This is a short story for everyone who feels abandoned, or has ever felt like nothing was worth it anymore. It takes place in L.A, about a week before Alex Kelly ran away to the Orange County.
p.s. Flashbacks are in italic to make it easier to follow.
-Ethereal-123
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And suddenly you're free
She shut the door quietly. So much noise was coming from downstairs. She needed this silence. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, relieved to finally hear nothing. For the first time of her melomaniac life, she wished she was deaf. Yes, she was ready to give up on ever listening to music if it could stop the noise downstairs. Right now, she was ready to sacrifice that much.
After taking a deep breath of desperation, Alex opened back her eyes and started to throw in her backpack a pair of jeans, a few shirts and about sixty music records. She had to leave the rest behind, there was no space, and two trips was not even an option. Turning around in circle in her room, the young blonde tried to quickly assemble her life in a backpack. All she had was a backpack, and she couldn't even fill that up. She bit her lower lip. What did she have to hang on to?
.::.
«It's wide, isn't it?» Said a voice behind. Alex turned around. Before her stood a short brunette with wavy hair and a knowing grin.
«What's wide?» She heard herself ask.
«The ocean, the sight in front of you.»
«You always make obvious comments like that to break the ice?» Alex asked back, rather rudely. But the brunette didn't seem offended. If anything, it was as if she expected that kind of reply. She simply shrugged her shoulders and offered her hand.
«I'm Jodie» she said. Alex looked at the extended hand for a moment before taking a step back.
«And I'm leaving» She replied.
.::.
Alex zipped her backpack and threw it on her shoulder, grabbed her guitar with the empty hand and left the room after looking at it one last time. Her eyes lingered on her queen sized bed. That was probably what she would miss the most from there. Then her eyes gazed at a picture frame. A family portrait. Just one great loving family.
.::.
It was five past five, her parents would be home any minute now. Here she was, standing in the living room, papers in her shaky hands, her thoughts missing in motion. Alex thought it was what she wanted but suddenly she was doubting it. This could break their heart, destroy the family forever. But was there anything left to save? How much did yesterday's fight shatter to pieces their family? She heard the key get into the lock, and the doorknob twist. Alex started thinking that maybe she has overeacted with all that. Maybe her parents forgot, or felt bad about their reaction. Maybe there was still hope for forgiveness and understanding. And then here they stood, at the other side of the door, facing her. Her creators. Husband and wife. Parents. She swallowed a bit to regain composure and walked straight up to them.
«What do you want?» Her father asked. She could tell by the way he was looking at her with disgust that he did not regret a single word he had said yesterday. She put the papers on the table next to them. They were a bit wrinkled because she was so nervously holding them for the last hour or so.
«What's this now?» Her father asked with the same annoyance in his voice.
«Emancipation forms» She heard herself say. «Since, you know, you said I was no longer your daughter. Care to make it official?» She wanted to show she didn't care. She really did. But she could feel herself get buried in her own shame. Her father had this way of looking at her. She clenched her fist, prepared to battle anyway.
«Don't pretend that now you suddenly care or...» She started, she had it all prepared, but soon enough she found out it was useless trouble. He just reached for a pen and signed right away, did not even read the form, and passed the pen to his wife. Alex dumbly looked as, under pressure, her mom signed her off too, officially erased her from her life without any second thought. At all. Her father then picked up the form and gave it back to her. But it was as if it was someone else taking it from him. As if Alex wasn't there anymore. A ghost of her stood there in front of her parents. No longer legal gardiens. That ghost politely thanked them and left.
.::.
Alex picked up the portrait and threw it with all her strength against the wall, watching it shatter to pieces. Abandoned by her own family, the only people in the world who are supposed to love you unconditionally. How are you supposed to believe in love after that? How are you supposed to feel about others, about yourself? How can anything ever make sense again?
.::.
«No you're not.» Alex stopped halfway.
«I'm not?» She asked, her back turned to Jodie.
«A couple of my friends started a bonefire not too far from here, we got guitars and beer. You're joining me over there.» Alex turned to face the girl.
«And why would I do that?» She asked.
«So I can forgive you for making me leave them in the first place.» Alex raised an eyebrow.
«I never made you leave them, I didn't ask you to come here and throw at me your worst pickup line ever.»
«Indeed, but I've heard you sing at the local bar» Jodie replied. «There is just no way I could just let you walk away without at least trying to get you to sing with us.» Alex chuckled.
«Oh okay» She said, «So it's my fault that you're digging my voice?»
«Totally » Jodie nodded.
«And because you're so into me, I have to make you feel better by accepting to spend the night.»
«You're two for two» She winked. «Now come on.» Alex smiled.
«You know» She said, walking towards her, «I'm not usually that easy pick up». Jodie shrugged as she slipped her hand into hers.
«Don't feel bad about yourself, I'm impossible to resist.»
.::.
Alex looked at her phone. She had about eight missed calls and a dozen of text messages, all from Jodie. Sighing, she put the phone back in her pockets, picked back her guitar case and left the room for good this time. She didn't even bother to look at her parents when she passed them, and headed straight to the door. Screw them. She threw her stuff in the passenger's seat of her jeep and started the engine. She had no idea where she was heading, things were probably as rotten everywhere, but she had to get away. Just as she was about to pull out in the street, she heard banging on the car and hit the breaks.
«Jesus, Alex, fuck!» Fuck me, Alex thought to herself.
«Get the fuck out of this car» Jodie kept screaming as she open the door. «You're not leaving like this before we get to talk.»
.::.
She walked through the door, and out in the streets, the emancipation forms still in hand. They signed it, it was over, she was now emancipated. What it suppose to feel like this? She couldn't even describe how she felt. All she could say was that it wasn't joy.
Alex didn't remember getting in her car and driving, but the next thing she knew she was standing in front of Jodie's apartment. She didn't know why she drove there, what she was expecting to get from that girl, but a part of her must be thinking that it was the thing to do. Then again, from all her flings, Jodie was the only one she actually felt a connection with, the only person that it would make sense to go to. She walked up the stairs and rang the doorbell without really thinking about it. Noises at the other side let her know that someone was there, but the noise seemed so far away. Emancipated. Wow. Did this really happen?
«Oh» Said a voice. It took Alex about a minute to realise the door was open, and that Jodie was standing there, watching her. The blonde did not even notice the other girl's discomfort. All she could think about was the forms lying in her car. And the look on her parents face.
«...Alex are you...» Started Jodie, realising that something was wrong, but she got interrupted by someone behind her.
«Oh hi» Said a redhead girl. She had a huge smile on her face and innocently held her hand to the newcomer.
«I'm Britt» She said. Alex looked up for the first time, barely understanding what was happening. What was she doing here? Who was this girl? Why was Jodie acting so weird? What...
«I'm sorry, I shouldn't be here.» Alex mumbled. Why was her voice shaky? Why was she trembling? Suddenly things seemed blurry.
«Wait» Jodie said, grabbing her hand. «I didn't think we were like that...» Alex pulled her hand back.
«It's not that» She said. «I don't care about her. I just... »
«You just what?» Jodie asked, looking straight at her.
«Nothing» Alex said. «You don't get it. It was stupid to come here. Just go back inside and waste your life away on sex drugs and alcohol.»
«Wow» Jodie stopped her. «Where did that come from? What gives you the right to judge me like that?»
«You're just another shallow being who goes through motions and doesn't take a minute to actually see what's going on around you.» Alex screamed, getting down the stairs and walking back to her car. She kept screaming insults, anything that could hurt the brunette. She wasn't even sure if Jodie was still listening, but she kept going. She felt like she had to. As if hurting someone else would pass her pain to the other. But as she climbed back in her car, she was not only still feeling hollow, but also ragging. Who would have thought she could feel even worse?
.::.
«You followed me home?» Alex asked, not turning her head to face her.
«You wouldn't answer your phone or text messages» Jodie said. «... you're running away?» She then asked, noticing the packing.
«More like leaving» The blonde replied. «Where's Britt?» She then asked sarcastically. Jodie sighed.
«Get out. We need to talk. You owe me at least that much before disappearing.»
«I don't owe you shit.» Alex spat. She put the car on drive and started going forward, hoping the brunette would let go, but Jodie turned out to be much more persistent and hopped in the car from the back while it was rolling.
«Jodie fuck!» Alex cursed as the girl slid herself in the passenger's seat.
«Funny» Jodie replied, «Cause you see, I was the one who thought I didn't owe you anything, but then you still act like a jealous fucking girlfriend!»
«Jodie fuck not everything is about you!» The brunette nodded and kept silent.
.::.
«You're still here?» Was the warm welcome she got as she walked back in the house. Alex clenched her first and made her way to her room. Don't talk. Don't engage, she told herself.
«Hey I'm talking to you» Her father screamed again. «I told you to get the fuck out of my house last night!» What was that, sobbing?
«Thanks for at least pretending to care, Madam Kelly» Alex coldly said to her mother before getting up the stairs to pack her belongings. The screaming got louder. Of course, she should have followed her instincts and not have engaged, but it was too tempting.
.::.
They have been driving for thirty minutes now. Jodie did not say a single word, she didn't ask where they were going, what had happened, nothing at all. Alex was surprisingly the first one to speak.
«I'm sorry» She said, surprising herself even more. Jodie didn't answer. She simply rubbed the girl's tight and gently squeezed it. Alex could feel Jodie's concerned eyes on her, waiting for an explanation but not rushing her into giving any.
«Look under your seat» Alex said. Jodie reached for the emancipation forms.
«Wow» She said. «How did it go?»
«They just signed them, without even thinking about it. It's as if I was nothing to them.»
«I'm really sorry» Jodie said. «You want me to drive?» She then offered. Alex shook her head in negation, but her hands were shaking and tears were blurring her vision.
«At least stop the car for a moment» Jodie said again.
«Why?» Alex shouted. «So we can drive safely? Safe from what? Hurt, pain? A little too late for that.» The blonde wasn't even looking where she was going anymore and got on two lanes, letting the Pontiac barely a second to speed up and avoid the 120Km crash. Jodie could hear angry honking, but she wasn't sure Alex could.
«I know you're hurt» She said, trying as hard as she could to hide the fear in her voice, but stop the car, let's talk about it.
«TALK» Alex screamed, punching the steering wheel at the same time. «TALK? They didn't want to talk. They didn't give a shit about what I had to say. They...»
«I'm not them» Jodie interrupted. «And if you don't stop the car we're getting both killed.» She added as another car sharply avoided a crash. To Jodie's relief, Alex seemed to have realised what she was doing and took the first exit she saw. She turned off the car and got out. There was a beach on their exit. Alex started to walk to it, Jodie followed.
«Listen I know it hurts» Jodie said, «But it's not worth getting yourself killed.»
«I only stopped the car because it wasn't fair to get you killed as well» was Alex's reply. She sat down in the sand.
«Like it's fair for you to die?» Jodie asked.
«What do I have going for me? I'm kicked out from almost every school around here, my parents just kicked me out of their lives, I don't have any friends, not one person who... » She stopped herself. Jodie sat down.
«You're the most gorgeous person I've ever seen. You've got a voice like no one, great managing skills, and retarded parents you just freed yourself from. I would marry you if I wasn't so sure you'd turn me down.» Alex smiled and squeezed her hand. Oh, the hell. She leaning in and kissed the girl. Jodie pulled back. The blonde looked at her with a confused face, to which Jodie pointed at the sea.
«The tide is about to turn» She said, smiling. She then looked back at Alex and brought their lips back together in the most passionate kiss they both ever had. And for the first time, Alex felt something different, something pleasant: Hope.
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And I'm back! =) Had to write a one shot to get back in the beat. I will now continue the stories I have already started, that one ends like this.
-Ethereal-123
