. We would need to be able to keep the Ferengi from giving chase to get them and their ship – is it called an Al'kesh? - back. And keep Q Two from finding out what we're doing."
"What are they doing? I mean, why are they circling that planet? Is there something on the planet they want or is it just a convenient place to be?" Sam asked.
Chakotay called up the sensor scans of the planet. "It's a class M planet, uninhabited, with a single land mass surrounded by oceans. Salt water, from the looks of it."
"What's that?" Vala asked, pointing at an area on the land mass.
"What's what?" Chakotay froze the screen.
"That squarish area there."
Chakotay magnified the scan, focusing on the area she indicated. He magnified it once again, showing what was clearly a large cultivated space on the planet's surface.
"That looks like fields with a crop of something growing. If the planet is uninhabited, who's growing what?" asked Beverly.
Silence fell around the table.
"Kassa," Cameron exclaimed. "It has to be! We know the Lucian Alliance is heavily involved with kassa and if they can addict the Ferengi, Netan will have the upper hand. In this reality, not just a chance to rebuild his power base in ours."
"What is kassa?" asked Picard.
"A highly addictive psycho-stimulant," Sam replied. "Looks and tastes a lot like corn, in fact. The addiction is almost immediate. Cameron's right; Netan could use kassa to build a base of power here. He'd be set even if Q refused to send him back and forth between realities."
Beverly leaned forward. "Could it be used as food?"
"'Sweet corn heaven,'" Cameron quoted. "Genetically engineered by none other than our friends in the Lucian Alliance." Sam nodded in agreement.
Beverly caught her breath. "Jean-Luc, this could be used to contaminate food supplies and addict more than the Ferengi."
He nodded. "We'll have to also completely destroy the crop and make sure the Ferengi have none of it in any form."
"Are you sure it's kassa?" asked Chakotay.
Daniel nodded. "It's all the Lucian Alliance would have to offer. We're from different realities, but your technology, and presumably the Ferengi's, is at least equal to ours. The usual things the Alliance trades – food and technology and weapons – wouldn't be in any demand here, other than as novelties. Kassa would. Its effects are significant and immediate."
"What are those effects?" Worf inquired.
"An immediate sense of wellbeing. And invincibility. You feel good and you think you can do just about anything, People who are normally rational, competent individuals just can't face the prospect of being away from it. We've known people who disobey direct orders in order to maintain their access to kassa after even very short exposure." Cameron replied.
"The Ferengi already think they're God's gift to the universe," Vash observed.
"What happens when it wears off? Beverly asked.
"Fatigue, irritability, depression, isolation. The user focuses on getting more kassa, not on family or work or anything else," Daniel replied.
"And soon that's all they can think about, consuming more and more kassa to get the effect they want," Beverly guessed. Seeing SG-1 nod, she continued, "Is it ever fatal?"
"Not in and of itself. People will kill for it though," Daniel answered.
"Just like any other illegal drug," Beverly sighed.
Cameron leaned forward. "Do you think we can get to Netan and his people before they give any kassa to the Ferengi?"
Worf turned to the data on the screen in front of them. "We would have to move fast. They could have already addicted the Ferengi though."
The display chimed, indicating updated data. Even SG-1 could clearly tell the lifesigns were all disappearing from the ships and reappearing on the planet.
"Options, Mr. Worf?" Picard barked.
Before Worf could answer, Q reappeared with his characteristic bright flash of light. "What did they do on that planet? Didn't Q realize that Q has a long term project on this planet? What is that stuff growing there?"
Q jabbed a finger at the square of kassa on the display and glared at SG-1 as if they were somehow responsible. They quickly explained what kassa was and what its effects were. Q rounded on Picard, "What are you intending to do about this kassa?"
"That's what we were talking about when we were so rudely interrupted," Worf answered for his captain.
"You people talk too much," Q proclaimed. With a flash, the briefing room disappeared and SG-1 found themselves in another clearing on another planet. This time they were accompanied by Picard, Vash, Chakotay, Beverly and Worf. Vala looked down at herself to discover that she was outfitted with all the gear she had carried from the SGC, most of which had been left in her quarters on the Enterprise. A look at her teammates showed that they, too, had their gear with them.
"He doesn't mess around, this Q, does he?" she asked no one in particular. Chakotay snorted to himself in response as he pulled out his tricorder. He glanced at Worf, who was also taking bearings with his tricorder, his phaser in his other hand. He tilted his head slightly to the east, Chakotay nodded in agreement.
"The kassa field is this way," Worf told Picard, preparing to take point. Teal'c and Cameron moved to join him.
"Let's find out exactly what the Ferengi and the Lucian Alliance are up to without being seen. I'd hate to lose the element of surprise," Picard cautioned, looking around and making eye contact with Cameron and Sam before his gaze settled on his wife.
"Now, Jean-Luc, I know this is a Starfleet mission and totally under your command as Captain of the Enterprise. I would never do anything to interfere with that," Vash replied, smiling beguilingly at him.
"If I only believed that," Picard muttered to himself. Chakotay turned away to hide a grin.
They moved out, Worf and Teal'c in the lead. Chakotay dropped back to guard the rear of the group. Sam found herself in the middle of the group with Daniel and Vala. Picard asked Cameron about SG-1's previous encounters with the Lucian Alliance. As Cameron answered, Vash drifted back to join Sam.
"Looks like this is 'later,'" she said. "A few years ago, Q decided to do something 'nice' for Jean-Luc, repayment for something Jean-Luc had done for him, I think. I was onboard the Enterprise for an archeological conference. Q noticed the interest between us – this was before we were married, of course – and set up an elaborate Robin Hood scenario, starring our dear Captain. I was Maid Marion and the command crew was the Merry Men."
Vala chuckled, "I can't picture Worf as a 'merry man.'"
"Neither could Worf," grinned Beverly, joining them.
"Let me guess, Q was the Sheriff of Nottingham."
"Right, Daniel. Who better to goad Jean-Luc and me? Anyway, after surviving his little entertainment for us, he offered to show me around the galaxy. To take me places, and times, no human had ever been. To actually see artifacts being made and used, ceremonies that don't exist anymore. To be able to prove some of my theories, to posit new theories and prove them. To be able to publish papers and give lectures and frankly, to show some of the dotards at the Daystrom Institute that archaeology is not a dead science. Can you imagine?"
Daniel could, quite easily. "You wanted to prove yourself."
"Admittedly, I haven't always been the most upright of archaeologists. I was involved in several less than straightforward business deals. Jean-Luc stumbled into one of them on Risa; that's how we met. The next time I saw him was at this conference on the Enterprise; suddenly we're involved in Q's little game and the next thing I know, Q's offering me the galaxy. More than one of them, in fact. It was too much of a temptation, so off I go with Q, to see the universe."
"What happened?"
Vash sighed. "What didn't? We were welcomed some places, reviled in others. In a few places, we actually hid from the local peoples because of Q's previous dealings with them. There are worlds out there, a few at least, that regard him as their god. And he encourages them. Well, you've seen Q; he honestly believes that superior being stuff he spouts. I'm all for a healthy self image, but he really overdoes it. That arrogant attitude got on my nerves after a while. I told him off a few times; he'd get offended but we always worked through it."
"Until?" asked Vala.
Vash gave her a rueful smile. "Until he stormed off and left me completely on my own in the Delta Quadrant. It took me two years to work my way back here. Thanks to a lot of hard work and a little luck, I made it. Of course he showed up immediately and proceeded to screw up a perfectly good business deal on DS9."
"DS9?" questioned Sam.
"Sorry. Deep Space Nine, one of our space stations. It orbits a planet called Bajor, luckily near a stable wormhole. Which was how I finally made it back to the Alpha Quadrant."
"You can't blame me for screwing up that deal." Q's head was suddenly floating in front of Vash.
Ignoring everyone's looks of surprise, Vash scowled at him. "Who told me it was completely harmless? 'An inert, insignificant relic of an inert, insignificant planet,' if I remember right."
Q had the grace to look abashed. "I didn't think you'd just sell it to the highest bidder!"
"Of course I did – that's what you told me to do with it!" Vash swatted at the disembodied head which disappeared and promptly reappeared with a huge sigh.
"I will admit that I didn't take as good of care of you as I should. We were partners, of a sort, and I shouldn't have abandoned you for so long. I did check up on you though!" With that Q's head vanished.
"Guess that answers the question of whether or not Q's here," Daniel observed to no one in particular.
"Imagine traveling the galaxies with someone who looks adult but acts like a spoiled twelve year old. I broke our partnership once or twice, we both did, but Q was the one who broke it for good." Vash sighed. "It is nice to know he was checking on me though," she added, brightening.
"I was just afraid of having to tell Jean-Luc I had lost his precious little archaeologist," Q's voice said from the air around them. "You have no idea what he said to me the next time I saw him!"
"I'm curious," said Sam, "but you did say DS9 is near a stable wormhole? I've never heard of a stable wormhole occurring naturally."
"One of a kind, I think," Vash replied. "It has something to do with beings Bajorans call 'Prophets' and the Bajoran religion. Jean-Luc knows more about it than I do. Anyway Q and I are on more or less friendly terms these days. He comes by, needles Jean-Luc a couple times a year, throws in a few shady comments about me and all is well. In all fairness, with what I learned traveling with him, I was able to do exactly as I had hoped and prove some theories, introduce some new cultures and regain my standing with the Daystrom Institute."
"So is Q really everything he says he is?" Vala asked. "I mean, all of the Q really do have these super powers?"
Vash nodded. "I don't think they're necessarily superior to us. I think they're just further along the evolutionary path than we are. I also think we'll get there ourselves someday."
"Not quite ascended maybe," Daniel mused to himself, clearly intrigued.
Sam leaned close to him. "Alternate universe, remember? Maybe the Q are this universe's version of ascended beings."
Daniel nodded. "That makes sense."
"Nice theory, Daniel. Pay attention," Vala chided him as Vash continued.
"I don't know if the Q really are omniscient. They certainly seem to be and yet I know that they are capable of making mistakes. I know Q 'miscalculated' often enough when we were traveling together."
"Oh, really?" mocked Q, his disembodied head appearing in front of them once again. Vash pinned him with a look, not saying a word. "All right. It may have happened once or twice." Vash continued to walk, staring silently at him. "What do you want me to say? I'm not going to take responsibility for every single thing that went wrong. And a lot of things went right. Who's the reason you have your pick of assignments from your precious Daystrom Institute?"
"Okay," Vash relented. "I was just pointing out that while the Q are powerful, you're not infallible."
"Why make you feel even more insignificant? I know Jean-Luc would be terribly upset if I didn't let him feel like he got the best of me sometimes." With that, Q's head disappeared.
"What about the Ferengi?" asked Sam. "On P9T071 I got the impression that they try to talk themselves out of situations rather than fighting. Is that true for all of them or just the ones we dealt with there?"
"That pretty much describes the entire Ferengi race," Vash confirmed. "Q said Sovak's involved in this so I would guess that he's the brains of this particular operation."
"Depending of which of Netan's associates are here, the Ferengi could have met their match," Daniel observed.
"I don't know Netan, but Sovak's rarely been outmaneuvered in any kind of trading. It's the only thing he's really good at. And he'll do just about anything to be the first to have a new product. I'd bet he wants that kassa bad."
"With Netan under intense pressure to maintain control of his own organization, he'll be trying to take advantage of everyone he can. If he has most of his seconds here, he can control them. But if most of them are back in our reality, he's going to be desperate to get the best of the Ferengi here and get back before someone else seizes control of his operation," Sam pointed out.
"Desperate men are dangerous, and Netan doubly so," Vala said. "Once he realizes SG-1 is involved, he's likely to become even more reckless."
"Been making friends, have you?" Vash grinned.
"Well, he hasn't been able to kill us and we do keep muddling things up for him," Vala grinned back.
Picard glanced back just in time to see the matching grins on their faces, and to catch Sam's smug expression and Beverly's knowing look in response to Vala's comment. "Uh-oh," he said quietly.
Cameron, also seeing the women all wearing identical expressions, nodded. "That can't be good. Hear what they said?"
"No," Picard answered, "And I'm fairly sure I don't want to know."
They had been hearing the sound of rushing water and soon were able to see glimpses of a river through the trees. The opposite bank appeared to be lower than the one they followed. Worf halted the group just past a stretch of rapids and indicated a clearing visible on the other side.
"Kassa?" he asked Teal'c quietly.
"Indeed."
Picard and Cameron joined them and soon everyone was peering through the tree line at the kassa field across the river.
"How large is that field?" asked Cameron.
"And where are the Ferengi?" asked Picard.
Beverly checked her tricorder. "About four hundred square meters. The Ferengi appear to be on the opposite side, with a group of humans."
"How many?" asked Chakotay.
"Seven Ferengi, seven humans."
"That's probably almost all the people Netan has with him. I'd say one, two more on the ship at most," Cameron informed them. "What about the Ferengi ships?"
"There should be no more than two Ferengi on each ship," Worf told them.
"We really don't need to seize control of all three ships," Cameron said. "Just Netan's Alkesh. Sam, you,Vala and Daniel can handle that. Once you're in control, just sit tight until I give the word, then ring up Netan and his crew and march them to one of the holding cells. We'll keep them there until Q sends us back to our universe and we can contact the Prometheus for a ride home."
"What are you going to be doing, oh glorious leader?" asked Vala.
"Teal'c and I are going to neutralize Netan and his crew on the planet at the same time that Picard neutralizes the Ferengi and Q takes on Q Two. Couldn't be simpler."
"Neutralize?" asked Picard.
"Well, yeah. Not in any permanent manner of course. Just enough to break up this little alliance and get Q, both of them, to send everyone back where they belong."
"And home by dinner," murmured Chakotay.
"What's your plan B?" Picard asked.
"Plan B?"
"Someone once told me that plan A never works. So we'd better have a plan B. With details."
Worf and Teal'c drew closer as Cameron and Picard started pitching ideas and tactics. Not be left out, Sam, Daniel and Chakotay joined in the discussion. In the end, they had several back up plans, the result of trying to foresee each and every possible circumstance that could possible result. Only one dilemma remained.
"How do we contact Q to let him know we're ready?" asked Cameron.
"I'm a little surprised he hasn't shown up already," replied Picard.
"Q," hissed Vash. "I know you're listening. Are you ready?"
There was no response.
"Q," Vala hissed again, annoyed. "Quit trying to ignore us."
Still no response.
"Fine," Vash shrugged. "We're just going to go ahead. If you want to help, fine. If not, just stay out of the way."
"I was busy," Q protested as he appeared in his trademark bright flash of light. "I'm quite taken with a rather intriguing sort of creature on the most idyllic little planet. Slimy, but quite fascinating."
"Sorry to interrupt, but this whole thing was your idea. Just figured you'd want to know we were ready to move. But now you know, so you can go right back to your slimy friends."
"Where you belong," growled Worf under his breath.
"I heard that," Q told him without turning. "They can get along without me for a while. Ready when you are, mon capitaine."
Picard nodded and tapped his communicator. "Data, beam Colonel Carter, Vala, Dr. Jackson, Vash and Beverly to the Lucian Alliance ship. Q, can you move the rest of us closer to the Ferengi on the surface without alerting Q Two?"
"Absolutely!" Q assured them, adding to himself. "As long as he isn't paying too close attention."
"I have the coordinates, Captain," Data's voice came over the communicator. "Beaming them now."
Cameron watched the transporter beam shimmer around them before turning to Picard. "If they're all in one location, we should be able to split up and trap them between us. Q, can you move half of us to each side of Netan and his pals?"
"Only two groups?" Q replied archly. "If you insist."
The next thing Cameron knew, he and Teal'c were at the edge of a small trail entering the woods from the kassa field. "Guess he can. I should've asked him if he could also arrange for us to communicate with each other."
"But you can, Colonel Mitchell," Q mocked. "I'll make sure Picard can hear you."
"Hear that, Teal'c? We've got ourselves our very own messenger boy."
"That will be most convenient."
Q sniffed. "Very amusing. You are more like Picard than even I thought. Speaking of Picard, they are about thirty meters north of you, at the corner of the field. Picard is in the woods on that side of the field. He suggests moving in on Netan and Sovak's little party in four minutes. That should put the entire group between the two of you."
Cameron checked his watch, nodded. "They're directly between us?"
"Where else?"
Q's voice faded and Teal'c and Cameron shared a resigned look. "This whole alternate universe thing is not as fun as the reports made it seem."
Teal'c did not reply, thinking that Colonel Mitchell had a strange concept of fun. Cameron monitored his watch closely and the two of them began moving quietly in the direction that Q had indicated. Soon he was able to detect slight movement to their north, indicating that Picard's team was also moving. Within moments Teal'c and Cameron could hear the Ferengi leader negotiating with Netan over the kassa harvest. Teal'c took a position that would allow him to cover half the group from one side while Cameron moved to cover the other half. Only a few thin rows of immature kassa hid them from the gathered mercenaries, allowing them to see as well as hear the two groups. Cameron peered at the group in front of him, trying to identify the other members of the Lucian Alliance.
Q appeared in front of him, one finger on his lips to indicate that Cameron and Teal'c shouldn't talk. "They can't hear me, but they could hear you. Start moving in. Now."
Cameron and Teal'c exchanged a look, then Cameron nodded. Q disappeared and the two members of SG-1 began moving carefully through the kassa. They could only hope that Picard and his team were doing the same.
As they broke through the cover of the kassa, they saw Picard, Worf and Chakotay break through on the opposite side of the group. At the same moment, the Lucian Alliance and the Ferengis disappeared in a bright flash of light, leaving Starfleet officers and SG-1 staring at each other in dismay.
"Q!" Picard said in frustration.
"Sorry, he can't be here right now," responded the handsome blond man who was strolling casually out of the rows of kassa. "I sent him away. A long way away."
"Q Two?" questioned Cameron.
Ah, is that how you lower life forms differentiate us? How interesting. Yes, I guess I would be Q Two to you."
"Where did you send Netan and the Ferengi?" asked Cameron.
"To their ships, of course. Now, whatever shall I do with you?" Q Two pretended to ponder his question. "Oh, yes, of course. How perfect." He waved his hand negligently and the planet was deserted.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Sam found that being transported by the Enterprise was nearly identical to the Asgard beaming technology she was used to. The sensation was slightly different but the speed was the same. Between one breath and the next, she found herself and her companions in a hall on the Alkesh. Quickly they sought cover behind one of the structural supports and surveyed the hall to be sure they were alone.
"Whatever crew Netan left behind is probably in the command center. That way," Vala said, gesturing behind them. Sam nodded and motioned for Vash and Beverly to follow Vala, while she and Daniel covered the group from the rear. They moved rapidly down the hall, Vash and Beverly gazing curiously at the Lucian Alliance vessel.
Vala peered cautiously into the control room, then rejoined the others some little distance from the door. "Just two of them. One at the control station, the other monitoring a computer, probably trying to keep an eye on what's going on down on the planet. Neither one is watching the door."
"Okay, we slip in, take them by surprise. Is there some place we can stash them out of the way?" Sam asked.
"A storage room just a little way down this hall. There's another corridor heading out of the control room on the opposite side, but I doubt there's anyone else left on the ship. We'll need to check it out though.
"The ship's onboard sensors can tell us if there is," Daniel added.
"Okay, let's disable these guys as gently as we can. We want to return everyone to their home galaxy as intact as possible," Daniel suggested.
"Would a phaser set on stun help?" asked Vash, nonchalantly offering hers.
"Yeah, it would. We wouldn't have to risk trying to sneak up on them." Sam took the offered phaser, examining it closely. Satisfied, she nodded. "Ready?"
Subduing Netan's crewmembers proved almost too simple. A pair of quick blasts from the phaser and Vala's zat, and both men crumpled soundlessly to the floor. Beverly checked them briefly, to be sure they were only unconscious. They were from another universe, after all; what if they reacted differently to the stun setting? Reassured, Beverly gestured at Daniel and he dragged them off to Vala's storage room.
Meanwhile Sam began studying the control panel. "There's no other life signs on the ship. Looks like Netan took everyone else with him to the planet for whatever is going on there."
"Any way to tell how many Ferengi are on the other ships?" Daniel asked Vala.
"Not really. I can tell you if there are life signs, but not exactly how many. Looks like Netan's had all nonessential power routed into the engines and weapons. Including all but the most basic sensors. Interesting. We've got plenty of power, though. Looks like Netan wanted to be prepared to hide if he needed to; extra power's been routed to the cloak too. Everything else looks normal. Do you know if the Ferengi ships have cloaking technology?" Sam turned towards Vash and Beverly.
"I don't believe so," Vash replied. "Although it certainly wouldn't surprise me if Sovak at least did. Slipping in and out of places he shouldn't be is his favorite mode of operation and a cloak would be very helpful with that."
Sam nodded. "I'll set the sensors to detect cloaking, just in case he did and decides to use it."
"I checked out the main cargo bay," Daniel told them as he returned to the command center. "It's full of guess what? Kassa. Kassa seeds, kassa seedlings, ready to eat kassa. Kassa in all stages of growth. I'd say Netan came prepared."
"Which makes me wonder if this isn't his first trip here. I mean, it had to take some time for that kassa on the planet to ripen, even if Q Two did help. Netan doesn't sound like the type to carry all that around just in case," Beverly noted.
"He's a smuggler," Vala shrugged. Beverly and Daniel exchanged a baffled look but before either could ask for more of an explanation, Vash agreed.
"Deep down everyone's a Ferengi. Beverly's right. Netan had to have been here before. Even if Q Two had visited him in your universe, Netan's not going to part with kassa in any form without being in total control of the outcome from seed to addiction. Not if he thinks he may gain access to an entirely kassa-free universe. Q Two probably didn't have a very hard time convincing him to make an exploratory visit."
"So Netan came prepared for anything he might find – and with anything he might be able to sell. He can make the most money right away selling the mature crop, but he can also set up the Ferengi as growers or distributors and take a cut of the profits on their crops."
Daniel looked at Vala. "I don't want to know how you know so much about peddling illegal drugs," he told her softly, shaking his head at her innocent expression as she shrugged.
"It would take a whole of lot of profit to turn a Ferengi into a farmer, and they don't share profit in any case," Vash was telling Sam.
"Netan tends to take rather direct action against anyone trying to cut him out of a deal. We know he has contacts with various bounty hunters and mercenaries in our universe; if he doesn't already in this one, I'm sure he will," Sam warned.
"Provided he doesn't just eliminate the Ferengi on the spot," Vala pointed out.
The console in front of Daniel chimed. "We've got company. The rings just activated."
"Colonel Mitchell?" asked Beverly.
"He can't activate the rings from the surface," Sam said, readying her weapon. "It has to be Netan. We need to secure this area."
Vala moved to an adjacent console, scanning the buttons purposefully. Casually she pushed one. "That should do it," she announced.
"Do what?" Daniel asked dubiously.
"I just sealed off the main corridor leading from the rings to the command center."
"Now what?" asked Beverly.
Everyone looked at Sam. "You are the ranking military officer here," Vala told her brightly.
"Well, one of them," Beverly conceded, "but you do have more experience with the Lucian Alliance so I'm happy to follow your lead."
Sam nodded, but before she had a chance to answer, Mitchell's voice came over her radio. "Sam, Daniel, it's us. You can unseal the command center."
"Cam, what's going on?" Sam asked, stopping Vala from unsealing the corridor with a slight gesture.
"Don't know. Q Two sent us here. Any idea where Netan is?"
"I thought you were taking care of that."
"Yeah, me, too. Uh, Sam, how about releasing the force field in this corridor?"
Soon Cameron and Picard joined the rest of SG-1 in the command center. Quickly they related what had occurred on the planet.
"So we've got us an Alkesh with two of Netan's henchmen secured in a storage room; a powerful god like being on the planet; another powerful god like being who knows where and no idea what happened to Netan or the Ferengi," Cameron summed up the situation after they had exchanged information. "Just once I'd like a mission to go according to plan right from the start."
"Remember what I said about Plan B?" asked Picard. "Vash, do you have any idea what happened to Q?"
Vash shook her head, regarding them seriously from Picard's side. "He could be literally anywhere. It really depends on Q Two. I think the two of them are fairly evenly matched. I do know Q will be back as soon as he can and he won't be happy. He doesn't like to be bested."
"Just like a man," Vala observed, earning looks of varying degrees of scorn from the men in the room.
Sam looked up from a console she had been scanning. "I have lifesigns on all the Ferengi ships, but no way to tell which are Ferengi and which are human." She indicated one of the Ferengi ships. "There are considerably more lifesigns on this one, though."
"It's a safe bet Netan is there then," Cameron surmised. "Does this ship have a cloak?"
"Yes, but how are we going to transport them from the Ferengi ship? The rings won't work without a platform and the Ferengi don't have one." Sam nodded to Vala as she spoke and the other woman moved easily into position at a pilot's console.
"The Enterprise might be able to help if they can get close enough without being detected," Picard offered. He tapped his communicator and tried to hail Data. There was no answer.
"I'll try the ship's communicators array. If you can give me the frequency," Sam offered. Chakotay moved to input the information into the Al'kesh's computer.
"Maybe we could just talk to the Ferengi. I know it's radical, but," Beverly spread her hands and gave Jean-Luc a questioning look.
"There's a thought," Cameron conceded. "Let's get a little closer first. Engage cloak and move us in."
Vala complied. Just as she was halting the ship, the communications console beeped. "We're being hailed," Sam reported. "It's not the Enterprise, though. I still haven't been able to make contact with them."
"It's probably a Ferengi on the other end. It might be better if Jean-Luc were to answer," Vash suggested.
Cameron nodded and Sam looked to Picard for directions.
"Let's hear it."
"Hew-mon ship, we have your captain and all of his lieutenants. We will trade them to you in exchange for all of the kassa." Sovak's face filled the screen
"No, I don't think so. You will return Netan and his officers. Then you will leave and not return to this planet."
"Picard! This does not concern you. I will negotiate with the hew-mons from Netan's universe, not with Starfleet."
"Is that Sovak?" Cameron asked Vash quietly. At her nod, he moved to stand beside Picard. "Sovak, this is Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell. You want to negotiate with us, you talk to Captain Picard."
"Colonel Mitchell, this is a business deal. There is no need to involve Starfleet."
"You involved Starfleet when you started planning to distribute an addictive substance throughout the galaxy," Picard informed him.
"Addicitive substance? If you mean kassa, well, kassa is nothing more than a food source. If these hew-mons told you it was some sort of drug, they are lying."
"Sovak, we both know kassa is more than a food source. Return Netan and his men; leave and do not return to this planet and Starfleet will not hold you responsible."
"In return you will give me all of the kassa in storage on that ship. Deal?"
"No kassa. That is nonnegotiable," Cameron told him.
"You want me to just give you Netan? Captain, you can't be serious."
"Here I thought you were friends," interjected Cameron. "Sounds to me like you're holding Netan hostage. Not a very nice thing to do to a friend.
"Ah, but the twenty-first Rule of Acquisition says 'Never place friendship before profit.'"
"Sovak, you really are slime, aren't you?" Vash pushed her way in front of Picard.
Sovak visibly recoiled. "I knew you took up with this one, Picard, but I had no idea you brought her along when talking business. A piece of advice – free advice, even. Send her home. Women do not belong in business. And clothed, too. Disgraceful!"
Chakotay intervened before Sam or Vala could say anything. "It's a cultural peculiarity. Ferengi women don't often leave home so it is considered unnecessary for them to wear clothing."
Picard was saying, "Business, Sovak? I was hoping we could make arrangements for Netan's return to his ship."
"In exchange for the kassa, yes."
"The kassa is nonnegotiable."
"Then so is Netan's return. At this time. I don't think we have anything more to talk about. Sovak out."
The communications console went dead as Sovak's image disappeared. Everyone in the command center relaxed.
"What an interesting race," Vala commented. "It's a wonder their mothers don't drown the babies at birth, if they happen to be male."
"'Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother'. Another one of their Rules of Acquisition," Beverly cautioned them.
"So is 'Free advice is seldom cheap,'" Picard observed. "Yet Sovak just offered us some."
"Probably to make you pause. Just like you're doing," Vash told him. "We've caught Sovak off guard. He didn't expect Starfleet to be here. He thought he'd be dealing with whoever Netan left on this ship and he thought they'd be happy to trade the kassa for Netan. But he backed himself into a corner and couldn't retract his demands when he realized Jean-Luc was here."
"And when he reports to Netan that Cameron is here as well, Netan will know that SG-1 is involved. Of all the people in our universe, we're probably the last ones that he wanted to know that he was trading in another universe," Daniel observed.
"And by demanding all the kassa in exchange for Netan, Sovak's backed them both into the same corner. Interesting. That's pretty reckless for Sovak at a first encounter," Vash told them.
"Reckless, as in he could already be addicted to kassa?" asked Beverly.
Picard looked at SG—1. Sam answered for them. "We know it works almost immediately. We had SG personnel who were addicted after their first exposure. I'm not sure how Ferengi physiology compares to human, but it's possible."
Beverly groaned.
"We have to assume that Sovak is under the influence of the kassa," Picard told them.
"Wonder how many other Ferengi are too?" Chakotay asked.
"No way to know," Beverly sighed. "We should probably just assume they all are."
Sam and Chakotay were hunched over the communications console some time later, trying to make contact with the Enterprise when the console beeped to indicate an incoming transmission. Quickly they called Picard and Mitchell. At Mitchell's nod, Sam opened the channel and Netan's face filled the viewscreen.
"Colonel Mitchell. I see Sovak wasn't lying when he said you were here."
"Nope, he was telling the flat out truth on that. He told us that you were his hostage. That true?"
"It would appear so, for the moment. My men and I have been disarmed and confined in what appears to be a cargo hold. What of the men on my ship? Which I see you have made yourself at home on."
"In a cargo hold?" Cameron shook his head in mock sympathy. "Your men are in one of the storage areas on this ship. I'll be sure to relay your concern to them."
"Sovak told me that you were in command of my ship. Colonel, I know we haven't always seen eye to eye, but I hope you know that I bear you and your team no personal ill will."
"And pigs fly," Cameron muttered. Sam stifled a chuckle as he turned back to Netan. "Other than trying to kill us, you mean?"
"Colonel, we are both adults. I have done nothing but protect my business, as you would."
"Yada, yada, yada. What do you want, Netan?"
Netan leaned closer to the screen, his face overflowing the edges of the viewscreen. "Get me out of here, Mitchell!' he hissed. "These Ferengi are insane! Sovak just can't take no for an answer."
"Are you refusing to sell kassa to them? Because to be honest, that doesn't sound like you at all."
"I'm refusing to give them all the kassa in exchange for freedom for my three men and me. You don't want them to have the kassa any more than I do; help me get out of here and we both get what we want."
"And then you turn around and sell them the kassa anyway. Just out of curiosity, how many Ferengi are already addicted to it?"
Netan leaned back and glanced around. "Just Sovak."
"You're lying."
"Colonel – "
"Netan, I really don't have time to screw around. Carter's already figured out how we can get back to our own universe. We're still here only because I didn't like the idea of leaving the Lucian Alliance loose in this universe. So why don't you just level with me?"
"I only gave kassa to Sovak. How should I know if he's addicted or who else he might have given it to? I don't know anything about him or the rest of these Ferengi. Can you get me out of here or not?"
"I sort of like the idea of you trapped with the Ferengi."
"Cameron," Daniel said warningly, noting that Netan was becoming increasingly frustrated.
Cameron nodded his understanding. "Look, Netan, I can't promise anything right now, but we'll do what we can to get you out of there soon."
"Fair enough. Netan out."
The viewscreen went blank.
"How did he access communications without Sovak knowing?" Vala asked.
"He didn't," Vash replied. "Sovak had to have known he was hailing us. That wasn't the cargo bay of any Ferengi ship I've ever seen. It was guest quarters; Netan may not be as much of a hostage as he wants us to believe. Still if you access communications from guest quarters, the bridge knows. Sovak may not have known what was said, but he knows Netan contacted someone."
"And we're the only logical answer," Daniel concluded. "We've got to find a way to get Netan and his people back. Without giving up the kassa."
"What if we did?" Vala asked.
"Did what?"
"Gave up the kassa. We don't have to let them keep it. Why can't we trade it to Sovak, then simply take it back?"
"You mean, make a deal for Netan's freedom and renege on it?" Beverly asked.
"Uh huh," Vala nodded. "We get Netan and his people; Sovak gets what he wants. He doesn't have to know we're not going to let him keep it. We go home with all the kassa and no harm done."
"What about Sovak's addiction?" Beverly asked. "That's not going to just go away."
"Actually it will," Sam told her. "It'll take a little while, of course, but in every case we've seen, the effects diminish quickly, usually within days. The longer someone's been addicted, the longer it takes, but from the sounds of it, Sovak hasn't been addicted very long. He'll be unpleasant and cranky for a while, but withdrawal is relatively painless."
"And since there's no kassa in this universe, there's no chance that he will relapse," Beverly concluded.
"So we contact Sovak, make a deal to swap Netan for the kassa and then steal the kassa right back, preferably without Sovak finding that part out right away." Vala looked around. "Sounds great. How are we going to pull it off?"
"And once we do, how are we going to get back to our universe? We still can't even contact the Enterprise and Netan thinks that we have a way home." Sam directed her question at Cameron.
Cameron shrugged. "We do. Q."
Sam shook her head in resignation, but before she had a chance to respond, Picard said, "We have to assume that Netan and his men really are hostages. Even if we find that they're not, we've still got to get them back here before Sovak has time to react. Especially since he'll want to work every angle he can before actually releasing them."
"Preferably before he knows we have them," Chakotay added. "He's most likely negotiating terms with Netan right now, too. See who offers the most profitable deal."
"A strike team would be most effective," Teal'c contributed, causing everyone in the command center to look at him. The Starfleet personnel had forgotten the quiet man was there. SG-1, however, immediately started weighing the idea, mentally considering who would be best included in such a team.
"You have to stay here, Captain Picard, too," Sam told Cameron. "You're the ones Sovak and Netan are going to expect to talk to on the comm link. If you're not here, Sovak will know something is up. If we don't succeed in getting Netan and his mean out before Sovak finds us out, you'll need to negotiate trading them for kassa. And figure out a way to get the kassa back from him once the trade is done."
Beverly agreed. "Most illegal drugs also enhance the suspicious nature of the addict. I'm guessing kassa does as well. You'd two better be on hand to talk to Sovak and alleviate his paranoria."
"I'll take Vala, Teal'c and Vash," Sam said.
Picard, Chakotay and Daniel argued her selections, but in the end Sam prevailed. While the others procured gear and equipment for the mission, Sam and Daniel were able to scan the Ferengi ship and determine the general area where Netan and his crew were being held. They were trusting to Vash's knowledge of Ferengi ships to pinpoint the exact location once they were on the Ferengi ship.
"Good luck," said Cameron as they entered the ring platform and he began the activation sequence that Sam had found in the computer linking the rings with the Ferengi transporters. Netan and Sovak had apparently been exchanging technological information as well as kassa.
They found themselves in one of the cargo bays of Sovak's ship a few minutes later. Avoiding various boxes and containers, they made their way toward the door.
"Wait," Vash hissed, darting to an information terminal. Tentatively she pushed buttons, becoming more confident as each sequence was accepted by the computer. "Sovak really should change his passwords a little more often," she said as the terminal began scrolling information on the monitor. Vash scanned it quickly, nodding to herself.
Sam, Vala and Teal'c gathered around her. Vash indicated several lines of text on the screen. "This is Sovak's personal inventory listing. There's no kassa listed, so if he's got any he's not telling."
"Couldn't he just not list it on the inventory?" Vala asked. "That's what I would do, or any smuggler I know. Or he could have a hidden storage area somewhere on the ship."
"Oh, I'm sure he does, at least one. And I can guarantee that it's not in the official inventory. But Sovak also keeps his own inventory of the less than savory items that he deals in. He just should change his password way more often. Especially since he tells people what it is."
"It's also possible that he doesn't have any," Sam pointed out.
"Very possible," Vash agreed. She closed Sovak's inventory and pulled up a schematic of the ship. "We're here," she told them, indicating the cargo bay on the screen. "Guest quarters are here, here and here, but this one shows four life signs inside."
"That's our target," Sam said immediately. "Can you get us in?"
"Sovak gets very chatty when intoxicated, so I can do quite a lot on this ship. Including get into those quarters."
Vash led them unerringly through the Ferengi ship. She quickly accessed the lock on the guest quarters door, but before she could open the door and enter, Teal'c stepped between her and the door, his staff weapon held securely in his hand. Sam slipped into position next to him. At her nod, Vash opened the door and the two stepped inside quickly, sweeping the room with their weapons. Vash followed them in, Vala doing a final sweep of the corridor before she stepped inside, allowing the door to close behind her.
Sam held her weapon steadily pointed at Netan and his officers who were clustered around a table on the opposite side of the room. Teal'c finished his sweep of the adjoining rooms and gave Sam the 'all clear' signal. She and Vala lowered their weapons as Netan regained his composure.
"Ah, the brilliant Colonel Carter, who has already figured out a way home for us. I am quite impressed; Q assured me that there was no way to do that without his help."
"So much for Q's supposed omnipotence," Sam shrugged. "So you're being held in a cargo bay?"
"Perhaps I exaggerated."
"Perhaps you wanted to lure us here for Sovak," Vala suggested.
"I assure you, we really are captives. Sovak is holding us, hoping that my crew will trade the kassa for us. I'm assuming he now knows that you are in command of my ship?"
"He does," Teal'c replied.
"Sovak will probably be along very soon now to once again try to persuade me to order my crew to hand over the kassa. I would very much like to be gone before then."
Sam nodded. "Just one thing before we go. I am in charge of this – rescue. You will follow my orders, understood?"
"Of course, Colonel. We understand," Netan replied, indicating his seconds who were also nodding their assent.
Sam and Vash led the way into the corridor, Vala and Teal'c herding the Lucian Alliance after them and bringing up the rear. In a short time, they found themselves back in the cargo bay. Quickly scanning the room, Sam ushered everyone into the transport area. Before she could signal Daniel to transport them back to the Al'kesh, the doors to the cargo bay opened and Sovak slid in, furtively glancing back into the hall.
"You!" he growled as he saw them. "You are trying to steal my kassa! Well, you can't have it."
Sovak hurtled himself across the cargo bay. "Now!" Sam barked to Daniel. The transporter began to shimmer and Sovak leapt for them, only to land on the floor they had just vacated. Furious, he ran to the control panel in the wall, punched a few buttons and planted himself on the transporter, grinning fiercely as he began to dematerialize.
Sam hurried everyone off the ring platform as soon as they materialized. "Sovak's probably right behind us," she warned.
"Get them out of here," Cameron ordered. He, Worf, Chakotay and Daniel arrayed themselves around the ring platform, which was even then beginning to activate. Sovak materialized a moment later to find himself surrounded with a grim Klingon directly in front of him. With an incoherent cry, he rushed Worf, teeth bared and fingers curled in to claws. Worf easily sidestepped him and landed a solid punch to Sovak's jaw. The Ferengi staggered, but did not go down. Worf prepared for another punch, but Cameron intervened, pinning Sovak's arms behind him.
"Whoa, there, pal. I don't think you really want to push your luck with Mr. Worf. How 'bout we find you a nice holding cell where you can calm down?"
"This is not your business!" Sovak snarled in reply. "I had a deal with Netan; the kassa is mine. And the profit from the kassa is mine. Starfleet is not going to horn in on this business deal."
"Maybe not, but SG-1 certainly is." Cameron started moving Sovak toward the corridor, still with arms pinned behind his back.
"What concern is it of yours? This is not even your universe!" Sovak struggled futilely as he was marched swiftly toward one of the Al-kesh's cargo bays.
"That would be why it is my concern. Bad enough to have Netan and his happy corn on the loose in my universe; no need to let him hang around here too." Cameron shoved Sovak into the small empty storage room. "Now you settle yourself down and we'll be back to talk in a while."
Cameron turned around to see Sam coming down the hall towards him. "We're out of storage rooms," she told him. "Netan's men are in one; Netan is in his secret hold and Sovak's in there. If we need to confine anyone else, we're going to have to start using crew quarters."
"Secret hold?"
Sam grinned. "Yeah, his own personal smuggler's hold. He shouldn't note its location on the ship's schematics. Even in what he thinks is a code."
"Which wasn't a code to Daniel. Good man."
They found everyone who wasn't confined to s storage room in the command center a few minutes later. Vala and Daniel were making a copy of the ship's schematic in one of Daniel's ever-present journals. Vala was leaning over Daniel's shoulder, checking every line he drew against the computer's display; Daniel was doing his best to ignore her. Picard and Chakotay were deep in conversation, Vash and Beverly listening closely. Teal'c and Worf were also listening from where they had posted themselves near the entrance to the room. Cameron quietly said, "Good work" to Daniel as they passed, ignoring Vala's perky, "It was my idea" as he and Sam joined Picard.
"Colonel, we received a message from Sovak's ship demanding his return. They are accusing us of kidnapping him."
"Yeah, like we want him," Cameron responded. "What terms did you offer?"
"That's what we're discussing."
"Return of any and all kassa on their ship," Vash suggested.
"And a binding promise not to return to this planet, if the Ferengi have any such thing," Beverly added.
"Or to try to contact anyone from any other universe," contributed Sam.
Picard nodded. "Hopefully they'll learn to just deal in the universe they live in."
"That is too much to expect," Worf rumbled.
Unexpectedly Picard smiled. "I know, but it does give us some leverage next time we run into them."
At his nod, Vala hailed the Ferengi ship and an unknown Ferengi face filled the viewscreen. Picard, with Cameron and Sam in the background, presented their terms, subtly imbuing his words with dire threat against not only Sovak, but the entire Ferengi ship and its crew. When Sovak's lieutenant blustered and tried to make counter demands, Worf and Teal'c moved to stand behind their commanding officers. The Ferengi immediately backed down, agreeing to Picard's terms unconditionally.
"Sovak really needs to train his officers better," Vala observed once the communication had been broken. "No backbone."
"That pretty much guarantees that they won't challenge Sovak for his ship, cargo or a larger part of the profits," Vash explained, "It works for Sovak, except when he's 'kidnapped' and they have to negotiate his release."
"Someone's got to tell Sovak what his officer just agreed to," Chakotay pointed out.
"Sounds like fun," Vash said. "Come on."
"Take Muscles with you," Vala suggested, indicating Teal'c. "In case Sovak doesn't get it right away."
Teal'c gave her an unreadable look as he followed Vash and Chakotay.
Sovak looked up with a scowl as they entered. "Come to taunt the prisoner?"
"Prisoner?" Vash retorted. "You brought yourself here; we sure didn't. We don't want you. Lucky for you, your crew wants you back."
She proceeded to lay out the terms that his lieutenant had agreed to. Sovak tried to protest, but Vash talked over everything he tried to say. Sovak eyed Teal'c's impassive expression and unyielding pose even as he tried to object. Finally Vash finished. "Well?" she asked.
"What you ask is impossible. Even if I did agree not to distribute kassa, I need it. For medicinal purposes, of course. It has made a very noticeable difference in my digestion. Before kassa, I often had problems with – "
"I don't want to know," Vash interrupted him. "As far as any so-called medicinal purposes, kassa doesn't have any healing properties. So that argument won't work; what else have you got?"
"We know you're addicted to the stuff," Chakotay told him. "We have been assured that you will recover once you are no longer using it. I'm sure the withdrawal process is difficult, but you will survive it."
"Indeed. It will be most painful for the first few days, but the pain soon passes, leaving only the craving. There is no kassa in this universe so you will soon learn to live with it," Teal'c told him. Sovak regarded him with horror.
"Surely it won't hurt to let me have part of this ship's cargo. To compensate for my time and trouble, of course."
"Your time and trouble?" Vash repeated incredulously . "Listen, you little money grubbing troll, you're in no position to negotiate. That's already been done. We're just here to tell you what was agreed to."
"But I didn't agree to these terms," Sovak countered.
"Your lieutenant did, in your name and on your authority. So you can just get used to it."
"My authority?"
"You gave him that authority when you so hastily abandoned your ship to follow us here. He is your second in command, correct?"
"That doesn't give him the right to negotiate my kassa away!"
Vash leaned close to him. "Your other choice is to deal with Worf and him." She indicated Teal'c, who loomed menacingly close, eyes never leaving Sovak.
"Just enough kassa to get rid of the excruciating pain behind my eyes?" Sovak pleaded hopefully.
"Here," Chakotay said, handing him a tablet. "The doctor sent that for you. She guessed you'd have a headache by now."
"I curse the day I met you," Sovak told Vash.
She smiled sweetly. "I know. You have no idea how satisfying that is for me. Come on, let's get you back to your ship."
They entered the command center to find everyone watching the Ferengi ship turn and vanish into space.
"Bye, little troll man," Vala said to the retreating ship. "Now what about us?"
"We still haven't been able to reach the Enterprise," Sam told them, "so I've set a course to their last known coordinates. We'll keep trying to hail them."
"Let's go," said Cameron at the same time as Picard said, "Make it so."
With an amused glance from one to the other, Sam did.
While looking as if she was doing nothing more than piloting the ship, Sam was turning over ideas for how to return to their own universe. She knew how to build a bridge, but not how to be sure they crossed into the universe from which they had come. Daniel took the seat beside her. "Any ideas?" he asked, knowing her well enough to interpret the concentration on her face.
"We don't have any markers, for lack of a better term. Nothing to follow back to our own universe. We could spend the rest of our lives bridging from one universe to another and never get home."
"What if we went back through the Stargate on Kappa Seven?"
"That's the only thing that might give us a chance. If I can somehow direct the wormhole back along the path that brought us here, it should work. We'll need to find a way to power and dial the 'Gate, but I think the Enterprise will help. I just hope the 'Gate provides enough direction to get us back where we belong."
There was a brief bright flash of light. Q leaned up against the console in front of her. "That's rather advanced thinking, for a human. I'd almost say brilliant, if It wasn't completely unnecessary."
"Hardly unnecessary since we have to get home somehow," Sam retorted.
"Never fear – I will take care of that. Your way would work, but it's so tedious." Q rolled his eyes as he pushed himself into a standing position. "Well, mon capitaine, I see you've managed to send the Ferengi packing. And rounded up all the outworlders in one place. Some days you really do exceed my expectations of you."
"Thank you," Picard replied dryly. "is it too much to hope that you have managed to deal with Q?"
"Your confidence in me is overwhelming. I will admit, Q was rather more of a handful than I thought he would be, but the Continuum was finally able to make him understand his place. I'm sure he'll still consort with the Ferengi, but he'll leave your universe alone."
The communications console beeped insistently. Chakotay checked the display and announced, "It's the Enterprise. On speaker."
"Riker to Picard. Sir, do you read me?"
"I do now, Number One. We are on an intercept course. Status of Enterprise?"
"Just the way you left her, sir. We were beginning to worry about you, though; you've been out of communications range for quite a while."
"Completely Q's doing!" Q insisted.
"The problem seems to have been resolved," Picard replied to Riker. "Notify me when we are in transport range. Picard out."
"You're sure Q Two will leave our universe alone?" Cameron questioned Q.
"Even he won't go against the Continuum again. At least in this way." Q assured him.
"Your word on that?" Vala insisted. Vash made no attempt to disguise her snicker.
"Absolutely. You have my word as a Q," Q promised pompously. Vash turned into Jean-Luc's chest to muffle her laughter as Beverly and Chakotay chuckled with her. Even Picard gave him an incredulous smile.
"It may not be worth much, but it's better than nothing," Daniel observed.
"Not much," Vash managed to choke out.
"I should have left you much further out in the Delta Quandrant," Q grumbled.
"We're coming up on the Enterprise. Transport range in 30 seconds," Chakotay informed them.
"After the incident on Tama, I thought we would never see you again, but this has proved me wrong. It's been a pleasure to work with SG-1," Picard addressed Sam, but included them all. "Give General O'Neill my best."
"I will, sir," Sam told him. She moved to embrace Vash and Beverly, Vala following. Goodbyes were said, Worf and Teal'c saluted each other a final time and Cameron made one final attempt to trade archaeologists with Picard. Vash swatted him playfully and wrapped Picard's arm around her shoulders.
"Are you done with all the sentimental nonsense?" Q asked. "It's been fun; didn't it turn out well and will we ever see each other again? Yes, yes and I wouldn't be surprised if you did. Humans!"
In Q's trademark flash of light, Picard and his crew were gone and SG-1 found themselves in a clearing that looked familiar but wasn't quite the same. The MALP was quietly transmitting data from its place near the Stargate.
"P3M376?" asked Cameron.
"According to the MALP, it is," Daniel replied.
"We need to gate back to the SGC and report." Sam told them.
"Dial it up, Jackson. Can't wait to see the look on Landry's face when he hears this little adventure."
